What is your budget???

[Pandora II]

Date: 2/12/2009 4:58:23 PM
Author: FrekeChild

Date: 2/12/2009 12:04:15 PM
Author: wellinsm
I mean no disrespect but I personally could not spend more than that on my wedding. It''s just not my personality or my husband''s personality type to do so. To me personally it is a waste. But if that is what other people want to do and spend I think you should do and have what you want and what you can afford to have. We could have had a much larger and more expensive wedding, but I prefer to have a remodeled kitchen instead. The details that I read about on this board hold no interest to me to plan and organize. I only had a bouquet so I''d have something to hold in my hands during the ceremony!

Since no one else is, I''ll bite.

If you have to put a disclaimer before a judgmental statement, you probably shouldn''t be making that statement in the first place. Your priorities are your priorities, and that''s fine, but making judgmental statements about other people''s wedding budgets (which is a sensitive topic in the first place), is just plain rude. I don''t care that there was an added statement about how we can do what makes us happy, it was clearly making judgments on the posters who posted before you.

For some people they are taking on second jobs, and cutting down on other non-essentials so they can afford the wedding of their dreams, and it is not your job to make people feel bad about the money they are spending on their wedding. I know of many brides who are postponing their honeymoons so that they aren''t paying such a large chunk of change all at one time. Some brides are getting engaged and then putting off their weddings for a couple years so they can save up to have the wedding that they want. And those weddings are not necessarily these extravagant monstrosities that your post made them out to be.

It''s great that you decided to put renovating a kitchen in front of your wedding. But a lot of women have been dreaming of this day since they were little, it is my sincere wish that for everyone here, that it will be one of the best days of their lives, and it is uncalled for your post to make them feel bad about how much they are spending. The economy sucks right now, and EVERYONE is conscious of the dismal financial climate, but they certainly don''t need it rubbed in their faces, which is what your post did to ME, and I''m sure other ladies here.

Not to even get into that the section of your post I quoted has nothing to do with the questions of the original post.

Not cool.

Also - some of us are fulfilling parent''s dreams and wishes as well as our own. DH and I offered to elope (and would have been quite happy to do so) but my parents were very clear that this was something that they had been looking forward to for a LONG time. At least half our guests were their friends.

Some areas of the country cost a LOT more than others - where my parents live is EXPENSIVE, but if I''d been doing it in London I would have had to double the budget to pull off the same event.

I was 35 and DH 32 when we got married (first marriage for both of us). We own two properties and are debt free other than our mortgage, I still put a lot of work and effort into achieving all the things we wanted without breaking the bank so I feel perfectly happy about my decision to drop $500 on my antique veil.

In 30 years time or so when the daughter we are expecting in May decides to tie the knot I will get far more pleasure out of watching her walk down the aisle in the same veil that I wore to marry her father than I would out of those now long-obsolete kitchen cupboards!

As you say - everyone has their priorities, but if you have no interest in such things, why bother posting/reading on such a board? It would be like me going to a car forum and wondering why people buy extras for their cars when I see them as things to get you from A to B...

 

[marchswallowbird]

We don't have a "budget" as far as having a set dollar amount to stay within. We are trying to do everything within reason and within what we can afford, based on what things actually cost. We're only having 40 people...about $23,000 for everything. Getting married in Yosemite can be EXPENSIVE.

Rings: $6,500
Save the date cards: $50
Invitations: $300
Chapel fee: $400
National Park Service application and permit fee: $150
Minister: $400
Flowers: $1400 (includes $250 in delivery fees)
Photographer: $4,700 (includes $400 in travel fees)
Pianist for ceremony and cocktail hour: $550
Reception venue: $400
Cake: $400
Reception food and beverage (including alcohol): $4,000
Reception decor: $150
Favors: $250
iPod music for reception, and slideshow for reception: $150
Dress: $760
Alterations: $250
Veil: $60
Shoes: $110
Jewelry (which I will also wear after the wedding): $300
Rehearsal dinner dress: $165
Rehersal dinner shoes: $100
Hair and make-up (including travel fees): $500
Nails, spray tan, etc. $90
FI's suit (purchase) $350
FI's shoes (purchase) $100

 

[Cleopatra]

I live in a fairly small town - and here was our budget breakdown:

Budget:

Reception Hall - $1,000
Photographer - $2,100
Dress, Shoes, Veil, Accessories - $1,400
Alterations - $150
Food and Alcohol - $13,000
Church - $300
Tuxedo for Groom - $125
Gifts for Wedding Party - $500
Rehearsal Dinner – FREE
Marriage License - $50
Guestbook, Garter, pen, other accessories - $200
Cake - $1,000
Flowers - $600
Band - $1,800
Ceremony Musicians - $200
Invitations and STDs – FREE
Stamps - $100
Wedding night rooms for us and wedding party - $700
Limo – FREE
DIY Centerpieces - $500
Disposable cameras - $100

Total: Approximately $24,000

Not included in budget

Wedding Bands:
Mine - $700
DH’s - $400
Honeymoon - $7,000

Approximate total for everything (excluding engagement ring)
$32,100

 

[packrat]

Oooo I''m kinda starry eyed about some of the budgets! We live in a teensy town, so prices of things are so much lower than what a lot of you guys have to pay. But then, we don''t have the choices either..we have some churches, or the community college or the country club, or outside. We''re pretty limited here. My parents paid for everything, and I''m pretty sure it was less than $5000. My mom worked at the Greenhouse where most people get their flowers from, so I''m sure she got a discount, plus she and my aunt who also worked there went to a flower show and got a bunch of stuff dirt cheap-candle holders and ribbons etc. One of the women they worked w/there made all the bows and did some extra stuff on her own time as our wedding gift. At first I was a little hesitant about not being there to help pick stuff out, but it was my mom and aunt doing it-they know what I like. It was about $50 to rent the church, another $100 for the VFW for the reception. (2001 prices) I think the most expensive part was the pictures, and if I could do it all over again, I''d have asked for a little more to spend on them and gotten somebody different-our pictures are pretty standard. The food was all made by friends and family. We got some pretty paper and envelopes from Staples and made our own invitations and programs. Ohh the fun I''d have had w/a larger budget!

 

[vetrik]

We had a wedding in MA for 72 guests. We set a budget of $10,000 and I think we ended up going over by about $2,000 when it was all said and done. Of course, $1,000 of the overage was the cost for the horse drawn carriages for the guests and for DH and I that my mom insisted we had to include! That does not include the rehearsal dinner, honeymoon, or rings.

DH''s parents contributed $5,000 and paid for the rehearsal dinner. My parents paid most of the rest of the costs - DH and I paid for incidentals (I paid $500 towards my dress since I went over budget there, materials to make my veil, my shoes, my tiara, etc) along with the honeymoon and rings.

We were able to have a wonderful location for the ceremony and reception that set the mood and atmosphere for the whole day, which was important to us, by scrimping in a lot of areas that we didn''t feel were as important. We made the centerpieces (that doubled as favors) ourselves and bought potted plants from a nursery for church/reception decor to save on the florist bill, one of my bridesmaids is a cosmetologist so she did everyone''s hair and makeup, DH''s cousin videotaped the wedding, we didn''t have programs, the cake was included in the cost of the reception, my mother-in-law made my veil, etc.

 

[dcgator]

We are having our wedding in So. FL. I live in DC, so I think I dodged a bullet with super expensive places, although Fort Lauderdale is not too much better. Our initial budget was about $30K. We are fotunate in that my parents are footing most of the bill. Originally, the majority of the funds would come from my mom, with some from my dad (divorced parents). Then, dad said he would give some more, so now it looks like $40K, about half from each parent. We originally wanted around 115 people, but by the time my parents have gotten through inviting people, its looking more like 150...

The below breakdown does not include wedding rings (we are paying for them $5K?), honeymoon (using dad''s timeshare, maybe Hawaii), rehersal dinner (FI''s parents are paying, around $1500), flowergirl dress (I paid for it, $60), or bridemaids and groomsmen gifts (FI and I paid for it, around $1K total for 10 members)

Save the date cards (incl. postage): $250
Invitations: $500
Ceremony fee: $200
Ceremony Accessories (runner, flowers to throw): $200 (guessing)
Minister: $400
Flowers: Don''t know yet, still working on it
Photographer: $4,500 (incl. 6 hrs, assistant, engagement session, album, digital negatives)
DJ for ceremony, cocktail hour, and reception: $1500
Reception venue: $800
Cake: $650
Cocktail Hour and Reception food and beverage for 150 (including alcohol): $25,000
Reception lighting: $1500
Centerpieces: Don''t know yet, still working on it
Favors: $250 (guessing)
OOT Gift Bags: $400 (guessing)
Day of Planner: $850
Wedding Insurance: $350 (FL in the summer, need I say more?)
2 nights, 1 w/ 2 rooms b/4 wedding accomodations (wedding night free): $500
Photobooth: $1,000
Dress: $2700
Alterations: $250
Veil: $240
Shoes: Don''t know yet, still working on it
Jewelry: $300 (don''t want to spend more than this)
Hair and make-up: $300
Nails: $100

So, judging from this, it looks like it may be more like $45K ( not including aforementioned items), but I am not taking responsibility for the people overage. My parents just keep inviting people...ahhh! Anyway, I''m sure it will be lovely and I can''t wait till the big day!