The Official TTC Thread!

[fisherofmengirly]

Thanks for the information, ladies!

I''ve not talked extensively about it with Paul (mostly because I''m lame and know nothing about Canada other than it''s to the north and is HUGE and PEI is there), but I think he''d been thinking about us driving up, since we have friends in NY we were going to stop in and see, too. That''s why I think we wouldn''t be going very far into Canada. When we went to Niagra Falls, I saw the transition area from one country to the other. If we went there, where would that be? Haha. Paul is going to laugh his butt off if he ever comes to this thread and reads this. He knows all about geography and the distribution of cities, but I have no clue.

We''re kind of debating over the "babymoon" we''d like to take this summer (how''s that for hopeful thinking?!

) and it seems to be either a trip to Canada (where ever that means!) or a short cruise to the bahamas. I''m not a fan of water, but Paul''s been wanting to go for so many years now, I feel like I''m being selfish not giving in. And a short cruise couldn''t be that bad, right? And I''ve been looking at prices and they''re not all that high right now, especially if you don''t get one of the premo suites, and we''re not fancy, we don''t need fancy. (Although, I don''t want the bunkbed rooms I''ve heard horror stories about).

I hope to one day have a little girl who falls in love with Anne Shirley as much as I did as a child; it''d be fun to visit PEI with her, but I wanna see it *now,* too.

***
Can I have an ARGH moment here at my dear husband?

I told him last year when we were doing taxes that he needed to change his forms at work so that they would take out MORE money each paycheck, so we''d not be paying at tax return time. He said, "Okay, Jen." Did he do it? No. Do we get money back? No. We just barely owe money, but dang, it''s his fault! He makes a considerable amount more than I do (he''s been a teacher longer than I''ve been with the state, and he has a higher degree than I do), and I''ve had a considerably higher amount of taxes witheld throughout the year. Argh! I was hoping we''d get back something; I wanted to put it in the baby fund.

Is it silly that we have a baby fund when there''s not yet a baby?

Okay, rant over.... off to look at a map of Canada....

 

[Dreamer_D]

Fisher If you crossed at Niagara fall that is southern Ontario. Actually, it is the niagara peninsula, which is wine country and a very nice place to visit if you wanted to stay in lovel B&Bs and go on wine tours etc. If you cross closer to the east coase and NY, then Montreal is very close. So both are driving distance. PEI and Vancouver, not so much!

 

[Clairitek]

Date: 3/30/2009 3:45:49 PM
Author: fisherofmengirly
Can I have an ARGH moment here at my dear husband?

I told him last year when we were doing taxes that he needed to change his forms at work so that they would take out MORE money each paycheck, so we''d not be paying at tax return time. He said, ''Okay, Jen.'' Did he do it? No. Do we get money back? No. We just barely owe money, but dang, it''s his fault! He makes a considerable amount more than I do (he''s been a teacher longer than I''ve been with the state, and he has a higher degree than I do), and I''ve had a considerably higher amount of taxes witheld throughout the year. Argh! I was hoping we''d get back something; I wanted to put it in the baby fund.

Sorry for the mini thread jack-

Hey Fisher!

I''m no tax expert but I just wanted to tell you something that my mother told me when I was griping about getting just a tidbit of money back a few years. She pointed out that if you pretty much break even the payroll people are doing a good job of estimating your taxes and taking out the appropriate amount. Sure, its great to get a nice fat refund but if you are getting a refund that just means you''re paying too much tax each pay period. To make the fact that you''re not getting a huge refund back think of it this way- you didn''t just give the US government an interest free loan from your paycheck that they pay back to you around April 15th.

 

[icekid]

Date: 3/30/2009 4:52:07 PM
Author: dreamer_dachsie
Fisher If you crossed at Niagara fall that is southern Ontario. Actually, it is the niagara peninsula, which is wine country and a very nice place to visit if you wanted to stay in lovel B&Bs and go on wine tours etc. If you cross closer to the east coase and NY, then Montreal is very close. So both are driving distance. PEI and Vancouver, not so much!

Fishie- I am not Canadian, but might as well be

And I actually had the same region in mind as DD. There is a little town called Niagara-on-the-lake, which is such a fun place to go in the summer. It''s a darling little resort town with good food, fun shopping, and the Shaw Festival. Nearby there are tons of wineries, too. It''s so much fun. NOTL is basically right across the border from Niagara Falls/Buffalo, if your friends are that way. Toronto (amazing city) is a couple hours north. My hubby and I actually spent a couple days of our mini-honeymoon in NOTL, then another 4-5 days in Toronto. And this is saying a lot, since I grew up so close to the area.

If your friends are upstate toward say, Lake Placid- then Montreal and/or Ottawa would be lovely destinations, too. Obviously these would be more city activities, compared with NOTL.

 

[tiffanytwisted]

Festy- I totally don''t mind sharing my IUI experience. We''ve done 3 clomid/IUI cycles so far. I take the clomid on cycle day 5-9, start using OPK''s on CD 12, and when I get a positive I call the RE''s office and go in the next day with hubby''s sample. We live close to the office (the sample needs to be there within an hour). I wait usually about 30 minutes to an hour while they "wash" the sample, and the actual procedure is done in an exam room. They use a speculum, insert a catheter through the cervix, then use a syringe to inject the sample into the uterus. The first time I had some cramping afterwards but for the most part it''s relatively painless. I actually find it less uncomfortable than a pap. Not much to it really. He always encourages us to have intercourse that night too to cover our bases.
The first month we did a follicle scan to see how I was responding to the clomid but I haven''t done one the last two months. Some RE''s do back to back IUI''s (2 spaced 24 hours apart) but mine only does one. The literature I''ve found doesn''t really show much difference in success rates between doing 1 or 2 as long as they are well timed with ovulation. And since my insurance doesn''t pay for the procedure I''m happy doing one.
Good luck! Hopefully you''ll get a BFP soon!

 

[fisherofmengirly]

Thanks for the ideas on places to visit, ladies. I''ll run them by Paul for sure.

****

Claritek,

That is exactly what Paul said when I told him about us owing! He said he likes it that way, so he never has to worry about being sent an "I owe you." Haha. California is doing that this year and my parents are LIVID!!

****
Tiffany,

Thanks for explaining the IUI deal. So, is it used primarily when the sperm is the issue, since you''re ovulating and they don''t have to take the egg out of you to fertilize? I guess I''m trying to understand the difference between IUI and IVF, and why some people start with IUI then move to IVF. Confused.

Was it a hard decision to try IUI? I''m always curious about that sort of thing. I nearly went nuts trying to decide if we should to clomid.

****
Melanie,

How are you doing? When are you testing?

****
Icekid,

Are you one of us now?

Hope so!

****
So, today is 7 DPO. My Dr. doesn''t need me to do the 7 DPO progesterone test, at least not this cycle, because he says based on my charts, my temp goes up enough to make him think that my LH surge is adequate. I called on Friday to ask again, and the receptionist (her name is Kim; I called her probably 20 times before I made and kept an appt!!) said, "Oh my gosh, did you already ovulate?" It was cute to know that she at least remembered the psycho who calls all the time, and that she at least seemed to care. Anyway, no 7 DPO testing for me. They did say to call when my cycle ends or I get a positive test, though. She said if I get pregnant, they can work me in that week to do a BETA!

Yay! She said an ultrasound that early wouldn''t tell them much, so I''d probably wait til week 5-6.

Anyway, again, the cart before the horse.

I wish a good Tuesday to everyone!

****
Tiffany, thinking about you and your test girl... for tomorrow, it will be GOOD news!!

 

[Mandarine]

Festy!!! Welcome back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!. We''ve been wanting to go to Argentina forever, I hope one day we make it down there!. Sounds like you had a great time! We missed you around here!

Fisher I''m so glad Martha is doing well! That''s such wonderful news!!!!

. On the taxes, DH and I have the oppossite argument. He wants them to take less money from my paycheck because he doesn''t like "lending" money to the government!...haha

I hope everyone else is doing great!

M~

 

[icekid]

Date: 3/31/2009 7:43:39 AM
Author: fisherofmengirly
Thanks for the ideas on places to visit, ladies. I''ll run them by Paul for sure.

****
Icekid,

Are you one of us now?

Hope so!

****

Sigh- I wish! Just a (sad

) lurker, for now. I love routing for you ladies, though

 

[Festy]

Tiffany - thanks so much for the run-down. It sounds minimally invasive and I like the fact that they tell you to DTD too. I hope the third time''s a charm.

Hiya Mandy! Thanks! I hope you''re doing well. I lurk in the Preggo thread from time to time to keep tabs on y''all! I hope you get to Argentina too! When we were in Buenos Aires we saw a family with three kids (plus nanny, of course) so it is doable with kids. Depending on your definition of doable.

We also saw plenty of Buenos Aires natives out to dinner at 10:00 with their very young kids. Incredible!

 

[mela lu]

Date: 3/30/2009 3:19:07 PM
Author: dreamer_dachsie

QUOTE>Date: 3/30/2009 9:28:01 AM
You will have to fly no matter where you come, so why not choose the best place you can? In my opinion, the best places in decending order are: 1) Vancouver and Vancouver Island (where I am moving for my job!); 2) Nova Scotia/PEI; 3) Montreal. I think Montreal is the only one that you would consider 'not that far into Canada' since it is probably straight north from you, or close to it. And Montreal will seem more foreign since it is French! Don't worry, many/most people speak English so it is very easy as a tourist. It is simply THE most beautiful city in Canada, it reminds me so much of Europe. And in the summer they have both a Jazz festival and a comedy festival, which is awesome. Southern Ontario where i live now is not that amazing, IMHO, although the wine country is very nice on the Niagara peninsula. But I am a west coast gal at heart and BC is by far the most beutiful scernery and environment that canada has to offer. However, I did drive around the north-west coast of Nova Scotia and it was a very very close second

Simply gorgeous. Let me know if you have any questions!

Hi girls!!

FWIW, as a fellow Canadian (in Toronto), I completely agree with Dreamer's assessment of Canadian beauty.
1) Vancouver and Vancouver Island
2) Nova Scotia/PEI
3) Montreal.

and I'm going to add:
4) Banff / Lake Louise in Alberta

Okay - back to lurking....

 

[swimmer]

Has anyone else done the carrier screening blood tests? Apparently I had them done and am a carrier for several different really scary things. Not concerned yet as DH hasn''t yet been tested, but am wondering about issues of knowledge, empowerment, blissful ignorance, and ultimately what we would do if we are both carriers. Anyone else dealing with this?

 

[Dreamer_D]

Date: 3/31/2009 11:39:17 AM
Author: swimmer
Has anyone else done the carrier screening blood tests? Apparently I had them done and am a carrier for several different really scary things. Not concerned yet as DH hasn''t yet been tested, but am wondering about issues of knowledge, empowerment, blissful ignorance, and ultimately what we would do if we are both carriers. Anyone else dealing with this?

Not dealing with it, but I say a programme on it... are you of Ashkenazi jewish heritage? I think that with any type of screening, how you progress depends on what you would do in the event that you conceived a child affected by a particular genertic disorder. If you wouldn''t do anything, then blissful ignorance sounds good to me! So maybe you only need to find out more information if you would use that information to make a decision about continuing a pregnancy?

Somehow I remember a thread about this?? Or am I imagining things??

 

[Festy]

Date: 3/31/2009 11:39:17 AM
Author: swimmer
Has anyone else done the carrier screening blood tests? Apparently I had them done and am a carrier for several different really scary things. Not concerned yet as DH hasn''t yet been tested, but am wondering about issues of knowledge, empowerment, blissful ignorance, and ultimately what we would do if we are both carriers. Anyone else dealing with this?

Hi Swimmer,

I got tested, but wasn''t a carrier for any of the (seemingly random) assortment of scary diseases, so DH never got tested. Since I like putting things off, I''d probably wait to ask myself those really tough questions until your DH gets tested. But then I''m a professional procrastinator.

 

[NovemberBride]

Swimmer,

I haven''t been tested, but I probably will be. Neither DH or I are of any of the ethnicities that are at higher risk for many of the things that they test for, but I am a big believer in knowledge is power. If we were of one of those ethnicities, I probably would have gotten tested before we TTC. Also, we would probably terminate a pregnancy if there was a birth defect that was incompatible with life. Even if you wouldn''t terminate a pregnancy, I still would want to know because I could prepare mentally and emotionally for having a very sick child. I see no reason not to test, it''s not as if knowing will change the outcome for the worse. That said, it''s a personal decision and I understand everyone would not want to know.

 

[swimmer]

Thanks DD and Festy,
I did look for old threads, found an argument/discussion on the right age to reproduce. Innnnnteresting. I don't believe that knowing would impact the decision to CARRY a child. But it could impact decisions about ttc, like when we decide to throw in the towel on my ability to do this and look more deeply into finding a child that needs a better shot at parents. Not that adoption is a path of last resort, but well, these are hard decisions. I did not know that I was being screened for anything more than Gaucher and Tay-Sachs, and the nurse who called me at work today said nothing about Gaucher (I'm probably not a carrier, but DH prob is). She said that I'm a carrier for Cystic Fibrosis and Tay-Sachs. So DH will be going in for testing now that we know that much, but what to do with that info while we are ttc, that is the question we have to muddle through.

ETA: Thank you November, I understand your point totally. A relative had to deliver a full term stillborn; they knew the baby would not likely live a full year based on early test results, but the little baby didn't make it even that long. Of course we all understand that sometimes these terrible things happen during delivery to otherwise perfect babies. I do not want to get into the political aspects of the decisions inherently present there, but to knowingly carry a child who will live, but with issues of some sort is something I know I could do, but to carry a baby just for it to quickly die a painful death seems something else entirely. I haven't been able to reach DH yet and I don't want him to be fearful of trying (his background is in bio) we went through that b/c his brother has schizophrenia and DH was very scared about the 1-2% chance of passing that on. Now i'm just rambling. And I don't want to worry other people about their chances of getting these results. Apparently I am statistically improbable all around.

 

[melz]

Swimmer - we were tested for tay-sachs as part of the iui process. Him b/c he is eastern european jewish, and me b/c I am 1/2 French Canadian. 1 in 27 of each are carriers. We were both negative.

If we had done it the "natural" way, we never would have tested, never would have known. But knowing what I know now ... I think I would go the extra step of being tested. Then if one or both of us turned up positive, we could do ivf and screen for embryos that didn''t have it.

Fisher - April 8th for the blood test! And that''s if I can wait that long and don''t do a home test first. Which would probably turn up negative so early and then I would just be bummed for a few days. Today I''m back to being excited, over the weekend I started to get overwhelmed at the thought of having a baby. Then I spoke to a couple of friends with children, and they assured me that it''s normal. Which I kind of figured, but still ... nice to hear.

 

[Sha]

Hi everyone,
Just a really quick drive-by to say ''Hope everyone is having a great Tuesday!!"

Welcome back, Festy!

Fisher, you''re almost at that time!!! 7 dpo! When are you planning to test? Sorry if I missed it along the way....

Thinking great thoughts for you and melanie this cycle! And for anyone else in the tww!

 

[lovelylulu]

congratulations sha!!!

fisher - this cycle is flying for you!!! can''t wait until you test!

***********************************
So I''ve been MIA - not much news to report - my husband has been out of town on business during my *window* so unless there is some kind of immaculate conception, I''m out. while last cycle I couldn''t fathom sitting out a chance to make a baby, this cycle I''m welcoming the break.

In non-ttc news, we have added another pup to our family, a cavalier king charles spaniel that is just the most happy-go-lucky little guy. pictures below (i hope).

 

[ChinaCat]

Lulu- He''s ADORABLE!!!!! What''s his name? Oh, I just love puppies and puppy breath! My DH makes fun of me b/c I get all teary-eyed at all of the puppy commercials, but am pretty meh at baby commercials. So cute!!!!! We have one that lives near us and she is just the cutest fireball. I have a big black Lab, but Lily always wants to run and play with him, she totally holds her own with the big dogs. I kinda want one now.

 

[melz]

LOVE HIM!

 

[fisherofmengirly]

Okay, mini-freak out to follow:

So, today I had tons, oodles, gobs of CM. I've never had that after ovulation, and now I'm completely freaking that maybe I got dupped *again* this cycle and I've not really ovulated, and I'm about to. NO!!!! We've been so "secure" in this cycle's early ovulation, we've made no attempts at BDing since Friday. ACKKK!!!! So, now I wonder if Clomid really did do anything. Plus, I've been having those weird twitches, cramps, odd feelings down there, so I wonder if maybe that's my body gearing up for ovulation. The funny thing is, my chart shows a really great ovulation, though. So I'm trying not to freak out, but I am, none the less.

I didn't put in today's CM because I don't know what to label it as. It's been like totally watery, but with some coloration, too. So that has me wondering if it's a combination? I want to say it even had some elements of eggwhite. Geez... that's like three kinds in one. What in the world??

Do you guys think that clomid faked me out, too? Aye.....

I'll add my chart, as of today, even though I just recently posted it, I'm really thinking maybe my crosshairs might switch on me...

Okay, deep breaths, either way, it will be fine. This baby is going to happen when its supposed to happen.

In other news, LULU!!! Your puppy is adorable!! Must post more pictures for us! How's the pup doing getting used to your family? Awww... I wanna play with the floppy ears!!! L

VE that pooch!!

Did you get the HSG (those are the right initials, aren't they?) this cycle? How long will it take to get the results?

ETA:

Swimmer, hey girl! Glad to see you "around" again. As for the testing, Paul and I won't be doing that, unless we're told to at some point in the TTC journey. Neither of us are in any of the categories of higher chances of issues, and if our child did have any issues, we would absolutely have it and raise it to the best of our abilities and love it like crazy. Plus, I'm a worry wart, so why find out that there's a chance of something bad before it even happens?

However, I am now leaning toward doing the NT scan at 12 weeks, where as I wasn't before. Mostly, we'd like to have the information prior to birth to prepare for a special needs child, if it ends up that way.

 

[sunkist]

Fisher, my opinion? I think there is no way you were faked out. You Totally O'd. BD for fun if you like, but just for fun. Cause I say you're totally in the TWW, Jen. Just keep track of symptoms so you can compare to next month (if there is one!!)

I'm feeling really good for you Fisher. Just hang in there.

eta: And, CM and "O" pains after O can be a good sign, especially around 7DPO if you know what I mean..! I just checked my last chart and I charted EWCM on 8DPO.

 

[sunkist]

Lulu what a doll! You are so lucky! He looks so healthy, that makes me happy. I know another King Charles puppy just like that and I think his owners don''t feed him enough. He''s so skinny

Your pup looks very happy. Thanks for the pics!

 

[tiffanytwisted]

Date: 3/31/2009 7:43:39 AM
Author: fisherofmengirly
Thanks for the ideas on places to visit, ladies. I''ll run them by Paul for sure.

****

Claritek,

That is exactly what Paul said when I told him about us owing! He said he likes it that way, so he never has to worry about being sent an ''I owe you.'' Haha. California is doing that this year and my parents are LIVID!!

****
Tiffany,

Thanks for explaining the IUI deal. So, is it used primarily when the sperm is the issue, since you''re ovulating and they don''t have to take the egg out of you to fertilize? I guess I''m trying to understand the difference between IUI and IVF, and why some people start with IUI then move to IVF. Confused.

Was it a hard decision to try IUI? I''m always curious about that sort of thing. I nearly went nuts trying to decide if we should to clomid.

****
Melanie,

How are you doing? When are you testing?

****
Icekid,

Are you one of us now?

Hope so!

****
So, today is 7 DPO. My Dr. doesn''t need me to do the 7 DPO progesterone test, at least not this cycle, because he says based on my charts, my temp goes up enough to make him think that my LH surge is adequate. I called on Friday to ask again, and the receptionist (her name is Kim; I called her probably 20 times before I made and kept an appt!!) said, ''Oh my gosh, did you already ovulate?'' It was cute to know that she at least remembered the psycho who calls all the time, and that she at least seemed to care. Anyway, no 7 DPO testing for me. They did say to call when my cycle ends or I get a positive test, though. She said if I get pregnant, they can work me in that week to do a BETA!

Yay! She said an ultrasound that early wouldn''t tell them much, so I''d probably wait til week 5-6.

Anyway, again, the cart before the horse.

I wish a good Tuesday to everyone!

****
Tiffany, thinking about you and your test girl... for tomorrow, it will be GOOD news!!

Fisher- A lot of RE''s combine clomid with IUI since clomid can decrease the amount of cervical fluid the IUI bypasses that and inserts the sperm into the uterus.
It really wasn''t that difficult of a decision for me, we''ve been trying for so long that I was ready to do something more.

 

[Dreamer_D]

Date: 3/31/2009 9:06:02 PM
Author: sunkist
Fisher, my opinion? I think there is no way you were faked out. You Totally O''d. BD for fun if you like, but just for fun. Cause I say you''re totally in the TWW, Jen. Just keep track of symptoms so you can compare to next month (if there is one!!)

I''m feeling really good for you Fisher. Just hang in there.

eta: And, CM and ''O'' pains after O can be a good sign, especially around 7DPO if you know what I mean..! I just checked my last chart and I charted EWCM on 8DPO.

Ditto. And lots of CM post-O is a sign of pregnancy! I checked my preggo chart and I had it starting at 9DPO, got my BFP two days later. Unfortunately it can also be a sign of AFF

but that seems unlikely for you with your typical 14 day LP. Does climid affect the LP?? Seems unlikely.

 

[fisherofmengirly]

So when I told Paul my sorrows over missed ovulation, he told me I''m nuts (he does a morning peek at my chart since I log it into FF from my phone while I''m still in bed. It''s funny how much this TTC stuff becomes daily routine for us...). I guess I am. My temps are really high and I don''t think Clomid could mess with my temps so much that I''d ovulate in the 98.5 range and then soar higher afterwards. I just find it odd about the CM. Hmm.

DD, I''ve not read or heard anything about Clomid making LP shorter, but some have had it increase LP by a day or two.

Anyway, I don''t know. I guess anything out of what I''m used to throws me for a loop.

Thanks for giving me some relief that I probably won''t have jumping crosshairs this time, though. I hope, hope, hope!!!

 

[natalina]

Date: 3/31/2009 9:46:49 PM
Author: dreamer_dachsie

Date: 3/31/2009 9:06:02 PM
Author: sunkist
Fisher, my opinion? I think there is no way you were faked out. You Totally O''d. BD for fun if you like, but just for fun. Cause I say you''re totally in the TWW, Jen. Just keep track of symptoms so you can compare to next month (if there is one!!)

I''m feeling really good for you Fisher. Just hang in there.

eta: And, CM and ''O'' pains after O can be a good sign, especially around 7DPO if you know what I mean..! I just checked my last chart and I charted EWCM on 8DPO.

Ditto. And lots of CM post-O is a sign of pregnancy! I checked my preggo chart and I had it starting at 9DPO, got my BFP two days later. Unfortunately it can also be a sign of AFF

but that seems unlikely for you with your typical 14 day LP. Does climid affect the LP?? Seems unlikely.

Me too, er, me three, I guess! Never had noticeable CM before AF EXCEPT for the cycle I got preggo! Cramps, twinges, too! I don''t want to get your hopes up too high because I know anything is possible, but ooooohhhh Fisher- I feel good about this month for you!!!!

Lulu- He is so cute! My parents have had Cavaliers for the past 18 years. They are the sweetest, most lovey dogs! Congratualtions on your new sweetie!

 

[peonygirl]

Fisher, you''re probably fine, but you could BD extra just in case if you wanted! I have really high hopes for you this cycle!!

Swimmer, very sorry to hear that about your test results, but I truly believe that knowledge is power in that domain. Is your DH also an Ashkenazi Jew? Luckily both of the things you mentioned are recessive, so if he doesn''t have them you''re totally in the clear! Overall, about 15-20% of Jews carry an alelle for one of the many disorders we have at higher rates, which is really scary! But for an individual disease it''s much lower, so your DH has a good chance of having neither of them. Honestly, you''re right that the two things you mentioned are really awful.

It''s not just a matter of lower quality of life, but an early and excrutiating death in both cases, especially with Tay-Sachs (not trying to freak you out at all, because it sounds like you already know this!). It is unlikely that it would come down to that for you because I''m REALLY hoping that your DH isn''t a carrier, but there is preimplantation screening available in both cases. Please keep us updated, okay?

 

[fisherofmengirly]

Happy first day of April, ladies.

***
Tiffany, thinking about you today!!! All the best wishes for *wonderful* news, and no Fool''s jokes, either!

***
Sha, I don''t know when I''ll test. If I do, it won''t be before Tuesday, when I''d be at 14 DPO. Not sure. I''m kind of leary of testing, though... I always get my hopes up and think I see something, but there''s nothing there. At this point, I doubt I''d believe it if there was something there. In the words of LL, *meh.*


***
Today''s temp was the same as yesterday''s (98.59), so I guess that CM thing was just a fluke. Odd. Anyway, I''m pretty much thinking now the crosshairs are here to stay. Yay!!!


***
Melanie, how are you feeling? Going nuts in the midst of the waiting game? Hope not!!


***
Claritek, do you happen to have a thread on your ring?

It''s so pretty and it reminds me a lot of mine. I thought maybe there''d be a way I could drool over it a little more.

***
Icekid, I remember you saying now your job prevents you from TTC. Well, girl, this is the place to learn all about the process, so you''ll be ready and prepared when the time comes. And when it does, I wish much success to you (and fast, too).

***
Lovely, what did you name Mr. Cutie Pants Puppy?

 

[Pandora II]

Date: 3/31/2009 12:55:32 PM
Author: swimmer
Thanks DD and Festy,
I did look for old threads, found an argument/discussion on the right age to reproduce. Innnnnteresting. I don't believe that knowing would impact the decision to CARRY a child. But it could impact decisions about ttc, like when we decide to throw in the towel on my ability to do this and look more deeply into finding a child that needs a better shot at parents. Not that adoption is a path of last resort, but well, these are hard decisions. I did not know that I was being screened for anything more than Gaucher and Tay-Sachs, and the nurse who called me at work today said nothing about Gaucher (I'm probably not a carrier, but DH prob is). She said that I'm a carrier for Cystic Fibrosis and Tay-Sachs. So DH will be going in for testing now that we know that much, but what to do with that info while we are ttc, that is the question we have to muddle through.

ETA: Thank you November, I understand your point totally. A relative had to deliver a full term stillborn; they knew the baby would not likely live a full year based on early test results, but the little baby didn't make it even that long. Of course we all understand that sometimes these terrible things happen during delivery to otherwise perfect babies. I do not want to get into the political aspects of the decisions inherently present there, but to knowingly carry a child who will live, but with issues of some sort is something I know I could do, but to carry a baby just for it to quickly die a painful death seems something else entirely. I haven't been able to reach DH yet and I don't want him to be fearful of trying (his background is in bio) we went through that b/c his brother has schizophrenia and DH was very scared about the 1-2% chance of passing that on. Now i'm just rambling. And I don't want to worry other people about their chances of getting these results. Apparently I am statistically improbable all around.

Sorry to hear about the test results - fingers crossed that your DH is clear.

I had a lot of genetic counselling at the beginning of this pregnancy - DH has Hereditary Spherocystosis which is autosomal dominant and so we have a 50% chance that any child will have the disease. Plus, my mother has MS, my father's family has a history of Huntington's (fortunately now died out we think) and we both have huge amounts of mental illness on both sides. (I totally understand your DH's feelings on that - mine wanted to adopt to avoid the chances - I pointed out that a) we can't adopt because I'm bipolar and wouldn't pass the adoption screening process and b) at least we will know our child's genetic background rather than confronting the unknown.)

It's not been helped by my family having had various 1st cousins marry each other - so I am also my own cousin... not good genetically and we are all banned from inter-marrying (not that I would want to

)

I couldn't be tested in advance - although we were offered Tay-Sachs as DH is jewish but my jewish ancestory is so incredibly distant they didn't think it would be an issue - but they will do cord bloods on the baby straight after birth and commence treatment at the earliest signs of any jaundice even if they can't get a clear result (it can take up to three months to get a clear result from neonatal bloods).

My personal take on things is to educate yourself about the various possible conditions and what they actually entail before TTC so that you know the risks. Choosing to carry a child with a condition like Down's Syndrome is a very different kettle of fish than a terrible and tragic condition like Tay-Sachs that you wouldn't put your worst enemy through let alone your own child. If your husband tests positive as well, I would so recommend doing pre-screening.

The chances are that everything will be fine and I'll be keeping my fingers crossed for you!