Single Ladies Small Talk

[MsP]

I HATE being single. Or rather, I hate being single here in my tiny little hometown, and trust me, I cannot wait to move to CA where there is actually a dating scene.

I mean, it's nice in that hey, good to find myself again, I did a lot of new things this year (not the least of which was learning how to ask a guy out, lol!), and I'm still young, but damn it! I hate being single! And it's not even like I can start something here...one, availability, and two, I'm moving! Pout.

I can see how being single in a small town could be a downer but you're soon to be moving...and I think grad school is an easy place to socialize casually and 'date'. I think this "in the meantime" phase you should just enjoy life and yourself. You sound like you're doing quite well though. Are the students in your Master's program adult students? or coming right from college? or do you not know...

I don't think I realized how much time relationships take-- when I became single I was like, "oh I have so much time!" and was able to go to classes at the gym, long rides on the weekend, casual talks/meetups at the college, etc. Now I feel like I'm racing around in life again. Not bad, not great, just something I've consciously noted. I'm going on vacation next week and I only invited the SO down for part of it. I want some "me time" to read, go to the spa, etc.

 

[MsP]

So, what I didn't tell you was that the Match thing did result in one phone conversation, and Match Boy has been texting me on and off. Just kind of joking around, chatting a bit. Our phone convo was really good, very comfortable and easy. My friends and I have been calling him "Emmy" because...well...he has one.

WHO HAS AN EMMY?!?!?!?!

Scandalous... an emmy? Match has some unique people... in a good way and bad. hahaha

 

[MsP]

MissPru - Oooh do tell about new guy! It sounds like it's getting serious! Yay! And thanks! And no, CYG is not fun at all. It's gotten to the point where my yoga instructor and I might be staging a conversation tomorrow to ward him off (i.e. BEG now has a fake boyfriend....)

I recall back in this thread I posed the question of education and it's funny because this guy is pretty much the opposite of me in that regard. Isn't a PhD, not a lawyer, no doctor... didn't even go to college. Yet he's very well spoken, traveled the world, has a strong moral base, quite successful in what he does. We have some "value differences"-- I'm fairly frugal and he's all about valuing his time. We were sitting next to eachother one day in a waiting room, chatted a bit, jokingly exchanged business cards and then made contact days later-- and viola! Here we are.

 

[princesss]

Aww, MissPru, that's fun! Love when random connections like that turn out well.

Strawder....not too many details to give at the moment. 27/28, says he's 6'2" (I have yet to confirm or deny), and a quick date with my friend Mr. Google shows that he got an Emmy for editing a show on PBS. He does some kind of product development/marketing thing (right now he's busy shooting some video with a Canon 7D? 70D?). He runs, he's from this city, and he's easy to talk to. That's all I've got.

 

[Brown.Eyed.Girl]

Princesss - Um, an Emmy?!?! Who is this guy? And is he cute??

Strawder (it's really hard to resist the temptation to just call you by your real name, lol) - awww. You're not dreaming!!! Btw, have any of you seen Waking Life? It was one of the movies my English class in high school made us watch when studying existentialism - it's trippy. (NOT showing that movie when I'm teaching English - it gave me a headache).

MissPru - Funny how things like that work out! But you know, considering the total asses I've met in the field of law who are extremely well-educated, etc., I think it's FAR more important to have a guy who has the qualities you describe in yours, even if he doesn't have the most degrees in the room, you know? I can't remember exactly what I wrote back then, but I care less about degrees than whether he can have a conversation or debate with me. Let's face it - odds are 1) I'll probably be more educated than most guys I may meet (BA, JD, M.Ed, and I'll probably eventually go for an MPP); 2) I'll probably be better traveled; and 3) cultured. At least if I meet anyone here, lol. So it's one of those - I can't and shouldn't prelimit my own selection I guess by imposing criteria that may backfire on me later... right? I think I'm rambling, I'll shut up!

Btw, to answer your question - I think I am not going near the dating pool in my class next year. For one, i'm in an education program and there aren't that many guys to begin with, and two, the program is SMALL. I was telling some friends about the drama that's been going on amongst the ski instructors at my hill (I have a crush on a couple of them) which is also a very small group, and it's an excellent reminder that I should take my dating business far far away from campus come June

 

[Strawdermangrl]

Aww, MissPru, that's fun! Love when random connections like that turn out well.

Strawder....not too many details to give at the moment. 27/28, says he's 6'2" (I have yet to confirm or deny), and a quick date with my friend Mr. Google shows that he got an Emmy for editing a show on PBS. He does some kind of product development/marketing thing (right now he's busy shooting some video with a Canon 7D? 70D?). He runs, he's from this city, and he's easy to talk to. That's all I've got.

Hmmm...ok, waiting to hear back. When is date night in the flesh? When he is done with this shoot? Interesting. We will have to chat...

B.E.G- Shucks, thanks girly. I know you are going to find something wonderful in Cali. I just FEEL it. I need to check out this movie tonight...I have to avoid a 'jeans' party at the house, so this will create the perfect diversion. xx. You can call me Renee. Its cool.

 

[Brown.Eyed.Girl]

Aww, MissPru, that's fun! Love when random connections like that turn out well.

Strawder....not too many details to give at the moment. 27/28, says he's 6'2" (I have yet to confirm or deny), and a quick date with my friend Mr. Google shows that he got an Emmy for editing a show on PBS. He does some kind of product development/marketing thing (right now he's busy shooting some video with a Canon 7D? 70D?). He runs, he's from this city, and he's easy to talk to. That's all I've got.

Hmmm...ok, waiting to hear back. When is date night in the flesh? When he is done with this shoot? Interesting. We will have to chat...

B.E.G- Shucks, thanks girly. I know you are going to find something wonderful in Cali. I just FEEL it. I need to check out this movie tonight...I have to avoid a 'jeans' party at the house, so this will create the perfect diversion. xx. You can call me Renee. Its cool.

What is this jeans party??

And I certainly hope so about finding someone in Cali, as I intend to stay there and never come back to Montana! (other than to visit). Of course, whoever it is better be down with skiing every weekend

Princesss - deets! So when do you meet him in person?

 

[Strawdermangrl]

Aww, MissPru, that's fun! Love when random connections like that turn out well.

Strawder....not too many details to give at the moment. 27/28, says he's 6'2" (I have yet to confirm or deny), and a quick date with my friend Mr. Google shows that he got an Emmy for editing a show on PBS. He does some kind of product development/marketing thing (right now he's busy shooting some video with a Canon 7D? 70D?). He runs, he's from this city, and he's easy to talk to. That's all I've got.

Hmmm...ok, waiting to hear back. When is date night in the flesh? When he is done with this shoot? Interesting. We will have to chat...

B.E.G- Shucks, thanks girly. I know you are going to find something wonderful in Cali. I just FEEL it. I need to check out this movie tonight...I have to avoid a 'jeans' party at the house, so this will create the perfect diversion. xx. You can call me Renee. Its cool.

What is this jeans party??

And I certainly hope so about finding someone in Cali, as I intend to stay there and never come back to Montana! (other than to visit). Of course, whoever it is better be down with skiing every weekend

Princesss - deets! So when do you meet him in person?

It is this company called 'vault' or something like that. They get designer jeans and they are super cheap. Not sure *how* it all works, but it was ok. They had some great 7's and some firehouse? or something jeans for like 50 bucks. But they are the real deal and pretty cute. So yeah. That was me. Drinking wine while the women ran through the house digging for jeans. It was cool.

 

[princesss]

So I think he was finally going to ask me to meet in person, but my phone hates me and not sure that's going to happen.

Wedneday night we were chatting, and he went for a run. He came back and asked what my normal after work routine was. I was replying and my phone straight up died. Powered down and wouldn't power back up. Of course I was ages away from my charger, and didn't get to it until 11. Obviously wasn't going to text him at 11, so I waited until yesterday. Haven't heard from him since. Not that we texted every day to begin with, but I feel like maybe I annoyed him. Oops. Soooooo....not counting on Emmy to work out! Not like it would have been anything serious, so I'm not terribly upset.

Going to a golf/tennis theme party tonight. It's a fundraiser for CF, so I'm excited about it for two reasons (I have an unreasonable love for theme parties).

 

[GamerGirl]

Hi Ladies!

I'm just about to turn 35 and newly single - definitely not ready to start dating and probably won't be for a few months at the very least - but came across this thread and LOVE it. What better way to get myself ready to get back out there than to read all your fabulous stories. Hopefully I'll have a few stories of my own eventually. Right now I'm just trying to take a step back from being in a relationship, figuring out what I really want and trying to splurge on ME for a while.

Living with my mom for now - not ideal but not horrible (yet!) - next month I think I will begin the search for apartment or condo.Not sure if I have enough saved to buy a condo (too scared of the responsibility to buy a house by myself in a location where we have tons of snow and other fun weather things that make outdoor maintenance a huge task) -- and I'm not 100% sure I know where exactly I want to move to yet so I don't know if I want to put all the money down to purchase before I am sure. On the other hand I also don't want to throw away money on rent either. I guess I have plenty of time to figure it out

Hope you don't mind me jumping on in the thread

 

[princesss]

Welcome, GG! Of course we don't mind you jumping in.

Sorry to hear about the new-found single status, but it really is fun being single! It just takes a little adjustment.


Oh, okay, so how's this for awkward? Next weekend I'm going to DC to hang out with friends and I know I'm going to run into ex-BF. How do I know this? Because we're kind of planning on it (long story, and since giving too much away will really pinpoint where to find me, I don't want to put it all over the interwebs). Well, I mentioned that I'm driving up Friday since I don't have any place to stay on Thursday and he offered to find me a couch to crash on. Now, part of me is tempted because the more time I get up there, the better. But the sane part of me says "Uhh, no way." Which is too bad, because I really don't feel like leaving at 7 on a Friday morning to drive 6 hours when I know I could be almost there Thursday night and only have a 2 hour drive. Grrrrr.

 

[Strawdermangrl]

Welcome, GG! Of course we don't mind you jumping in.

Sorry to hear about the new-found single status, but it really is fun being single! It just takes a little adjustment.


Oh, okay, so how's this for awkward? Next weekend I'm going to DC to hang out with friends and I know I'm going to run into ex-BF. How do I know this? Because we're kind of planning on it (long story, and since giving too much away will really pinpoint where to find me, I don't want to put it all over the interwebs). Well, I mentioned that I'm driving up Friday since I don't have any place to stay on Thursday and he offered to find me a couch to crash on. Now, part of me is tempted because the more time I get up there, the better. But the sane part of me says "Uhh, no way." Which is too bad, because I really don't feel like leaving at 7 on a Friday morning to drive 6 hours when I know I could be almost there Thursday night and only have a 2 hour drive. Grrrrr.

Welcome, GG!!!

Princesss- I have A TON of friends that would open a couch for you in a heartbeat. Seriously, go up Thursday and I will get you hooked up with some of them.

 

[princesss]

Welcome, GG! Of course we don't mind you jumping in.

Sorry to hear about the new-found single status, but it really is fun being single! It just takes a little adjustment.


Oh, okay, so how's this for awkward? Next weekend I'm going to DC to hang out with friends and I know I'm going to run into ex-BF. How do I know this? Because we're kind of planning on it (long story, and since giving too much away will really pinpoint where to find me, I don't want to put it all over the interwebs). Well, I mentioned that I'm driving up Friday since I don't have any place to stay on Thursday and he offered to find me a couch to crash on. Now, part of me is tempted because the more time I get up there, the better. But the sane part of me says "Uhh, no way." Which is too bad, because I really don't feel like leaving at 7 on a Friday morning to drive 6 hours when I know I could be almost there Thursday night and only have a 2 hour drive. Grrrrr.

Welcome, GG!!!

Princesss- I have A TON of friends that would open a couch for you in a heartbeat. Seriously, go up Thursday and I will get you hooked up with some of them.

If I was going to get there at a decent hour, I would. But I won't get in until nearly midnight, which is what makes it complicated.

 

[princesss]

So I had a date with Emmy last night. It was okay. Nothing special. No spark. But he's a fun guy and if he ever wanted to just hang out in a non-date way I'd be down for it. But....no. Definitely not my type. And if I had to guess, I'd say I'm not his type, either.

 

[iLander]

So I had a date with Emmy last night. It was okay. Nothing special. No spark. But he's a fun guy and if he ever wanted to just hang out in a non-date way I'd be down for it. But....no. Definitely not my type. And if I had to guess, I'd say I'm not his type, either.

I really have no business poking my head in here, because I'm an old married lady, but I'm doing it anyway

My DH and I have been married for 27 ridiculously happy years. He didn't seem like my type until the third date. . .

Just sayin' . . .

 

[princesss]

Yeah....but I'm going to go out on a limb and say at the end of your first date you were pretty confident that your DH was attracted to women.

 

[iLander]

Yeah....but I'm going to go out on a limb and say at the end of your first date you were pretty confident that your DH was attracted to women.

Um . . yeah. . . you got me there . . .

Why did he even bother going out with a girl then?

People are so weird . . .

 

[Erin]

This looks like a good place to jump back in!

Couldn't very well go back to LIW because I'm not dating anyone. I do like the new PS format and I look forward to finding my friends again. There is one boy I have my eye on, but that's for another story. I've enjoyed reading the Single Ladies stories. It reminds me that men just really are...... weird.

I look forward to catching up quickly!

 

[princesss]

Welcome back, Starset!

And yes, men are weird. Very, very weird.

 

[GamerGirl]

Yeah....but I'm going to go out on a limb and say at the end of your first date you were pretty confident that your DH was attracted to women.

wow - that's pretty crazy. At least you weren't into him either

I may have gotten a hook-up for a realtor that specializes in getting folks into foreclosure properties - so my decision on whether to rent an apart or buy a condo just got a little more complicated. I'm still leaning a tiny bit toward renting - cause the flexibility is there in case I decide I don't like the location or want something different after I've lived in a space for a while -- but there is something to actually OWNING the place you live and being able to make changes as you see fit. I've got some interesting choices to make in the near future I think!

 

[Brown.Eyed.Girl]

Princesss - Aww about Emmy. But um yeah, if you're getting the swinging for the other team vibes, that's not good. I still remember that guy from my law class last spring (he was cross-registered since he was in the business school) who was sooooo gorgeous, and so gay. I was very bitterly disappointed about that! But WHY would he go on a date with you if he wasn't interested in the female gender??

iLander - you are more than welcome to hang with us!

Hi Starset! Welcome back!

GamerGirl - welcome! And it's great that you're taking some time for yourself - something we all should do more often, I bet Sorry to hear about the recent singledom but what a scary but exciting time for you! I hear ya on the responsibility of owning a house. I'm living with my mom right now too and just maintenance stuff (I'm in a heavy snow area) and shoveling sidewalks (shudder) and heater going out and getting it fixed and all the assorted crap that goes with the freedom of a house is a bit terrifying (but I am the girl who will call maintenance to fix my clogged sink in my apt!).

Still nothing new for me, other than my deep abiding crushes on a couple ski instructors. One is just the nicest guy, love his personality, not super hot or anything special in looks but a great guy. The other one is HOT. Like, wow. And also newly single I believe (after a very brief relationship with another ski instructor). Alas, neither of them live in my town and ski season is almost over and I'm moving soon..... gah, dating scene here REALLY sucks!

In other news - I formally accepted my offer at Stanford for next year! So looking forward to moving out to the Bay Area this summer

 

[MsP]

I may have gotten a hook-up for a realtor that specializes in getting folks into foreclosure properties - so my decision on whether to rent an apart or buy a condo just got a little more complicated. I'm still leaning a tiny bit toward renting - cause the flexibility is there in case I decide I don't like the location or want something different after I've lived in a space for a while -- but there is something to actually OWNING the place you live and being able to make changes as you see fit. I've got some interesting choices to make in the near future I think!

Have you lived in the area? or know the area quite well?... I'd probably rent for a while to decide on which neighborhood or complex I feel most connected with and which is closest to areas I find out I frequent. Can you do a short term rental while you shop around for a condo? I guess I just hate being rushed so I'd try to buy myself some time. Sounds exciting!

 

[MsP]

And yes, men are weird. Very, very weird.

Agreed.

I found out my father has now said numerous times(behind my back) that this current relationship I am in won't last and I'm only using him. Um.... OUCH! I'm unsure what to do. Makes me think, "Is there something I'm missing here?" I think my father is intimidated, to be honest.

 

[Strawdermangrl]

Princesss- I just love you. Emmy=Fail.

Star!!! HI!!!

Ok, girls. I has BIG news.

T-minus 3 weeks, I am moving to Australia to be with sweet boy from Australia. We need to come up with nickname for him. Thoughts?

I can't believe I am doing it but I have to say, when you KNOW, you KNOW.

Best part? I get to keep working same job over there. Can you say awesome!?!!??!?!

 

[GamerGirl]

Have you lived in the area? or know the area quite well?... I'd probably rent for a while to decide on which neighborhood or complex I feel most connected with and which is closest to areas I find out I frequent. Can you do a short term rental while you shop around for a condo? I guess I just hate being rushed so I'd try to buy myself some time. Sounds exciting!

Yeah - I live here now, just there are a ton of neighborhoods to look at and without having actually lived in some of them it is hard to judge what will be the best fit. I'm definitely considering renting while I look for a condo -- my friend spoke to the realtor and told her that I wasn't sure if I was going to buy or rent and the realtor said that I should contact her anyway cause she can at least set up an auto-search for me that forwards any properties that fits the requirements I give her. Plus, the more I think about it - I'm wondering if I'm not trying to push the buying a condo things to try and fast foward myself past this "adjusting to being newly single" phase. So renting might be a better option till I've got myself sorted a bit more. If I'm able to find a decent place to rent for cheap enough I can still be saving some money and have a better downpayment when the time to buy rolls around.

 

[GamerGirl]

Princesss- I just love you. Emmy=Fail.

Star!!! HI!!!

Ok, girls. I has BIG news.

T-minus 3 weeks, I am moving to Australia to be with sweet boy from Australia. We need to come up with nickname for him. Thoughts?

I can't believe I am doing it but I have to say, when you KNOW, you KNOW.

Best part? I get to keep working same job over there. Can you say awesome!?!!??!?!

Wow - that is some exciting news - congrats!!

 

[zoebartlett]

I lurk here but I wanted to say, Strawder...uh, Renee, wow, that's BIG news! It's awesome that you get to keep your job too.

 

[princesss]

I'm a huge believer in not making huge choices while in heightened emotional states - I vote rent for now, buy later!

 

[Strawdermangrl]

I lurk here but I wanted to say, Strawder...uh, Renee, wow, that's BIG news! It's awesome that you get to keep your job too.

LOL, Thanks Zoe!! I am SUPER excited.

I agree with Princesss- totally.

 

[GamerGirl]

I'm a huge believer in not making huge choices while in heightened emotional states - I vote rent for now, buy later!

Agreed - the more I think about it the more sense renting makes right now. Plus, it will allow me to splurge a little more on ME - which I am looking forward to as well I didn't think that I would be ready to move out to my own place by myself so soon, but I'm kind of itching to get my own place suddenly! Started emailed a couple of places last night and hopefully I'll get some tours set up this week!

Went out for a fun happy hour on Friday - girls only - and met another single gal. She is way younger than me I am guessing (well, since she came with my friend who is 6 years younger than me I would guess she is that same age or maybe a bit younger) but she seemed cool and offered to go to "single events" with me when I was ready. She mentioned it a couple of times throughout the evening so it looks like I could maybe have a local "partner in crime" when I am ready to get back out there. I've only got 3 other local girlfriends and they are all married or soon-to-be married so it was nice to meet someone new who is a little closer to my own situation She told me that some study found that our city is supposedly one of the best cities for single people who want to date and then (eventually) get married

We are actually starting to get a tiny bit closer to actual Spring weather here -- I was able to run outside 4 times last week! It's supposed to rain almost everyday this week so I may be stuck on the treadmill (why is it SOOO much harder to run on a treadmill?? for whatever reason I just suck at it).

Hope everyone had a great weekend