Our new money!

[Imdanny]

Oh, I'm sorry. That was crass.

And I don't have any new money anyway.

Just joking, people.

(But have you ever met people like that? They're so full of themselves! )

 

[y2kitty]

Hahaha!

 

[Tuckins1]

Lol, yeah. Like the people that tell you how much they make and how much they paid for everything when you never asked?

 

[Imdanny]

Yeah, like the mid-level people on Wall Street who got used to getting $100,000 bonuses and can't help rubbing it in everyone's face while retiring at 40 and telling you how they think it's such a wonderful idea if everyone else's Social Security benefit get cut. Um, not that I'm thinking of any actual person.

 

[manderz]

Oh, you mean like my uncle who feels it necessary to mention that his new puppy cost so many of hundreds of dollars per pound? Yeah, I know the type.

This is also the man who nearly kicked his pregnant wife out of his car when her water broke in his new corvette on their way to the hospital

 

[Imdanny]

Like my Uncle Scrooge who doesn't give a dang about anyone but himself and hovers over my grandfather like a vulture. May the paramedics find my uncle before he drowns in his room full of gold coins.

My mother told me "his investments tanked." I guess he'll have to live on his full retirement, the maximum amount of Social Security that could be awarded to a human being, his remaining investments, and the two houses he owns free and clear.

Some people have problems. I'd feel a lot better about him if he hadn't absurdly accused me of stealing from my grandmother after her death and threatened to sue me or if he had ever raised a finger to help my mother in the last 25 years.

I tell you, that's one funeral I won't be attending.

 

[MonkeyPie]

I must be the opposite kind of annoyance - I loooove to tell people how LITTLE I paid for something. Someone will tell me my shirt is cute and out of my mouth flies, "Thanks, got it at Target for $3!" I can't seem to help it lol.

 

[jstarfireb]

I must be the opposite kind of annoyance - I loooove to tell people how LITTLE I paid for something. Someone will tell me my shirt is cute and out of my mouth flies, "Thanks, got it at Target for $3!" I can't seem to help it lol.

+1!

 

[Imdanny]

I love getting bargains! It's funny because when I was very young I cared about money as much as you might expect an 18th century aristocrat to care about it. I had discernment, I had means, I wanted what I wanted. Now I drive my car 45 mph (and annoy the heck out of people!) because I don't want to spend my money on gas. Now I'm proud of having just bought a winter wardrobe at Savers for $25. I come from a family that's very conservative with money and it's like I wasn't born with that gene, but I've learned it over the years. I might have a little of my Scottish ancestor's frugality in me after all. Life's too much work to waste money. You only screw yourself by not being "cheap" when it's reasonably possible. Just my opinion.

 

[Tuckins1]

I must be the opposite kind of annoyance - I loooove to tell people how LITTLE I paid for something. Someone will tell me my shirt is cute and out of my mouth flies, "Thanks, got it at Target for $3!" I can't seem to help it lol.

Yeah, THIS is fine, because maybe I can find out about a good deal from someone else, or they can hear about one from me!

 

[CUSO]

I deal with this in my family regularly. Those who have the $ don't have anything to prove, weAr crappy clothes, drive older (paid for cars) live in a nice (paid off) home and nobody knows. My brother for instance is quite the opposite. He bought a 65k car and makes 1100 car payments, maxes his mortgage out, buys very expensive clothes on credit, just so every now and then someone acknowledges his perceived wealth. For me, I don't like any attention given to my finances. Take for instance my wifes Patek watch. Nobody has ever noticed it. It is our secret which we love.

 

[radiantquest]

I agree that it seems like people who really do have $ to speak of dont flaunt it and the people that are tapped with credit pretend they are wealthy. There is a girl that I worked with that is like that. Always talking about how much this and that she has. How many houses she has and all that. I always shake my head because she looks like she could be a prostitute. Perhaps with some of that money someone could teach her how to apply makeup and find a salon that doesnt make her hair look like a plastic wig.

 

[Lula]

I deal with this in my family regularly. Those who have the $ don't have anything to prove, weAr crappy clothes, drive older (paid for cars) live in a nice (paid off) home and nobody knows. My brother for instance is quite the opposite. He bought a 65k car and makes 1100 car payments, maxes his mortgage out, buys very expensive clothes on credit, just so every now and then someone acknowledges his perceived wealth. For me, I don't like any attention given to my finances. Take for instance my wifes Patek watch. Nobody has ever noticed it. It is our secret which we love.

I agree. I see this all the time with my "old money" friends. I call it the "stealth wealth" look. Worn but clean clothes, understated always, and high-quality, but understated, jewelry. They avoid trendy brands like the plague, but do pay for quality. No need to buy with credit -- they pay with cash. And brag -- never. They also give a lot back to the community in terms of time and money, but don't brag about that either.

The "new money" lives in the track-mansions and buzzes around town in Hummers and enormous SUVs and tries to avoid slipping on the ice in their de rigueur outfits of pressed jeans, pointy boots, lots of cheap-looking-but-pricy costume jewelry, and a starched white blouse with blown out puffy hair too big for their frames -- waiting for the producers of Real Housewives to call, I guess.

 

[Imdanny]

I deal with this in my family regularly. Those who have the $ don't have anything to prove, weAr crappy clothes, drive older (paid for cars) live in a nice (paid off) home and nobody knows. My brother for instance is quite the opposite. He bought a 65k car and makes 1100 car payments, maxes his mortgage out, buys very expensive clothes on credit, just so every now and then someone acknowledges his perceived wealth. For me, I don't like any attention given to my finances. Take for instance my wifes Patek watch. Nobody has ever noticed it. It is our secret which we love.

I'm a watch person. I would notice it from 10 feet away. (But I see what you're saying.)

 

[Imdanny]

I always shake my head because she looks like she could be a prostitute.

LOL!

 

[Madam Bijoux]

The ones who amaze me (not family members, just acquaintances) are the ones who ask me what I paid for things and then get pi$$ed off, resentful, etc when I tell them.

 

[rosetta]

It's pure jealousy Madame!

I have a bad habit of calling out other people's catty or snide remarks.

Funny, they don't seem to do them anymore

 

[iLander]

corvette

(I'm a car snob AND in a bad mood, watch out for me today)

Yup, I know the type . . .

 

[iLander]

The ones who amaze me (not family members, just acquaintances) are the ones who ask me what I paid for things and then get pi$$ed off, resentful, etc when I tell them.

BINGO! This has happened to me too!

Why the h@ll do they ask if they are going to get all pissy? What answer are they hoping for? "This? No, it's a fake, what you own is so much better" Is that what they want to hear?

 

[iLander]

I think a lot of uninformed people don't understand small business people: if you have employees, you are pulling enough money out of your pocket (and it IS your pocket) to provide a livelihood for other people. Entire salaries, enough to support a family.

So Mister Average Stockbroker probably makes a lot less money than Mr Plumbing Company owner. But Mr Broker spends his money on a new Porsche every year (gotta maximize that depreciation!), the largest possible SUV for the wifey, the biggest Garagemahal available and has no money left at the end of the month. Meanwhile, Mr Plumber, with his old pickup, and paid off house, is providing salaries for 6 employees and probably is putting away money for his retirement.

Mr Plumber's kids are learning about hard work and earning your pay. Mr Broker's kids will go into this world thinking everyone owes them something and that work is for suckers. Mr Plumbers kids might have actual SKILLS, while Mr Broker's kids can only push paper around and suck up to the boss.

As far a dressing like you have money, I think that's for people that DON'T have money. And frankly, I don't get how a $300 Saks T-shirt looks any different than my $15 Gap T-shirt. Seriously, if they're both black, and they're both T-shirts? Also, I see a lot of wealthy babes that are total fashion victims! Some fawning salesperson talked them into a $900 jumpsuit!

 

[iLander]

I deal with this in my family regularly. Those who have the $ don't have anything to prove, weAr crappy clothes, drive older (paid for cars) live in a nice (paid off) home and nobody knows. My brother for instance is quite the opposite. He bought a 65k car and makes 1100 car payments, maxes his mortgage out, buys very expensive clothes on credit, just so every now and then someone acknowledges his perceived wealth. For me, I don't like any attention given to my finances. Take for instance my wifes Patek watch. Nobody has ever noticed it. It is our secret which we love.

I agree. I see this all the time with my "old money" friends. I call it the "stealth wealth" look. Worn but clean clothes, understated always, and high-quality, but understated, jewelry. They avoid trendy brands like the plague, but do pay for quality. No need to buy with credit -- they pay with cash. And brag -- never. They also give a lot back to the community in terms of time and money, but don't brag about that either.

The "new money" lives in the track-mansions and buzzes around town in Hummers and enormous SUVs and tries to avoid slipping on the ice in their de rigueur outfits of pressed jeans, pointy boots, lots of cheap-looking-but-pricy costume jewelry, and a starched white blouse with blown out puffy hair too big for their frames -- waiting for the producers of Real Housewives to call, I guess.

LOve this, so true!

 

[Tuckins1]

I agree that it seems like people who really do have $ to speak of dont flaunt it and the people that are tapped with credit pretend they are wealthy. There is a girl that I worked with that is like that. Always talking about how much this and that she has. How many houses she has and all that. I always shake my head because she looks like she could be a prostitute. Perhaps with some of that money someone could teach her how to apply makeup and find a salon that doesnt make her hair look like a plastic wig.

I have friends like this. They buy expensive, showy stuff that SCREAMS "look at me" and then talk about how humble they are and how money doesn't mean anything to them (meanwhile they are mortgaged and in debt up to their eye balls). DH and I drive sensible cars, have no mortgage, and live pretty normal lives, with almost no debt and a healthy bank account. When they make comments about "well, average people like you and me just can't afford _____"... I just roll my eyes.

 

[CUSO]

Unfortunate situation. 9 months ago I bought my wife a 2010 Toyota Highlander Limited to haul the kids arround in style (she refuses a mini van). Her friend called her (who calls at least twice per week) and my wife informed her of the new car, her friends 1st question was "How much is your monthly payment?" My wife responded (before I could get to her) "There is no payment, we paid cash". Well her friend has not called her untill just yesterday. It is sad, but I always tell my peers that my parents/inlaws purchased me an expensive item, so I dont get these types of reactions. It is unfortunate and sad, but reality.

 

[NovemberBride]

I think a lot of uninformed people don't understand small business people: if you have employees, you are pulling enough money out of your pocket (and it IS your pocket) to provide a livelihood for other people. Entire salaries, enough to support a family.

So Mister Average Stockbroker probably makes a lot less money than Mr Plumbing Company owner. But Mr Broker spends his money on a new Porsche every year (gotta maximize that depreciation!), the largest possible SUV for the wifey, the biggest Garagemahal available and has no money left at the end of the month. Meanwhile, Mr Plumber, with his old pickup, and paid off house, is providing salaries for 6 employees and probably is putting away money for his retirement.

Mr Plumber's kids are learning about hard work and earning your pay. Mr Broker's kids will go into this world thinking everyone owes them something and that work is for suckers. Mr Plumbers kids might have actual SKILLS, while Mr Broker's kids can only push paper around and suck up to the boss.

As far a dressing like you have money, I think that's for people that DON'T have money. And frankly, I don't get how a $300 Saks T-shirt looks any different than my $15 Gap T-shirt. Seriously, if they're both black, and they're both T-shirts? Also, I see a lot of wealthy babes that are total fashion victims! Some fawning salesperson talked them into a $900 jumpsuit!

Judgmental much? Stereotype much? How many stockbrokers do you actually know? I happen to know many, I'm an attorney who has worked for financial services clients for my entire career and I have a lot of friends in the industry as well. Sure, there are some brokers who drive Hummers, but there are plenty who drive Hondas. As far as saving for retirement, since these men and women are in financial services and most of them have degrees in finance, all of the ones I know make saving for retirement a priority.

And wow, insulting their kids too! Most of my friends who are stockbrokers make their kids' education a top priority - I'll be sure to let them know that their kids are never going to learn any real skills due to their parents profession so they should just save their money and stop saving for college

I don't get this whole thread. New money or old money- all the same to me - one is not better than the other. I could care less if people throw their money around or hide it. Why let it bother you so much?

 

[CUSO]

Judgmental much? Stereotype much? How many stockbrokers do you actually know? I happen to know many, I'm an attorney who has worked for financial services clients for my entire career and I have a lot of friends in the industry as well. Sure, there are some brokers who drive Hummers, but there are plenty who drive Hondas. As far as saving for retirement, since these men and women are in financial services and most of them have degrees in finance, all of the ones I know make saving for retirement a priority.

Agreed, a bit judgmental.


And wow, insulting their kids too! Most of my friends who are stockbrokers make their kids' education a top priority - I'll be sure to let them know that their kids are never going to learn any real skills due to their parents profession so they should just save their money and stop saving for college

Again, judgmental.

I don't get this whole thread. New money or old money- all the same to me - one is not better than the other. I could care less if people throw their money around or hide it. Why let it bother you so much?[/quote]

This is where we diverge. Look at the financial disaster this country is in. Why? Because people dont handle their fincnaces properly. Why am I having to pay a 6 figure tax bill this year (I am not a business owner)? Because I need to subsidize those who threw arround their money improperly. They bought too big of a home, too much of a car, credit cards maxed out. Why let it bother me? Are you serious? People with old money typically dont fall into these debt traps, they are my least concern. I knew we were in trouble 6 years ago. When I was an executive for a large company of 1000 employees, I drove a Honda Accord. I would always notice the parking lot at work. It was filled with Lexus, Mercedes, Hummers, Bmw's, and this was a parking lot for employees that were 6 levels below me, they were the workerbees. I knew I was not paying them enough to comfortably afford those cars. That is when I knew that when people throw their money arround, I would someday have to pay for their poor decisions.

 

[NovemberBride]

CUSO,

I do agree with you that our current economy is a financial disaster and I hear you on the tax bill (I don't even want to think about what I'll be paying in April), but I don't think it is as simple as blaming it on people with new money. I have friends who come from a lot of old money that spent it very foolishly because they did not earn it so it was easy come, easy go. I have friends with new money that came from poorer backgrounds and so are now very careful with their money. I also have friends with old money that are careful with their money, and friends with new money that can't spend it fast enough. Contrary to your experience, in my experience people with old money do fall into these debt traps (unless you are talking people with so much money that it doesn't matter, but everyone with old money doesn't fall into that category).

 

[NewEnglandLady]

CUSO, I think your scenario is more about people who have debt vs. people who have accumulated wealth as opposed to people with new money vs. old money.

I do feel that on average, those with new money feel they have more to prove and are less likely to spend their money wisely. I, personally, don't care what a person spends his/her money on. I don't have much exposure to the obnoxious, bragging type, but I also realize that people who spend frivolously won't have money for long.

Everybody makes financial mistakes in their life, all you can hope is that people learn from them!

 

[CUSO]

You know what? I think the confusion is comming from my dfinitions of old and new $.

Old money to me means people who have had money for a generation at least and have been tought how to maintain the $.

New money to me means, recently wealthy, i know, but in reality most of the percieved recent wealthy are fake, wannabes with maxed out bills just so people will percieve them as wealthy

 

[chemgirl]

I don't think its even and "old" verses "new" money distinction. I personally don't know anybody who could be defined as "old money" in the true sense. A lot of people who are financially comfortable and have been for generations, but nobody with trust funds etc. I do, however, know a lot of people who want to appear wealthy when they are not. I find it has less to do with background and more to do with self esteem. I could be wrong though since I don't personally know anybody who is "old money".

For example, we were at lunch with a couple we know and we found out that they were looking for a car. We were also looking for a new car and we decided to check out the Audi/Volkswagon dealership across the street from the restaurant. We test drove a lot of cars and we all loved the look of the new Audi convertible. However, we had a budget in mind and we were going to stick to it. The dealer told us about a 2010 fully loaded Golf they had in the back that they were trying to sell (the 2011 were out at this point). He said they could give it to us for the price of a bare bones 2011. We thought we were going to have to fight the other couple for the car, but no. They bought the Audi convertible. I know they make considerably less than DH and I. I also know that their living expenses are higher and they have significant debt. All of their clothes are expensive brands (think Chanel with big C's all over the place) and they won't even go to the gym when they're not looking their best. Its totally an attention thing.

 

[April20]

I must be the opposite kind of annoyance - I loooove to tell people how LITTLE I paid for something. Someone will tell me my shirt is cute and out of my mouth flies, "Thanks, got it at Target for $3!" I can't seem to help it lol.

I do the same thing. I keep telling myself to keep my mouth shut, say thank you and move one, but nooooooo I just have to tell them where I got it and what rock bottom price I paid for it