How rude!

[Sparkalicious]

Date: 12/19/2008 12:09:28 PM
Author: kittybean
2) If the person is a friend or acquaintance, I find that a raised eyebrow or pointed look shuts them right up.

Love the raised eyebrow, kiittybean - Works like a charm!

gorri - This type of comment is something that you will likely have to endure more than you would like because you had the good taste to purchase a FABULOUS diamond. While people on PS are used to them and the way they sparkle and look amazing, the general public is not. Many people are simply ignorant about diamonds and when presented with a beauty like yours, can''t help but think it is fake because it looks so perfect to them and possibly so different from other diamonds (usually not clean) than they have ever seen.

Wear your ring with pride. Your friend may have been intending to be rude - if so, that''s her problem. She may also just have been ignorant and had the poor taste to inquire. Either way, nothing lost - you still have your ring and it still sparkles like crazy. Yay you!

 

[Bia]

I wouldn''t be offended either. You know your ring is real, and from looking at the pictures, IT IS STUNNING. Dont you just wish you could get something so beautiful at a fraction of the cost?? I do. I''m sure a lot of people do. But then again, diamonds mightn''t have the same significance. Be happy that you are so lucky to have been given such a gorgeous ring, its a token of how much your FI loves you...

Also, keep in mind, that most people are not as educated as your average PSer, in terms of diamond knowledge. So she may just not know the difference. I''ve seen a lot of diamonds that do not sparkle like some of those I''ve seen on on PS or on certain people. She might think yours must be fake because its so perfect looking.

 

[Lisa Loves Shiny]

Date: 12/19/2008 12:09:28 PM
Author: kittybean
I''ve gotten the rude ''Is it real?'' questions a number of times, and here''s what I do:

1) If the person is a stranger, I smile and tell them, ''Nope, it''s a CZ.'' I feel more comfortable that way--I''ll probably never see them again, and I''d rather not make myself a target.

2) If the person is a friend or acquaintance, I find that a raised eyebrow or pointed look shuts them right up.

Don''t worry about the hair salon. If she says anything else, ignore her or just roll your eyes (a little juvenile, maybe, but it gets the point across marvelously). Your ring is lovely, and she knows it!

Love the way you think!!!!

 

[gorri8]

UPDATE...


I am back from the salon... well SHE didn''t do my hair so I couldn''t show it off to her ( I decided to take some advice on here, to show off the sparkles) but the girl that was doing my hair loved my ring and just couldn''t stop looking at it. After she was done with my hair she told everyone at the salon to look at my ring, including our friend''s wife. She didn''t even say anything. I told them that it was a natalie K and they my FI did such a great good and that I am so blessed.

Now here''s the down fall of this whole thing, she will go back and probably tell our others friends and make something up. Most of our friends are his friends and they are still trying to get to know me. My FI hate when people talk like this and especially if it is about us. I love my ring very much and I love that I have someone so amazing, that loves me this much to get me such a thing. When I left the salon, I feel sorry for her... I feel sorry that people like her can not just be happy for others.

I sincerely Thank all my PS ladies for helping me feel a lot better. I do wish everyone here a happy Holiday

 

[beach]

Good job

Watch her run back and tell everyone you were bragging lol..... Just keep smiling

 

[VRBeauty]

Date: 12/19/2008 12:34:46 PM
Author: gorri8
UPDATE...

Now here's the down fall of this whole thing, she will go back and probably tell our others friends and make something up. Most of our friends are his friends and they are still trying to get to know me. My FI hate when people talk like this and especially if it is about us. I love my ring very much and I love that I have someone so amazing, that loves me this much to get me such a thing. When I left the salon, I feel sorry for her... I feel sorry that people like her can not just be happy for others.

I sincerely Thank all my PS ladies for helping me feel a lot better. I do wish everyone here a happy Holiday

Ehhh... you have good reason to believe she would do something like this?

It kinda sounds to me like this woman is just less than perfect, maybe insecure. I hear there's a lot of those things going around. But nothing you've written screams "malicious."

 

[Mediterranean]

Date: 12/19/2008 12:34:46 PM
Author: gorri8
UPDATE...



I am back from the salon... well SHE didn''t do my hair so I couldn''t show it off to her ( I decided to take some advice on here, to show off the sparkles) but the girl that was doing my hair loved my ring and just couldn''t stop looking at it. After she was done with my hair she told everyone at the salon to look at my ring, including our friend''s wife. She didn''t even say anything. I told them that it was a natalie K and they my FI did such a great good and that I am so blessed.


Now here''s the down fall of this whole thing, she will go back and probably tell our others friends and make something up. Most of our friends are his friends and they are still trying to get to know me. My FI hate when people talk like this and especially if it is about us. I love my ring very much and I love that I have someone so amazing, that loves me this much to get me such a thing. When I left the salon, I feel sorry for her... I feel sorry that people like her can not just be happy for others.


I sincerely Thank all my PS ladies for helping me feel a lot better. I do wish everyone here a happy Holiday

I''m glad you''re not letting this one person get ya down. You deserve every minute of happiness that your amazing guy, wonderful engagement, and beautiful ring are bringing you. Some people bring others down to make themselves happy. i guess it''s what they saw a lot of in their daily lives, so now they''re doing it too. And it IS really sad...

I had kind of the same thing happen to me. I got my feathers all ruffled and my fiance just LAUGHED and said "Yeah babe. That''s just a TERRIBLE

problem to have: your ring is so big that someone thought it was fake." And then he kissed me on the cheek and said "I hope with all my heart that is the worst problem you''ll EVER have..." Which, when you think about it, was actually a very sweet thing to say.

So, I''ll pass it on to you. I hope that this is the worst problem you''ll ever have

Enjoy your Holidays and your gorgeous ring, and your sweetie!!!!!

 

[gorri8]

Sorry to say she is that type of person, she make stuff up about people that are not true. BTW Mediterranean I love that quote. I will take that to heart, it''s beautiful!

 

[blissfulbride]

OMG I have posted like a million post on my jealous friends. Some of which I had to cut off because my happiness was driving them crazy. They aren''t real friends because if some loves you they are happy with you. and its ok to get a bit jealous but hold it in and be supportive.

It sucks, but sometimes you have to down play when great things happen. Just let that beautiful ring speak for its self. When I first got engaged and all my friends were mean and jealous my mom told me when ever I felt a negative vibe from the person looking at it. To say a little pray ( like lord bless my ring) I use to do it all the time and it made me feel better.

good luck and dont let anyone ruin this wonderful moment. remember in the end its just you and your husband ~

 

[Judah Gutwein]

Gorri8,

This is clearly a jealous "friend".
Just based on your decription alone, it is obvious that you have a gorgeous diamond ring. Believe me, if your ring looked like frozen spit, your friend wouldn''t have questioned its authenticity. In fact, this "friend" probably would have been only too happy to point out to everyone that this was your (poor, unfortunate, etc.,..) diamond ring....

The fact that it is beautiful, brilliant...and not HER OWN, seems to be too much for her to handle.
Shame on her.

Even if her question was sincerely motivated, she probably should not have asked it and certainly not in public.
No class and tactless.

You know what you have and who you really are. Don''t let somebody else define you and their expectations of you, by placing you into their own self constructed bias ("is this ring real"...a.k.a. I cannot imagine that you own a real ring like this..").


YOUR RING IS GORGEOUS, ENJOY IT!

...oh...and personally, I''d look for every chance possible to showcase it in front of this friend

Best,

 

[LD]

A true friend wouldn''t act like this. Perhaps it''s time to re-evaluate the friendship.

 

[Cathers]

Date: 12/19/2008 1:09:44 PM
Author: Judah Gutwein
Gorri8,

This is clearly a jealous ''friend''.
Just based on your decription alone, it is obvious that you have a gorgeous diamond ring. Believe me, if your ring looked like frozen spit, your friend wouldn''t have questioned its authenticity. In fact, this ''friend'' probably would have been only too happy to point out to everyone that this was your (poor, unfortunate, etc.,..) diamond ring....

The fact that it is beautiful, brilliant...and not HER OWN, seems to be too much for her to handle.
Shame on her.

Even if her question was sincerely motivated, she probably should not have asked it and certainly not in public.
No class and tactless.

You know what you have and who you really are. Don''t let somebody else define you and their expectations of you, by placing you into their own self constructed bias (''is this ring real''...a.k.a. I cannot imagine that you own a real ring like this..'').


YOUR RING IS GORGEOUS, ENJOY IT!

...oh...and personally, I''d look for every chance possible to showcase it in front of this friend

Best,

I was thinking: man, I''d be fixing my hair, checking the time, and pointing with my left hand(if you wear it on your left) at every given opportunity in front of this person! LOL!!!

 

[trillionaire]

Ok, my snarky reply:
Her: Is it real?
You: Yes, of course! Isn''t yours?

My real reply: Yes, she was rude, but it doesn''t matter. Honestly, it wouldn''t make one ounce of difference if your ring was diamond or mossianite or CZ or anything else. And yes, they are all ''real''.

Your ring is a symbol of something greater between you and your FI, the material isn''t important. If someone asks you something like that again, just smile with a far off look in your eyes and say, "Yes, our love is very real"

That should do the trick.

 

[Cathers]

Date: 12/19/2008 2:53:45 PM
Author: trillionaire
Ok, my snarky reply:
Her: Is it real?
You: Yes, of course! Isn''t yours?

My real reply: Yes, she was rude, but it doesn''t matter. Honestly, it wouldn''t make one ounce of difference if your ring was diamond or mossianite or CZ or anything else. And yes, they are all ''real''.

Your ring is a symbol of something greater between you and your FI, the material isn''t important. If someone asks you something like that again, just smile with a far off look in your eyes and say, ''Yes, our love is very real''

That should do the trick.

I read somewhere, that when someone asks you something that makes you feel uncomfortable about the potential answer, you should respond with: How/why does it matter to you?
I have yet to use that response, but I am like you, I think something, and wouldn''t say it! I just shake my head and think *some people* and muttermutter!

 

[gorri8]

Satisfying my needs and indulging in one of my favorite ultimate craving... a warm cup of Hot Coco... sheesh, I feel 95% better! Thanks everyone... I know we are only humans and sometimes we get jealous here and there, and after reading everyone''s post I feel very lucky to have people I''ve never meant stand by my side. I wish my other friends would do that but I am very grateful. The funny thing is, she is the only one that has not requested me to be her friend on facebook. My FI said I shouldnt feel bad about anything, and she has no right to be like that with me, because I have not done anything to her but be kind. I will be making xmas cookies for our friends and she is on the list, and I do hope she will enjoy my yummy cookies.

 

[coatimundi_org]

gorri--just wanted to tell you that I LOVE your ring! Looked it up--and it is a sparkle-bomb!

 

[AprilBaby]

YOU know it is real and that''s all that should matter! Pretty petty on her part...

 

[Anastasia]

I''m not sure how I missed your ring before, but it is GORGEOUS!!

Please don''t let her poor behavior make you feel bad. It is just unbelievable to me how tactless some people are. I wouldn''t worry about what she is saying to the "friends" either. You have done nothing wrong, but she is lacking in basic manners. Usually, people recognize people like her for what they are, and take what she says accordingly.

 

[kindred]

I wanted to chime in and say that your ring is absolutely stunning!

 

[trillionaire]

Date: 12/19/2008 2:58:13 PM
Author: Çã†hër§ 

Date: 12/19/2008 2:53:45 PM

Author: trillionaire

Ok, my snarky reply:

Her: Is it real?

You: Yes, of course! Isn''t yours?

My real reply: Yes, she was rude, but it doesn''t matter. Honestly, it wouldn''t make one ounce of difference if your ring was diamond or mossianite or CZ or anything else. And yes, they are all ''real''.

Your ring is a symbol of something greater between you and your FI, the material isn''t important. If someone asks you something like that again, just smile with a far off look in your eyes and say, ''Yes, our love is very real''

That should do the trick.

I read somewhere, that when someone asks you something that makes you feel uncomfortable about the potential answer, you should respond with: How/why does it matter to you?

I have yet to use that response, but I am like you, I think something, and wouldn''t say it! I just shake my head and think *some people* and muttermutter!

Maybe go with, "why do you ask?" It sounds more polite, but still puts the attention back on the asker. Though you haven''t weaseled out of the question yet...

 

[gorri8]

Thats a good one

 

[Cathers]

Date: 12/19/2008 4:30:08 PM
Author: trillionaire

Date: 12/19/2008 2:58:13 PM
Author: Çã†hër§ 

Date: 12/19/2008 2:53:45 PM

Author: trillionaire

Ok, my snarky reply:

Her: Is it real?

You: Yes, of course! Isn''t yours?

My real reply: Yes, she was rude, but it doesn''t matter. Honestly, it wouldn''t make one ounce of difference if your ring was diamond or mossianite or CZ or anything else. And yes, they are all ''real''.

Your ring is a symbol of something greater between you and your FI, the material isn''t important. If someone asks you something like that again, just smile with a far off look in your eyes and say, ''Yes, our love is very real''

That should do the trick.

I read somewhere, that when someone asks you something that makes you feel uncomfortable about the potential answer, you should respond with: How/why does it matter to you?

I have yet to use that response, but I am like you, I think something, and wouldn''t say it! I just shake my head and think *some people* and muttermutter!

Maybe go with, ''why do you ask?'' It sounds more polite, but still puts the attention back on the asker. Though you haven''t weaseled out of the question yet...

THAT''S what it was!!! I am losing me mind! I knew it directed the attention back to them, but couldn''t remember the exact wording!!

thanks Trillionaire!

 

[Mediterranean]

OK, gorri8....I just saw your picture thread. All I have to say is, the more that lady talks, the dumber she looks, man. Really. She's making a donkey's hindquarters out of herself by slagging that ring. She should really just smile and congratulate you on your engagement. She's going to end up really embarrassed if she keeps up the farce...

 

[LaurenThePartier]

It does seem like you''re holding a grudge for longer than is necessary for a woman that really doesn''t matter in the grand scheme of things. I don''t know how you were showing your ring off in the salon, but if it came off as gloating or bragging, you may have to watch out for her.

I can think of a few reasons why someone would ask that question - it''s too clean, and she''s never seen a diamond so clean and sparkly, it''s bigger than she has seen, and asked the obvious question . . . in my eyes, the reason she would have been prompted to ask is really a compliment, although worded incredibly inappropriately.

Boy, I''d love for someone to ask me if my (insert body part here) was real.

 

[gorri8]

Update #2

She already told everyone ( all of our friends and their husbands) that I was "bragging" OMG... I just got a call from one of the my girlfriend.. all I said at the salon was My FI did a great job and one of the other hair stylist asked me questions on the band and I answered while everyone was listening. Sheesh.. the nerve of her. I am back to being upset. This really sucks. The worst part was she didn''t even say anything to me at the salon. She just looked and rolled her eyes.

 

[gorri8]

Now my question is....

Can something like a diamond ring bring out people''s true color?

 

[MMT]

I wouldn''t give her the satisfaction of bothering you. You have a gorgeous ring. Enjoy your ring and move on, you can''t let people like that bother you. Jealous people can be very mean. Be above it all.

 

[Cathers]

Date: 12/19/2008 5:25:54 PM
Author: gorri8
Now my question is....

Can something like a diamond ring bring out people''s true color?

I would say yes, a terrible shade of greenin her case!!

 

[Haven]

Date: 12/19/2008 5:23:48 PM
Author: gorri8
Update #2

She already told everyone ( all of our friends and their husbands) that I was 'bragging' OMG... I just got a call from one of the my girlfriend.. all I said at the salon was My FI did a great job and one of the other hair stylist asked me questions on the band and I answered while everyone was listening. Sheesh.. the nerve of her. I am back to being upset. This really sucks. The worst part was she didn't even say anything to me at the salon. She just looked and rolled her eyes.

gorri--Good for you for wearing your ring to the salon. This woman does sound jealous, and frankly, she sounds like a child. I'm glad that my friends are past the whole talking-about-each-other-behind-our-backs-and-then-calling-the-person-who-is-being-talked-about-up-to-tell-them-what-was-said thing. If I were you I'd tell the friend that relayed this info to you that you don't want to hear it next time she has "gossip", since it sounds like you are sensitive to this type of thing. It all seems very juvenile to me. I'm sorry you're caught in the middle of this.

That being said, I would definitely take it all as a compliment. I think that insecure women find strong, independent women threatening, and that threat brings out a nasty side in some people. My guess is that this is what's going on here. I learned a few months ago that several acquaintances of mine (who are all close to a good friend's husband) all believe that my entire wedding set is fake because it is "too sparkly to be real". Apparently, they had been talking about my set for quite a while, and they came to the conclusion that since my diamond and bands were so much blingier than all of their sets, they MUST be fake. My good friend heard one of their discussions, laughed about it, and then mentioned it when we were out for lunch. When she told me we had a good laugh together, and I suggested that she give them all jewelry cleaner for the holidays. End of story. I wasn't offended, I was pleased--they noticed my set for its beauty and drew their own conclusions about it based on their limited experience with diamonds. That's all.

In my experience, you can't win with people like this. Had you been given a smaller diamond, I bet she would have called it "cute" and said something nasty like "you can always upgrade".

I love Trillionaire's response I would totally say that next time.

 

[MichelleCarmen]

Ah, that sucks. She is jealous!