Would you be disappointed with an eternity band as ER?

[Daisys and Diamonds]

I'm so sorry I didn't see this message until today!

My mother left behind so many interesting pieces, a few of which were valuable, most not (possibly a few?). There are a lot of turquoise and sandstone pieces, her favourite stones, as well as a lot of blue topaz and pink CZ. None of it is my style and some of it is loathsome to me in terms of aesthetics, but I actually have taken out about 30 pieces the last few weeks and have cleaned them afresh, and begun figuring out how they fit into my collection.

With regard to this thread, my mother had a gold wedding band but she had to sell it shortly after she got married to my biological father (he wasn't big on paying his share of the bills; fodder for another day). She would have a lot to say about this topic, for she loved jewelry almost as much as I do. I think it broke her heart that she never had a proper engagement ring, and that she had to sell her wedding band. She spent the rest of her life wearing random rings on her "wedding ring finger," and I notice I tend to do the same; perhaps for the same reason? -that I didn't have an engagement ring per se, either?

She had really gorgeous hands, with long tapering fingers. An eternity band would have looked amazing on her. Unfortunately she preferred to spend money on a lot of costume jewelry rather than invest in one really nice piece.

Anyway, if you're ever in Seattle, you can totally come visit and play with her ginormous assortment of pretties.

Thank you, that would be so much fun
I do love turquoise and i have a growing appreciation of topaz
our tastes and wants and needs do evolve over our lifetimes

Im sorry for your mum and her not having much fine jewlery but i hope she got fun and pleasure out of her faux pretties

I was thinking about the bits you dont like ..
Keep them for play thing's for your mom's grandchildren

My mum inherited real and fake from my great Aunty Neater, mum had zero interest in the fake but as a wee girl i got so much pleasure out of playing with all the unwanted pieces and now although im a little sad its all lost im happy it at least enjoyed a full 2nd life with little me

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

Back on topic i saw this recently but couldn't find this thread to post it on
but Queen Letizia has an eternity as an ER

 

[kb1gra]

I'd have quite liked an eternity band from my husband.

In actuality, all my bling I've bought myself. He thinks it's quite dumb and his mother never wore a ring so he isn't sentimental about it. He wore his wedding band for the four hours of our very casual reception and never again.

I like elegant and different things, so a nice emerald eternity - heck yes. But it wouldn't have meant anything to him so there wasn't a point.

However, instead, he bought me my dream. I had been working towards buying a horse that could take me to grand Prix dressage for YEARS and for various reasons, never found one. When I came home and said I'd found one, without hesitation he wrote the check. I could have bought him myself but husband didn't want me to.

And now when I wear my tails and ride that horse I know that he made that happen for me and it's worth much more than any ring.

I think it's more about the meaning than anything.

And I just bought myself a 5 stone anyway

 

[Emerald City]

Thank you, that would be so much fun
I do love turquoise and i have a growing appreciation of topaz
our tastes and wants and needs do evolve over our lifetimes

Im sorry for your mum and her not having much fine jewlery but i hope she got fun and pleasure out of her faux pretties

I was thinking about the bits you dont like ..
Keep them for play thing's for your mom's grandchildren

My mum inherited real and fake from my great Aunty Neater, mum had zero interest in the fake but as a wee girl i got so much pleasure out of playing with all the unwanted pieces and now although im a little sad its all lost im happy it at least enjoyed a full 2nd life with little me

My taste in jewelry has certainly evolved, that's for sure.

Your childhood jewelry sounds wonderful! I'd have had such fun with a treasure trove like that I'm sorry you lost them; it hurts to lose pieces, especially sentimental ones. But the memories are precious; that bleeds through the Internet loud and clear.

By the way, your Aunty Neater had the coolest name!! Was that her first name, a nickname, or a name she chose for herself?

 

[Emerald City]

I'd have quite liked an eternity band from my husband.

In actuality, all my bling I've bought myself. He thinks it's quite dumb and his mother never wore a ring so he isn't sentimental about it. He wore his wedding band for the four hours of our very casual reception and never again.

I like elegant and different things, so a nice emerald eternity - heck yes. But it wouldn't have meant anything to him so there wasn't a point.

However, instead, he bought me my dream. I had been working towards buying a horse that could take me to grand Prix dressage for YEARS and for various reasons, never found one. When I came home and said I'd found one, without hesitation he wrote the check. I could have bought him myself but husband didn't want me to.

And now when I wear my tails and ride that horse I know that he made that happen for me and it's worth much more than any ring.

I think it's more about the meaning than anything.

And I just bought myself a 5 stone anyway

*sigh* That is so romantic. You hit the jackpot, girl

 

[Emerald City]

Back on topic i saw this recently but couldn't find this thread to post it on
but Queen Letizia has an eternity as an ER

Squeal! That is exactly the kind I want for myself!!!

 

[pearaffair]

*sigh* That is so romantic. You hit the jackpot, girl

Where can I see the five stone?

 

[Emerald City]

Where can I see the five stone?

YES! We demand pictures!!

 

[pearaffair]

YES! We demand pictures!!

@kb1gra

 

[OboeGal]

I'd have quite liked an eternity band from my husband.

In actuality, all my bling I've bought myself. He thinks it's quite dumb and his mother never wore a ring so he isn't sentimental about it. He wore his wedding band for the four hours of our very casual reception and never again.

I like elegant and different things, so a nice emerald eternity - heck yes. But it wouldn't have meant anything to him so there wasn't a point.

However, instead, he bought me my dream. I had been working towards buying a horse that could take me to grand Prix dressage for YEARS and for various reasons, never found one. When I came home and said I'd found one, without hesitation he wrote the check. I could have bought him myself but husband didn't want me to.

And now when I wear my tails and ride that horse I know that he made that happen for me and it's worth much more than any ring.

I think it's more about the meaning than anything.

And I just bought myself a 5 stone anyway

Yeah, my DH is the same. He thinks jewelry is dumb and kind of materialistic - he's a Dutch boy through and through - but he did (grudgingly) buy my original wedding set. Any other jewelry I want, I have to come up with the money for (which is actually OK with me). He actually got upset when I first really got into jewelry three years ago and started getting some pieces, especially "alternate" engagement rings and bands, because he assumed I was buying them to show off - to "status signal" - and that is very much against his values. It took time and a lot of talking for him to come to understand that my values are the same as his and that I get them because of the joy I get at looking at them on my hand, as wearable art, and NOT to garner any reaction from others. It helps that I've remained a "smaller stone" gal, so he didn't see me going for something much bigger than my original one, and that he sees me stick with good quality CZ and moissy for pendants and earrings - since I don't get to look at those all day, I don't care what they look like!

Oh, my, if he would buy me a horse, though!

 

[monipod]

I am a proud owner of a full eternity band this week and I am in love. Having said that, I'm 47 and have many other pretty rings. If I remember back to 20 years ago when I got engaged, to be honest, yes I would have been disappointed in an eternity ring as an ER. I loved my solitaire and it screams 'engaged'.

I think eternity bands are actually ERs in Spain/Europe? They are beautiful but it's important that you have something that you love at the time.

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

My taste in jewelry has certainly evolved, that's for sure.

Your childhood jewelry sounds wonderful! I'd have had such fun with a treasure trove like that I'm sorry you lost them; it hurts to lose pieces, especially sentimental ones. But the memories are precious; that bleeds through the Internet loud and clear.

By the way, your Aunty Neater had the coolest name!! Was that her first name, a nickname, or a name she chose for herself?

Grandma's family all had nic names except for her (Mary Alberta) it made looking up the family tree hard to work out who was who with two generations now gone
there was an Aunty Tozz, Uncle Horrie, Aunty Pem and more weird ones i can't remember right now ( Australian family from Tasmania and Aussies always have a lot of nick names)
I inherited their mother's wedding ring from my mum
i dont think she ever wore her grandmother's ring and i didn't even know my great grandma's name but i was determed to not let her ring be unworn any longer
i knew i wouldn't wear a ring that looked like a wedding ring so i had little saphires put into the band gypsy style - one stone for each of her children - resulting in a frantic call to the jewler to add two more saphires after i found the family tree and found 2 aunts/uncles i had forgotten

Aunty Neater was Cornelia Lilly which i think is very beautiful but would have been vary old fashoned for a long time, i do wonder if she was born in King George 5's coronation year but ive lost complete track how old every one was - just old like everyone is to a 7 year old
i have Aunty Neater's ER - her and my uncle had no children of their own but must have been close to my mum's family as they got her inheritence
I was quite uncharacteristically firm with my sister that i wanted Aunty Neater's ER as i was old enough to have happy memories with her including a Christmas we spent with her before my sister was born

Her costume jewlery was fun and i had so much fun playing with it, i probably just loved it so much it broke but i had so much enjoyment from it i think thats ok
I just think someone sometime will have fun with your mom's costume jewlery and if that's a wee grandaughter or great niece or even a wee boy that would be nice for your mom's menory

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

Squeal! That is exactly the kind I want for myself!!!

The Spanish royals have fabulous jewles and Queen Letizia always looks very stylish and beautuful

 

[Emerald City]

Grandma's family all had nic names except for her (Mary Alberta) it made looking up the family tree hard to work out who was who with two generations now gone
there was an Aunty Tozz, Uncle Horrie, Aunty Pem and more weird ones i can't remember right now ( Australian family from Tasmania and Aussies always have a lot of nick names)
I inherited their mother's wedding ring from my mum
i dont think she ever wore her grandmother's ring and i didn't even know my great grandma's name but i was determed to not let her ring be unworn any longer
i knew i wouldn't wear a ring that looked like a wedding ring so i had little saphires put into the band gypsy style - one stone for each of her children - resulting in a frantic call to the jewler to add two more saphires after i found the family tree and found 2 aunts/uncles i had forgotten

Aunty Neater was Cornelia Lilly which i think is very beautiful but would have been vary old fashoned for a long time, i do wonder if she was born in King George 5's coronation year but ive lost complete track how old every one was - just old like everyone is to a 7 year old
i have Aunty Neater's ER - her and my uncle had no children of their own but must have been close to my mum's family as they got her inheritence
I was quite uncharacteristically firm with my sister that i wanted Aunty Neater's ER as i was old enough to have happy memories with her including a Christmas we spent with her before my sister was born

Her costume jewlery was fun and i had so much fun playing with it, i probably just loved it so much it broke but i had so much enjoyment from it i think thats ok
I just think someone sometime will have fun with your mom's costume jewlery and if that's a wee grandaughter or great niece or even a wee boy that would be nice for your mom's menory

Your post was heartwarming to read; it left a smile on my face. Your family sounds very sweet and full of life and fun to be around. I have to admit that my family was highly dysfunctional and abusive; my mother certainly had a rough time of it, but she took it out on me. That's why it is so hard for me to integrate her belongings into my life. I could deal with wearing things that aren't my style - I hate the diamond cluster ring she had, as a matter of fact, but I'd wear it anyway if we'd had a better relationship. Every piece she had reminds me of the loathing she had for me that was often plain on her face, the accompaniment to the way she treated me.

My mother never inherited her mother's pieces; while my grandmother was in the hospital for dementia, her niece / my mother's cousin stole all the jewelry and other valuables - she ransacked the house, actually. I'm not even sure of all the pieces my grandmother had. I remember a 5-stone ring and a gold wedding band, but I was too young to really pay attention to her jewelry. I wish I had those pieces. They rightfully belonged to my mother and then to me. I sometimes wonder - did she have an engagement ring? Did she even want one? She got married at 15 in 1935, and I don't think anybody had much money to speak of. My grandmother was German, the first generation in her family born on American soil, which I guess contributed to the poverty she grew up in. She NEVER spoke of her childhood or young adulthood, so I imagine things were pretty bad.

Unfortunately there are no grandchildren and there probably aren't going to be any. It's not what I wanted, but I had accepted things and learned to enjoy my life thoroughly. Then I got injured and that wrecked everything. I really love the thought of a wee one playing with my mother's jewelry. There was the possibility that we might adopt, but that has been put on hold as seeking care for my injuries and dealing with the fallout from that has taken center stage, and rightfully so.

My invitation to come and look through my mother's collection still stands.

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

Your post was heartwarming to read; it left a smile on my face. Your family sounds very sweet and full of life and fun to be around. I have to admit that my family was highly dysfunctional and abusive; my mother certainly had a rough time of it, but she took it out on me. That's why it is so hard for me to integrate her belongings into my life. I could deal with wearing things that aren't my style - I hate the diamond cluster ring she had, as a matter of fact, but I'd wear it anyway if we'd had a better relationship. Every piece she had reminds me of the loathing she had for me that was often plain on her face, the accompaniment to the way she treated me.

My mother never inherited her mother's pieces; while my grandmother was in the hospital for dementia, her niece / my mother's cousin stole all the jewelry and other valuables - she ransacked the house, actually. I'm not even sure of all the pieces my grandmother had. I remember a 5-stone ring and a gold wedding band, but I was too young to really pay attention to her jewelry. I wish I had those pieces. They rightfully belonged to my mother and then to me. I sometimes wonder - did she have an engagement ring? Did she even want one? She got married at 15 in 1935, and I don't think anybody had much money to speak of. My grandmother was German, the first generation in her family born on American soil, which I guess contributed to the poverty she grew up in. She NEVER spoke of her childhood or young adulthood, so I imagine things were pretty bad.

Unfortunately there are no grandchildren and there probably aren't going to be any. It's not what I wanted, but I had accepted things and learned to enjoy my life thoroughly. Then I got injured and that wrecked everything. I really love the thought of a wee one playing with my mother's jewelry. There was the possibility that we might adopt, but that has been put on hold as seeking care for my injuries and dealing with the fallout from that has taken center stage, and rightfully so.

My invitation to come and look through my mother's collection still stands.

Why thank you Emerald city

But also Oh so much saddness @Emerald City


actually (some of) mum's family were psyco,(mum and grandms too probably) being brethren didn't help matters either but i have nice memories of my grandma and great aunty

im sorry to read you got injuried and your plans are on hold but when the time is right things will come right

That is really bad about your mom's cousin
death and illness can bring out the worse in people - my mum was the only daughter yet things got horrible with a DIL when grandma died so i made a real effort that my sister and i would not fight when mum died despite us not getting on at all well
i feel honoured to have my great grandmother's wedding ring because they had big families in those days and there are alot of female descendants

On a different subject it is nice to dream of overseas travel again durring this uncertain time
Your part of the world is fascinating

 

[kb1gra]

@kb1gra

I'm eagerly awaiting the arrival, and when it gets here I'll be sure to share pics

In the meantime, here is the horse-that's-not-an-engagement-ring



ETA: literally five minutes after I posted, the pre-ship pics came through for the five stone so here is my new 5 stone, with 5, ~.30 E/F cushions (all very close to 4mm diagonal):

 

[Emerald City]

Why thank you Emerald city

But also Oh so much saddness @Emerald City


actually (some of) mum's family were psyco,(mum and grandms too probably) being brethren didn't help matters either but i have nice memories of my grandma and great aunty

im sorry to read you got injuried and your plans are on hold but when the time is right things will come right

That is really bad about your mom's cousin
death and illness can bring out the worse in people - my mum was the only daughter yet things got horrible with a DIL when grandma died so i made a real effort that my sister and i would not fight when mum died despite us not getting on at all well
i feel honoured to have my great grandmother's wedding ring because they had big families in those days and there are alot of female descendants

On a different subject it is nice to dream of overseas travel again durring this uncertain time
Your part of the world is fascinating

I have had a lot of sadness in my life, but my husband has been the best thing to ever happen to me (aside from his misunderstandings about jewelry, lol). He and I have been very happy and I learned to move on and let go of a lot of the pain I carried for years from my upbringing and the associated abuse. You can't let go of all of it, of course, but I learned to be happy and live for the day, which is in itself a huge accomplishment. I have zero contact with any of my relatives and things are much better this way.

Death really does bring out the worst in people. When my mother was ill, and had only days to live, my brother came to me demanding that I return the earrings he and his wife had purchased for my mother to wear to their wedding. I was gobsmacked. I would never behave that way in a million years and I don't understand those who do. For that matter, my mother's brother stole the rest of the inheritance my grandparents left - almost $1 million USD - so I've had a lot of practise with dealing with theft and bad, bad people. The people who should most feel shame never seem to have the capacity to do so.

I would dearly love to travel to your side of the world! It is so hard for me to even ride in a car that that is not going to happen with my back the way it is. I miss travel so much. It was my favourite thing in the world besides my husband, beloved even more than jewelry. Going someplace new, exploring the food and local offerings, talking to locals and seeing a slice of their viewpoint on the world. I've traveled extensively around the world and I miss it so much.

Have you ever been to the States?

 

[Emerald City]

I'm eagerly awaiting the arrival, and when it gets here I'll be sure to share pics

In the meantime, here is the horse-that's-not-an-engagement-ring



ETA: literally five minutes after I posted, the pre-ship pics came through for the five stone so here is my new 5 stone, with 5, ~.30 E/F cushions (all very close to 4mm diagonal):

So pretty! Your horse and the ring both! Your horse has very sweet eyes. Those stones look huge, sheesh. When did you learn to ride? Is it true that if you don't learn as a child, you'll never be proficient at it? (Someone told me that when I was around 20 and looking to learn to ride.)

 

[kb1gra]

So pretty! Your horse and the ring both! Your horse has very sweet eyes. Those stones look huge, sheesh. When did you learn to ride? Is it true that if you don't learn as a child, you'll never be proficient at it? (Someone told me that when I was around 20 and looking to learn to ride.)

Not at all. I've been riding since I was around 10, but I took quite a bit of time off from around age 17 to 25. I'm now 32 and got serious about really competing and getting to the top about five years ago, when I had the funds. I got this horse two years ago.

I know lots of people who learned to ride as an adult. If you have the time to get in the saddle a lot, you'll be as good as anyone else who put in the time. Lots of amateur dressage riders are in their 40s and 50s.

The stones look huge but that's a feature of zoom video they're about the size of .25 rounds.

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

I have had a lot of sadness in my life, but my husband has been the best thing to ever happen to me (aside from his misunderstandings about jewelry, lol). He and I have been very happy and I learned to move on and let go of a lot of the pain I carried for years from my upbringing and the associated abuse. You can't let go of all of it, of course, but I learned to be happy and live for the day, which is in itself a huge accomplishment. I have zero contact with any of my relatives and things are much better this way.

Death really does bring out the worst in people. When my mother was ill, and had only days to live, my brother came to me demanding that I return the earrings he and his wife had purchased for my mother to wear to their wedding. I was gobsmacked. I would never behave that way in a million years and I don't understand those who do. For that matter, my mother's brother stole the rest of the inheritance my grandparents left - almost $1 million USD - so I've had a lot of practise with dealing with theft and bad, bad people. The people who should most feel shame never seem to have the capacity to do so.

I would dearly love to travel to your side of the world! It is so hard for me to even ride in a car that that is not going to happen with my back the way it is. I miss travel so much. It was my favourite thing in the world besides my husband, beloved even more than jewelry. Going someplace new, exploring the food and local offerings, talking to locals and seeing a slice of their viewpoint on the world. I've traveled extensively around the world and I miss it so much.

Have you ever been to the States?

Saddly not really - just in transit
i did go outside and walk on the footpath outside LAX as i had to go in and out of customs - i wish i had taken a taxi out to the beach because i was in transit all day but i was traveling alone to Canada (to see Bruce Springsteen with my friend who lived in Maine) and i didn't know what to do
LAX was terrible - i beleave its had an update but Air NZ used the oldest crapiest terminal

6 months ago i would have said a cruise would be a nice option for you to holiday but i don't see the cruise industry returning to any kind of normal anytime soon and who would want to risk it ?!

Your country is amazing and i don't care who's in the white house, in that ill still love it
I have read and seen lots of great things about Seattle
If you have to be stuck somewhere and can't travel at least it looks a great place to live

honestly families really sux for some of us
that's really dreadful about your mom's money, i bet that would have made her life a whole lot eaiser with some of that money

i text my sister about 4 times a year - usually if either of us have earthquakes, but that's about it, not even birthdays or Christmas, and that might have made dad sad but we're ok with it.

I remember answering the phone after grandma died and my aunty (mum's brother's wife) mistook me for mum and swore and yelled at me down the phone
i have since learnt a whole tonn of stuff went down
the undertaker said if he had not grown up with mum's family he would have walked away as my uncle made such a huge fuss in his office

my grandma spent her last year in the care of the nuns thanks to mum's other SIL being a nurse at their really lovelly new hospital
The nuns had asked if we would like to have grandma's Methodist funneral at their chapel, everyone thought this was lovelly except this one uncle
It even resulted in the mother superior asking my nurse aunty - employee/ employer relationship - were they not good enough for our family?
my poor aunty was mortified
The nuns had found room for grandma when all other options were trully horrible
The nuns did everything they could for my grandma and insured her last year she was not just safe and well looked after but also had dignity and love and my uncle was so disrespectful and his wife was awful, the nuns didnt try to convert us i honestly don't know what the problem waw especially as when grandma first went in there grandad was still alive and was fine with the nuns

This one bad aunty took things that should have gone to my cousin as the oldest grandaughter or my mum as the only daughter
Just a horrible time

at least as grown ups we can choose to have nothing to do with these kind of relatives

 

[Emerald City]

Not at all. I've been riding since I was around 10, but I took quite a bit of time off from around age 17 to 25. I'm now 32 and got serious about really competing and getting to the top about five years ago, when I had the funds. I got this horse two years ago.

I know lots of people who learned to ride as an adult. If you have the time to get in the saddle a lot, you'll be as good as anyone else who put in the time. Lots of amateur dressage riders are in their 40s and 50s.

The stones look huge but that's a feature of zoom video they're about the size of .25 rounds.

I'm really impressed with your accomplishments! If/When my back gets better, this is now on my bucket list.

Your ring looks absolutely breathtaking. Is there another ring you're going to wear it with, or will it be the star player? I have to say, it's fabulous enough to be a statement piece on its own!

 

[Emerald City]

Saddly not really - just in transit
i did go outside and walk on the footpath outside LAX as i had to go in and out of customs - i wish i had taken a taxi out to the beach because i was in transit all day but i was traveling alone to Canada (to see Bruce Springsteen with my friend who lived in Maine) and i didn't know what to do
LAX was terrible - i beleave its had an update but Air NZ used the oldest crapiest terminal

6 months ago i would have said a cruise would be a nice option for you to holiday but i don't see the cruise industry returning to any kind of normal anytime soon and who would want to risk it ?!

Your country is amazing and i don't care who's in the white house, in that ill still love it
I have read and seen lots of great things about Seattle
If you have to be stuck somewhere and can't travel at least it looks a great place to live

honestly families really sux for some of us
that's really dreadful about your mom's money, i bet that would have made her life a whole lot eaiser with some of that money

i text my sister about 4 times a year - usually if either of us have earthquakes, but that's about it, not even birthdays or Christmas, and that might have made dad sad but we're ok with it.

I remember answering the phone after grandma died and my aunty (mum's brother's wife) mistook me for mum and swore and yelled at me down the phone
i have since learnt a whole tonn of stuff went down
the undertaker said if he had not grown up with mum's family he would have walked away as my uncle made such a huge fuss in his office

my grandma spent her last year in the care of the nuns thanks to mum's other SIL being a nurse at their really lovelly new hospital
The nuns had asked if we would like to have grandma's Methodist funneral at their chapel, everyone thought this was lovelly except this one uncle
It even resulted in the mother superior asking my nurse aunty - employee/ employer relationship - were they not good enough for our family?
my poor aunty was mortified
The nuns had found room for grandma when all other options were trully horrible
The nuns did everything they could for my grandma and insured her last year she was not just safe and well looked after but also had dignity and love and my uncle was so disrespectful and his wife was awful, the nuns didnt try to convert us i honestly don't know what the problem waw especially as when grandma first went in there grandad was still alive and was fine with the nuns

This one bad aunty took things that should have gone to my cousin as the oldest grandaughter or my mum as the only daughter
Just a horrible time

at least as grown ups we can choose to have nothing to do with these kind of relatives

Your time at LAX reminds me of my "trip to Germany." I flew from ATL to LHR via Frankfurt, and I spent a few hours in the airport before flying on to London. That's the extent of my time in Germany. I speak German (I read it better than I speak it, actually) and I have really wanted to go to Germany and poke around. Sadly it has never happened. Germany is an amazing place with a rich cultural heritage, and a lot of old sites.

Reading what happened around your grandmother's death made me sad and angry. I'm so sorry that happened to you. Some families have a lot of dark skeletons in their closets; ours are apparently among them. Things happened in my family that I cannot bring myself to share with other people. I really feel that people with horribly abusive families, who manage to somehow rise above and become good people despite their backgrounds, don't get enough credit from society at large. You've already missed out on a childhood; you've been an adult since you were small. Others don't understand it but we do. And yes, it is very freeing as an adult to cut ties to abusive relatives. There is no point in maintaining contact with people who hurt me so deeply and with such obvious relish. The only good thing I have to say about my birth father was that he made sure I received my mother's jewelry, and I am deeply grateful for that; but it does not remotely make up for his horrific behaviour, which has remained unchanged since I have known him. My brother's wife stole some of my mother's belongings while she was dying in the hospital. I could write a book about her behaviour during that time, but I'd prefer to forget it. Let's just say that I refuse to think of her as my SIL; she's just "my brother's wife."

I actually lost out on two family fortunes; lucky me! My father's family has a great deal of money but it was left to my father's sisters. C'est la vie, I guess.

I don't want to threadjack anymore, though I would dearly love to talk to you more about this elsewhere!! (Is there a way to do that?) Do you have any photos of the sapphire ring you mentioned? I'm rather curious to see it! It sounds lovely

 

[kb1gra]

I'm really impressed with your accomplishments! If/When my back gets better, this is now on my bucket list.

Your ring looks absolutely breathtaking. Is there another ring you're going to wear it with, or will it be the star player? I have to say, it's fabulous enough to be a statement piece on its own!

It goes with my xs cartier trinity (the band I got married with) as my "understated bling" look that I've been into with all this working from home.

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

Your time at LAX reminds me of my "trip to Germany." I flew from ATL to LHR via Frankfurt, and I spent a few hours in the airport before flying on to London. That's the extent of my time in Germany. I speak German (I read it better than I speak it, actually) and I have really wanted to go to Germany and poke around. Sadly it has never happened. Germany is an amazing place with a rich cultural heritage, and a lot of old sites.

Reading what happened around your grandmother's death made me sad and angry. I'm so sorry that happened to you. Some families have a lot of dark skeletons in their closets; ours are apparently among them. Things happened in my family that I cannot bring myself to share with other people. I really feel that people with horribly abusive families, who manage to somehow rise above and become good people despite their backgrounds, don't get enough credit from society at large. You've already missed out on a childhood; you've been an adult since you were small. Others don't understand it but we do. And yes, it is very freeing as an adult to cut ties to abusive relatives. There is no point in maintaining contact with people who hurt me so deeply and with such obvious relish. The only good thing I have to say about my birth father was that he made sure I received my mother's jewelry, and I am deeply grateful for that; but it does not remotely make up for his horrific behaviour, which has remained unchanged since I have known him. My brother's wife stole some of my mother's belongings while she was dying in the hospital. I could write a book about her behaviour during that time, but I'd prefer to forget it. Let's just say that I refuse to think of her as my SIL; she's just "my brother's wife."

I actually lost out on two family fortunes; lucky me! My father's family has a great deal of money but it was left to my father's sisters. C'est la vie, I guess.

I don't want to threadjack anymore, though I would dearly love to talk to you more about this elsewhere!! (Is there a way to do that?) Do you have any photos of the sapphire ring you mentioned? I'm rather curious to see it! It sounds lovely

Have you seen Missy's thread about childhod - a sentsitive topic
I don't know how to do a link
That's a shame about Germany
in an idea world we should have had propper lay overs -
Ill post greatgranny's ring after - i have to out for a bit
Ill tag you

My cat is offering you a specially prepaired warm paper bag to send to your brother's wife
Families really can be a nasty bit of work

 

[arkieb1]

In my 20s I probably would have been disappointed, now I think I'd care more about the person I was with and the quality of the relationship than the actual ring.

 

[GearGirly]

I would LOVE to have a big chunky eternity or half eternity for an engagement ring. Maybe because I’m older, maybe because I have some beautiful stones I’ve collected, but I think it would be very chic.

 

[MRBXXXFVVS1]

Thanks for everyone's perspective! I guess what I was wondering is if all else is equal and you could have a more traditional ER vs. eternity band (assuming budget accommodates either), whether you'd be disappointed that you didn't get the more traditional ER?

Lately, from a "trend" perspective, I've seen a lot of 3 stone rings, 5/7 stone rings, and eternity bands. But maybe it's because I spend a lot of time on PS and looking at diamond related things!

 

[AllAboardTheBlingTrain]

Thanks for everyone's perspective! I guess what I was wondering is if all else is equal and you could have a more traditional ER vs. eternity band (assuming budget accommodates either), whether you'd be disappointed that you didn't get the more traditional ER?

Lately, from a "trend" perspective, I've seen a lot of 3 stone rings, 5/7 stone rings, and eternity bands. But maybe it's because I spend a lot of time on PS and looking at diamond related things!

For me, yes, I don’t like multiple stone rings (except possibly a 7 stone but not for an engagement ring). I like the look of a big chunky eternity (though the whole sizing inconvenience is a PITA) but to me it’s a ring, not an engagement ring. It’s good for bling but not something I’d necessarily wear everyday.

It’s an absolute pet peeve but I just do not like the 3 stone look, I’ve seen it done well but I don’t like it for myself. I feel like it competes. I know that it’s a popular engagement ring style, but it’s not for me. I like solitaires or halos only.

 

[MRBXXXFVVS1]

For me, yes, I don’t like multiple stone rings (except possibly a 7 stone but not for an engagement ring). I like the look of a big chunky eternity (though the whole sizing inconvenience is a PITA) but to me it’s a ring, not an engagement ring. It’s good for bling but not something I’d necessarily wear everyday.

It’s an absolute pet peeve but I just do not like the 3 stone look, I’ve seen it done well but I don’t like it for myself. I feel like it competes. I know that it’s a popular engagement ring style, but it’s not for me. I like solitaires or halos only.

I love my round solitaire engagement ring and wouldn't want it any other way. But I wouldn't mind a fancy shape (emerald), 3 stone (cushion with round side stones), and chunky halo for alternate ERs!

 

[Emerald City]

Have you seen Missy's thread about childhod - a sentsitive topic
I don't know how to do a link
That's a shame about Germany
in an idea world we should have had propper lay overs -
Ill post greatgranny's ring after - i have to out for a bit
Ill tag you

My cat is offering you a specially prepaired warm paper bag to send to your brother's wife
Families really can be a nasty bit of work

I haven't seen that thread, but I'll look for it. I bet it is therapeutic for a lot of people, to have a space to write about their experiences. Thank you for mentioning it

I really look forward to seeing pictures of your great grandmother's ring!! Sorry for omitting the 'great' in my request; I should read more carefully!

I would most gratefully accept your cat's warm offer. Lord knows that woman deserves some... warmth.