I'm coming clean...

[yssie]

Oh, this is tough!


I do wonder if you'd think of a new ring as a "downgrade"? And if you think that a "downgrade" could be mind-clean for you for potentially a very long time/forever? Materialistic as I know I am, I'm not sure that I could stomach that unless we really were in need of the cash - in which case I can't imagine that it wouldn't be a no-brainer, no discussion or agonizing needed..

 

[Deia]

I don't know how open you are to other alternatives but if this were me I would sell the diamond and use $1000 of it to buy an Asha or Moissy in a nice setting. It's sparkly, it's pretty and it's not a fortune. I'm don't want to start a discussion on this since it's not allowed... but there is an option for you if you're open to it. The rest of themoney (most of it basically) could be used for paying off debt, daycare etc.

 

[dani13]

Oh Dreamer, this is so hard, I feel for you hon!!!!

This is a very difficult decision....Please take your time to think about it. I would get that AVC and see how you feel about it before you make a choice. If receiving the $$ from the sale is going to make life significantly less stressful for you, then I would do it in a heartbeat. I hate having debt and/or owing people money- just can't do it- so I get you. If would make me sad to sell something I loved so much, but you can still have your AVC ring and it will be a stunner!!! The only potential bummer is that with diamond prices going up so much, if you ever want to purchase a stone like you had somewhere down the line, it will cost you so much more to do that. But then again, you can't worry about that- financial situations change and you never know what could happen.

I wish you the best of luck with this decision....And can't wait to hear what you decide!!!

 

[Amys Bling]

Have you thought about buying a .70-.90 ct RB and using your PS gift earrings for a three stone?? Save you the cost of buying sidestones and then you can pocket the sale money after getting the RB and temp setting- then find ways to save a little here or there for the three stone setting.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Oh, Dreamer, I can really relate to your dilemma! Since we have almost twin stones, I am interested to see what you do. You may recall that I have repeatedly considered trading my stone for a smaller one because of the real world vs. PS world issue. I was honestly working on doing it last winter but then prices went up so much that it wasn't financially wise to do a trade-in. I am sure I would do better now selling my stone outright rather than trading it in, if I could find a buyer, that is.

In my world, I do have friends who are wealthy and live in 5000 sq. ft. lake houses. They all wear their original small wedding sets. Back when most of us got married right after college, no one had the money to have these huge diamonds. Mine was 1 ct. and that was large for the time. I was happy with it for 30 years other than the cut and clarity. It is a pretty stone, though. I also have friends who have much less materially than we do, and I sometimes feel a little self-conscious having such a large diamond. I really think the 1.3 ct. range is a good compromise for me, although I have thought of trading for a 1 ct. H&A round AND a 1 ct. AVC!!! The problem with that is that I'd have to have two new settings, and that gets to be a grand waste of money buying new settings repeatedly. I'd want a Van Craeynest for the AVC! Our daughter who just got married last Dec. has a 1.15 ct. round, and I think it looks perfect on her hand. And that really is big enough for our real world.

My only concern with the options you have mentioned is that a 1 ct. AVC may face up a little smaller than a 1 ct. round, and that gives you a big size difference over your current diamond.

 

[lizzyann]

Dreamer, I wasn't able to read everyone's replies, so sorry if this idea was already presented. But I just saw your photo from GOG with all of the diamonds lined up. Why don't you sell your current stone, but that 1.19 round H&A, and then set it with your two earrings that you already own. Three stone without the add'l cost of buying the side stones? Win win!

 

[AmeliaG]

Hmmm, this is a tough one. This is probably the only time you'll have a chance to sell your diamond at a profit but if you sell it, you won't be able to count on getting another one like it.

The way I see it is that you'll looking at selling a very tangible long-lasting asset that will still look the same and wear the same 20-30 years from now. I wouldn't sell it for anything that isn't equally tangible and long-lasting.

I see that taking a huge chunk out of that debt will help you with expenses in the coming year but what about the years after? A year from now, will you be a bit relieved that the money helped the past year less stressful but will you still facing the same anxiety about expenses the next year with no equivalent diamond to sell or enjoy? With kids, unexpected expenses always crop up.

But if selling and getting out of debt can help you and your husband arrange your finances so you're a lot better off not only this year but in the next and next, that's very tangible, long-lasting and very meaningful. In that case, I'd sell but not if the only real advantage would be to get me out of some difficulties this year that I could overcome without selling the diamond.

It may be though that you and your husband are rethinking which assets you want the majority of your money in. If both of you are at a point where you're thinking you don't want to have so much money tied up in your diamond and would rather have it another asset, that's a valid point of view too. You know that from a purely investment point of view, diamonds don't make a lot of sense, so if managing your assets from a purely investment point of view, selling the diamond now is a good decision. Diamonds so rarely are a good investment decision, that's why most people don't think of them that way; it just that now you do have the ability to sell at a small profit which is very rare.

Oh, I don't know if this makes any sense, just some thoughts. The only recommendation I'd have is that if you sell the diamond, make sure you get something as equally tangible and meaningful - a better financial picture for you and your family that you can build on, alignment of your assets to reflect your values and allow you to manage them more in tune with the way you want to live your life. Because what you're selling is very tangible and reminds you of its value every day you wear it so I'd say the bar is very high for what you can get to replace it.

 

[yennyfire]

I think you should just do whatever you want.
You don't have to rationalize, explain or justify anything to anyone, even to yourself.
Just do what you want.

I think if Dreamer knew what she wanted, we wouldn't be replying to this post!

I have no good advice for you Dreamer, as I am typically all over the lot in what I want (since finding PS at least). While $5K is not pocket change (not even close, speaking as someone who also has 2 fairly young kids), I'm not sure that once that $$ is spent, you'll be happy with what you're left with and you know you couldn't replace your stone for the $11K you'd be getting....it's such a tough decision and I feel your pain!

 

[Miss Sparkly]

Posting a Pricescope link - google the info in the pages. It may be a feasible substitute until you are able to comfortably have the diamond you want. Having your cake and eating a bit of a dry one too...

[URL='https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/asha-diamonds.20430/']https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/asha-diamonds.20430/[/URL]

 

[Trekkie]

Tough one, eh?

If I were in your situation I would ask myself if the $5k would pay off the debt or just make it easier to deal with. If it would pay it off entirely then I would do it. If not, I would pay off the debt entirely and go without a ring for now.

Perhaps you could even start out small again and trade-in and upgrade to "grow" your diamond like you did this one?

 

[Dreamer_D]

Have you thought about buying a .70-.90 ct RB and using your PS gift earrings for a three stone?? Save you the cost of buying sidestones and then you can pocket the sale money after getting the RB and temp setting- then find ways to save a little here or there for the three stone setting.

Yes, it is an option we are seriously considering!

 

[Dreamer_D]

I don't know how open you are to other alternatives but if this were me I would sell the diamond and use $1000 of it to buy an Asha or Moissy in a nice setting. It's sparkly, it's pretty and it's not a fortune. I'm don't want to start a discussion on this since it's not allowed... but there is an option for you if you're open to it. The rest of themoney (most of it basically) could be used for paying off debt, daycare etc.

It has crossed my mind! The thing is, having a nice diamond for me is not only about appearances and sparkle. I suppose part of the appeal is its value as well.

 

[Dreamer_D]

Oh, Dreamer, I can really relate to your dilemma! Since we have almost twin stones, I am interested to see what you do. You may recall that I have repeatedly considered trading my stone for a smaller one because of the real world vs. PS world issue. I was honestly working on doing it last winter but then prices went up so much that it wasn't financially wise to do a trade-in. I am sure I would do better now selling my stone outright rather than trading it in, if I could find a buyer, that is.

In my world, I do have friends who are wealthy and live in 5000 sq. ft. lake houses. They all wear their original small wedding sets. Back when most of us got married right after college, no one had the money to have these huge diamonds. Mine was 1 ct. and that was large for the time. I was happy with it for 30 years other than the cut and clarity. It is a pretty stone, though. I also have friends who have much less materially than we do, and I sometimes feel a little self-conscious having such a large diamond. I really think the 1.3 ct. range is a good compromise for me, although I have thought of trading for a 1 ct. H&A round AND a 1 ct. AVC!!! The problem with that is that I'd have to have two new settings, and that gets to be a grand waste of money buying new settings repeatedly. I'd want a Van Craeynest for the AVC! Our daughter who just got married last Dec. has a 1.15 ct. round, and I think it looks perfect on her hand. And that really is big enough for our real world.

My only concern with the options you have mentioned is that a 1 ct. AVC may face up a little smaller than a 1 ct. round, and that gives you a big size difference over your current diamond.

Thanks DS. Actually, the AVC in question faces up bigger than a 1ct RB in photos. Actual measurements are similar. Still not sure its the right option, though, as I think like some other posters that selling may only be worthwhile if we put the vast majority of the proceeds to debt. If we put it all to debt, we would be debt free.

 

[Dreamer_D]

Dreamer, I wasn't able to read everyone's replies, so sorry if this idea was already presented. But I just saw your photo from GOG with all of the diamonds lined up. Why don't you sell your current stone, but that 1.19 round H&A, and then set it with your two earrings that you already own. Three stone without the add'l cost of buying the side stones? Win win!

It isa good thought but the 1.2ct RB in the photo costs $10k

 

[lyra]

I think it's totally possible to be perfectly happy with a downgrade. I'm very happy with my .76. I can even see it as a bit of a new trend. Going for something smaller but more mind clean might be a good compromise. As long as you pick the size/colour that you will be happy with, I don't think you'd be unhappy down the line. Once your kids are grown, maybe you'll upgrade again, maybe not. Priorities do change, change back, you never know. You may or may not want the AVC, but I think you could be happy with a smaller RB in the 3 stone you've always wanted. I think it's an itch you need to scratch. If doing that would still free up some cash, then great!

 

[ruby59]

I am probably older than many of you on here, so my perspective might be different.

I see you have kids. It is never too early to put money away for college. My husband and I are in that stage now with our second child, and we thank G-d that we saved early to lessen their burdens.


We also paid off our home early and taking that elephant off our back felt great.

And I do understand the analogy of real world vs Pricescope world. I love looking at the goodies here and what a little family you guys and gals are with your help and support of others. But the world out there is definitely "greyer," which is why I love to come here and ogle.

Only you know your true financial picture. If that is not your original stone and you have other priorities, sell it. All I have been hearing is "do not expect more than 30% or 40% on the second hand market." So if you can get 100% back, wow. Just do not rush into a another purchase imo. There is fun in the hunt. I am sure there is another diamond out there for you that will make you happy. And the financial security will make you even happier.

And what is this "push" present? I pushed out 3 kids, and all I got was a dropped uterus to show for it.

 

[karpouzi]

You are talking about selling high and then buying high. Yes, your diamond is worth (on the secondary market) a little bit more now than when you bought it, but the AVC you're looking to replace it with costs a heck of a lot more now than it did when you bought your diamond. So you are still losing money, IYKWIM.

If the value of the diamond is important to you like you say, then I think the downgrade would be a mistake, because the diamond you have now must be "worth" (in terms of replacement cost) considerably more than the vendor will give you for it.

 

[Cachette]

I wouldn`t sell it to get another, smaller stone. You saved for a long time to get this gorgeous stone and if you trade in for smaller you may regret it and then it`s too late. $5,000 is good money to have to pay down things or save or whatever but to me it wouldn`t be worth the trade for a (much) smaller stone. If you sold it outright and didn`t replace it then that amount would be somewhat worth it IMO - only if it`s for savings or investments (retirement, children`s education). If it`s for something like a home reno or a trip or any other material thing then it certainly isn`t worth it. You saved that money for your stone and it`s paid. Any way you look at it you`ll have only made 500$ more if you trade it in. I say keep the stone and just move forward from today.

But that`s just me.

Good luck with your decision Dreamer

Cachette

 

[Dreamer_D]

You are talking about selling high and then buying high. Yes, your diamond is worth (on the secondary market) a little bit more now than when you bought it, but the AVC you're looking to replace it with costs a heck of a lot more now than it did when you bought your diamond. So you are still losing money, IYKWIM.

If the value of the diamond is important to you like you say, then I think the downgrade would be a mistake, because the diamond you have now must be "worth" (in terms of replacement cost) considerably more than the vendor will give you for it.

'Tis all true. But in the end, this is luxury and all the *really* matters in out of pocket cost in concrete terms. All the rest is perception IMO.

My BIL and SIL went on a vacation this year that cost them $10k. Now that money is "lost"

 

[Dreamer_D]

Do you think your answer to this is colored by your own diamond desires? If you would love a 1.7ct but cannot afford it (I cannot either in this market) then perhaps you say KEEP? But if you have a larger diamond or did not get one until older or don't like marger diamond, you are more in the sell camp?

 

[Dreamer_D]

And what is this "push" present? I pushed out 3 kids, and all I got was a dropped uterus to show for it.

I bought myself a piece of jewelry for each of my two kids! Maybe you are owed And I got that other lovely present too

 

[Tacori E-ring]

I would either sell your current stone and use all of the money towards debt and future bills and replace it when you are more financially comfortable or keep it and tighten your budget.

 

[karpouzi]

Do you think your answer to this is colored by your own diamond desires? If you would love a 1.7ct but cannot afford it (I cannot either in this market) then perhaps you say KEEP? But if you have a larger diamond or did not get one until older or don't like marger diamond, you are more in the sell camp?

I don't like larger diamonds but I vote keep. It's more economics for me--selling highish and buying really high. Sell high, buy low makes more sense to me. If you were contemplating selling the diamond now and buying again when prices go down, my answer would be different.

 

[Amys Bling]

Do you think your answer to this is colored by your own diamond desires? If you would love a 1.7ct but cannot afford it (I cannot either in this market) then perhaps you say KEEP? But if you have a larger diamond or did not get one until older or don't like marger diamond, you are more in the sell camp?

Possibly- personal priorities may play here too! Those with kids and other financial responsibilites and those that are "free" withoney right now.

Honestly- I am on both sides- I don't have kids or any debt aside from college loans and mortgage and I own a stone close in size to you. I understand wanting to free up cash for financial reasons at this time and think that in your position the way I would do it is to get a .75ish RB J color and VS2 or SI1 in clarity- ideal cut and use the earrings as sdestones. You will get great coverage, a beautiful ring, and lessen the burden. You may look at younew ring at times and think of your 1.66 but you will also see that you helped your family out and still got have to a beautiful ring. Nothing to feel bad about there.

 

[tyty333]

Do you think your answer to this is colored by your own diamond desires? If you would love a 1.7ct but cannot afford it (I cannot either in this market) then perhaps you say KEEP? But if you have a larger diamond or did not get one until older or don't like marger diamond, you are more in the sell camp?

My answer (sell if it lightens the load) is colored by my situation. I have a 1.08 (small by PS standards) but in my area it tends
to be one of the larger stones. I dont wear it all the time because I'm not always comfortable with the size (shocking right).
However, we are fairly comfortable financially. If I had a stone that I wasnt always comfortable wearing due to its size
(not sure if you feel this way or not) and didnt really seem to fit our financial situation, then I would be even more uncomfortable
wearing it. In that situation I would be happier with a smaller stone and having some bills paid down and it would free me from
feeling uncomfortable/guilt about wearing my ring (this would be my feelings...but it doesnt have to be yours).

I'm just saying that this is how I came to my answer...your feelings may be totally different. Like I guess everyone is saying,
you have to do what you are comfortable with...you may be the only one that can figure that out.

 

[LGK]

Do you think your answer to this is colored by your own diamond desires? If you would love a 1.7ct but cannot afford it (I cannot either in this market) then perhaps you say KEEP? But if you have a larger diamond or did not get one until older or don't like marger diamond, you are more in the sell camp?

I don't like larger diamonds but I vote keep. It's more economics for me--selling highish and buying really high. Sell high, buy low makes more sense to me. If you were contemplating selling the diamond now and buying again when prices go down, my answer would be different.

Yeah. After thinking about it a little more, if you decide sell, I agree that *not* getting the AVC would be what I'd suggest- get something, er, else that's sparkly instead. Or wear a diamond band.

I mean, right now you have a diamond that is currently worth, when you sell, a bit more than you paid (wow!)- but, do we really think prices are going to drop drastically anytime soon? Or will they at very least hold steady? So- if you don't sell right now, if diamond prices do hold steady at the least, you're still going to be in a good position to sell it if you need to. And if the prices go higher, you might be kicking yourself later for selling now anyway.

 

[iheartscience]

Do you think your answer to this is colored by your own diamond desires? If you would love a 1.7ct but cannot afford it (I cannot either in this market) then perhaps you say KEEP? But if you have a larger diamond or did not get one until older or don't like marger diamond, you are more in the sell camp?

I don't like larger diamonds but I vote keep. It's more economics for me--selling highish and buying really high. Sell high, buy low makes more sense to me. If you were contemplating selling the diamond now and buying again when prices go down, my answer would be different.

Yeah. After thinking about it a little more, if you decide sell, I agree that *not* getting the AVC would be what I'd suggest- get something, er, else that's sparkly instead. Or wear a diamond band.

I mean, right now you have a diamond that is currently worth, when you sell, a bit more than you paid (wow!)- but, do we really think prices are going to drop drastically anytime soon? Or will they at very least hold steady? So- if you don't sell right now, if diamond prices do hold steady at the least, you're still going to be in a good position to sell it if you need to. And if the prices go higher, you might be kicking yourself later for selling now anyway.

Ditto this!

 

[Laila619]

Do you think your answer to this is colored by your own diamond desires? If you would love a 1.7ct but cannot afford it (I cannot either in this market) then perhaps you say KEEP? But if you have a larger diamond or did not get one until older or don't like larger diamond, you are more in the sell camp?

Possibly! I know that if I could sell my 1.8 without taking a loss, I would, so I am probably biased. It just seems like such a great opportunity though. Plus half the fun (at least for a lot of people) is the hunt for something new

 

[Amys Bling]

Do you think your answer to this is colored by your own diamond desires? If you would love a 1.7ct but cannot afford it (I cannot either in this market) then perhaps you say KEEP? But if you have a larger diamond or did not get one until older or don't like larger diamond, you are more in the sell camp?

Possibly! I know that if I could sell my 1.8 without taking a loss, I would, so I am probably biased. It just seems like such a great opportunity though. Plus half the fun (at least for a lot of people) is the hunt for something new

Very true!

 

[Amys Bling]

You could sell now and wear your birks push present for a while and buyin a few months if prices drop- or just buy even smaller in a RB - do the 3 stone and bank more than 5K