I want the old PS, and I want it NOW!!

[Circe]

Interesting topic, especially the comments from long-time members.

The comments about having PM's available caught my eye, and I think they can very much be a double-edged sword. There's no doubt that they can be nice for individual members, but they are not always good for the overall health of a forum. I've been a regular visitor/contributor to several non-PS forums that instituted PM's, and what happened almost immediately was that the truly interesting conversations started to take place off-board. Newcomers felt excluded, as if the "good stuff" was happening behind their backs, and that there wasn't much point in them hanging around. PM's make it very easy for cliques to form, so if what we are talking about is the vibrancy of different Pricescope forums, the availability of a PM feature might not do much to add to that. Some of the forums ended up deleting the PM feature, but it took a while for traffic to pick up. The bottom line, for me, is who exactly does the PM feature benefit?

Aoife, under other circumstances I would totally agree with you. But here's the thing: with the opportunities afforded by other social media, that's happening anyway. There are several FaceBook groups. Obviously, people *want* the opportunity for personal connection. PMs might mean that newbies could join in and up: as it stands, the interesting conversations may or may not be happening offsite, but they're not happening here. From the perspective of PS, wouldn't it make more sense to keep things centralized?

From the perspective of the members, well, that's another story ... leaving each of us to fight for herself if she wants to make connections, or, conversely, bring other people in on the conversation. At the end of the day, isn't that the point of the forum - the opportunity?

 

[Hera]

Speaking about building on each others comments, I just have to say something. I find that when there is a conversation that erupts into silliness between three or four people to be a thread killer. It's true that the thread may go on for a few pages very quickly, but I honestly think that it kills the thread because no substance happens after the fact.

You're right, and I'm guilty of instigating this exact thing tonight.
Had the OP not chosen to join in on the silliness, I wouldn't have continued. But once the OP joined in, I went with it.

I think it's okay every once in a while, but it's been happening a lot and I think a lot of people are left feeling

 

[Maisie]

Speaking about building on each others comments, I just have to say something. I find that when there is a conversation that erupts into silliness between three or four people to be a thread killer. It's true that the thread may go on for a few pages very quickly, but I honestly think that it kills the thread because no substance happens after the fact.

You're right, and I'm guilty of instigating this exact thing tonight.
Had the OP not chosen to join in on the silliness, I wouldn't have continued. But once the OP joined in, I went with it.

I have had the best time tonight that I have had in a long time on PS. I am glad that thread went the way it did.

 

[Haven]

Me, too, Maisie.

Hera--I completely understand what you're saying, and I agree. I had a lot of fun tonight, but there have also been a lot of times lately when I've clicked on a thread and been unable to follow what was going on since I wasn't a part of the silly crowd. Maybe the heightened silliness is the result of a general malaise on PS--we're lightening up the atmosphere because we feel bogged down in general.

 

[Tuckins1]

What exactly is everybody agreeing to? I see many agreeing posts (yet again) but no substance apart from (yet again) the usual contributors.

And for Uppy: What exactly do you want to happen?

Didn't feel the need to explain myself further. "Agreed" was enough.

I posted that a good while ago. But thanks for getting back to me.

Sorry, been busy. Life, ya' know? Too much to do, not enough hours in a day.

 

[Regular Guy]

" I find that when there is a conversation that erupts into silliness between three or four people to be a thread killer"

I'd like some pie, please...

Sorry, that had been the rage! I'm sorry to have become a very sporadic poster of late, but I'm never far.

It is an interesting set of posts recently.

I was prompted by Perry's post her to want to second his mention...

Years ago there was a Price-Scope pin... (it wasn't for hitting 10,000 if my memory is correct; but something like that could be done).

I remembered that, too, and liked that. I'll bet it could be re-instituted for modest expense.

Not that we need to get anything. For the time I put on here, I am happy to give back, in the little opportunity I have with having ordered the Rocky Talky book (though 24 pages for a year...but whatever). Of course, neither Pricescope nor we profit here, but rather, those in Africa who are in need. But....that I am giving something is nice. And, I'm getting, too.

Ira Z.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

"
I was prompted by Perry's post her to want to second his mention...

Years ago there was a Price-Scope pin... (it wasn't for hitting 10,000 if my memory is correct; but something like that could be done).

I remembered that, too, and liked that. I'll bet it could be re-instituted for modest expense.

Ira Z.

They were called "diamonds on the web" and looked like the old logo (spiderweb with a small diamond)

 

[Aoife]

Aoife, under other circumstances I would totally agree with you. But here's the thing: with the opportunities afforded by other social media, that's happening anyway. There are several FaceBook groups. Obviously, people *want* the opportunity for personal connection. PMs might mean that newbies could join in and up: as it stands, the interesting conversations may or may not be happening offsite, but they're not happening here. From the perspective of PS, wouldn't it make more sense to keep things centralized?

From the perspective of the members, well, that's another story ... leaving each of us to fight for herself if she wants to make connections, or, conversely, bring other people in on the conversation. At the end of the day, isn't that the point of the forum - the opportunity?[/quote]

I don't know, is it? Having read most of the posts about this over the last few days, I really don't get a feeling that there is consensus on the point of the forum. Some people seem to be looking for lifelong friends and soulmates, and others seem to be looking for someplace to hang out casually. Both are perfectly legitimate, but meeting both those needs could be a challenge. It's an interesting question to think about. Having seen what has happened on other forums I can't help wondering how much the FB Pricescope groups have contributed to the perceived inertia on PS forums. People only have so much energy, and no matter how permissive PS moderators are, or how many PM's are allowed, a forum like this can't have the intimacy that a, pardon the phrase, cherry-picked group on Facebook can have. I think it's worth talking about, because no matter what rules you use to configure a forum, it's not going to appeal to everyone.

 

[sillyberry]

As for posting in BWW and LIW once we've moved through those phases in our lives, I can say that I do go back in there from time to time. However, I'm under the impression that the current BIWs and LIWs find it irritating when people who have been-there-done-that come back and post. It's the same impression that I get in the Family & Home threads when non-parents post on matters that have anything to do with children--people don't want to hear it. Such situations don't turn snarky, but more dismissive, at least in my experience.

Actually, as a recent newlywed, I appreciated when former brides chimed in on BWW with advice. Sometimes it's nice to have other brides to hem and haw with, but other times, it's great to get the viewpoint from someone who's been there, done that. Maybe that's just me. I hope the current BIWs don't mind me coming back from time to time to offer my two cents. As for the FHH threads, I try not to respond to posts asking parenting questions. The only advice I can give is how I was parented. But I hear you, Haven. Sometimes I have to stop and think, "is my opinion really needed here?"

I agree with TG. I MISS having people who have gone through it on LIW and BWW. Obviously it is important to remember how you felt at the time when you wonder why we can be so stupid (IT IS MY DAAAAYYYYY!!!!), but that goes with everything in life.

I miss everyone, particularly in BWW. There are a lot of people with great style and insight who have moved on.

 

[Cehrabehra]

I joined here when I needed help looking for a diamond. I was so amazed that there were people who actually spent their time to help me when they did not even know me. And because of that help I have a beautiful ring that I will cherish forever.

I consider PS my big fat extended family. Like the father said in the movie My Big Fat Greek Wedding, some of us are apples and other oranges, but in the end we are all fruit.

Some are younger, some are older, some are naive, some are wordly, we all have something to contribute and I feel we all can learn something not only from one another, but about one another. I love all you guys!

+1 (haha couldn't resist... since I don't have to worry about post counts or anything )

 

[ksinger]

Aoife, under other circumstances I would totally agree with you. But here's the thing: with the opportunities afforded by other social media, that's happening anyway. There are several FaceBook groups. Obviously, people *want* the opportunity for personal connection. PMs might mean that newbies could join in and up: as it stands, the interesting conversations may or may not be happening offsite, but they're not happening here. From the perspective of PS, wouldn't it make more sense to keep things centralized?

From the perspective of the members, well, that's another story ... leaving each of us to fight for herself if she wants to make connections, or, conversely, bring other people in on the conversation. At the end of the day, isn't that the point of the forum - the opportunity?[/quote]

I don't know, is it? Having read most of the posts about this over the last few days, I really don't get a feeling that there is consensus on the point of the forum. Some people seem to be looking for lifelong friends and soulmates, and others seem to be looking for someplace to hang out casually. Both are perfectly legitimate, but meeting both those needs could be a challenge. It's an interesting question to think about. Having seen what has happened on other forums I can't help wondering how much the FB Pricescope groups have contributed to the perceived inertia on PS forums. People only have so much energy, and no matter how permissive PS moderators are, or how many PM's are allowed, a forum like this can't have the intimacy that a, pardon the phrase, cherry-picked group on Facebook can have. I think it's worth talking about, because no matter what rules you use to configure a forum, it's not going to appeal to everyone.

OK...I can only speak for myself, but I'm really not sure what those NOT on FB, think goes on on FB. I can say that for myself, I have not seen the group cohesion that many seem to be alluding to. I have known for some time that there was supposed to BE some FB "group", but never saw it nor sought it out. As time has gone by I've been friended by more PS members, but until just this WEEK, I don't recall any discussions of PS situations or members, and that was comparatively brief. Maybe these do happen, but if so I'm out of that loop. I can only assume that this is the case with more than myself. So...even on FB, most of us have better things to do than gossip about people here, you know? The PS membership among my FB friends is low compared to family, old friends from college and highschool, and other friends met over the years online. And as anyone on FB will tell you, you are NOT totally free to post anything you like with impunity, given the fact that you DO have family and long-time friends there. You'd be surprised how much most people censor there.

Just thought I'd say that, since there seem to be some weird ideas going around, like there is some vast extra-PS conspiracy of minds plotting over on FB. Maybe so, but I've certainly not seen it...

 

[Aoife]

[

OK...I can only speak for myself, but I'm really not sure what those NOT on FB, think goes on on FB. I can say that for myself, I have not seen the group cohesion that many seem to be alluding to. I have known for some time that there was supposed to BE some FB "group", but never saw it nor sought it out. As time has gone by I've been friended by more PS members, but until just this WEEK, I don't recall any discussions of PS situations or members, and that was comparatively brief. Maybe these do happen, but if so I'm out of that loop. I can only assume that this is the case with more than myself. So...even on FB, most of us have better things to do than gossip about people here, you know? The PS membership among my FB friends is low compared to family, old friends from college and highschool, and other friends met over the years online. And as anyone on FB will tell you, you are NOT totally free to post anything you like with impunity, given the fact that you DO have family and long-time friends there. You'd be surprised how much most people censor there.

Just thought I'd say that, since there seem to be some weird ideas going around, like there is some vast extra-PS conspiracy of minds plotting over on FB. Maybe so, but I've certainly not seen it...

Sounds like I need to clarify a little bit. My comments had nothing to do with any assumption of a PS Facebook conspiracy. The mind kind of boggles! I can't even imagine how that would work. Speaking only for myself, my comments about PS groups on FB had mostly to do with energy. Most people have only so much time in a day to spend online, and therefore have to decide where they are going to spend their time and emotional energy. If someone finds the contacts and conversations on FB more rewarding, s/he is likely to spend less time and energy elsewhere, such as on PS.

 

[TravelingGal]

[

OK...I can only speak for myself, but I'm really not sure what those NOT on FB, think goes on on FB. I can say that for myself, I have not seen the group cohesion that many seem to be alluding to. I have known for some time that there was supposed to BE some FB "group", but never saw it nor sought it out. As time has gone by I've been friended by more PS members, but until just this WEEK, I don't recall any discussions of PS situations or members, and that was comparatively brief. Maybe these do happen, but if so I'm out of that loop. I can only assume that this is the case with more than myself. So...even on FB, most of us have better things to do than gossip about people here, you know? The PS membership among my FB friends is low compared to family, old friends from college and highschool, and other friends met over the years online. And as anyone on FB will tell you, you are NOT totally free to post anything you like with impunity, given the fact that you DO have family and long-time friends there. You'd be surprised how much most people censor there.

Just thought I'd say that, since there seem to be some weird ideas going around, like there is some vast extra-PS conspiracy of minds plotting over on FB. Maybe so, but I've certainly not seen it...

Sounds like I need to clarify a little bit. My comments had nothing to do with any assumption of a PS Facebook conspiracy. The mind kind of boggles! I can't even imagine how that would work. Speaking only for myself, my comments about PS groups on FB had mostly to do with energy. Most people have only so much time in a day to spend online, and therefore have to decide where they are going to spend their time and emotional energy. If someone finds the contacts and conversations on FB more rewarding, s/he is likely to spend less time and energy elsewhere, such as on PS.

You know what I like about PS vs FB or real life? There are so many people on PS whom I would never have the patience to hang around with in real life (or FB for that matter). Yet I read and sometimes respond to their posts. Makes it often more spicy and interesting than my day to day interactions in real life. Plus I learn so much about other people who are pretty different from me view the world, and I learn it while getting to know them better every day as people. I find that interesting.

I also love that when I can't take it anymore, I can run away from PS (or not open threads) and that's OK too! That's why for the foreseeable future, I won't leave.

 

[purplesilk]

Hi everyone, I’m a newbie and I feel I have to express my thoughts.
I agree with all you when you say that:
• some new members start new threads because they are too lazy to do a proper research before posting and asking advice;
• some new members start new threads because they need attention desperately;
• some new members start new threads because they want to achieve the 10,000 posts’ goal and the following PS gift ;
• some new members are way too compliant;
• some new members can only reply :”Gorgeous” to everything ;
• some new members think/pretend to be diamond experts when they are obviously not;
BUT
• some new members are here to share their passionate love for diamonds;
• some new members did join this community because they hold some old PSers in high esteem;
• some new members just want to improve their diamond knowledge;
• PS is an open community, everybody can be a PS member if they respect PS rules;
• even old PSers were new members at one point.
IF
the old PSers don’t accept new members, PS is going to be an isolated and lonely virtual land and it is going to die.
IN CONCLUSION:
if you don’t want new members, you can either ignore them or mock/insult them.

Best to all of you,
Purplesilk

 

[hawaiianorangetree]

[

OK...I can only speak for myself, but I'm really not sure what those NOT on FB, think goes on on FB. I can say that for myself, I have not seen the group cohesion that many seem to be alluding to. I have known for some time that there was supposed to BE some FB "group", but never saw it nor sought it out. As time has gone by I've been friended by more PS members, but until just this WEEK, I don't recall any discussions of PS situations or members, and that was comparatively brief. Maybe these do happen, but if so I'm out of that loop. I can only assume that this is the case with more than myself. So...even on FB, most of us have better things to do than gossip about people here, you know? The PS membership among my FB friends is low compared to family, old friends from college and highschool, and other friends met over the years online. And as anyone on FB will tell you, you are NOT totally free to post anything you like with impunity, given the fact that you DO have family and long-time friends there. You'd be surprised how much most people censor there.

Just thought I'd say that, since there seem to be some weird ideas going around, like there is some vast extra-PS conspiracy of minds plotting over on FB. Maybe so, but I've certainly not seen it...

Sounds like I need to clarify a little bit. My comments had nothing to do with any assumption of a PS Facebook conspiracy. The mind kind of boggles! I can't even imagine how that would work. Speaking only for myself, my comments about PS groups on FB had mostly to do with energy. Most people have only so much time in a day to spend online, and therefore have to decide where they are going to spend their time and emotional energy. If someone finds the contacts and conversations on FB more rewarding, s/he is likely to spend less time and energy elsewhere, such as o
n PS.

Curious about FB/PS people I did a search a few days ago and came up with quite a few people (wasn't hard really since so many people seemed to have changed their last name to pricescope ) and I saw exactly what Aoife is speaking of. No wonder this place is
going down hill so fast when you see comments like "everyone is here" and "I'm so glad we have all found each other!!" it's all just
contributing to the demise of the forums because people ARE getting their fix elsewhere! I dont care if people find each other on FB,
each to their own, and i dont care that i am not a part of the purple circle and am largely ignored around here but what i don't understand is why people are calling for the old pricescope to return when they themselves are
(indirectly) contributing to it's demise when they are getting their PS fix on FB.


I just saw what purplesilk had to say and I couldn't agree more. New people aren't accepted by the old people and the gap between us is getting wider and wider. Old people reply to the old people and new people are ignored even when they have something valid to say. I just don't get it.

 

[TravelingGal]

purplesilk and HOT, you both make some good points. Allow me to make a couple, being an old timer myself.

I don't think it's that people ignore newbies on PURPOSE. And not that you aren't "accepted" by the long time PS folks.

It's that many of us have come in here and talked for YEARS. I don't read a ton of threads, and when I do, I tend to speed read, taking note of posters who I "know" and like to read. So it's natural that I respond to them. This doesn't mean that I intentionally ignore someone new, but it DOES have take a more standout post for me to actually respond.

This is also why I hate it when people change avatars...I had no idea Haven was Haven in nearly all of her posts tonight until I looked. Only because I thought what she said was interesting, I double checked the user name, and lo and behold, it was her.

Any time you're in a crowd, it's easier to gravitate toward people you know. But FWIW, I like newbies...especially new ones with interesting things to say. Every long timer was a newbie at first. We didn't all start PS when the gun went off all at once, ya know.

 

[purplesilk]

Curious about FB/PS people I did a search a few days ago and came up with quite a few people (wasn't hard really since so many people seemed to have changed their last name to pricescope ) and I saw exactly what Aoife is speaking of. No wonder this place is
going down hill so fast when you see comments like "everyone is here" and "I'm so glad we have all found each other!!" it's all just
contributing to the demise of the forums because people ARE getting their fix elsewhere! I dont care if people find each other on FB,
each to their own, and i dont care that i am not a part of the purple circle and am largely ignored around here but what i don't understand is why people are calling for the old pricescope to return when they themselves are
(indirectly) contributing to it's demise when they are getting their PS fix on FB.


I just saw what purplesilk had to say and I couldn't agree more. New people aren't accepted by the old people and the gap between us is getting wider and wider. Old people reply to the old people and new people are ignored even when they have something valid to say. I just don't get it.[/quote]

Hot - Ditto.


TravelingGal - Nobody can read tons of threads, we all have real lives and tons of real things to do,and it's obviously natural that you tend to respond to the old PSers,but this topic is the concrete proof of the old PSers rejecting the new PSers and the "ignore" tactic.

 

[hawaiianorangetree]

Tgal, I understand how/why it happens (I tend to skim the old posters as I have heard enough about the good ol' days and read more recent views) but I do believe that the FB friendships many of you have just accentuates the divide between the old and new posters.

 

[TravelingGal]

Curious about FB/PS people I did a search a few days ago and came up with quite a few people (wasn't hard really since so many people seemed to have changed their last name to pricescope ) and I saw exactly what Aoife is speaking of. No wonder this place is
going down hill so fast when you see comments like "everyone is here" and "I'm so glad we have all found each other!!" it's all just
contributing to the demise of the forums because people ARE getting their fix elsewhere! I dont care if people find each other on FB,
each to their own, and i dont care that i am not a part of the purple circle and am largely ignored around here but what i don't understand is why people are calling for the old pricescope to return when they themselves are
(indirectly) contributing to it's demise when they are getting their PS fix on FB.


I just saw what purplesilk had to say and I couldn't agree more. New people aren't accepted by the old people and the gap between us is getting wider and wider. Old people reply to the old people and new people are ignored even when they have something valid to say. I just don't get it.

Hot - Ditto.


TravelingGal - Nobody can read tons of threads, we all have real lives and tons of real things to do,and it's obviously natural that you tend to respond to the old PSers,but this topic is the concrete proof of the old PSers rejecting the new PSers and the "ignore" tactic.[/quote]

Maybe I've had one too many beers tonight, but how is this concrete proof of that? What exactly is "this?" The topic? I'm confused. But I have beer, so that's good.

 

[TravelingGal]

Tgal, I understand how/why it happens (I tend to skim the old posters as I have heard enough about the good ol' days and read more recent views) but I do believe that the FB friendships many of you have just accentuates the divide between the old and new posters.

I can agree that it does. But it exists and people want to talk offline. I pretty much talk to the toddler moms about the kids. Ours started because after our kids were a year old, we didn't want to post pics on a public forum, and PS had no way of protecting those pictures. There's still very little chat going on with the old moms...just pics and day in details about the kids. We update a big post once a month. At least the few that I'm friends with.

So I still prefer to do most of my big chatting here. But I know not everyone feels that way.

 

[decodelighted]

Bottom line, we can each only change *ourselves*. And I ain't changing. There's not much I'd do differently in the future. Is that direct & honest & present enough for folks?

And if I stop getting pleasure from being here ... without any expectation of recognition or gifts or other cherries on top ... I'll drift away as I see fit. What I *DO* plan to do is follow the forum rules to the best of my abilities & to remain thankful for the wonderful, varied souls that I meet along the way.

 

[Haven]

This is also why I hate it when people change avatars...I had no idea Haven was Haven in nearly all of her posts tonight until I looked. Only because I thought what she said was interesting, I double checked the user name, and lo and behold, it was her.

Ya know, I change my avatar for one night out of the nearly four years that I've been here, and I get called out on it. Sheesh.
Just kidding. I hate it when people change avatars, too. I'm definitely a visual person, and sometimes I don't realize that I "know" someone for weeks or even months after they've changed their avatar. It's very confusing for me.

In fact, I found myself reading my own posts tonight and thinking "Oh, I agree with that" because I didn't even recognize my own avatar. What does that say about me? (Well, at least I agreed with what I had written.)

 

[Gypsy]

I miss the old PS too. I don't understand why people fled when the formatting changed. I mean, really people? So I am led to believe it is slower because so many members have found each off PS. Back in the day this was the only place to catch up with our friends.

So, my suggestions for a Better, Revisionist PriceScope?

1) For the love of Mike, get the search engine running, and please lose the hyper-texting and the contrariness that makes newbies wonder if we're, a) competent, and b) shills.

2) Declare an amnesty. Maybe it'll bring some of the old joie de vivre back as old friends trickle back, or maybe they'll spit in our eye: but once that's done, start using time-outs like we talked about in the RT thread for vendors instead of banishing people for life. It's counter-productive, especially for a forum that's suffering pangs.

3) LOVE Haven's idea in Cehra's "Honesty" thread for little tokens of some sort for big-number posters, pins like the ones BGD is using in their giveaway or somesuch (I would have worn one of the old web sigils to pieces, and envied anybody who'd won one madly). Make people feel appreciated, y'know? And not just on a selective basis: it really is a recipe for disaster.

4) I know there's a fear PMs are a liability hazard - but, seriously? Be practical. Everybody is just finding one another on other social media, and, as a result, spending more time there, and losing y'all page-views and ad revenue in the process. Making PMs available and just popping a disclaimer into the initial agreement makes a lot more sense than forcing everybody into this behind-the-scenes stuff.

Just a few thoughts - will advance more as and when they occur (if I'm not flamed like a smart woman in 17th c. France, that is). Love y'all!

I agree with both Tacori and Circe and Mara (and others too, sorry if I didn't call you out).

Deb, what I meant abot contributing to LIW or BWW or... other boards was that in order to be a community, we have to act like one and lead by example (honesty tempered by respect) and understand that just because its been said before doesn't mean it shouldn't be repeated. I don't care what PS's standards are for 'significant contribution' or whatever the gifts are being handed out for. TO ME that means that PS is rewarding people that go above and beyond. What I am talking about is bare minimum. I think that many members have become A) entitled and B) Apathetic. They aren't meeting the bare standards o being part of a place where people care about one another and are courageous enough to be themselves. It's hard to be yourself.

Now to Circe's points:

1. Totally agree.
2. I agree and will personally apologize for dredging up the Italia thing (both on and off the boards) and will let it rest. I'm responsible for my only own conscience and I'm not the PS nanny.
3. I think an alternate acknowledgement would be lovely. It could be something as simple as a special AV given to members to use for a month. Like a crown or something silly, and fun and eye catching. Like a princess party for a 4 year old. Princess for a day. PS Queen or King for a month. Like Mardi Gras. This is a business after all, so it doesn't have to cost much to make someone feel special. Maybe we can all think outside the box of things with monetary value. After all the goal isn't financial incentive to post, it's recognition.
4. I was thinking about this a while back. I was robbed two years ago and I HONESTLY thought for a while that it was because of PS and GTGs and the exposure. While it ended up not being the motive of the junkie kids that robbed us, it very well could have been. And I think Andrey and the previous mods were very smart to resrict the posting of information. There are many lurkers and you never know. BUT I think the problem with PRIVATE messaging is the expectation of privacy. Private messages could be used to do all sorts of things and they are by definition PRIVATE and therefore not regulated. I think maybe there is a compromise that the moderators can work out that protects the members from exploitation, protects PS from liability and still allows people to connect if they want to. Maybe a 'secret' board that you have to ask permission to access, have to have a certain number of posts and where your post of private information is (email) is only up for 2 hours so something. Just brainstorming out loud.

Tacori, I think people have moved on as well. For example... Many of the brides I got married with are now pregnant and on FHH all the time. I love seeing them, but... I'm not in that place, so that connection is a fond memory, and not a current wire. Doesn't mean I don't care, don't enjoy hearing from them and vice versa... but change is inevitable. People grow closer and grow apart as well. As long as the environment supports change and accepts people as they change... I think it's healthy. I'm just not sure that the PS community has been doing that. Like I said, a lot of people (not you hon) have been taking without giving back. It's not about some 1K gift certificate that we should be posting, it's because we want to be here and care and want to give as much as we recieve.

 

[Gypsy]

Last thing to add:


As for argueing and thin skin. (I will admit I need to work on this too, because I haven't been doing it) we all need to remember that disagreeing is GOOD. It's healthy. We are not in Stepford. But that when we disagree we have to be respectful. And when we are disagreed WITH, we have to realize that the person is offering a different perspective and that they deserve respect too. We can all "just get along" we've been doing it for years. But getting along and becoming a cult where all the members think alike are very different. I get along with many people on here that I don't agree with. I still like them and still consider them my friends. That brings me to thin skin. Toughen up, and realize that this is a salad bowl and not a melting pot. We've got all kinds of people here and that means you need to moderate yourself and not assume everyone is out to get you, or that they are talking about you, or whatever. AND MOST IMPORTANTLY if they ARE talking about you, out to get you, or whatever... that you can just say, "please stop". You can stand up for yourself without whining, and you can defend yourself without being rude.

Off my soap box. For the night. Or longer. LOL.

 

[Cehrabehra]

Tgal, I understand how/why it happens (I tend to skim the old posters as I have heard enough about the good ol' days and read more recent views) but I do believe that the FB friendships many of you have just accentuates the divide between the old and new posters.

I don't agree with this - I mean I agree that you feel this way, I just don't think it's entirely true, objectively.

I don't have ANYONE from PS that I have met and been able to really cross over into a real life friendship with, but there are one or two that I feel like if we ever met that would be that and it wouldn't really be about PS anymore in our relationship. Having relationships off the board is a stage in the relationship, or sometimes it's a reconnecter or a stay-connected thing. It in no way inhibits new relationships, at least not for the majority of people. Of course if person A wants to form deeper off board bonds and person B shuns social networking they aren't going to connect logistically. If you are skimming old posters then you are just as guilty of shunning as the people you accuse of shunning.

Take me and you for example - I don't know you but I like you just fine. I am not sure if I qualify as an old timer, but I'm not in any sort of elite circle by any stretch. I'm just a 40 year old woman who came here 4+ years ago because I did a search on shane company and a post here said they were bad. I registered a couple days later and jumped in feet first and quickly asked a whole slew of really dumb questions (that people said - do searches!) and got a little knowledge and found out that there was this huge gap in information and I wanted that information and I wanted the powers that be to create that information NOW. I got fully involved but socially I was a mess - I had WAY too much emotion invested in having my ring made and alienated *sososo* many people (they can vouch for it) during the process. For some I may never recover their respect, for others they can chuckle back and wink now. But if all you do is skim over anything I write (remember, this is just an example) you may never see the exceptions out there. The exceptions far outweigh the rules. It is SO EASY to group people together, but in the truest reality we are each individuals all eager to be a part of this and we're actively creating it TOGETHER right now, right this moment. Back to you and me - me addressing you personally like this maybe it brings us closer, maybe it pushes you away further... but hopefully you can see that I, as an example, am not just a mindless body in a throng of whatever category I may fit into for you, but a real, quirky, fairly eccentric person who is spending the same minutes of my day with you, here.

I think the most divisive action a person can make is to declare that there are divisive actions at work. Just jump in - ignore the imaginary lines you think are there.... they disappear

 

[Porridge]

This is a away from the direction this thread has taken, but I miss the PS1 logo and colouring! I'm not mad about the blue, and I thought the old logo was so unique and cool. Here's a reminder:

 

[Maisie]

There was a FB group set up a while ago for PS'ers to get to know each other better. I did join that group but stopped posting there after a little while. I decided to add the people I felt drawn towards to my personal account. After that I changed to an account with just my PS name. I found it easier to keep my PS life separate from my real life.

There isn't this big group that people seem to think there is. All there are is PS'ers posting on each others ordinary pages. No big conspiricy. No huge pack of bloodthirsty people looking for an excuse to ignore/attack/taunt poor defenceless PS'ers.

I agree that I did stop posting here for a while. But that was nothing to do with FB. I had a lot going on in my personal life and I needed to give it my full attention. I have always found it a good escape to post on PS but this time I had to face the real world.

I love Pricescope. I have spent many hours having the greatest fun here. I would find it hard to give it up completely. Its unlike any other forum I have ever been a member of. I have met people I would never have had the opportunity to meet. I have forged friendships that will last a very long time. I am grateful to PS for that.

I hope that we can find some way to bring back the sense of fun at PS. Thats what is missing. No more worrying about what you say/how you say it. Be respectful but stop trying to make everything perfectly politically correct. We are real people with real viewpoints. Surely we can relax and say it how it is without people getting offended at the slightest thing. Not every comment is aimed directly at you! In the old days things would be hashed out and forgotten about. I think this was successfully shown in my disagreement in the random comments thread the other day. The problem was aired, discussed (slightly heatedly too) and then it was over. No blood was drawn and nobody was reported (I don't think!).

 

[ksinger]

[

OK...I can only speak for myself, but I'm really not sure what those NOT on FB, think goes on on FB. I can say that for myself, I have not seen the group cohesion that many seem to be alluding to. I have known for some time that there was supposed to BE some FB "group", but never saw it nor sought it out. As time has gone by I've been friended by more PS members, but until just this WEEK, I don't recall any discussions of PS situations or members, and that was comparatively brief. Maybe these do happen, but if so I'm out of that loop. I can only assume that this is the case with more than myself. So...even on FB, most of us have better things to do than gossip about people here, you know? The PS membership among my FB friends is low compared to family, old friends from college and highschool, and other friends met over the years online. And as anyone on FB will tell you, you are NOT totally free to post anything you like with impunity, given the fact that you DO have family and long-time friends there. You'd be surprised how much most people censor there.

Just thought I'd say that, since there seem to be some weird ideas going around, like there is some vast extra-PS conspiracy of minds plotting over on FB. Maybe so, but I've certainly not seen it...

Sounds like I need to clarify a little bit. My comments had nothing to do with any assumption of a PS Facebook conspiracy. The mind kind of boggles! I can't even imagine how that would work. Speaking only for myself, my comments about PS groups on FB had mostly to do with energy. Most people have only so much time in a day to spend online, and therefore have to decide where they are going to spend their time and emotional energy. If someone finds the contacts and conversations on FB more rewarding, s/he is likely to spend less time and energy elsewhere, such as on PS.

Well, in spite of my answering with your post, it really was more of a general response. There have been quite a few out-there comments tossed around the last few days, and yours just seemed a good representative post to use to respond to them. It was simply to point out that the gossiping some people assume is going on there, is likely either far less or non-existent, depending on the person.

 

[Liane]

Pink Tower - aw, thanks. (now why don't we have a blushing smiley? add that to my list of demands for the new and improved PS!)

I suppose I count as a pro, although it seems weird to claim that. But I do typically get paid pro rates (as defined by SFWA) for my blatherations in other contexts, so I guess that'll do.

(and sorry about the slightly off-topic post; didn't want to ignore the question and we don't have pms)

 

[PinkTower]

Pink Tower - aw, thanks. (now why don't we have a blushing smiley? add that to my list of demands for the new and improved PS!)

I suppose I count as a pro, although it seems weird to claim that. But I do typically get paid pro rates (as defined by SFWA) for my blatherations in other contexts, so I guess that'll do.

(and sorry about the slightly off-topic post; didn't want to ignore the question and we don't have pms)

Thanks for the reply. I just knew it!!! I am sensitive to this right now because I have a huge literature review due tomorrow for my MA.

Apologies for going off topic to all.