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2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her with??

Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

Thanks everyone for the responsive replies! Please keep it coming- you can't hurt my feelings in cyberspace!

So after a good nights sleep- Ring setting- defiantly after the engagement now. I think it ruins the surprise if she starts looking at setting beforehand, but I am taking everyone's comments seriously and I don't want to put her into the situation of liking it only bc I chose it.

Diamond choice- I'm still going to pick this one myself, and get a temp setting. Any comments on temp settings? This is where she loves my uniqueness, but again the overwhelming consensus here is get more intel! So I think I'm going to risk the friend's route, and ask about shapes ONLY. I still may lean towards fancy, but maybe I bring the marquise down to a oval per others suggestions. I'll get more intel, that's for sure- worth the risk at this point.

Some wanted to know background- She's German, I'm American, family and friends are all over the globe. I'm spontaneous and like to things a bit differently, she loves that as things are always an adventure between us. She has big hand, average length (not skinny hands, not chubby). She likes color, loves the fancy yellow diamond earrings I got her when we first started dating. (How crazy would a fancy yellow e-ring be? I'm not that crazy, or am I?). Her cosmetic rings all have a bit of bling (small halos), nothing too much. Age is early 30's.

Technically, I haven't hear much, other than I need to see it and not trust numbers with fancys. Does that thought apply to Princess cuts as well?

Thanks and keep those comments coming!
KamanCali
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

some paralysis, but maybe that's good. Thanks for the comments!
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

kamancali|1311806526|2978342 said:
Thanks everyone for the responsive replies! Please keep it coming- you can't hurt my feelings in cyberspace!

So after a good nights sleep- Ring setting- defiantly after the engagement now. I think it ruins the surprise if she starts looking at setting beforehand, but I am taking everyone's comments seriously and I don't want to put her into the situation of liking it only bc I chose it.

Diamond choice- I'm still going to pick this one myself, and get a temp setting. Any comments on temp settings? This is where she loves my uniqueness, but again the overwhelming consensus here is get more intel! So I think I'm going to risk the friend's route, and ask about shapes ONLY. I still may lean towards fancy, but maybe I bring the marquise down to a oval per others suggestions. I'll get more intel, that's for sure- worth the risk at this point.

Some wanted to know background- She's German, I'm American, family and friends are all over the globe. I'm spontaneous and like to things a bit differently, she loves that as things are always an adventure between us. She has big hand, average length (not skinny hands, not chubby). She likes color, loves the fancy yellow diamond earrings I got her when we first started dating. (How crazy would a fancy yellow e-ring be? I'm not that crazy, or am I?). Her cosmetic rings all have a bit of bling (small halos), nothing too much. Age is early 30's.

Technically, I haven't hear much, other than I need to see it and not trust numbers with fancys. Does that thought apply to Princess cuts as well?

Thanks and keep those comments coming!
KamanCali
Click to expand...

Good call. When I lived in Germany, none of the engaged/married women I knew wore engagement rings so your girlfriend may not have a preconceived notion of what an engagement ring should look like. A lot of us are Americans so we're coming from the American woman's point of view which may not be valid for her. For an American woman, I'd say the yellow diamond is a risky choice, for a German woman, see what her friends say. Here the engagement ring is a big, important symbol but over there, its not. They tend to think of rings as just another piece of jewelry so a yellow diamond ring as long as it goes with what she already has could conceivably work. I'd still check with her friends first.

And BTW, I wouldn't get a temp setting. That forces her hand so that she HAS to choose a new setting.
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

Okay so given what you've posted. I'm going to go out on a limb and post what I would suggest for an engagement ring IF you do some recon to see if she's amenable to it.

http://www.thediamond.com/cgi-local/SoftCart.exe/cgi-local/smpagegen.exe?EU+scstore+abcd12346789+-p+-c+scstore.cfg+fansur-73#..... Is a yellow diamond with lots of potential (get more pictures and an ASET). It's not two carats, but two carats is a LOT of bling. Especially for a European woman.


And this is a setting suggestion. If you can have one of her friends show her this pic and get her thoughts... if she likes it, it would be a very lovely ring. Especially for someone with hands on the larger side, as you've said she has, this would be a beautiful ring.

app_full_proxy.php.jpg
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

I'm going to agree with the many others here that I think an E-W Marquis is too risky to buy her for an unexpected proposal. The Marquis shape is a very particular style...one that I think people tend to love or hate. Same with east-west settings. I personally love the right stone set east west but I don't like a marquis cut (no matter how big I would not want one for myself).

If you are into getting her a stone that is a bit different, and you know she likes yellow diamonds, why not consider a yellow diamond engagement ring in a more traditional shape (like oval, radiant or cushion)?

Here are a few just as examples:

http://www.markbroumand.com/product/350ct-Fancy-Light-Yellow-Cushion-Cut-Diamond-Engagement-Anniversary-Ring__2116-1D9477625.aspx

http://rockdiamond.com/index.php/jewelry/loose-diamond-180ct-radiant-cut-fancy-yellow-vvs2-gia-beautiful-crushed-ice-r3311

And one of the most amazing E-W rings I have laid eyes on on PS (up for sale!):

http://jewelsbyericagrace.smugmug.com/Jewelry/Rings-Antique-diamonds/246ct-LightYellow-Diamond-Leon/14435153_QZEZg#1070675412_4YZzW

Good luck!
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

I just don't understand why a piece of jewelry that will be possibly worn for the rest of her life needs to be a surprise. It feels very... 1950's to me. There have been many polls on this site and most women PREFER to help with the ring.

I think even a regular set marquise is still a little eccentric in 2011. Maybe not in the 80's.. but yes, 2011 is about rounds, cushions and princess cuts.

I should note though that these are generalizations ... I mean, obviously if she loves marquise or wants to be surprised.. or loves yellow diamonds- then you should go for it! But if you are just basing it off of what YOU want... eh..
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

LGK said:
http://www.jewelsbyericagrace.com/modern_and_estate_jewelry_page_2 ? The last one on the page? E/W set oval, yellow diamond, amazing Leon setting... OK I could get behind that as a surprise :naughty:
Click to expand...

Oh my goodness, I normally don't like marquises and ovals set E/W but I would be thrilled to receive that!!!!! And whattaya know, its just my size :Up_to_something:
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

kamancali|1311806662|2978343 said:
some paralysis, but maybe that's good. Thanks for the comments!
Click to expand...

Good to get some insight. Please be aware that almost anyone on PS is either: curious about jewelry; passionate about jewelry, meticulous about data and learning to mitigate risk and to make the right decisions (me, maybe you?).

Even then from a very small sample size, it is obvious that 80% of everyone here received their rings in a consultative process. It is fun for the girls to pick and choose and dream and build in their head (caveat: if she is a jewelry fan, not everyone is. Especially here in my culture/country. Less than 1 in 4 are I think ~ very random guess on my part) and nitpick and fuss and finally end up with a ring of their dreams! But for the other 20%, they were surprised. Half of those that are surprised hated being surprised. The other half loved it. And only 1 in 20 of the ones that were consulted actually wished they had a surprise.

So if you are playing the numbers in the American audience - consultative is the safe way to go.

However, where you are - in Germany, things may be different. I DO think that EW marquise is a bit out there. Big bling (I consider 2ct big) is a personality statement. So if you got Big Bling wrong, it is a big wrong statement.

I'm sorry - there is a chance she would be over the moon about your idea, and love it for itself, not for you (the ring I mean). But the chances are slim because there are a lot of risks. 1) Marquise is a rare shape, as it is a niche choice 2) EW is a niche setting style 3) 2ct is a large size. In the USA this might pass unregarded. But in Germany it might occasion comment?

Does she CARE about jewelry? Does she take a long time to accessorise? Does she even wear rings now? Does she shop for rings? Did she ever comment on how beautiful portia's ring was? There is usually a type of woman that would love a surprise ring, and one that would love to be consulted. If she lingers on wedding gowns, or is very attentive to her friends when they get married at the wedding. If she makes comments on her friends wedding rings in passing or in detail to you (like, dislike, too big etc) she's probably not the best to surprise. If she just says how beautiful everything is at weddings and honestly means it, then she might like a good surprise.

If I were you, I would get a beautiful yellow diamond of a modest size (1-1.5ct) and a good face up quality and size appearance. It might remind her of the time you first started dating, and culminate in the time that you decide to stop dating her, and marry her for life. Your wife is afterall your last ex-gf. ;) Then if you are confident on her style of ring, get a matching setting, if you are not, propose with the stone just the way you would with the ring, just that you can't put it on her finger. You can unveil the whole box and everything. Just that inside there will be a beautiful stone, not a ring. It should be just as overwhelming as a surprise, but low risk in terms of setting style.

Just a few thoughts. :D good luck.
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

stargurl78|1311823042|2978598 said:
LGK said:
http://www.jewelsbyericagrace.com/modern_and_estate_jewelry_page_2 ? The last one on the page? E/W set oval, yellow diamond, amazing Leon setting... OK I could get behind that as a surprise :naughty:
Click to expand...

Oh my goodness, I normally don't like marquises and ovals set E/W but I would be thrilled to receive that!!!!! And whattaya know, its just my size :Up_to_something:
Click to expand...


I gotta say, don't stone me to death, but I have never really liked that ring.I can see it's appeal, but if I had the money and the desire to get a yellow diamond ring that one would be VERY low down on my list. And I think it's just as, if not more, risky as an east west marquise. It's got a yellow diamond that's light yellow (some people don't like that color, and prefer a more saturated shade. I'm not one of them, but I know others are), in an east west setting. With a weird split halo thing going on. It's just a very busy ring, IMO.

I think it's "unique" and "takes a special person to carry it off".... which is kinda to be avoided with surprise rings. Plus it's a size 4. It doesn't sound like the OP's lady is within slightly sizable range of a 4.
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

Since you are going the friend route and want to keep it a surprise. I would suggest asking friends if they ALREADY know what shape she likes or if they think she will like a particular shape. I recently had to try to figure out a sneaky way to ask a friend what type of diamond she wanted and she totally figured it out and asked her fiance. I knew that would happen as you can't just randomly talk diamond shape without raising some suspicions.
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

Only 3 people in the world can keep a secret. Unfortunately one of them passed on a while ago, the other is nowhere to be found, and the third is yourself. Unless you told someone. Which makes it 2 people.

If you want to ask, rather than asking a friend - I think you can just be a bit more pointed in the way you question her without trying to raise suspicions.

As an example: email yourself from a different email account an article about that celebrity e-ring you adore with an attachment talking about the recent uncertainty of the American market. You can make a comment like: "can you believe some celebrities? They are spending huge amounts of money on OTT weddings and engagements at a time when the average wage earner is concerned about putting food on the table. But at least the ring looks nice"

If she leans over to peek at the ring on the email (or try to get her to peek over) unless she's an economics major, or even then, it would 99% be to critique the ring for herself. See if you can get her to comment on it. Try to make it THE celeb e-ring with the elements that you want to go for in your own idea. Then brush off the conversation and talk about regular stuff.

Or make a comment about a friend's ring if they recently got married after a dinner together and see if you can get her to say what she likes.

I dunno, but you can try stuff like this if you are not in a particular hurry to collate more information.

If you ask a friend, she'll definitely hear about it. Just a matter of time.
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

Kamancali: How long has she been in the USA and how "american" is she usually?
I am from France and living in the USA and let me tell you, the engagement ring culture is completely different. I only know one young couple from Germany and they only wear plain yellow gold bands, no diamonds.

Here are the main differences that I can perceive; I am assuming Germany to be quite similar to France in that respect:
1. If people even own diamonds, they are usually much smaller. Colored gemstones and heirloom pieces are much more common for engagement rings. My 1ct stands out when I go back home. By a lot. My cousin's 2ct sapphire ring is in a bank vault, permanently. So she may be uncomfortable with a 2ct.... But it depends on how long she has been in the US. The longer I'm in the states, and the more comfortable I become with the idea of a larger stone... :devil:
2. Setting, setting, setting. A nice, original, well-made setting in 18K or platinum is important. There is more emphasis on the setting and craftsmanship rather than on the size of the stone.
3. Shopping together after the proposal is a standard. Maybe we're just more pragmatic? It was absolutely shocking to me that here most men pick the ring before the proposal, without much input from their girlfriend. I know things are different on PS, but most of my US friends did not have input and did not want to have input. It was a BIG struggle for me to accept as the norm. Back home, it is seen as the sign of a healthy relationship, a collaborative project, to get a ring together (and also, design it...)

Have you ever talked about surprise engagement rings? As in, made a comment about a friend or something you see on TV? I think it wouldn't be too much to actually ask her. Do you have any recently/soon-to-be engaged friends you could use as a conversation starter? She may expect a ringless proposal followed by shopping/designing of the ring together.

A final comment: Size and surprise factor aside, I would actually be more comfortable getting her a E-W marquise knowing she is European.
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

I wanted to add that out of a marquise or an oval, marquise would win hands down for me. I really dislike ovals. Love pretty much every other shape out there though. Marquise and pear are two shapes that supposed to look larger than they actually are for some reason.
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

I'd say vsc is absolutely right except in Germany I didn't see any engagement rings. Lots of jewelry though: good metal craftsmanship is VERY important and they're willing to pay for it.

To be honest, I think the safest bet is to get her a ring that goes with her yellow diamond earrings for the simple reason that you know she loves the earrings. And make sure the metal craftsmanship is very good. You can present it to her in the manner of 'I thought you'd like this better but if you want a traditional American-style engagement ring, we can do that instead. No problem.' Make it casual. She's a German, she should have NO problem being honest with you. ;)

The diamond in this ring may be too large at 1.21 carat but its a really nice ring.

http://rockdiamond.com/index.php/jewelry/halo-diamond-ring-121ct-fancy-light-yellow-cushion-stunning-micro-pave-platinum-gia-r3721

This is a smaller diamond at 0.42 carat but the shade of yellow is not as prominent. It has the advantage of fitting flush with a normal wedding band so you don't have to get a special band to go with it. She may prefer to wear her e-ring and wb on different hands though so I wouldn't worry too much about that. It has too much metal showing for most American tastes but depending on what her tastes are, she may like it better. As I said, the Germans are into metal.

http://rockdiamond.com/index.php/jewelry/diamond-halo-ring-42ct-n-vs1-daussi-cushion-cut-diamond-soft-yellow-color-r3644

Just go with what you KNOW she likes from her existing jewelry.

EDITED TO ADD: One thing I would NOT do is sacrifice the quality of the setting to get a larger diamond. There may be some German women who opt for a cheaper setting to get a larger stone but you're running against cultural norms by going that route. If she wants to go the 'Americanized' route then let her tell you.
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

Just agreeing with others that a marquise cut is too eccentric on its own, nevermind the ew setting. Marquise cuts by the way were popular in the 80s and I think some people still view that shape as out of style. I think it is a great shape, but only for certain rings. That Leon is beautiful, but not for me. It is funny though because I would love to own at least 80% of his rings! Consult your fiance on the ring - you can make the engagement meaningful and a surprise. My husband let me pick out my ring and I'm so happy that he did because he had in mind a shape that I don't really care for!
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

Gypsy said:
I gotta say, don't stone me to death, but I have never really liked that ring.I can see it's appeal, but if I had the money and the desire to get a yellow diamond ring that one would be VERY low down on my list. And I think it's just as, if not more, risky as an east west marquise. It's got a yellow diamond that's light yellow (some people don't like that color, and prefer a more saturated shade. I'm not one of them, but I know others are), in an east west setting. With a weird split halo thing going on. It's just a very busy ring, IMO.

I think it's "unique" and "takes a special person to carry it off".... which is kinda to be avoided with surprise rings. Plus it's a size 4. It doesn't sound like the OP's lady is within slightly sizable range of a 4.
Click to expand...

Don't worry, I won't stone ya :saint: I can see why some wouldn't like it as I normally don't like E/W settings and the split halo thing is a bit different. I definitely agree that this would not be a good choice for a surprise e-ring. I was just thinking if my husband wanted to surprise me with this as a gift for a RHR, I probably wouldn't mind :bigsmile:

ETA: Back to the OP's original question, I really don't think a big E/W marquise is a good choice for a surprise e-ring. I don't even know if I would buy an oval or marquise in a temporary setting to propose with and pick out the setting later, unless you know for sure she likes those shapes of stones. What about proposing with a simple band and picking out the diamond and setting together? A co-worker was proposed to with a simple Tiffany silver band so the proposal was a total surprise and she got the e-ring that she wanted. And she got a Tiffany band that has its own special meaning too.
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

Thanks everyone for keeping this going!

As for her "German-ess", she's lived in LA now for 3 years, long enough to be excited about bling. I don't mind obliging her if that's her fancy. We'll likely be US-tied for the next decade (hopefully not LA though...)

Other new intel, is she dosen't like rings that "stick out"- ex solitare's that pop out are a no-no from the comments I've heard. How do you recess a diamond into the ring enough, if it's 2ct? All the more for me to figure out the ring after!

Still fishing on the Marquise or not, stay tuned!

KamanCali
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

Here are some examples of non-sticking-out settings:

http://www.jamesallen.com/engagement-rings/settings-with-matching-bands/Platinum-Pave-Set-Diamond-Wedding-Set.html

http://www.jamesallen.com/designer-jewelry/meno-collection-by-danhov/ring/item_294-3773.asp

Actually when I was on the Danhov page I saw two striking marquise designs.

The first I really like but I don't know if it would be low enough for her and its not going to fit flush with a wedding band:
http://www.jamesallen.com/designer-jewelry/meno-collection-by-danhov/ring/item_294-7634.asp

The second is a marquise E-W which looks lower:
http://www.jamesallen.com/designer-jewelry/meno-collection-by-danhov/Platinum-ME3-by-Danhov-Ring.html

Its hard to set the diamond too low if you're going for a halo. Some half=bezel solitaire settings can be set very low.

At this point, you may want to eliminate some options to make the process more manageable. Halo or no halo, colored stone or white diamond, marquise or other, etc..
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

Sorry to pee in your Cheerios, but this is way too important and expensive to be a surprise.
Everyone is different; I absolutely hate marquise cut stones; it couldn't go back fast enough. And heart shaped anything makes me gag. And yellow? Not in a million years.
Not only do you want the ring to be something she loves, it needs to be comfortable. I have some rings I love, but would never wear on a daily basis because they are not that comfortable.
Get over the Cinderella crap; you're talking about way, way too much money.
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

if she likes yellow diamonds something in the style of tiffany & co's yellow diamonds collection - they have some very beautiful halo rings in that collection. This one i think is particularly beautiful: http://www.tiffany.com/Shopping/Item.aspx?fromGrid=1&sku=26598923&mcat=148210&cid=649502&search_params=s+5-p+2-c+649502-r+-x+-n+6-ri+-ni+0-t+-k+

and im sure there's one or two like this on ps - someone will chime in with them im sure =)

good luck on the search, its really nice of you to surprise her!
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

I'd nix the 2 carat idea. Sounds like she prefers stones that are bezel set. Or semi bezel...

http://www.pearlmansjewelers.com/jewelry-designers/sholdt-jewelry/rings/08ZZ1/

or

http://www.pearlmansjewelers.com/jewelry-designers/sholdt-jewelry/rings/04ZZ1/7/

or

http://www.pearlmansjewelers.com/jewelry-designers/sholdt-jewelry/rings/01ZZ1/21/

or

http://www.pearlmansjewelers.com/jewelry-designers/durnell-jewelry/rings/62AA1/

But you would HAVE to make sure you understand her definition of not sticking up.

I suggest you ask her if she wants input. I think you'll find she does. A comment like that means she has a definite idea of what she likes and doesn't like. I would nix the surprise route.
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

Gypsy has given you a lot of options to look at... and I have to agree with those choices.
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

2 carats is very large for most European women. Has she hinted about anything she'd like over the years? Must it be a complete surprise?

None of the things by themselves sound too eccentric, but combined, plus the largeness of the ring (which would very much stand out in Germany) and expense makes me think that maybe you should speak with her first. Or propose and go ring shopping together later.
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

stargurl78|1311868069|2978947 said:
ETA: Back to the OP's original question, I really don't think a big E/W marquise is a good choice for a surprise e-ring. I don't even know if I would buy an oval or marquise in a temporary setting to propose with and pick out the setting later, unless you know for sure she likes those shapes of stones. What about proposing with a simple band and picking out the diamond and setting together? A co-worker was proposed to with a simple Tiffany silver band so the proposal was a total surprise and she got the e-ring that she wanted. And she got a Tiffany band that has its own special meaning too.
Click to expand...

Me too! My fiance bought a Tiffany silver twist ring, to symbolize our lives that would be twisted around each other together forever. I love it and definitely cherish it! Plus I really appreciate the fact that I have input on my diamond e-ring now!

I like marquises, but not E-W. This is definitely too experimental for my taste! Imho it would put a bit of a damper on the special moment of the proposal if I didn't like the ring at all...
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

Funny. I don't like marquise, but do like how they look EW set.

OK I'm on this forum, I love looking at gems and settings. I think the "funnist" (is that a word) thing as a woman I got to do was go to different stores with my future husband and look at stones and try out settings. Why should you get all the fun? Unless she made it known that she wants both the engagement and the ring to be a surprise, why not do it together? I mean I almost enjoyed shopping for the ring as much as I enjoyed wearing it.

And yes, a 2 carat stone is going to stick up higher than a smaller stone, which again makes me feel you are likely to bark up the wrong tree if you go this alone.

If I were to stereotype her based on being European background, I can imagine her preferring 18K yellow gold setting, perhaps some engraving or detail work with bezel stone or stones in it. Something artistic, not using large stones. My mind is blanking on names but there is a designer in particular I'm thinking of, but also think of European designers like Gurhan.
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

Oh, I was thinking Alex Sepkus, but there are other names in the "do you have a favorite gold designer" in the jewelry forum.

I'm thinking designer, high carat gold or platinum.
 
Re: 2c Marquise E-W Ring -too "eccentric" to surprise her wi

Thank again everyone.

Ok new info, friend got her to mention who's ring she likes best, (looks to be antique ring, cushion cut), so I'm going to officialy say now the E-W Marquise (with fancy yellow, haha jk) is now dead, and abandon this thread. In other words, all of you are right :). I'll start a new thread in a bit based on this revelation. Stay tuned!

Thanks,
Kaman Cali
 
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