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Let’s Get Real - Topic about Big Ol’ Diamonds

Well I think that for now, I have reached my upgrade limit. I had a very cool jeweler who used to allow me to upgrade in small Increments. Started at a 1 carat princess, to .80 round, to 1.43 round to 2.20 to 2.5 to 2.9–each upgrade was for different goals. Now I have it all and he has changed his policy, lol. So no way in hell can I double up! Not to mention, for round, I’m very comfortable. Emerald—give me a 4 plus
carat, lol. But not gonna happen bc Idk if an emerald would make me as happy as my round and then I would have traded in my holy grail. So im considering a 2 carat emerald cut to scratch that itch. We will see. Do I blame PS? Nope. Even here there is a very diverse forum. I’m an outlier I think. I love antique jewelry. I love resetting. I’m not a perfectionist. I take risks when buying estate.
 
Comparison can be the thief of joy! Everyone doesn’t want a super large diamond and posters here are at various stages of their lives. If you are raising a family or building a career, money might not be as accessible to you now as it might be later. Tastes change and so do desires so what is now is not necessarily what will always be. Some people downsize too. Be proud of what you have and remember at the time, it was chosen for a reason. If not being here makes your life better, then take a break by all means. Feelings and attitudes change over time as well - don’t let someone else’s possessions make yours any less valuable to you! Sometimes it requires determining what is most important to you and working toward that goal by selling or saving. I think it is hard to stay disciplined in that regard; easier to pick up smaller items along the way to scratch the itch but it is usually not a forever fix. My motto is always ‘don’t let your possessions possess you’. That just insures misery - perspective is everything!!
 
Don't get me wrong - if I were to win big on the lottery, I would go and get a 2ct+ EC right away, after buying a piece of land to build my own house to my own design and specifications; and shared my good fortune with my friends and family etc. etc...

The chances of that is next to zero.

In the meantime, I shall be content with my lot.

I am unlikely to move again, and have already started to plan for the installation of a chair lift so that I can go upstairs to access the bedroom and more importantly the bathroom when I knees pack up!

DK :))
 
For now, I’m content with admiring 3, 4, 5+ carats on other PSers and living vicariously through them. I work in the public sector and I just would not feel comfortable wearing anything bigger than 8.5mm-ish to work (my biggest stone is just under that). I also wouldn’t want to spend so much money on a piece that I would only wear once in a while on the weekends if that.

For now, I’m good with my collection of various rings and bands. I enjoy rotating them, stacking them, mixing them up, coming up with different combinations, wearing them as RHRs, etc. I like the “look” of multiple rings on my hands, wearing them on index and middle fingers and have them sized for those fingers. With that said, I can definitely see myself selling most of my collection to get the ring to rule them all when I am closer to retirement (especially because I already have my original engagement ring stone set as a pendant). But I think even then, the biggest I would go would be 4-5ct. I don’t have sentimental attachments to any of my current rings (other than my wedding band) as I have purchased them all myself and they weren’t gifts. I also suspect that my style will change in the next couple of decades and I won’t like the same “look” at some point.

In your case, I was thinking the same thing as @nala and @seaurchin as I read through your post. Perhaps you would get more satisfaction and contentment from one big ring
 
I would love to have a well cut "bigger" diamond, I think a 2 ct would do it for me, however I would never ever be able to justify the cost and honestly I almost never jewelry anymore anymore so what is the point, do I still dream about it, you betcha I do love sparkly things...
 
There are so many different ways to answer this. It's not that your collection isn't appreciated, or beautiful or you don't love it. Never feel bad about what you have just because others have something you want [regardless of what it is]. It just means that your tastes have changed. But guilt, is a terrible word. And misused in everyday communications. Guilt is for people that mean to do intentional ill will or harm. Not to feel bad over wanting more.

That my darling is called ambition and drive. There is always something fun to strive for in this life. A new brass ring, so to speak.
 
I cleaned Sophia up real nice like and when I put her on she reminded me of just how happy she makes me. I just don’t know if I’d be okay selling her or having her sit in a jewelry box because I found a bigger diamond.
 
For me PS has been a blessing in that it has helped me enormously in figuring out what I want and what I don't. I remember when I was first looking at engagement rings, I thought my only options were B&M stores with the "standard" fare (round, oval, princess, emerald). I picked an RB because it was the most popular, and then discovered 8-main modern cushion which became almost an immediate upgrade. That relationship didn't last and as soon as I fell in love with my now husband I also fell in love with OECs and learned about the huge savings that come with purchasing online. Then it was a rabbit hole from there into the world of antique stones. Three upgrades later, I finally have the diamond of my dreams, and I do think your mindset changes tremendously when you own something you never thought you would. I think I will always be a "one ring to rule them all" as I have a number of RHRs but don't wear the regularly. PS also helped me normalize that it's ok to have a bigger stone, and to prioritize luxuries like diamonds over cars, handbags, watches, etc. Some people may think it's weird that I sport a 5+ carat diamond ring and drive a Hyundai, but I get way more joy out of the diamond ring I wear every day over the car I drive to get from place to place. Plus, my children can destroy my car, but they won't destroy my diamond!
 
sweetpea&babycorn said:
For me PS has been a blessing in that it has helped me enormously in figuring out what I want and what I don't. I remember when I was first looking at engagement rings, I thought my only options were B&M stores with the "standard" fare (round, oval, princess, emerald). I picked an RB because it was the most popular, and then discovered 8-main modern cushion which became almost an immediate upgrade. That relationship didn't last and as soon as I fell in love with my now husband I also fell in love with OECs and learned about the huge savings that come with purchasing online. Then it was a rabbit hole from there into the world of antique stones. Three upgrades later, I finally have the diamond of my dreams, and I do think your mindset changes tremendously when you own something you never thought you would. I think I will always be a "one ring to rule them all" as I have a number of RHRs but don't wear the regularly. PS also helped me normalize that it's ok to have a bigger stone, and to prioritize luxuries like diamonds over cars, handbags, watches, etc. Some people may think it's weird that I sport a 5+ carat diamond ring and drive a Hyundai, but I get way more joy out of the diamond ring I wear every day over the car I drive to get from place to place. Plus, my children can destroy my car, but they won't destroy my diamond!
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Love this!!!
 
Big old diamonds are a big ole conundrum...agree with so much of what has been said here. They are a totally, unnecessary luxury. That said, PS has helped so many get a BOD without spring bog ole bags of money.

I am fortunate in that I have a few, what are to me, biggies... I have a near 3 carat pear thats shallow so faces up HUGE, a 3 carat Asscher and a few clusters that clock in at 5 carats total. That said, I wear them - a lot. I wear them with jeans, to work, to the bar, taking a walk.

To me a BOD doesn’t feel like such a big old deal when you use them, wear them, get a few dings in the band. I bought and/or designed my rings to get used.
 
elizat said:
It does seem like a normal size for here is getting close to the 5 to 7 carat mark for stones, which isn't something in the budgetary cards for me. I made the decision to spend a lot less- or no time here for periods- because of the whole comparison is the thief of joy, where it made me not want what I had or feel it was garbage
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This makes me sad.

Go to Colored Stones! There are treasures on that sub-forum for every taste and budget. It's never about the who's got the biggest. One of the things that I love about it. You can show off your exquisite taste (and extensive expertise) with a pretty small pocketbook. You can make an affordable stone really sing in a carefully considered mounting with just the right side stones.
 
I would certainly wear a bigger diamond but bigger to me has a cap of 8.5mm. Chances of that are extremely slim though because my lifestyle doesn’t support sporting a larger diamond like that. It would be like wearing an evening gown to go to Target, it just wouldn’t work.

IF I found an antique ring around that size that I just had to have, it would be a “one to rule them all” and I would sell the rest of my rings to fund it. I just don’t see that happening because my largest diamond ring is around 1 1/4 and is the largest in the family already, I don’t want to be even more of a princess ;)
 
I’ll wear whatever giant diamond anybody gives me, just not often enough to bother spending my own money on one.

We’ll see what lab diamond prices do in a few years. Interesting question… how much money is it ok to spend on something I’ll wear like once a year? Because honestly diamonds are just cool to look at and if the price is right I can always stick a 20 carat rock in a glass box.
 
yes My mind has drifted into searching for perfect OEC or over 4 ct diamond but i always come to my senses. For my personal style I come to believe the setting is what packs the punch. There is so much versatility with smaller stones that really bring excellent finger cover and can pack a serious punch…Art Deco settings, halos, retro desing, classic/ contemporary designs, modern designs, etc. my challenge has been the search for perfect setting ”for me, my personal style” to display my stones…a costly journey it has been too LOL :lol: but I’m getting there
 
winnietucker said:
It did until I got a 3 ct diamond and then I realized it was just entirely too big and I felt super self conscious. Now I’m thinking 2.25ish cts for a MRB would be perfectly fine. Still big but not in a “hey, come rob me” kinda way.
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I had the exact same experience!
 
The ugly/honest truth about me getting my 3.63 ct OEC is a combo of being on PS, and jealousy of friends on real life. PS I blame for teaching me what an OEC even is, and how special they are. Add to the fact that I was also jealous of irl friends who were switching over to be stay-at-home Moms, which I wanted so much for myself. So in my effort to soothe myself along with the good luck of having found a beautiful low color stone pre-loved, I pulled the trigger.

I did surprise myself by being a bit embarrassed by the size...briefly, ha. That was 3 years ago and now I don't even think anything of the size. DDS is real. I had experienced the equivalent with vehicles before, and wanting something new every few years. But I do believe this OEC has fully scratched the itch and do not ever see selling or upgrading, even if just color. I'm now back to colored stones which have always been my first love. I can, however, just admire the amazing beauties posted here without feeling bad or jealous. 2019 was just the perfect storm for me.
 
Mrs_Strizzle said:
The ugly/honest truth about me getting my 3.63 ct OEC is a combo of being on PS, and jealousy of friends on real life. PS I blame for teaching me what an OEC even is, and how special they are. Add to the fact that I was also jealous of irl friends who were switching over to be stay-at-home Moms, which I wanted so much for myself. So in my effort to soothe myself along with the good luck of having found a beautiful low color stone pre-loved, I pulled the trigger.

I did surprise myself by being a bit embarrassed by the size...briefly, ha. That was 3 years ago and now I don't even think anything of the size. DDS is real. I had experienced the equivalent with vehicles before, and wanting something new every few years. But I do believe this OEC has fully scratched the itch and do not ever see selling or upgrading, even if just color. I'm now back to colored stones which have always been my first love. I can, however, just admire the amazing beauties posted here without feeling bad or jealous. 2019 was just the perfect storm for me.
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If you’re back to colors I hope you create that olive and pink combo ;)
 
RetroQT said:
Preface: This is not directed toward anyone. This is not about individuals. This is merely an open discussion about emotions and how what we see can impact our thinking.

While I look at all the posts on here of absolutely stunning jewelry, I find myself experiencing a lot of emotions. I see these gorgeous 3ct, 4ct, 5ct+ diamonds on the hands of our amazing ladies and I notice I start feeling like I want to find one of my own. I want to start searching for something I know I don’t need. (In fact I have a jewelry box full of “don’t needs” right now.) My mind then runs scenarios of how I would pay for a 4ct OEC, what color metal I’d want it in, and who would I go to for the setting. And while all that is fun and I love to look at jewelry, I realize I if I am not content with the beautiful pieces I have now, would I truly be content with the next one?

Anyway, I was just wondering if anyone else finds that their mind wonders like this too?
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Yes, in general I see beautiful rings on many forums. I do appreciate just seeing the joy and excitement others have shared in picking the ring of their dreams. Personally I love antique diamonds so much, and they are all so unique and special seeming… it’s enchanting!
 
Austina said:
As someone who didn’t even have an engagement ring, I do think it’s possible to end up satisfied when you finally have something you never thought you’d own.

Over the years, I’ve acquired a lot of jewellery, most of which I don’t wear now. Then I joined PS, and like you, starting seeing everyone‘s beautiful diamond rings, and wondering what it’d be like to own something like that, never actually thinking I would.

I met a PSer in person, who’d recently got a beautiful OEC from OWD. I’d never seen one in person and was immediately struck by how lovely it was, and understood why they were so prized.

I was coming up to a milestone birthday and major anniversary, and when DH asked what I’d like, I said an OEC. Never in my wildest dreams did I think I’d end up with Bella. I got used to her size very easily, and I no longer feel self conscious wearing her. I definitely don’t see myself ever wanting to ’upgrade’ or change the setting.

I do think part of the ‘problem’ in belonging to PS, is that it’s easy to get swept up in the thrill of the chase, but if it isn’t really what you want, but will soothe the itch for now, you’re still left with the longing after the itch has been temporarily soothed.
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Please reshape a picture of Bella:love:
 
RetroQT said:
Preface: This is not directed toward anyone. This is not about individuals. This is merely an open discussion about emotions and how what we see can impact our thinking.

While I look at all the posts on here of absolutely stunning jewelry, I find myself experiencing a lot of emotions. I see these gorgeous 3ct, 4ct, 5ct+ diamonds on the hands of our amazing ladies and I notice I start feeling like I want to find one of my own. I want to start searching for something I know I don’t need. (In fact I have a jewelry box full of “don’t needs” right now.) My mind then runs scenarios of how I would pay for a 4ct OEC, what color metal I’d want it in, and who would I go to for the setting. And while all that is fun and I love to look at jewelry, I realize I if I am not content with the beautiful pieces I have now, would I truly be content with the next one?

Anyway, I was just wondering if anyone else finds that their mind wonders like this too?
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Funny you post this because I've been thinking about this a lot lately. Sometimes i wonder if my itch for new jewelry will ever truly be scratched. My constant want really bothers me sometimes. My husband and I couldn't afford much when we were first married and my OG wedding ring was a white sapphire. I think thats what fueled my addiction. I secretly hated the white sapphire and dreamed of owning a diamond. Once I got the diamond, I dreamed of owning an old cut. Once I got the old cut, I dreamed of hitting the 2ct mark. Now I have my dream 2 ct old cut in a setting by my favorite designer and I'm getting an itch for a 3ct or even 4ct. I tried to scratch the itch with an almost 4ct lab diamond and its absolutely stunning but just isn't mind clean to me. I've also done so many projects in between. Buying and selling at a loss and combining money towards larger projects. I'm currently working on a gemstone project, planning for another gemstone project, and hoping to sell my lab diamond (unfortunately at a major loss). I'm constantly thinking about how to free the funds for more projects. I really hope that someday i will feel content but I've realized that I enjoy the chase. Its become a bit of a hobby- a very very expensive hobby.
 
RetroQT said:
Preface: This is not directed toward anyone. This is not about individuals. This is merely an open discussion about emotions and how what we see can impact our thinking.

While I look at all the posts on here of absolutely stunning jewelry, I find myself experiencing a lot of emotions. I see these gorgeous 3ct, 4ct, 5ct+ diamonds on the hands of our amazing ladies and I notice I start feeling like I want to find one of my own. I want to start searching for something I know I don’t need. (In fact I have a jewelry box full of “don’t needs” right now.) My mind then runs scenarios of how I would pay for a 4ct OEC, what color metal I’d want it in, and who would I go to for the setting. And while all that is fun and I love to look at jewelry, I realize I if I am not content with the beautiful pieces I have now, would I truly be content with the next one?

Anyway, I was just wondering if anyone else finds that their mind wonders like this too?
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Yes! I'm only in "little league" when it comes to diamonds, but I love looking at other people's lovelies. Being content is what I yearn for. As many times as I have changed my mind, I'm usually most happy with the simplest things. I seldom wear more than my wedding rings and earrings. That's just me. My life is very simple, but that doesn't mean I can't dream like Elizabeth Taylor!
 
Angie3 said:
Being content is what I yearn for. As many times as I have changed my mind, I'm usually most happy with the simplest things.
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Them's fightin' words here! :lol-2:
 
I don’t know if this has been mentioned, but some of us have larger hands and need a bigger stone. I work with a colleague who has tiny fingers (smaller than my pinky) and her stone looks huge on her, not so on me. Just saying… for me, it’s not about status as much as proportion. :)
 
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Slickk said:
I don’t know if this has been mentioned, but some of us girls have larger hands and need a bigger stone. I work with a colleague who has tiny fingers (smaller than my pinky) and her stone looks huge on her, not so on me. Just saying… for me, it’s not about status as much as proportion. :)
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I hear you @Slickk, I’ve got short fat fingers, and honestly, 2ct stones were just lost on my stumps! I knew I’d need at least a 9mm stone to give me the look I wanted. One of my friends has lovely dainty fingers and a half carat solitaire looks huge on her.
 
@Austina it’s so unfair! I told my husband, it’s all about proportion, and bummer for him, my fingers are larger than most. :lol:
 
:lol: Colin always tells people that when he met me I was the perfect woman, I had no interest in jewellery, I didn’t eat much and I didn’t drink - how times have changed! Even when I was tiny, my fingers were always big.
 
Austina said:
I didn’t eat much and I didn’t drink - how times have changed! Even when I was tiny, my fingers were always big.
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@Austina Same! No matter how much weight I lose, these fingers stay the same!
 
Maybe that’s my problem! When we got engaged, I weighed about 105 pounds and had a size 4.25 finger. Twelve years later (and being in my 50s), I’m about 30 pounds more with a size 6 finger! So my mind knows there is more of me now and I need a bigger rock so it is proportionate. LMAO!!!
 
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