Single Ladies Small Talk

[princesss]

Sorry you're going stir crazy, BEG. I can't imagine winter in MT. And I think going for the interview is a good thing - honestly, even if you hate it I think working for a year or two might be a good thing. You've been in school for SO long that I think having a few years off could really help clear your mind a bit. Plus making a dent in your school debt would be good. (Sorry. Super practical me is coming out right now. Feel free to tell me to butt out.)

Strawder, I'm so excited for your concert! You're going to have so much fun!

Last night was SO random. I had a little pout fest at not hearing from E1, and then told myself to calm it down. It was one date. ONE. One really awesome date, but just one date. So I focused on having fun and just hanging out with my friends. So we go to a few bars, and we walk into the last bar and we pass this guy and I say, "Hey, guys....I think I went to high school with him." Now, both of my friends grew up here, so they didn't really look that surprised. So I tried again. "Guys, I think I went to high school with him in Singapore." Yup. Definitely ran into one of the most popular guys in my HS at a bar in freaking NC. We danced and talked and had a good time but then he had to go home and I had to take my friend J home. It was nuts. I've seen him once before and we kind of knew both of us live here, but in 2.5 years we've seen each other once before this. So insane.

 

[Brown.Eyed.Girl]

Princesss- How was last night? I totally know what you mean about getting upset about caring when you didn't want to in the first place. LOL, I do that shiz all the time. Just keep busy and when you aren't expecting it, you will hear from him. Plus, with this job, yeah, guys heads are totally different when it comes to work and play separation. So, you are awesome and really have nothing to worry 'bout.

B.E.G- LOL, nicknames I am easy with. Whatever you want is cool, seems like I get Straw a lot so I am good with that. LOL, if you knew the list of nicknames that I hear on a daily basis from varying groups of friends you would laugh.

Can I come play?! I want to see snow. Gaawww, it hasn't even gotten close to freezing here yet. Actually, today was the first time I saw my breath. Seriously, Texas Winters are cramping my ability to show off my awesome winter wardrobe.

We are leaving tomorrow for the concert, I am actually getting a little excited....we shall see what comes of it- but, like Princesss- I don't want to get my hopes up or anything. So, I will have an update on Sunday.

Come play! We have LOTS of snow and cold weather - it's 3 degrees outside (or was an hour ago - I think it's colder now). I broke out my scarf and my down jacket and my Uggs. I love my Uggs and heavy sweaters. Ok, I guess I do like winter because I get to wear cute winter clothes but come on, single digit temps are just ridiculous! I can't wait for the update! Hope you have LOTS of fun!!

Sorry you're going stir crazy, BEG. I can't imagine winter in MT. And I think going for the interview is a good thing - honestly, even if you hate it I think working for a year or two might be a good thing. You've been in school for SO long that I think having a few years off could really help clear your mind a bit. Plus making a dent in your school debt would be good. (Sorry. Super practical me is coming out right now. Feel free to tell me to butt out.)

Strawder, I'm so excited for your concert! You're going to have so much fun!

Last night was SO random. I had a little pout fest at not hearing from E1, and then told myself to calm it down. It was one date. ONE. One really awesome date, but just one date. So I focused on having fun and just hanging out with my friends. So we go to a few bars, and we walk into the last bar and we pass this guy and I say, "Hey, guys....I think I went to high school with him." Now, both of my friends grew up here, so they didn't really look that surprised. So I tried again. "Guys, I think I went to high school with him in Singapore." Yup. Definitely ran into one of the most popular guys in my HS at a bar in freaking NC. We danced and talked and had a good time but then he had to go home and I had to take my friend J home. It was nuts. I've seen him once before and we kind of knew both of us live here, but in 2.5 years we've seen each other once before this. So insane.

Ugh, I am making a pro/con list for getting sucked back into law. I'm definitely a talker when it comes to problems and stresses, so sorry in advance - this might come up a lot later, especially after the interview! But I don't want to be a lawyer!! Bah, my head is spinning.

Ok, that is just INSANE that a guy from high school in SINGAPORE (that you knew!) ended up in the same bar! Talk about small world. Then again, a classmate from Hawaii is in my hometown now because he's stationed here, and a friend of mine from Hawaii and a friend of mine from Texas ended up going to the same college and becoming roommates. They realized they both knew me later through FB! So weirdness abounds.

I want E1 to call you RIGHT NOW.

 

[princesss]

Aaaaaaaaand E1 apparently started "casually" seeing somebody a few weeks before we went out.

 

[Brown.Eyed.Girl]

Aaaaaaaaand E1 apparently started "casually" seeing somebody a few weeks before we went out.

What???

He just now told you this?!?

 

[Andelain]

Think I'll poke my head in here since I'm single, too.

I'm crowding 50, been married a couple times, divorced from #2. I sent him down the road about 14 years ago and have dated a little since then, but haven't gotten serious many times, and never for very long. I have a man in my life now that wants to get married very much, but I'm in no hurry. I'm not sure he's right for me, or how compatible we are. The fact that I'm military and in Iraq puts that on the back burner, too. I've only been in for a few years, it's been something. Especially when the Iraqi's start shooting at me or rocketing the base.

I used to wish I could find someone and live happily ever after, but now I'm not so sure. I know I'd love to have someone there for the companionship, but I'm not stuck on commitement anymore. If either of us wants to go then we should. That's part of why I may not marry my man even though he's a sweetheart. That and I've gone through somethings in my life recently that have changed my outlook on a lot of things. In a sense I have to rediscover myself before I can choose a partner.


So here I am in the Single's Bar.

 

[Brown.Eyed.Girl]

Think I'll poke my head in here since I'm single, too.

I'm crowding 50, been married a couple times, divorced from #2. I sent him down the road about 14 years ago and have dated a little since then, but haven't gotten serious many times, and never for very long. I have a man in my life now that wants to get married very much, but I'm in no hurry. I'm not sure he's right for me, or how compatible we are. The fact that I'm military and in Iraq puts that on the back burner, too. I've only been in for a few years, it's been something. Especially when the Iraqi's start shooting at me or rocketing the base.

I used to wish I could find someone and live happily ever after, but now I'm not so sure. I know I'd love to have someone there for the companionship, but I'm not stuck on commitement anymore. If either of us wants to go then we should. That's part of why I may not marry my man even though he's a sweetheart. That and I've gone through somethings in my life recently that have changed my outlook on a lot of things. In a sense I have to rediscover myself before I can choose a partner.


So here I am in the Single's Bar.

Hi Andelain! I'm glad you stopped by and joined us! (I absolutely love your jewelry btw

I think it's good to discover more about yourself before committing to anything. I definitely don't have the life experiences that you do, but I found in my last relationship that it was really hard sometimes to keep a track of myself and what I wanted, versus what he wanted. It was all too easy to try to mold myself into what was ideal for him (which involved having a future that skipped from country to country, always on vacation, no kids, no family, no house), and that would have been a disaster for me. I know what you mean about rediscovering yourself before choosing a partner. I feel like for the last three years, I've been what a lot of other people have wanted me to be (the good daughter, the smart lawyer, the good girlfriend) and now I get to find out what I want to do and be. It's scary but invigorating!

How much longer will you be in Iraq? My dad is retired Air Force, but he has a serious cause of the traveling itch, so a few years after he retired, he got a job with a defense contractor. He's lived in Oman, Kuwait, Qatar, and Iraq. The year he was in Iraq was terrifying for my mom and I, and apparently very uncomfortable for him (he said he was living and working in tents in Baghdad). I remember one time I saw a news report about a suicide bomber in Baghdad and I freaked out, since I didn't know if that was in close proximity to where he was. I remember calling and e-mailing him, and it turns out he hadn't even realized there had been a suicide bombing. He's back in Oman now, and I'm so much happier.

I am sending you lots of safety vibes out there!

 

[princesss]

Aaaaaaaaand E1 apparently started "casually" seeing somebody a few weeks before we went out.

What???

He just now told you this?!?

Yup. Best part? He definitely said that "Maybe I'll see you playing Ultimate..." Umm, he has never played. Which means he wants to invade my safe space to try to keep me as back burner girl.

Trust me. If this boy thinks he's ever going to get a shot with me now, he's going to have to W.O.R.K. F.O.R. I.T.

 

[Brown.Eyed.Girl]

Aaaaaaaaand E1 apparently started "casually" seeing somebody a few weeks before we went out.

What???

He just now told you this?!?

Yup. Best part? He definitely said that "Maybe I'll see you playing Ultimate..." Umm, he has never played. Which means he wants to invade my safe space to try to keep me as back burner girl.

Trust me. If this boy thinks he's ever going to get a shot with me now, he's going to have to W.O.R.K. F.O.R. I.T.

He can take a hike. You are WAY too good for him. What a jerkface.

If he invades your space, hit him with a frisbee!

 

[Brown.Eyed.Girl]

K...I might have called CV to see if he's free this week, and may have left a totally inane voicemail since he didn't pick up. This is what happens when people are busy and are not around to TALK ME OUT OF DOING STUPID THINGS!

 

[davi_el_mejor]

K...I might have called CV to see if he's free this week, and may have left a totally inane voicemail since he didn't pick up. This is what happens when people are busy and are not around to TALK ME OUT OF DOING STUPID THINGS!

I don't usually read this thread because I'm not single nor a lady, but it's late and I'm bored at work.

BEG your "inane" vxmail will (if CV is smart) find it endearing. Just don't leave a follow up vxmail explaining the previous one. Or a follow up to the follow up apologizing for follow up.

 

[Brown.Eyed.Girl]

K...I might have called CV to see if he's free this week, and may have left a totally inane voicemail since he didn't pick up. This is what happens when people are busy and are not around to TALK ME OUT OF DOING STUPID THINGS!

I don't usually read this thread because I'm not single nor a lady, but it's late and I'm bored at work.

BEG your "inane" vxmail will (if CV is smart) find it endearing. Just don't leave a follow up vxmail explaining the previous one. Or a follow up to the follow up apologizing for follow up.

Funny enough, my best friend used exactly the same word ("endearing"). I hope you both are right! (Btw, you don't have to be single or a lady to post - I made the thread, I can make up the rules right? Everyone is welcome).

And no more calling/voicemails for me - ball is back in his court, I am done!

 

[galeteia]

(Btw, you don't have to be single or a lady to post - I made the thread, I can make up the rules right? Everyone is welcome).

And no more calling/voicemails for me - ball is back in his court, I am done!

Well in THAT case ...

Princess,, if he ever has the poor sense to invade your Ultimate hobby, bean him RIGHT IN THE NOSE and then laugh at the thought of him explaining to his 'casual' gf how he ended up with a nose the size of a grapefruit. Nobody puts princess on the back burner!

He can just back up off the backup idea. Hmph!

 

[MsP]

K...I might have called CV to see if he's free this week, and may have left a totally inane voicemail since he didn't pick up. This is what happens when people are busy and are not around to TALK ME OUT OF DOING STUPID THINGS!

hahaha IMO, no harm done. If he's interested, I agree that he'll find it amusing, and if he's not, at least you tried.

BDG and I went out on Thursday and were planning for Saturday but we both agreed to reschedule. I had a long week and wasn't up for a full day of activity and he had work. Right now, we don't have anything planned as I'm heading out for the holiday. I did notice that he removed his online dating profile. I was kind of hoping we'd be able to get together before Thanksgiving but whatever.

We'll see-- probably not much developing anytime soon due to Thanksgiving, finals (we're both students), I'm vacationing in early December, Christmas, and then I'm vacationing again in early Jan. Busy, busy, busy. As usual.

BEG... let us know if he returns the call.

 

[Andelain]

Hi Andelain! I'm glad you stopped by and joined us! (I absolutely love your jewelry btw

I think it's good to discover more about yourself before committing to anything. I definitely don't have the life experiences that you do, but I found in my last relationship that it was really hard sometimes to keep a track of myself and what I wanted, versus what he wanted. It was all too easy to try to mold myself into what was ideal for him (which involved having a future that skipped from country to country, always on vacation, no kids, no family, no house), and that would have been a disaster for me. I know what you mean about rediscovering yourself before choosing a partner. I feel like for the last three years, I've been what a lot of other people have wanted me to be (the good daughter, the smart lawyer, the good girlfriend) and now I get to find out what I want to do and be. It's scary but invigorating!

How much longer will you be in Iraq? My dad is retired Air Force, but he has a serious cause of the traveling itch, so a few years after he retired, he got a job with a defense contractor. He's lived in Oman, Kuwait, Qatar, and Iraq. The year he was in Iraq was terrifying for my mom and I, and apparently very uncomfortable for him (he said he was living and working in tents in Baghdad). I remember one time I saw a news report about a suicide bomber in Baghdad and I freaked out, since I didn't know if that was in close proximity to where he was. I remember calling and e-mailing him, and it turns out he hadn't even realized there had been a suicide bombing. He's back in Oman now, and I'm so much happier.

I am sending you lots of safety vibes out there!

Thanks B.E.G, I love your’s too.

I had gotten my divorce many years ago, spent a couple years losing a battle with depression, but finally came out of that. I took some time to really think about why I chose someone like my EX, who was as dishonest and using as they come. All the signs were there before I married him, and everyone could see them but me. I lost several friends because of him. Then when I felt ready I ventured back out into the world of dating and relationships and met some nice guys, but nothing worked out for long. Then in the last few years a couple of events caused me to rethink everything I thought I knew. Major, life-changing events. So all those things I’d figured out about myself and what I wanted in a relationship aren’t necessarily true anymore. I’m just not sure now. That’s why I’m in no hurry to even think about jumping the broom anytime soon.

A bit of an oxymoron though, I just bought the diamond that will go into his ring if we do get hitched up. I found such a good deal I couldn’t pass it up, so I have it going in a pretty, but fairly inexpensive, ring for me to wear. Win-win situation as far as I’m concerned.

I’ve got around 7 more months on this tour, unless Uncle Sam extends it or shortens it. I’ve considered going back as a civilian after that, but there’s other problems that may prevent that. I’m really glad your dad got out of here OK. I’m just an admin type weenie, but have had to travel to different bases a few times. On those trips I’ve had my vehicle attacked by an IED, been shot at and have had rockets shot at the helicopter I was flying in. Plus the locals like to throw rockets and mortars at the base. So I thank you for all those safety vibes for all of us here.

 

[Brown.Eyed.Girl]

(Btw, you don't have to be single or a lady to post - I made the thread, I can make up the rules right? Everyone is welcome).

And no more calling/voicemails for me - ball is back in his court, I am done!

Well in THAT case ...

Princess,, if he ever has the poor sense to invade your Ultimate hobby, bean him RIGHT IN THE NOSE and then laugh at the thought of him explaining to his 'casual' gf how he ended up with a nose the size of a grapefruit. Nobody puts princess on the back burner!

He can just back up off the backup idea. Hmph!

K...I might have called CV to see if he's free this week, and may have left a totally inane voicemail since he didn't pick up. This is what happens when people are busy and are not around to TALK ME OUT OF DOING STUPID THINGS!

hahaha IMO, no harm done. If he's interested, I agree that he'll find it amusing, and if he's not, at least you tried.

BDG and I went out on Thursday and were planning for Saturday but we both agreed to reschedule. I had a long week and wasn't up for a full day of activity and he had work. Right now, we don't have anything planned as I'm heading out for the holiday. I did notice that he removed his online dating profile. I was kind of hoping we'd be able to get together before Thanksgiving but whatever.

We'll see-- probably not much developing anytime soon due to Thanksgiving, finals (we're both students), I'm vacationing in early December, Christmas, and then I'm vacationing again in early Jan. Busy, busy, busy. As usual.

BEG... let us know if he returns the call.

He called

I, unfortunately, missed the call.

Called him back, left a voicemail (oh the joys of phone tag, right?).

He called me back while he was headed home (he was out of town again) and we chatted for awhile; he's supposed to call me back later.

He is really hard to pin down (to make plans with). Like you, I doubt anything will happen this week because of the craziness of the holidays - booo. I'm thinking of inviting him along when my BFF, her husband and I go snowboarding some weekend.

Thanks B.E.G, I love your’s too.

I had gotten my divorce many years ago, spent a couple years losing a battle with depression, but finally came out of that. I took some time to really think about why I chose someone like my EX, who was as dishonest and using as they come. All the signs were there before I married him, and everyone could see them but me. I lost several friends because of him. Then when I felt ready I ventured back out into the world of dating and relationships and met some nice guys, but nothing worked out for long. Then in the last few years a couple of events caused me to rethink everything I thought I knew. Major, life-changing events. So all those things I’d figured out about myself and what I wanted in a relationship aren’t necessarily true anymore. I’m just not sure now. That’s why I’m in no hurry to even think about jumping the broom anytime soon.

A bit of an oxymoron though, I just bought the diamond that will go into his ring if we do get hitched up. I found such a good deal I couldn’t pass it up, so I have it going in a pretty, but fairly inexpensive, ring for me to wear. Win-win situation as far as I’m concerned.

I’ve got around 7 more months on this tour, unless Uncle Sam extends it or shortens it. I’ve considered going back as a civilian after that, but there’s other problems that may prevent that. I’m really glad your dad got out of here OK. I’m just an admin type weenie, but have had to travel to different bases a few times. On those trips I’ve had my vehicle attacked by an IED, been shot at and have had rockets shot at the helicopter I was flying in. Plus the locals like to throw rockets and mortars at the base. So I thank you for all those safety vibes for all of us here.

LOL Andelain - I love that you bought a diamond for him in case you guys did get married. I also love that you're going to wear it in the meantime

It's definitely good not to rush, I think, especially if you're reconfiguring/reaffirming what you want and need out of a relationship. It sounds like you've used each experience to learn and grow though, and that's always good. I know some people who NEVER learn, despite the same lessons happening again and again. It got very frustrating after a while, watching and wanting to help, but not being able to.

Eep, I'm glad you're not out on the front lines, but I know, based on what my dad has said and what you've written, that no job in Iraq is safe. So be careful, take care of yourself, and definitely sending safety vibes to all of you guys! That's terrifying what you've gone through - I really admire and respect you and all the other soldiers for being out there. Thank you.

So I do have to ask - how do you get your new sparklies over there??? Do you wait until you're home in the US, or do you get sparkly care packages?

 

[Strawdermangrl]

Princesss- W.T.F. What a 'd' word. Those brown eye guys...Good riddance. ughh.

B.E.G- hahahahahahahah- Love the insane vm. I have a rule, I don't leave them. Ever. LOL, my friends are all used to it now. I will fup with a text if someone doesn't answer because I tend to 1)ramble when I am nervous 2) For some reason my voice hits 'dog whistle' levels when I am leaving a boy a message 3) I hate leaving messages....So, there you go. CV will call. No worries.

MissP- I am sure that you will have time to chat or text or email. When you are both busy it is good, shows that he and you both have lives which means neither one can develop or expose the 'stage 5 clinger' virus.

So....yes....This weekend.



WAS AWESOME.

 

[princesss]

BEG - Has he called?

Stawder - YAY! I need details! Now. Kthnxbai.

Andlain - I'm a little late, but welcome! I know what you mean about re-evaluating what you want in a relationship (or if you want one), but probably not to the same degree. But the single life is a lot of fun (probably more fun when you're back Stateside, though...a little less dangerous, at least), and it's great to be able to just focus on yourself. Stay safe!

MissPru - Busy is good. Both of you have lives, which is awesome, even when it's frustrating sometimes. Imagine having a guy around that was ALWAYS available. You'd wonder what was wrong with him. But if he's busy and still trying to find time to see you, that's a really good thing.

 

[Strawdermangrl]

Princesss- Oh, the details. My mind is just pouring over all the stuff. LOL, I am OVER ANALYZING- everything. Please forgive the following length.....

We had a great drive up, 2.5 hrs and we talked about everything. Work, school, past relationships, what we wanted, what we don't want, families, kids, blah blah blah. We got to his friends house where I met his bff's wife for the first time- I instantly liked her. It was the 4 of us for dinner than then the show. The show was fantastic, I actually ran into someone from school that I hadn't seen in 10 years- random. It was a lot of fun. We went out to a few bars after and it was totally a great time. We all really meshed well together-which is important to me- getting along with my friends is key for someone I am dating- big part of it, he is the same way. He kissed me goodnight and we agreed we are both into each other and are going to see what happens. Yesterday when we were leaving his bff told me that I am always welcome at their home and I don't even have to bring HFF. LOL.

Drive back was fAST- we chatted and laughed. He dropped me off, walked me to the door, carried my bag- kissed me, gave me a big hug and thanked me for coming. I texted him a little later and thanked him again for everything (wouldn't let me pay for a thing all weekend) said I had a blast. He said it was no problem and he did,too. Haven't heard anything else from him, so we will see.

In the 2 hours I have been trying to get this done and posted,but the following probably would be best shared:

Our good mutual friend, who 'set' us up before, his wife and I are pretty good friends... We chatted a bit about trying to get together this week. I said 'I see HFF more than you all!!' We laughed and she said that we have a lot in common. I said that HFF told me that her hubby had recommended that HFF invite me to this concert this weekend and her response was 'so he is behind all of this'. I said 'I guess, I like to think that HFF is a little, too.' She said 'i would say HFF always needs a lil shove..its like he wants to do things but he is resistant. i dont know..hes a good guy'. They are having a party in a few weeks, I was telling her I might be a tad late getting there if I can make it and she said 'no worries, HFF will be here probably talking about you so you will be here anyway'.

 

[princesss]

Ooh! That sounds fantastic. I'm so glad you had fun and things clicked so well!

 

[Brown.Eyed.Girl]

Princesss- Oh, the details. My mind is just pouring over all the stuff. LOL, I am OVER ANALYZING- everything. Please forgive the following length.....

We had a great drive up, 2.5 hrs and we talked about everything. Work, school, past relationships, what we wanted, what we don't want, families, kids, blah blah blah. We got to his friends house where I met his bff's wife for the first time- I instantly liked her. It was the 4 of us for dinner than then the show. The show was fantastic, I actually ran into someone from school that I hadn't seen in 10 years- random. It was a lot of fun. We went out to a few bars after and it was totally a great time. We all really meshed well together-which is important to me- getting along with my friends is key for someone I am dating- big part of it, he is the same way. He kissed me goodnight and we agreed we are both into each other and are going to see what happens. Yesterday when we were leaving his bff told me that I am always welcome at their home and I don't even have to bring HFF. LOL.

Drive back was fAST- we chatted and laughed. He dropped me off, walked me to the door, carried my bag- kissed me, gave me a big hug and thanked me for coming. I texted him a little later and thanked him again for everything (wouldn't let me pay for a thing all weekend) said I had a blast. He said it was no problem and he did,too. Haven't heard anything else from him, so we will see.

In the 2 hours I have been trying to get this done and posted,but the following probably would be best shared:

Our good mutual friend, who 'set' us up before, his wife and I are pretty good friends... We chatted a bit about trying to get together this week. I said 'I see HFF more than you all!!' We laughed and she said that we have a lot in common. I said that HFF told me that her hubby had recommended that HFF invite me to this concert this weekend and her response was 'so he is behind all of this'. I said 'I guess, I like to think that HFF is a little, too.' She said 'i would say HFF always needs a lil shove..its like he wants to do things but he is resistant. i dont know..hes a good guy'. They are having a party in a few weeks, I was telling her I might be a tad late getting there if I can make it and she said 'no worries, HFF will be here probably talking about you so you will be here anyway'.

Sorry, I'm late getting back to this thread but Strawder, yay!!!

It sounds like you had a fantastic time and you and HFF really clicked! So when are you seeing him next?

 

[Brown.Eyed.Girl]

BEG - Has he called?

Stawder - YAY! I need details! Now. Kthnxbai.

Andlain - I'm a little late, but welcome! I know what you mean about re-evaluating what you want in a relationship (or if you want one), but probably not to the same degree. But the single life is a lot of fun (probably more fun when you're back Stateside, though...a little less dangerous, at least), and it's great to be able to just focus on yourself. Stay safe!

MissPru - Busy is good. Both of you have lives, which is awesome, even when it's frustrating sometimes. Imagine having a guy around that was ALWAYS available. You'd wonder what was wrong with him. But if he's busy and still trying to find time to see you, that's a really good thing.

He texted me yesterday (he had an errand out of time), but I was at the gym. Saw his text (as he was on his way out of the city) when I was going to dinner, and he and I texted for the next couple hours. Which, I'm sure was not the safest thing, since he was texting while driving on icy roads out of the city We tentatively made plans to go snowboarding next weekend (with my friends too). Unfortunately, he's busy this weekend (but that's good, because I'm going for the first time this weekend and it's going to be both really embarrassing and painful).

I'm usually a really fast responder when it comes to texts but I wasn't last night since I was at dinner (and texting at dinner was ok - my BFF and her husband are very invested in this, lol, since he's THEIR vet as well). And it was cute - when I didn't respond he'd send another random text, lol. Things got a little flirty at the end and I left it on a good note. So slow progress, but progress

In other news, a while back (like a year ago) I submitted my resume just in case to this agency that places lateral attorneys (i.e. mid to senior associates wanting to change firms), just on the off chance something might occur. Well, no news...until earlier today. There's an opening for a first year with a top international firm - am I interested and would I send a resume? I'm like - well CRAP. What's with all these law openings RIGHT AFTER I decide I don't want to be a lawyer????

I know it's not bad news, and it would get me working asap and making money. But, I'm really worried that once I start making a great salary, I won't ever leave to become a student again (to get my Masters in Education) and then take a HUGE pay cut to be a teacher. And I really don't want to be an attorney. I feel really torn.

 

[galeteia]

In other news, a while back (like a year ago) I submitted my resume just in case to this agency that places lateral attorneys (i.e. mid to senior associates wanting to change firms), just on the off chance something might occur. Well, no news...until earlier today. There's an opening for a first year with a top international firm - am I interested and would I send a resume? I'm like - well CRAP. What's with all these law openings RIGHT AFTER I decide I don't want to be a lawyer????

I know it's not bad news, and it would get me working asap and making money. But, I'm really worried that once I start making a great salary, I won't ever leave to become a student again (to get my Masters in Education) and then take a HUGE pay cut to be a teacher. And I really don't want to be an attorney. I feel really torn.

Could you work for a few years and make a lot of $$$ and sock away enough to buffer the sticker shock of pursuing something you love? Could you commit to say, 5 years, and hold onto that to get you through?

 

[Brown.Eyed.Girl]

In other news, a while back (like a year ago) I submitted my resume just in case to this agency that places lateral attorneys (i.e. mid to senior associates wanting to change firms), just on the off chance something might occur. Well, no news...until earlier today. There's an opening for a first year with a top international firm - am I interested and would I send a resume? I'm like - well CRAP. What's with all these law openings RIGHT AFTER I decide I don't want to be a lawyer????

I know it's not bad news, and it would get me working asap and making money. But, I'm really worried that once I start making a great salary, I won't ever leave to become a student again (to get my Masters in Education) and then take a HUGE pay cut to be a teacher. And I really don't want to be an attorney. I feel really torn.

Could you work for a few years and make a lot of $$$ and sock away enough to buffer the sticker shock of pursuing something you love? Could you commit to say, 5 years, and hold onto that to get you through?

Well, that was honestly my attitude going into law school. Stick it out for a few years, pay my dues, get out.

Honestly, I don't want to do it anymore. I've realized in the last year how important it is to be happy with the work you're doing, and I was REALLY unhappy even during the summer job.

Plus, I'm hoping to work in lower-income schools for five years, and public education for another five, which will forgive my loans. So money isn't quite as big an issue (what with cost of living, etc. in DC/any major metro area) because if I do law, I'll have to pay back ALL of my debt, and it would take...a while. Even with Biglaw salary. And I have NO idea what the base salary for this firm is anyway - it could be significantly less than DC market.

 

[Andelain]

Thank you, princesss!

LOL Andelain - I love that you bought a diamond for him in case you guys did get married. I also love that you're going to wear it in the meantime

It's definitely good not to rush, I think, especially if you're reconfiguring/reaffirming what you want and need out of a relationship. It sounds like you've used each experience to learn and grow though, and that's always good. I know some people who NEVER learn, despite the same lessons happening again and again. It got very frustrating after a while, watching and wanting to help, but not being able to.

Eep, I'm glad you're not out on the front lines, but I know, based on what my dad has said and what you've written, that no job in Iraq is safe. So be careful, take care of yourself, and definitely sending safety vibes to all of you guys! That's terrifying what you've gone through - I really admire and respect you and all the other soldiers for being out there. Thank you.

So I do have to ask - how do you get your new sparklies over there??? Do you wait until you're home in the US, or do you get sparkly care packages?

Well, a little bad news in that the diamond project for my guy crashed and burned today. The stone had a feather that would have been completely hidden, but was found to be too frail to be put under metal. Oh well, I was just jumping on an opportunity there.

I really can't say I've used each opportunity to learn from, because I really haven't and at times have paid a heavy price for that. I think this time around I've been forced to take a step back and rethink because right now I really don't know myself in ways I have in the past. Some of the changes are that drastic and sudden. Some days I think about my guy and have no idea how I really feel about him, other days I just know and am comfortable with it. I've been working with a counselor on the underlying problems and he thinks I'm right where I should be for the amount of time that has passed, and he's glad I have no desire to rush this time. He's actually a little surprised I'm in a relationship at all, especially being deployed.

You're very welcome and thank you for that. Keep those safety vibes coming, we all need them. As for my sparklies, registered mail is my friend. So far all the vendors I've worked with have been willing to send that way. I just can't wear some of it in uniform, like my pendant or my dangly earrings.

 

[Brown.Eyed.Girl]

Thank you, princesss!

LOL Andelain - I love that you bought a diamond for him in case you guys did get married. I also love that you're going to wear it in the meantime

It's definitely good not to rush, I think, especially if you're reconfiguring/reaffirming what you want and need out of a relationship. It sounds like you've used each experience to learn and grow though, and that's always good. I know some people who NEVER learn, despite the same lessons happening again and again. It got very frustrating after a while, watching and wanting to help, but not being able to.

Eep, I'm glad you're not out on the front lines, but I know, based on what my dad has said and what you've written, that no job in Iraq is safe. So be careful, take care of yourself, and definitely sending safety vibes to all of you guys! That's terrifying what you've gone through - I really admire and respect you and all the other soldiers for being out there. Thank you.

So I do have to ask - how do you get your new sparklies over there??? Do you wait until you're home in the US, or do you get sparkly care packages?

Well, a little bad news in that the diamond project for my guy crashed and burned today. The stone had a feather that would have been completely hidden, but was found to be too frail to be put under metal. Oh well, I was just jumping on an opportunity there.

I really can't say I've used each opportunity to learn from, because I really haven't and at times have paid a heavy price for that. I think this time around I've been forced to take a step back and rethink because right now I really don't know myself in ways I have in the past. Some of the changes are that drastic and sudden. Some days I think about my guy and have no idea how I really feel about him, other days I just know and am comfortable with it. I've been working with a counselor on the underlying problems and he thinks I'm right where I should be for the amount of time that has passed, and he's glad I have no desire to rush this time. He's actually a little surprised I'm in a relationship at all, especially being deployed.

You're very welcome and thank you for that. Keep those safety vibes coming, we all need them. As for my sparklies, registered mail is my friend. So far all the vendors I've worked with have been willing to send that way. I just can't wear some of it in uniform, like my pendant or my dangly earrings.

That's awesome that you can get your sparklies there! What do your fellow soldiers think of your jewelry addiction? My law school friends thought I was crazy

I'm really sorry to hear about the diamond's feather! Darn. Hopefully a better one will come along soon. Are you and your guy long distance?

In other news, talked with CV for 2 hours last night, went to dinner with him tonight, and I made the first move and kissed him. Things went well

 

[MsP]

In other news, talked with CV for 2 hours last night, went to dinner with him tonight, and I made the first move and kissed him. Things went well

Bravo bravoooooo

BDG and I haven't really done much-- he's had finals and then the holiday. We've chatted on the phone and texted and we're supposed to be going out tonight. I have a feeling he's going to bail though. So my expectations are fairly low.

On another front, I had a lovely Friday out with a previous potential suitor turned nice friend. We chatted for hours, had some great food, whatever. I'm trying to set him up with someone. He's not being too cooperative.

What is the policy on going out with and chatting to other men while "really early dating ie BDG" type guys? I feel like it's fine but then again I don't really want to tell him about it. So that seems to make it wrong... Whatever.

I just can't take this dating thing too seriously. I used to be a little nervous about dates but now I'm like, "Dinner? Drinks? Hiking? Suuuuuuure!" I mean, I haven't got a thing to lose. At some point this feeling will likely change but I'm still young and being attached isn't a huge goal right now.

How are the other single ladies doing?! Survive the holiday?

 

[princesss]

Miss Pru, I don't think you're obligated to tell the guys that you're seeing other people. Once you have the exclusivity talk with BDG (or the other guy), then you've got to cut things off with whoever else you're seeing, but up until then you're free to see as many guys as you want.

Go BEG, kissing CV! Awesome!

I had a really relaxing Thanksgiving. Went to the mountains with some friends and just relaxed and ate good food. No stress, no worries, just a very comfortable, happy holiday.

I was playing ultimate yesterday and one of the guys asked if my ex, M, had moved to VA yet. I said that he's been there for two weeks, and he said, "Oh, cool. Are you going to be joining him anytime soon?" I love that ultimate players here aren't gossipy, but dang - 4 months and I'm STILL having to break the news to people!

 

[Strawdermangrl]

MissP- I second Princesss' statement.

B.E.G- Squeeaaallll!!!! You go, girl.

So, HFF and I are..well, I am not sure. We are going out tomorrow night so I am going to have a chat with him being that we haven't really talked, at all, and sporadic texting isn't really 'ok' with me. LOL, not that texting isn't acceptable, but I demand more than that. Maybe that is why I am posting here. LOL, who knows.

 

[MsP]

MissP- I second Princesss' statement.

B.E.G- Squeeaaallll!!!! You go, girl.

So, HFF and I are..well, I am not sure. We are going out tomorrow night so I am going to have a chat with him being that we haven't really talked, at all, and sporadic texting isn't really 'ok' with me. LOL, not that texting isn't acceptable, but I demand more than that. Maybe that is why I am posting here. LOL, who knows.

...agreed.

I text if I need to let someone know that I'm on my way, or what time a movie is, or something relatively short and sweet. But what is it with these men wanting to have 20 text back-and-forth conversations in one evening?! I think they're afraid of the "call commitment" or something. Geez.

Where are you going out? Dinner/drinks? or something more adventurous?




BDG ended up texting me that he was really too busy to get together. Annoying. And I ended up calling another one of my prospects and we went out for a beer and shopped for holiday decorations. haha.

 

[star sparkle]

MissPru--I third what princesss said. Prior to me dating BF (I know, I know, I'm not single, but B.E.G. said you didn't have to be to post on this thread! , I was seeing a bunch of different guys at once and didn't feel the need to tell anyone about anyone else. I also just figured they were all probably doing the same as I was. Once I met and started dating BF, everyone else fell by the wayside.

Straw--Agreed about the texting. It may seem kinda silly, but that's one of the things that made BF rise to the top of the heap. He would text me, of course, but he also CALLED! And on a regular basis! And without me hinting that I wanted him to call! And without having to set up a "date" to talk on the phone! Oh, the novelty!