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I need some encouragment - big time.

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Ah hon, I am so sorry! Just know we are here for you!
 
I''m so sorry. I''ll send you all the positive thoughts I can! Big hugs sweetie!
 
I am so very sorry to hear this. You are in my thoughts.
 
Oh, sweetie. I''m so very sorry. Our hearts ache with you and we''re here whenever you want to talk.
 
Thinking of you, jo. I''m so sorry you''re going through this.

My parents are going through a divorce right now, after 30 years. Feel free to come on here and vent as needed. I''ll listen!
 
Oh, Jo! Honey, I am so sorry! I have "been there and done that," and I know it''s not easy. I just hate that you''re going through this!
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Please feel free to come here and talk to us whenever you want. My divorce happened five years ago, so it hasn''t been that long and I remember a lot about how I felt and what I went through. Please feel free to ask questions if you need to! I promise I don''t mind at all, and I''ll be glad to help however I can! ((((HUGS)))) to you, and again, I''m just so sorry.
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Sending lots of good thoughts your way, jo. I''m so sorry you''re going through such a difficult time.
 
((((((hugs))))))

I''m so sorry to hear about this. Be strong. Spring comes after the most harshest of winters.
 
I've been on the phone pretty much continuously since I first made this post a few hours ago, so I haven't checked it until now. Wow. I'm just so overwhelmed by all the responses. Thank you so much to all of you. You truely mean so much to me. PS means so much to me. I want to write more to you all individually, and I will when I have some more time and energy. Right now I'm just very drained. Emotionally and physically. We met at his attorney today, and basically ended up with him pressuring me to sign papers asap without even consulting my own attorney. I'm trying to not cave to all these guilt trips. But its hard. I'm meeting with someone hopefully later this week to give me some advisement. Big hugs and thank you to all of you!
 
I''m sorry, jo. Sending you some big time encouragement at this challenging time. I can''t imagine that anything will make it easier, per se. I do, however, hope that the collective best wishes of your PSers should assist with getting you through it. You are in my thoughts.
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I''m so sorry!

I do hope the two of you can sort this out with love and kindness. That having been stated, you must be clearheaded and absolutely resolute during this time. Do not cave in -- absolutely not! If you feel a twinge of hesitation or a tiny red flag flashes in your mind -- DO NOTHING. Say you''ll think about it. And call your main support group: mom, sisters (if you have any) and best friends. Also consult your OWN lawyer always always. I don''t even understand why you have to meet in his lawyer''s office!

In any case, I don''t know the circumstances... But please have support all around you. They will keep you strong, clear headed and resolute. Do not agree to anything that isn''t fair to you.

HUGS
 
Date: 1/13/2009 11:24:03 PM
Author: joflier
I''ve been on the phone pretty much continuously since I first made this post a few hours ago, so I haven''t checked it until now. Wow. I''m just so overwhelmed by all the responses. Thank you so much to all of you. You truely mean so much to me. PS means so much to me. I want to write more to you all indiviually, and I will when I have some more time and energy. Right now I''m just very drained. Emotionally and physically. We met at his attorney today, and basically ended up with him pressuring me to sign papers asap without even consulting my own attorney. I''m trying to not cave to all these guilt trips. But its hard. I''m meeting with someone hopefully later this week to give me some advisement. Big hugs and thank you to all of you!
Click to expand...
Jo, I know you already know this, but I just have to say it anyway: DON''T DO IT!!!!!!!
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You are entitled to get the opinion of your own attorney before signing anything, and you absolutely should do so. If C has nothing to hide, he won''t mind, right?????
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More ((((HUGS)))) and please know that we''re all thinking about you!
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I''m so sorry to hear that you''re going through this. Please, please don''t give in to guilt trips. You are entitled to have your attorney look at the papers - don''t sign without having someone take a look! Make sure to get your changes/conditions added to the papers, or draft your own.

((HUGS)) for the pain I''m sure you must be in, as ending a relationship is never easy - let alone a marriage.
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You are such a sweet and thoughtful person, from what little I know of you here on PS. You WILL get through this. You WILL come out the other side stronger for it. And you WILL find someone else in the future that will love and appreciate you for who you are, no matter what.

You''ll be in my thoughts.
 
Date: 1/13/2009 11:24:03 PM
Author: joflier
I''ve been on the phone pretty much continuously since I first made this post a few hours ago, so I haven''t checked it until now. Wow. I''m just so overwhelmed by all the responses. Thank you so much to all of you. You truely mean so much to me. PS means so much to me. I want to write more to you all individually, and I will when I have some more time and energy. Right now I''m just very drained. Emotionally and physically. We met at his attorney today, and basically ended up with him pressuring me to sign papers asap without even consulting my own attorney. I''m trying to not cave to all these guilt trips. But its hard. I''m meeting with someone hopefully later this week to give me some advisement. Big hugs and thank you to all of you!
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PS is invaluable for anyone in a time of need. Come to us if you need advice, support, or just somewhere to vent. Again, I am so sorry for everything you are going through. Stay strong and keep posting here. It really helps you heal!
 
Date: 1/13/2009 11:32:43 PM
Author: Irishgrrrl

Date: 1/13/2009 11:24:03 PM
Author: joflier
I''ve been on the phone pretty much continuously since I first made this post a few hours ago, so I haven''t checked it until now. Wow. I''m just so overwhelmed by all the responses. Thank you so much to all of you. You truely mean so much to me. PS means so much to me. I want to write more to you all indiviually, and I will when I have some more time and energy. Right now I''m just very drained. Emotionally and physically. We met at his attorney today, and basically ended up with him pressuring me to sign papers asap without even consulting my own attorney. I''m trying to not cave to all these guilt trips. But its hard. I''m meeting with someone hopefully later this week to give me some advisement. Big hugs and thank you to all of you!
Click to expand...
Jo, I know you already know this, but I just have to say it anyway: DON''T DO IT!!!!!!!
32.gif


You are entitled to get the opinion of your own attorney before signing anything, and you absolutely should do so. If C has nothing to hide, he won''t mind, right?????
27.gif
2.gif


More ((((HUGS)))) and please know that we''re all thinking about you!
15.gif
Click to expand...
Ditto. Don''t sign anything without consulting your own attorney. There is no RUSH. Take your time review all papers, etc... with full council. HUGS and please know we are here for you.....
 
I''m not going to even pretend to know what it''s like...I''m so sorry this happened.
 
I am so sorry to hear this. Take care of yourself and make you and your future a top priority.
 
Joflier, I''m so sorry you''re going through this ((((hugs)))). Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers!
 
Date: 1/13/2009 11:47:43 PM
Author: Kaleigh

Date: 1/13/2009 11:32:43 PM
Author: Irishgrrrl


Date: 1/13/2009 11:24:03 PM
Author: joflier
I''ve been on the phone pretty much continuously since I first made this post a few hours ago, so I haven''t checked it until now. Wow. I''m just so overwhelmed by all the responses. Thank you so much to all of you. You truely mean so much to me. PS means so much to me. I want to write more to you all indiviually, and I will when I have some more time and energy. Right now I''m just very drained. Emotionally and physically. We met at his attorney today, and basically ended up with him pressuring me to sign papers asap without even consulting my own attorney. I''m trying to not cave to all these guilt trips. But its hard. I''m meeting with someone hopefully later this week to give me some advisement. Big hugs and thank you to all of you!
Click to expand...
Jo, I know you already know this, but I just have to say it anyway: DON''T DO IT!!!!!!!
32.gif


You are entitled to get the opinion of your own attorney before signing anything, and you absolutely should do so. If C has nothing to hide, he won''t mind, right?????
27.gif
2.gif


More ((((HUGS)))) and please know that we''re all thinking about you!
15.gif
Click to expand...
Ditto. Don''t sign anything without consulting your own attorney. There is no RUSH. Take your time review all papers, etc... with full council. HUGS and please know we are here for you.....
Click to expand...
Absolutely correct. This is no time to rush and don''t let him rush or push you into anything. I''m sorry for this turn of events - we''re thinking of you!
 
Oh, honey, my heart is just breaking for you.

Please don''t give in to his guilt trips. You have the right to get your own lawyer, and to have them look over the papers. Things need to be fair for you.

Take your time and don''t feel like you have to respond to all of us right away. Nobody''s feelings will be hurt if you don''t address them personally. We''re here for you, okay? You''ve got PS behind you. We''ll do our best to help you through all of this.
 

Joflier,


I''m sorry to hear that you are going through this.

Please listen to all the ladies here. Don''t feel emotionally compelled to sign anything without professional consultation.

Please come here and vent. We may not be able to give you a hug in person, but we are sending you supportive vibes.

Sparkles
 
Joflier,
I just wanted to chime in and send you my best wishes as well. Please know that with an ''army'' of PS''ers behind you, there is no papers or agreements that need to be made under duress! You are not alone, you have an international cheer squad! Please stay strong, and remember that all paths lead to enlightenment!
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Sweetie, look after yourself, take as much time as YOU need and don''t be guilted/forced into anything.

IIRC your husband is the guy who set your wedding date, booked the pastor and had his relatives book plane tickets before he''d even proposed???

If so, now is the time to set your pace for this - not his. Emotionally these things leave you a complete wreck and you want to be thinking clearly and rationally when it comes to the lawyers and signing documents.

Take things one day at a time. Big hugs.
 

Joflier, I really am so sorry you''re going through this. I AM one of those whose "been there, done that". I KNOW how it hurts. If I can give any advice in general, it is this. Work hard on NOT blaming yourself. Easier said than done, don''t I know. I spent far too much time doing it myself, and it accomplished squat. Ultimately you WILL get to a place where you can chalk all this up to experience, although I know right now isn''t that time. Just be assured it WILL happen. You WILL integrate this and it will simply be part of who you are. Small comfort perhaps right now, but it will make you wiser, stronger, and more compassionate in the end. And DO NOT run out looking for someone to fill the empty place or reassure you that you''re still attractive. All of us are wounded and a bit crazy after a divorce. I got back together with my current DH at that time (we''ve had 3 iterations - he was my highschool/college sweetheart), right after the divorce. He had divorced HIS wife at the exact same time (insert weird music here) and was in even a worse emotional boat than I was. It was a disaster, and wounded ME even more deeply than my divorce. We eventually found one another again, but dang! I don''t look back on that year after the divorce with any affection. It was awful, and would have been better if we''d never re-met then. So take some time. A year at LEAST, to be YOU, ALONE. Get your head on straight - to really understand what motivated you the first time around. Understanding only comes from focusing within, and you can''t do that so easily if you rush to focus on another relationship. You''ll be much better for it!


Sending you a cyber-hug! You WILL survive this!!

 
Joflier, I am so sorry you are going through this.. my thoughts are with you during this difficult time
Having been through this a while ago, all I can say is stay positive and strong. You will be amazed at what you can accomplish. I think some of my best accomplishments came out during this time. Do not be pressured to sign anything or cave in.. take your time and sleep on All your decisions. Do not rush to get this over with. Make sure you are satisfied with everything.

You will see that all good things come to those that wait.. You are deserve the best in life.. Keep a positive Mantra in your head ( that is what I did ) All you need is positive reinforcement right now.. hugs oxoxo
 
Date: 1/13/2009 11:47:43 PM
Author: Kaleigh


Date: 1/13/2009 11:32:43 PM
Author: Irishgrrrl



Date: 1/13/2009 11:24:03 PM
Author: joflier
I've been on the phone pretty much continuously since I first made this post a few hours ago, so I haven't checked it until now. Wow. I'm just so overwhelmed by all the responses. Thank you so much to all of you. You truely mean so much to me. PS means so much to me. I want to write more to you all indiviually, and I will when I have some more time and energy. Right now I'm just very drained. Emotionally and physically. We met at his attorney today, and basically ended up with him pressuring me to sign papers asap without even consulting my own attorney. I'm trying to not cave to all these guilt trips. But its hard. I'm meeting with someone hopefully later this week to give me some advisement. Big hugs and thank you to all of you!
Click to expand...
Jo, I know you already know this, but I just have to say it anyway: DON'T DO IT!!!!!!!
32.gif


You are entitled to get the opinion of your own attorney before signing anything, and you absolutely should do so. If C has nothing to hide, he won't mind, right?????
27.gif
2.gif


More ((((HUGS)))) and please know that we're all thinking about you!
15.gif
Click to expand...
Ditto. Don't sign anything without consulting your own attorney. There is no RUSH. Take your time review all papers, etc... with full council. HUGS and please know we are here for you.....
Click to expand...
A BIG thritto. Be strong, though I'm sure it's hard. You have to look out for YOU now sweetie. Hang in there!

And I am also so sorry to hear this. {{{big hugs}}}
 
So, so sorry to hear this. Please, stay strong. We''re all here for you.
 
Jof, sending you a hug sweetheart
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Jo,

I am SO sorry you are going through this. I am sending you all of my thoughts. Although please, please stay strong. Do not sign anything because he is pressuring you. Chin up, wait to meet with your attorney before signing anything. Hang in there, we are all here for you.
 
I don''t pretend to know what divorce is like, but I do know the pain of a breakup - even if you don''t want to be with that person anymore. It''s okay to be sad and angry and cry and remember good times and disgusted at bad times. Go through all of it. And when you''re having a bad day, we will all listen. Maybe your friends are asleep at 2am, but we aren''t. Stay strong and watch for those little red flags. You only do this once and then it''s over. A new chapter *will* begin.
 
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