Unsolicited advice on marriage?

[cocolaw]

Date: 7/23/2009 9:53:19 AM
Author: Hudson_Hawk

Date: 7/22/2009 6:05:39 PM

Author: Winslet

This isn''t so much marriage advice, but I think I might puke if one more person says to me: ''Your bridesmaids should just carry a couple of long-stemmed calla lilies, it would be sooooo SIMPLE and ELEGANT.'' Seriously, is that the ONLY simple and elegant look a bride can go for? I''ve heard this from about 10 different people.

I had a friend who did this and I thought it was hideous and very 80''s.

i had someone tell me that they wanted me to only have purple tulips on the table with glitter sprinkled around the table, and that it would be a really inexpensive, but pretty, way to do the flowers.

 

[Hudson_Hawk]

Date: 7/23/2009 10:44:43 AM
Author: cocolaw

Date: 7/23/2009 9:53:19 AM

Author: Hudson_Hawk

Date: 7/22/2009 6:05:39 PM


Author: Winslet


This isn''t so much marriage advice, but I think I might puke if one more person says to me: ''Your bridesmaids should just carry a couple of long-stemmed calla lilies, it would be sooooo SIMPLE and ELEGANT.'' Seriously, is that the ONLY simple and elegant look a bride can go for? I''ve heard this from about 10 different people.

I had a friend who did this and I thought it was hideous and very 80''s.

i had someone tell me that they wanted me to only have purple tulips on the table with glitter sprinkled around the table, and that it would be a really inexpensive, but pretty, way to do the flowers.

They''re either:
A. In first grade

B. A preschool teacher

or

C. A stripper-''cause only a stripper would think glitter is an acceptable table decoration at a formal wedding.

 

[cocolaw]

Date: 7/23/2009 10:54:51 AM
Author: Hudson_Hawk

Date: 7/23/2009 10:44:43 AM

Author: cocolaw

Date: 7/23/2009 9:53:19 AM


Author: Hudson_Hawk

Date: 7/22/2009 6:05:39 PM



Author: Winslet



This isn''t so much marriage advice, but I think I might puke if one more person says to me: ''Your bridesmaids should just carry a couple of long-stemmed calla lilies, it would be sooooo SIMPLE and ELEGANT.'' Seriously, is that the ONLY simple and elegant look a bride can go for? I''ve heard this from about 10 different people.

I had a friend who did this and I thought it was hideous and very 80''s.

i had someone tell me that they wanted me to only have purple tulips on the table with glitter sprinkled around the table, and that it would be a really inexpensive, but pretty, way to do the flowers.

They''re either:

A. In first grade


B. A preschool teacher


or


C. A stripper-''cause only a stripper would think glitter is an acceptable table decoration at a formal wedding.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

 

[katamari]

Date: 7/23/2009 9:40:57 AM
Author: purselover

Date: 7/22/2009 8:29:19 PM

Author: trillionaire

Date: 7/22/2009 6:18:21 PM

Author: Bjedifish

Date: 7/22/2009 3:52:31 PM


Author: ilovesparkles


Soooooo many people like to say ''Just elope, the wedding is never worth the money!'' And I am sick and tired of it! Maybe I think it is worth the small amount we will be putting into it, and I would like to have a grand old time with my family and friends!

YESSS!!! I am getting thing ALL THE TIME!!! its infuriating!!

!! My response to this is: Dammit! everyone else in my family got the big wedding, I want one too!! Sheesh!



I tell ya, when you''ve pictured a day in your life from the time you were 5 it totally sucks when people try to make you feel guilty about wanting to enjoy it.

Trust me, if you HAVEN''T pictures your wedding day your whole life and you have no desire for a wedding or a princess fantasy, they treat you like an alien too.


There is NO WAY to please people.

I know! You should''ve seen the looks I got when I said I didn''t really care if we had a cake or not, and the looks when I said I didn''t want a veil, or bridesmaids.

Isn''t this the truth! It was one of the worst things about planning with vendors.

My least favorite is all the gendered stuff, like, "You''d better learn how to cook." or "Well, there goes all his beer tastings with the friends because you''ll never let him out of the house again." I have gotten pretty snippy about it and generally say something to the effect of "Just because you are unhappy/unequal in your marriage, doesn''t mean we will be."

 

[ficklefaye]

Date: 7/22/2009 10:27:09 PM
Author: charbie

Date: 7/22/2009 11:50:18 AM
Author: ficklefaye
oh gosh, i get that a lot too, the weird part was people kept telling me to elope! this was after i had already booked my ceremony and reception spots...

I HATE THAT! I want the big shabang, thank you very much!

i''m with ya on that charbie! i should tell them next time, ''you had your turn, so let me have mine!''

 

[ficklefaye]

Date: 7/22/2009 10:29:18 PM
Author: Haven
We also got a lot of unsolicited marriage advice. It ranged from strange to downright rude.

I like to say that everyone has an opinion, but very few people have opinions worth sharing--they just don''t know it.

The worst advice we got was when a woman told us that she hopes our marriage isn''t the hell that hers was. She elaborated, and we just sat there like

.

Here''s my unsolicited advice: savor every minute of every day of your life.

haven, that''s just terrible about having to listen to that''s woman''s hell of a marriage, did you even know her?

 

[HollyS]

It''s been that way since the cavemen. It is a bonding ritual between women, or family, or friends, or even a way for acquaintances to feel ''part of the process''. Don''t take any of it personally; take it with good humor and grace. And be thankful, in the moment, that you are on the inside of this time honored (or time worn, depending on your viewpoint

) ritual. There is many a woman who longs to be where you are right now.

 

[trillionaire]

Date: 7/25/2009 7:51:07 PM
Author: HollyS
It''s been that way since the cavemen. It is a bonding ritual between women, or family, or friends, or even a way for acquaintances to feel ''part of the process''. Don''t take any of it personally; take it with good humor and grace. And be thankful, in the moment, that you are on the inside of this time honored (or time worn, depending on your viewpoint

) ritual. There is many a woman who longs to be where you are right now.

Very well put HollyS.

I''m also getting a little

by all the people referring to us as ''The Modern Day Huxtables'', and people telling us that we are the reason that they have faith in dating/relationships! Um, pressure much?

Trying to take it ALL in stride and with grace!

 

[Squirrly]

lol when i read the title of this thread my first thought was to reply with "run"

no real advice stories yet since i''m not officially engaged, although when people tell me i don''t know what i''m getting myself into, i just smile and say oh i know fully well what i''m getting into, he''s the one that doesn''t know what he''s gotten himself into.

for some odd reason they agree with me