PS Mommy Thread-Newborn to 12 months!

[FrekeChild]

My last post is awesome. Talk about not finishing sentences...whoa!

That's just a reflection of how it's been around here lately. You all know how strict I keep A's schedule right? Well hahahahah! That's over with. It seems as though she really just wants to go to a single nap per day lately, although we have had a couple days where two naps sneak in. Hey, whatever she wants/needs!

So we've been having long sleeps at night and tiny little naps - usually just over an hour or so towards the middle of the day. Add a dash of nasty teething in there, and you have a long sleep with a short wake up in the middle of the night, and you get me, who is constantly on hyper alert, can't sleep during the day or at night! Yay!

I don't drink coffee, but I've been drinking a lot of tea the last couple of weeks. Yikes.

Anyway, here are a few pictures from last night and one of A's new stroller - Maclaren Volo. I love it. Bit pricey for an umbrella ($130 on Amazon) but OMG, super maneuverable, lightweight and she loves it because she can see around her so much better than she could with the big bulky stroller!

A was tired, so we didn't stay long at the party and I couldn't really get any smiles out of her, but she still looks cute. She wouldn't let me keep her hat on - and it didn't have a strap, so it would go on and come right off.

 

[missrachelk]

Hi mamas! Dipping my toe in over here - Hannah was born on 10/4 and overall we are doing well. I'm just getting time to read and catch up and I wanted to let buttons and the others - sorry I can't recall who- who are suspecting tongue or lip tie to not worry and get them checked by the best pediatric ENT you can find.

H had my nipples bleeding in he hospital by like hour 10 or life and luckily we got stared with nipple shield but things were so hard we had an Lc come the day after we got home. She saw H had a lip tie right away and it really was obvious.

We went to the ENT later that week and he ruled out tongue tie but agreed the lip frenulum was very thick and long so we clipped it. Not sure how others handle it but ours will do it in office only under 4 weeks. It was tough little miss certainly screamed but it did seem to help.

We are still on the shield, pumping and trying to make sure my supply is ok - she lost a pound of birth weight by day 4 and by day 8 had lost another oz so since then we've been supplementing with pumped BM and formula.
Add me and my Lc to the chorus of - no such thing as nipple confusion. H won't take a paci but bottles and nipples are all god to her. We're using the Tommie tippee closer to nature anti colic bottles and they are awesome! Any others we get severe spit ups and lots of burps but hardly any with the TT.
J
So dear buttons take heart that at least you know you have good supply and baby is gaining well and pump pump pump until those nipples heal! Mine were not as bad as yours but it took only one day of almost exclusive pumping to get a lot of healing accomplished.

For us the fight will be to get off the shield but we are not even trying until she regains birth weight. I'm hoping she will do so by our check on Thursday - 3 weeks old - but not holding my breath because it would take well over an oz per day from the last check for us to get there. Not sure if anyone else has flat - ish nipples but I do and we also have a huge boob tiny baby mismatch and I can see how the shield makes it easier for her to latch on. I'm trying to do as much skin to skin as I can to protect supply and also not stress even when I can't pump as often as I'd like to. I want to get off formula ASAP but will use it until we get the a-ok from her pedi that her weight gain is no longer a worry.

Thanks for listening!! Will share some pics soon!

 

[canuk-gal]

HI:

Picture of the bebes in their costumes JUST MAKES MY DAY!!!! Keep 'em coming!!!!

cheers--Sharon

 

[lliang_chi]

Rachel, just wanted to weigh in on weaning off the nipple shield. It's really no big deal. What I did was keep the nipple shields in a bowl of warm water close to hand. When E was happily nursing with the shield and he "came up for air" (popped off), I'd remove the shield, toss it in the bowl of water, then pop him back on. If he had a hard time with latching, I'd just pop the shield back on again. Eventually he was fine switching to boob, mid-feed. Then I graduated to trying to nurse sans shield at first, keeping them close at hand. If he couldn't latch, I'd pop it on and he'd nurse happily. Eventually he was able to start without needing the shield at all. When he's ravenously hungry (almost all the time), I had to "prime" him with a bottle just to get the edge off for him (and I still do this now).

Freke, can i just say I'm slain by the cuteness of your little bee. I love that she's crawling around after the pups. Is that your puppy that's dressed up like a clown? How ADORABLE!

NEL, is K dressing up for Halloween? I hope so. I can't believe she's pulling herself up. Ethan's getting close to it but not quite yet. He's still inch-worming his way around, hasn't quite figured out crawling yet. LOL! And I can't take much credit for making Ethan's costume. It's a really easy costume to make and using fleece has 2 benefits: 1) it's warm and 2) I don't need to hem the edges.

PPM, hoping you get some answers from the ENT. But don't get discouraged if you don't get a PTT diagnosis. It seriously took E 6.5 wks to "get" breastfeeding. I'd always offer my breast (at first with the nipple shield) at most feedings (not late night/middle of the night), trying 2 or 3 times but stopping before he got spitting mad. If he didn't take it, then we'd just use bottles. He eventually leared to take the breast (first with the shields). See my note to Rachel how I weaned the shields from him. If it's important to you, keep trying. Believe me, there were MANY times where I was crying as I was bottle feeding, thinking we'll never get this to work. Or both of us were crying. But keep faith. 6 wks feels like a LOOOOONG time, but you'll look back and say marvel how fast it goes.

Monkey, Freke has some great tips. I'd totally go with those. Otherwise just keep faith that it'll eventually iron out. It does I promise. Hope to see you around here more.

Dani, glad you're feeling more comfortable with breast feeding. It's totally normal that L is fussier in the evenings and hungrier in the evenings. He had the whole day of takiing in the world he might need a little extra help calming down. Whatever your tricks are to calm him down I say pull out all the stops. Some babies LOVE a warm bath to calm them down, we kept the lights dim in our apt after dark, literally to candle light level.

Bobbin, you and C have the EXACT same expression with your milkshake and her mango picture. It's ADORABLE! I'm glad she's doing well with the mesh feeder. Is she taking to solids with a spoon?

PT, OMG such adorable-ness with the pumpkin pictures!!! I want to take E to a patch now and take copious amounts of pictures! LOL!!! She still has those chunky cheeks, I just want to eat her up!!!! Must take pics of A as Snow White!!!! Maybe your pooches can have dwarf hats? Hee hee!

AFU: Mom and brother are coming up this week for Ethan's baptism. FIL is coming up for 1 night for the baptism because he can't leave MIL for longer than that. So it'll be nice to have everyone around. Will post more later.

 

[amc80]

Hi all!

Until now, B had been sleeping between us in bed, in a nap nanny (http://www.amazon.com/Nap-Nanny-Chill-Minky-Sage/dp/B004M3IDQY/ref=sr_1_2?s=baby-products&ie=UTF8&qid=1350927401&sr=1-2&keywords=nap+nanny). It's been great and super convenient for all of his middle of the night feedings. We decided it was time to move him out of our bed...mainly because I want my bed back, but also because he starts day care next week and will need to nap in a crib. He has a crib in his room and a pack n play in our room. We tried to put him in his crib, but that was a huge fail. OMG he freaked out. I think it was too dark and too quiet for him. So we put him in the PNP and it worked great...for two nights. Last night, I'm not sure what happened, he just wasn't having it. I finally put him in his swing and laid down on the couch. Next thing I know it's 4am, he's still passed out in his swing. He hadn't eaten since 10, which meant he went 6 hours between meals, which is a record. So that was pretty awesome. He started stirring so I got him up and fed him. Then I put him back down in the PNP and after a little fussing he was out.

The EFFING cat, on the other hand, almost had to kill. He kept jumping into the PNP. And this isn't a small cat, he's giant. I finally locked him out of the bedroom, which meant he was meowing for the next few hours. So, yeah, fun night!

I also got to experience the first poop in the bath. I took him out, cleaned everything, put him back in...pooped again. Really wish he ate solids, yuck.

And now, for some cuteness...I always sing "Head, shoulders, knees, and toes" to B when he's in the bath. He loves it- smiles and laughs the whole time. Well, this is what happens when the song is over-

 

[pancake]

Back for a proper post later, but since you are all getting into the Halloween spirit and LC, you were keen for me to dress up S, here is something... a poor effort I know, but cute nonetheless!

 

[mayerling]

Loving all the cute Halloween outfits!

PPM, I'm glad to hear that there might be a solution to your BF troubles.

I don't know if I've welcomed the new ladies, but welcome Buttons, MP, Dani, Sunny, MissRachel, and everyone else I might have missed!

Bobbin, how did you fare with trying to get C through sleep transitions?

AMC, I'm glad to hear sleep is getting better.

Freke, sorry to hear schedules are a little off.

Meg, Muff, and everyone else who's disappeared, how are you doing?

Hi to everyone else!

AFU, I haven't been posting much lately as I've been in a bit of a slump. N's naps are still non-existent and I've resorted to holding him for every nap (which still only lasts about 30 mins). My philosophy has been to get him to nap at all costs even if it means I'm creating a bad habit as far as having to hold him. Unfortunately his night sleep has taken a turn for the worse as well as he's gone from doing 5ish hours for the first stretch to only doing 3ish. We also seem to have instances, every night, of him waking up and screaming bloody murder (which he doesn't normally do). We can't figure out if he's just freaked out because he realised we're not holding him, or if something else is going on. Anyway, the lack of night sleep (I haven't been able to sleep in the day since he was a newborn) is getting to me which is why I haven't posted lately.
In other news, N has really bad cradle cap. We've tried olive oil and cradle cap shampoo which seems to have aggravated the condition. I can tell he's really itchy and he keeps scratching his head so there's scratches all over his scalp.

 

[pancake]

OK, back to do a proper post now.

Mayer, sorry to hear things have been tough. Did you end up trying N in a carrier? If he's going to sleep on you, you may as well try and have your hands free so you can get things done... Re the cradle cap - are you sure it's cradle cap? I ask because CC is not usually itchy. Probably worth going to see a GP who's experienced with these things. Olive oil is sometimes not recommended for CC as one of the theories behind CC is that there is a yeast that contributes to it, and olive oil helps that yeast thrive. Frequent washing, soaking/brushing off the crusts, and mineral/baby oil is the usual advice.

amc80, sometimes I have difficulty figuring out whether baby frowns or baby smiles are cuter! That picture is absolute GOLD. Sounds like you are making some progress on sleep, even if it's in fits and starts - isn't that the way with everything baby-related??

LC - which day is Ethan's baptism? How lovely to have everyone together including FIL. How is your MIL doing? Are things still stable? I hope you are going to be posting pumpkin pics (and baptism pics!) ASAP!

Rachel - lovely to see you in here! Sounds like you have a great plan sorted for feeding. I always think a lot of the battle with new parenthood is finding a way to feel somewhat in control. I never used nipple shields but many did (LC, as she posted, and I think ?Bobbin and PT might have as well) and I agree that it's not a priority to get rid of it now. Later on, as they get bigger, bubs get so good at breastfeeding that I know several girls who have just spontaneously ditched the shields one day, and off they went - no problems at all!

Freke - agreed, A looks completely delighted with her new stroller! Not quite as delighted with the bee costume, but absolutely adorable of course!

NEL, sorry to hear that you've been under the pump so much at work lately. Is there some calm in sight? Hope so... Katie is such a little livewire. It's so funny how babies practise in their sleep! (funny apart from the sleep deprivation it seems to cause their parents).

MP, the weird day-night stuff is completely normal. E will get the hang of it over time. In the meantime, keep him in the dark at night and in relative light during the day, even for naps. Apparently it helps.

PPM - how did you go with the new LC? Loved those new photos of E.

Dani, Lucas is beautiful! Welcome! The crazy thing is that you fall even MORE in love with your LO every day, indefinitely...

Bobbin - looks like you guys are going really well. OMG the childcare thing is a fiasco isn't it?! When I put S down on waiting lists at 37 weeks I was told by EVERY place that I'd left it really late...I was asking for 1-2 days/week at 12 months!!!

AFU...

1. After the two days of screaming nap refusal last week, we haven't had a repeat performance. S is definitely going through a stage of disliking being put down for naps, and she will cry (albeit mostly half-heartedly now) and/or fuss, but she's settling, and she's having her naps. They're a little shorter when totalled up compared to before, but she is super-duper-happy during her waketime, so everyone's happy.

2. She is SO exuberant at the moment. I know I say that every few posts, but she just keeps exploding even further with personality! She is enthusiastic about pretty much everything, but particularly other kids and babies, animals, peekaboo games, and she thinks it is completely HILARIOUS to play "can't catch me" games and to have air blown in her face.

3. S had ONE extra BF on Monday last week (the screaming day) and since then I have been battling a bit with engorgement and oversupply. I'm engorged in the mornings and the other day when she only took one side at a particular feed, I got a painful lump overnight - I thought these days were looooong behind me?! Like 5 months behind me - but anyway. I still feel a bit bruised where the lump was but I think it's passing. I remember in the early days I could just football-hold her to feed if I had a lump on the outer side of my boob... now she's so bloody BIG, the idea of positioning her in any way apart from cross-cradle is laughable.

4. We are getting out and about a lot these days. This age is so amazing - all of a sudden, the world is not just THERE, but it's there to be played with, talked to, brought into her little sphere. It's incredible to watch.

Today we just had the BEST day. Nothing particularly out of the ordinary, no special occasions...but it was just a really wonderful day! Here are a few snaps I took before bathtime

 

[Buttons]

Hi ladies!

I'm sorry I'm not a better participant yet, I haven't opened my laptop in weeks and posting off my phone is just so much hassle. I am seriously just barely functioning over here. Today I am super proud of myself because I've managed to shower two days in a row... and that's only because my Mam has been over both days taking care of me (yes, I have the best Mam in the world)!

To everyone who posted with advice and support for me, THANK YOU so much. It is so nice to feel the support of other Mums. With my c section I can't drive for another three weeks and am feeling very alone and isolated so it is wonderful to have a group of online cheerleaders

We ended up taking Wee Button to see a tongue tie specialist. He diagnosed an anterior tongue tie and recommended a very minor frenectomy. It made an immediate positive difference to his latch (as in, within 30 seconds of the procedure being done) and things were improving for about three days. The pain changed to a more bruised feeling and the cracks on my nipples started to heal.

The last three days though it has all gone backwards. I have been in AGONY and my LC suspects thrush based on my description of the pain. We have a check up with the doctor tomorrow so I'm going to ask to have it checked then. The nights, especially, are woeful - I am sure the neighbours are tired of listening to me screaming. Even pumping is appallingly painful at this stage so honestly I won't be able to last much longer if I don't get a solution from the doctor tomorrow.

PPM I hope your consultation with the LC went well and you are able to get some answers!

Was it MissRachel or MonkeyPrincess who asked about newborns being awake all night? The hospital paediatrician told us that's developmentally normal for the first six weeks and there's no point trying to get them to sleep longer at night before then. He said they are programmed to be awake and suckling at night in order to boost milk production as nighttime is when the production hormones are increasing in your body, and your supply is set in those first six weeks. I am right there with you in the throes of it, it is so hard!!!

Freke and LC aaahhh those photos are adorable!!! Oh my gosh!!! Such cuuuute babies!!!!

Apologies to anyone I've missed, my phone won't let me read back over the thread while I am typing. Hope everyone is doing well, please keep the costume photos coming, people don't bother with them so much here so I am just loving it!

 

[amc80]

Buttons- how frustrating! Hopefully the doc can figure something out. I suspected I had thrush for a while and finally went to the doc (a month later). I just finished a 10 day course of meds and my boobs feel SOOO much better.

Does anyone have tips for transitioning to the crib/nursery? As I mentioned in my last post, we've starting having B sleep in his PNP instead of in our bed. Last night we tried putting him in his crib again. He just screams his head off, he hates it. He slept really well in his PNP though. In fact, he slept all the way until about 4am, which was awesome. That's two nights in a row where he's gone 6 hours between feeds, so hopefully it's a new trend! After he was asleep for about 10 minutes last night, he woke up SCREAMING. We basically just patted him for a few minutes and stuck his paci back in, and he went back to sleep.We'd really like to get him to his room though. The only thing I can think of is having him sleep in his PNP in his room?

 

[monarch64]

Hi all, just a quick drop-in to say hello and post some pics. Alex will be 5 months old this week. We hosted our 3rd annual Pumpkin Carving party over the weekend, here she is with some pumpkins we carved. It was especially difficult to get her to look at the camera and smile due to all the outdoor distractions in the backyard!

 

[parrot tulips]

Sleep regression. Never been this bad before. At 11 1/2 months (9 1/2 adjusted), Ava has gone from waking only once over a 13 hour period, to waking every hour or two. Screaming. Ugh. Exhausted.

 

[NewEnglandLady]

Loving all of these photos!

PT, I'm so sorry to hear about the sleep regression. I know how hard it is to feel like you're taking two steps back. I wonder what could be the cause of the screaming? Fever? Teeth? Did she recently make the switch to cow's milk and maybe her tummy hurts? I assume naps are still fine?

amc, we also had issues with the transition. She was in a rock and play in our bedroom and we transitioned to the crib in the nursery. I tried a few things, but ultimately discovered the transition to the crib seemed a little tougher than the transition to the nursery. I put her crib in our bedroom for a week or two so I could soothe her quickly when she woke. Once she was back to STTN, I moved her to her nursery. That was no problem at all--she had no issues being in her nursery once she was used to the crib.

You could try moving the pack and play to the nursery to see if that helps. Or try the crib in the bedroom. Transitions are always tough!

 

[amc80]

amc, we also had issues with the transition. She was in a rock and play in our bedroom and we transitioned to the crib in the nursery. I tried a few things, but ultimately discovered the transition to the crib seemed a little tougher than the transition to the nursery. I put her crib in our bedroom for a week or two so I could soothe her quickly when she woke. Once she was back to STTN, I moved her to her nursery. That was no problem at all--she had no issues being in her nursery once she was used to the crib.

You could try moving the pack and play to the nursery to see if that helps. Or try the crib in the bedroom. Transitions are always tough!

Thanks for the tips! Moving the crib to our room would require taking it apart...so I think we will try the PNP in the nursery. As of next week, he will be forced to nap in a crib at day care, so that should hopefully help things out again. I feel sorry for the day care workers who have to deal with it...but slightly happy that it's them and not me. Is that wrong?

 

[MuffDog]

Hi girls!! So sorry for being totally MIA since luca was born. Being a mom has been harder than I expected and I've felt very unmotivated. I have a personal blog and haven't even really written on that either. Sad.

Anyways as I've mentioned things with L started out rough and we spent the first three months just barely holding on. Colic. Overtired. Gas. Who knows. Crying all the time. Screaming the rest.

I am happy to report things are much better. He is 4 months and 1 week old now and 13lbs6oz. He rolls, smiles, laughs once in a while and is generally much happier. It is funny because during the first three months I was never home. Luca would only sleep on the go and screamed when he wasn't sleeping so I was pretty much on the go all day. Now that he is on a sleep schedule (more of a routine) I am stuck at home all day!! He only goes 1.5 hours between naps and he is a slow eater so there isn't much time to do anything. I won't complain though. It is only after really starting to put his sleep first that I saw a difference in his happiness.

I hope everyone is doing well! Love reading your posts even if I don't respond.

 

[FrekeChild]

Meh. Tired. Barely functioning. So, bullet points.

1. Transitioned (successfully!) from Rock N Play to crib
2. Re-started physical therapy
3. Turned 11 months yesterday
4. Started chewing on crib rails
5. Started buying birthday and Christmas presents
6.

She woke up. More later.

 

[Loves Vintage]

Just have to pop in here to say, MuffDog, oh.my.goodness! CUTENESS! What a perfect photo!! Sorry to hear about the rough beginning, and glad to hear things have gotten better. He really is soooo ADORABLE!

PT - Teething? Maybe try some tylenol to see if it helps? We always tried Tylenol on nights like that, and it almost always got her back to her regular sleep.

 

[parrot tulips]

NEL & LV - It's definitely teething (and hopefully nothing else...no fever and no cow's milk yet, unless I add some to whatever I cook for her). Sunday her top left tooth started to break through, and yesterday her top right as well. Poor thing. I forgot to give Tylenol last night, but did remember tonight. This top set of teeth seems much more painful than the bottom. We also have a house guest, and the guest room is right across from A's. Our wood floors are super squeaky, and Ava is a ridiculously light sleeper, so I'm sure that doesn't help matters.

MuffDog - How sweet is that photo!?! Glad to hear that you and Luca are getting things figured out. He certainly looks like a happy baby!

Monarch - Alex is a gorgeous, very well dressed little lady.

Pancake - Those pictures of Sylvie make me smile. She comes across as so sweet and happy in her photos. I agree that it's a lot of fun watching the personalities emerge, and how aware the kiddos become of the world. I think it's a hoot that Ava loves people watching. She cranes her neck and twists her whole torso to get a better look at someone she finds interesting (it's a good thing people don't get annoyed when babies stare).

amc - I love the pouty lip!

AFU - New teeth, drippy nose, and the runs. Ava doesn't seem too uncomfortable, but she's had better weeks. Still not crawling yet. Which is easier for me, but I hate seeing how frustrated she gets when she can't get to something that's just barely out of reach.

Cutest thing happened on Tuesday. Ava goes to a music class which is primarily composed of younger toddlers. A little boy crawled up to Ava and rested his forehead against hers, then started smiling. With foreheads still touching, he began patting her arm. When it got a little rough, his mother pulled him away. He crawled right back up to her, rested his forehead against hers, the started smiling again. This time Ava reached out and started patting him. It's the first time she's interacted with another baby/toddler. She usually just watches.

Ugh. Crying baby again. She's only been asleep an hour...

 

[monkeyprincess]

Hi ladies. Can't get over all of the beautiful babies on this thread. I read your posts and wonder how you all seem to have everything so figured out. Right now, I'm scrambling just to get through each day. Please tell me that you didn't have your baby figured out at 12 days!!!

I didn't realize how woefully underprepared I was to care for a newborn, if you ever can be prepared. So, if anyone has time to answer a few questions for a first-time, clueless mom, I would really appreciate it! I just feel frazzled and worried I'm doing everything wrong. I promise I will not keep posting me-centered posts. I could just really use some feedback.

1. Did anyone have a really squirmy baby that was nearly impossible to swaddle? We have miracle blanket, which sometimes works, but it is a real struggle to get him in there properly. He loves his arms, and he is able to kick his legs out the bottom. Regular blankets do not work well for him because he is too squirmy and kicks out easily. Is there a better product? Do the ones with velcro work? He does seem to sleep better at night when properly swaddled, so I'd like to find a solution.

2. Unfortunately, baby is having latching problems and I'm having supply problems and really am not sure I can commit to exclusive pumping, so we are probably going to be doing mostly formula feeding. He still hase about half a pound to go to get up to birth weight. I know breast is best, but for his well-being and my sanity (and sleep-deprived state), I think we will end up formula feeding. For those of you who are formula feeding, do you use premade or powder? We are using premade which was convenient when he only wanted 2 oz, but now that we are bumping that up, we end up having to refrigerate it, and then it has to be heated up. We had been using bottles with liners, but they probably won't work in a bottle warmer. How do you heat your bottles?

3. Baby seems to always end up sleeping on his side. He turns his head and kind of kicks his legs over to the side. Should I be worried about this? Doctor said we would watch it and see if we needed to do neck exercises and possible use rolled towels to keep him on his back.

4. He screams bloody murder every time we change diapers or clothes? Do they grow out of that? It is just so upsetting for him and stressful for us.

5. How oftend did/do you bathe your newborn?

6. Is it okay that we do not really have a routine at all? Is it okay if for the next couple weeks, we just survive by doing what works? At this point, I haven't really learned to read his cues and each day is different. I just want to make sure I'm not setting us up for a problem later but not trying to do things the same way each time at the same time.

Thanks so much in advance for any advice you can give. It is scary having a newborn and trying to figure out his needs!

 

[monkeyprincess]

Double post.

 

[pavelover]

Hugs to all the mommas with newborns! Gosh I remember clearly how hard it was so just know it will end and you are doing a great job! I don't really "belong" here but I was browsing and saw a lot of posts from you all about how hard it is so just wanted to empathize.

MP I thought I would at least offer you some reassurance since everyone has their hands full here! I didn't use formula much but can try to help. I don't think anybody would have it figured out by 12 days, I'm telling you. I'm sure you are really doing a good job I think it's just that we expect a lot out of ourselves and also even though people might share some of their struggles they don't really explain how time consuming and tiring and frustrating caring for their newborn can be. Sleep deprivation is just the worst thing ever, seriously. So just get through little chunks of the day and give yourself a pat on the back!

Swaddle We did use the velcro ones. My son was in one forever. seriously. my instinct would say that if he likes to be free let him be free but if you see it's impacting his naps then I would try and get him swaddled too. I'm not sure but it might be a question of practice with regular blankets and also you could try two blankets. The nurses in the hospital get them so snug, right? try the velcro sac and see how it is for you. Amazon? right to your door hopefully.

BF you have a good attitude! You have to stay sane. I struggled to get T on the boob for a lonnng time. It was incredibly hard. Regarding formula powder vs premade- are you doing it all yourself now? Maybe dh could set up a day or half days worth of bottles? stick in fridge? We microwaved water and then stuck the bottle in there- test it once or twice and then it should be good to go. I never had a bottle warmer so I can't speak to that method but it seemed easy? When I used bm bottles I would try to just let them warm up on the counter for a bit (mean? Maybe) and then go for it. It didnt seem to be a problem. Could you leave your water dispenser on counter (room temp) and see how he did with a bottle like that? I say less steps for you is best.
Regarding exclusive pumping- this is just an idea and not meant to induce guilt so please understand that- exclusive is rigid and not feeling like somethign you could do right now- what if you thought of a number of pumps you could deal with (like a couple) and see if you get any milk. Granted if you are having supply problems this may not work but if it did and you could still provide some breast milk then it's a win-win. You are sane and happier and baby gets some mbm. Also, I haven't read every day so if you already did please ignore me, but there are some very good lactation consultants who may be able to help you. You know what's right for you but I just wanted to point out that I didn't realize when I had my son that I could tweak whatever I wanted and do it my way. I felt this desire to do it "right" and didn't consider that there are shades of what's right for everyone.

Neck I don't think at 12 days I would worry too much about it. I didn't notice for a while that my son seemed to have tight muscles etc and I felt awful for never noticing. We ended up getting early intervention (he was in nicu, had surgery etc) but it didn't even focus on pt. If I had to do it again, I would have been better about tummy time when it was appropriate (like maybe let him fuss a little more but remain on tummy) as I always gave up if he cried. try the rolled up blanket like the dr suggested and then keep an eye but he's so young. Maybe he is developing preferences but he is so young he's likely to change.
Crying with diaper change! OH MY! I thought I was the only one. My kid acted like we were torturing him and I swore it was from being in the hospital, but maybe I was wrong since you are experiencing the same. I would say that some are more sensitive than others. Think about their little nervous systems as kind of raw- and they are still getting more used to the world. I swear it will pass. Hugs cause I know it's the worst. I used to try and sing and do whatever but nothing worked. So just find a way for you to deal- like hum or something and try to ignore it in a way. Obviously you are not ignoring your baby cause you are changing him. I hope this is coming out correctly?
Bathing MP I am a pediatric nurse but I was afraid to bathe my own baby, lol. I left it to my husband. He probably got a bath a couple times a week. If I had to do it again, I would do something with a damp wash cloth more frequently than a full on bath. then a bath every few days. They don't need much and their skin could get dry if u do more. get under the neck, the private bits more frequently.

Routine Again, it's early. Give yourself a break. Every person is different but I suspect you will fall into a rythym soon (i can never spell this word). Yes just get through right now and you are likely doing what every other mom is doing. It's rare those babies that are like a textbook. I am hoping to get one (or two) this time around but you know I'm probably dreaming. When your baby gets a little older, something like EASY is nice because it makes sense to me (eat, activity, sleep, I cant remember what Y is for lol).
Lots of hugs going out to you and all the moms here. Looking back (when the time is right for you) I would have gotten out more so I didn't feel so isolated. i joined a really nice mom's group but I think I waited too long as I was really having a hard time adjusting. If I had felt that support and known there were others going through the same I think it would have been easier.
hope at least some part of this is helpful.

 

[amc80]

Hi MP! I can answer some of your questions-

1. Yes, B was/is SUPER squirmy. We used the miracle blanket for the same reasons you do. He was always able to free at least one leg. He squirmed and cried like crazy when trying to put him in it, but the second it was done he would be at peace. It would take him approximately 5 seconds to get out of the velcro ones, the MB is definitely the best one we tried. The key to it is making sure that the arm holder flaps aren't bunched up at all- they need to be covering his entire arm. Then you have to make sure the outside layer is pretty tight as well.

2. Do what works well for your sanity. I would have shed far less tears had we used some formula earlier on. Don't stress about it, your baby will be fine either way. On, and remember you're supposed to use any formula within an hour of when he starts eating, and then throw out whatever isn't used. Which is annoying. Not sure if the risk of bacteria is really as big a deal as they make it, or if it's just a ploy for formula companies to make more money.

3. No sure about this. Maybe he just prefers his side?

4. B does this as well. He hates having his diaper changed. It was especially bad for the first month or so. Even today, if he's at all fussy and we try to change his diaper he freaks out. Same with changing his clothes, he hates it.

5. I think we bathed him every 2-3 days in the beginning. Now we aim for every night and it happens about 90% of the time. And the only reason we bathe him that often now is because he likes it and he kicks around like crazy, so it tires him out a bit.

6. Survival is key at this point. B is 11 weeks old and we are just now getting into some sort of routine. Newborns are needy little creatures and I found it impossible to plan for anything. Feed him when he's hungry, change when dirty...and that's about it.

 

[FrekeChild]

MP

ETA: 1. A just didn't take to being swaddled. We did it at the very beginning with plain blankets, but she would squirm her arms out because she hated being confined inside the blanket. Which was fine, because then we never had to wean her off of it.

2. Warming milk - hot water and a bowl, and about 5 minutes.

3. I would watch him. A rolled the first time at 5 weeks, and we were told later that that can be the first sign of torticollis. Does he do it to one side only? Don't worry about it at this point, but be aware of looking for it, and keep an eye out for flat spots - I wish we'd known to do this from the beginning!

4. That's normal. He'll get over it eventually. A still doesn't love getting her clothes or diaper changed.

5. Not often enough! She got lots of sponge baths because she was awful to bathe and we were totally terrified of it. But the sooner you get them started, the faster they end up liking it. Our Ped just said to have everything super ready before you start so that it only takees a couple minutes from start to finish. We would turn the heat way up so the air would be warmer when we took her out. And she's only been bathed twice by me alone. I would say that the two of you should do it together as much as possible - doing it alone is hard! No matter what though, he's probably not going to actually LIKE bathtime until about 3 months.

6. Don't worry about routines! The first weeks are about just getting through it. We were talking last night about how we did plenty of things wrong in the beginning, and about how we're having to fix that stuff now, but we did what we needed to so that we could make it through those few weeks with our sanity intact. It just takes time. Get sleep when you can, and don't worry about cleaning. No one cares! Trust me!

Luckily newborns are simple creatures - change their diapers when they are wet, feed them when they are hungry and let them sleep whenever they want!

And my best advice? Don't forget to eat! The world looks much bleaker on an empty stomach! Take care of yourself too!

 

[lliang_chi]

Quick drive by picture post. Ethan's daycare had a Halloween costume parade today. Here he is in his pumpkin costume!

 

[stephbolt]

Hi ladies. Can't get over all of the beautiful babies on this thread. I read your posts and wonder how you all seem to have everything so figured out. Right now, I'm scrambling just to get through each day. Please tell me that you didn't have your baby figured out at 12 days!!!

I didn't realize how woefully underprepared I was to care for a newborn, if you ever can be prepared. So, if anyone has time to answer a few questions for a first-time, clueless mom, I would really appreciate it! I just feel frazzled and worried I'm doing everything wrong. I promise I will not keep posting me-centered posts. I could just really use some feedback.

1. Did anyone have a really squirmy baby that was nearly impossible to swaddle? We have miracle blanket, which sometimes works, but it is a real struggle to get him in there properly. He loves his arms, and he is able to kick his legs out the bottom. Regular blankets do not work well for him because he is too squirmy and kicks out easily. Is there a better product? Do the ones with velcro work? He does seem to sleep better at night when properly swaddled, so I'd like to find a solution.

2. Unfortunately, baby is having latching problems and I'm having supply problems and really am not sure I can commit to exclusive pumping, so we are probably going to be doing mostly formula feeding. He still hase about half a pound to go to get up to birth weight. I know breast is best, but for his well-being and my sanity (and sleep-deprived state), I think we will end up formula feeding. For those of you who are formula feeding, do you use premade or powder? We are using premade which was convenient when he only wanted 2 oz, but now that we are bumping that up, we end up having to refrigerate it, and then it has to be heated up. We had been using bottles with liners, but they probably won't work in a bottle warmer. How do you heat your bottles?

3. Baby seems to always end up sleeping on his side. He turns his head and kind of kicks his legs over to the side. Should I be worried about this? Doctor said we would watch it and see if we needed to do neck exercises and possible use rolled towels to keep him on his back.

4. He screams bloody murder every time we change diapers or clothes? Do they grow out of that? It is just so upsetting for him and stressful for us.

5. How oftend did/do you bathe your newborn?

6. Is it okay that we do not really have a routine at all? Is it okay if for the next couple weeks, we just survive by doing what works? At this point, I haven't really learned to read his cues and each day is different. I just want to make sure I'm not setting us up for a problem later but not trying to do things the same way each time at the same time.

Thanks so much in advance for any advice you can give. It is scary having a newborn and trying to figure out his needs!

Hugs MP, you are doing great mama! Life with a newborn is all about survival mode!

No advice on 1 or 2, but here's a few thoughts...

3. Nora was a side sleeper too when she was brand new, it seemed to me she liked to get back into the position she had been in in the womb! She grew out of it by a few weeks, I never worried since she couldn't get her face pushed up against anything and wasn't strong enough to roll all the way over.

4. She was a screamer when we changed her diapers too! I remember my MIL visited for the first time when she was 4 days old and she thought we were sticking pins in her or something when we took her upstairs to change her diaper. This too shall pass, by a few weeks old she was much calmer.

5. From the beginning we have bathed her every 5 days or so? No real set schedule. She doesn't hate bathtime but she doesn't get that dirty so it's one less thing for us to worry about in our busy lives. We keep her diaper area clean and wipe down her face/hands/neck with a washcloth every day. Maybe when she's more mobile we will bathe her more, but you don't *have* to.

6. Keep on doing what works! The only important things to do in the first six weeks is make sure everyone in your house is as well fed and rested as they can be. He will get into more of a routine eventually! And I really believe you can't teach bad habits to a teeny baby, your only job is to feed and comfort them.

 

[stephbolt]

And hi mamas! I've been reading and checking and loving all the pics of the beautiful babes around here! And so exciting to have some new mamas here too!

Life as a FT working mama is hard! I feel like I am going nonstop every second of the day between commute, work, the bare minimum of housework, and of course my beautiful girl. She'll be 4 months old this weekend. We've hit the 4 months sleep regression over the last two weeks and oh boy that is swaying the delicate balance from "I can handle this" to "oh my gosh this is so hard I want to cry." My mom is actually on her way here right now for a long weekend and I am so glad to have another set of hands around and maybe get a little sleep. But I keep telling myself that this will pass and maybe one day we'll even forget it enough to do this again! Here's Miss Nora!

 

[lliang_chi]

Monkey, I wanted to answer some of your questions:

1. Swaddle: We used the miracle blanket also. Ditto what AMC said, make sure the arm flaps are flapped flat over his arms, and tuck them under his butt. Then pop his legs in the pocket. Then use the shorter outer flap to tuck into his side, then the long one all the way around. I can't remember if Ethan used to squirm. I think he did because J could never get the swaddle as tight as I could. He finally watched me really TUG on the swaddle and pin E down in it (nearly horrified I might add). But babies are a lot hardier than you think. Give the swaddle a little tug as you're tucking him in and you'll see he'll be nice and snug. Ethan grew out of the velcro swaddle we had pretty quickly, so we just stuck with the miracle blankets.

2. Formula and bottle heating: Ethan didn't really do much formula until recently. And he doesn't really like formula (powdered) so I have to cut it with BM. So my bottles are all pre-mixed. FWIW: Parents have to bring into daycare the formula bottles pre-mixed. Once they're mixed they stay in the fridge until the they heat them up. Needs to be consumed within the hour. As far as a bottle warmer, day care uses crock pots. So I used a coffee mug warmer with a beef stein of hot water on the counter @ all times. I'd pop a bottle in the warmer every 1.5 when Ethan was a wee baby. He used to eat pretty much every 2 -2.5 hrs. (http://www.amazon.com/Mr-Coffee-MWBLK-Mug-Warmer/dp/B000CO89T8/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1351186066&sr=8-1&keywords=coffee+mug+warmer)
ETA: When Ethan started teething, we'd give him the milk cold, straight from the fridge. I think the cold milk helped his gums feel better.

3. Flat head etc: Ethan used to always look to his left. I was really concerned about flat head etc. I used to roll up a swaddle blanket and tuck it on his side so he'd look to his right from time to time. Also I'd change him so he'd have to look to the right to face me. I agree with Freke, but cognizant of it, and keep bringing it up to his pedi when you go in for the fast and furious appts (2wk, 4 wk, 8 wk, 16 wk etc).

4. Screaming during changes: Yes, yes and yes. It gets better. A) You get better at it and B) He gets more used to it. It's a lot of senses being happening all at once: bright bathroom lights, clothes being removed (cold air), diaper area being wiped (cold wipes), etc. I left a night light near his changing area (his bathroom), so I never had to turn the bright lights on during the nighttime. I kept the apt @ 73-74F all the time. Didn't have a wipes warmer, but if that's something you want to do you can try it. Also I would talk to him and let him know what I was doing. (OK, I'm going to take your diaper off for changing. I'm wiping your bum now. This is going to go over your head and I know you don't like it, but it'll be quick). Oh and he *haaated* onesies that I'd have to pull over his head for the first 3 months of his life.

5. We gave E a bath once every 5 days. He got really bad eczema on his legs so frequent bathing would've been the wrong way to go for us. We had to sit him in warm water to clean his poopy diapers because he had a pretty stubborn diaper rash, hence the eczema on his legs. We did a top & tail clean every day though (warm wash cloth to clean his face/neck and he'd get dunked and that'd clean his diaper aread).

6. Do you what you need to do survive. At 12 days old it'd be impossible to get him on a routine. He'll sort out his routine on his own. Subconsciously you're going to tune into his routine. We logged everything on baby-connect.com, so when I started getting anxious at certain times because it "felt" like he was going to get up soon, I looked up his logs and sure enough he was getting into a routine.

 

[monarch64]

MP, honestly those first few weeks were a total blur. They were the best, most awful weeks of my life at the same time because of the sleep deprivation and breast-feeding struggles. In every other regard I feel like I had an easy baby, and I really tried my best not to stress about things and to MAKE time for myself.

1. We used Aiden & Anais blankets to swaddle our babe for a few weeks. We would wrap her up SOTIGHT but she'd still get at least an arm out. Sleep was an issue for the first few weeks, and then my brother and SIL bought us a swing. Sleep problem solved.

2. I won't regale you with my breastfeeding story, but we switched to exclusive FFing at 2 months, 3 weeks. We have always used powdered, and only make a bottle at a time as needed using hot water.

3. She has always slept on her side or her back when she's on a flat surface like her crib or even our bed when I let her nap there. No issues with this, but I have been super diligent about tummy time since day 4 of her life after reading some of the issues people had gone through here on PS.

4. I don't know what to say about the diaper changing issue. Some babies hate it, some babies don't care. My kid thinks it's funny. They're all weirdos, ya know?

5. As a newborn, she was bathed every 3rd or 4th day. Between baths we would wipe her down with hand & face wipes, clean her neck and diaper area really well, etc. I am the primary bath-giver at this point and I get everything prepped first, make sure she's not hungry, has pooped recently, isn't too tired, and then we go for it and this is if I have time. So I'd say she gets a bath every other day in a good week, and she's five months old now. I have always tried to make bathtime fun, I let her look at the water in the tub and touch the bubbles first, then when I sit her in it I immediately start singing some silly song I made up and put the warm washcloth on her belly RIGHTAWAY so she feels less naked. She gives me a look first like "mom why are you doing this to me" but I just carry on like we are having the best time in the world and then she gets into it. After the bath, I blow dry her hair and she freakin' loves it.

6. Routine? What is this routine you speak of? No routine here, and guess what? Everyone survived, and the child is thriving, happy, healthy, and seriously easy going.

 

[amc80]

Am I the only one with a kid who loves the bath? I think he hated his first two or so, and it's been love ever since. He kicks and laughs and has a grand ol' time. But we always joked that he would be the next Michael Phelps, so maybe that's why Seriously, the kid's wingspan is ridiculous.

 

[choro72]

1. YES, he pops out of the swaddle in 2 seconds so we gave up swaddling! But it's probably better if the velcro swaddle works for you. He slept quicker whenever we DID manage to swaddle him.

2. My friends who supplement with formula use powder. AFM, MIL warms water in the microwave, then sticks the bottle in the warm water. We have a bottle warmer (gift), but it sometimes spilled my precious pumped milk all over the counter ( ), so I refused to use that again.

3. Does he sleep on both sides? If your baby only prefers only one side, then I suggest you turn his head whenever you diaper change or tummy time. Otherwise, I wouldn't worry.

4. Oh he used to scream EVERY time. Even now at 4.5 months old he would scream if I change him when he's cranky. It gets better though. Soon your baby will start smiling at you and begin to reach for the wipe box. It also helps if someone else looks at the baby in the eye and talk to them while you change the diaper.

5. I bathe him every day. It's probably not necessary, but he LOVES his bath time! He hated it at first, but now no matter how tired he is he can't get enough of the running water.

6. Routine? HUH? I just started figuring out his tired cue! I've probably made the worst habit of all, which is sleeping with him latched on my boob. I have sleep issues before I was pregnant, and this is the only way I can survive. Kudos to all the moms who is patient enough to put the baby to sleep at 2AM.