Tacori E-ring
Super_Ideal_Rock
- Joined
- Aug 15, 2005
- Messages
- 20,041
Another crib recall.
PS Mommy Thread-Newborn to 12 months!
- Thread starter neatfreak
- Start date
sunkist
Ideal_Rock
- Joined
- Nov 15, 2005
- Messages
- 2,964
OH, Mandy, I"m so sorry about the hubby situation! I wish I could give some advice, but things are kind of tense between my hubby and I right now too... Here''s major (((HUGS))))!
For me, I hope it''s just my hormones. We''re not communicating well though and I''m expecting things of him that he''s not doing and he feels left out from baby and I. Also I think he''s a little mad at me for having a grudge against the dog right now. Last night we finally at least talked to eachother about how we were feeling and what was bothering us. What exactly we''re going to do to fix it, I"m not sure. Hopefully just being aware will help us.
He never held a baby before our Wesley, and I was stubborn before the birth and didn''t sign us up for any baby care classes. I thought they''d be a waste of money. But now I really see it would have helped DH be more confident with being a daddy. I feel so bad!
I''m looking for a daddy bootcamp at hospital he can attend, and hoping that will help make him a little more comfortable. Has anyone''s hubby''s been to a Daddy Bootcamp?? I''m looking for something that would be helpful to him now that we already have a 3 month old. My hospital said their babycare class was just about umbilical cord care, and what newborns look like and stuff... I guess we''re past the umbilical cord stuff
Amber, that Totally stinks about your birth control!! I agree though, maybe the doc could prescribe for irregular periods
hope it helps.
Oh my goodness, Blen, I can''t wait to see his glasses!! He''ll be so adorable in them
Cute, cute babies!! Ellie, Julian, Sophia, sorry if I missed anyone else. Love it!
For me, I hope it''s just my hormones. We''re not communicating well though and I''m expecting things of him that he''s not doing and he feels left out from baby and I. Also I think he''s a little mad at me for having a grudge against the dog right now. Last night we finally at least talked to eachother about how we were feeling and what was bothering us. What exactly we''re going to do to fix it, I"m not sure. Hopefully just being aware will help us.
He never held a baby before our Wesley, and I was stubborn before the birth and didn''t sign us up for any baby care classes. I thought they''d be a waste of money. But now I really see it would have helped DH be more confident with being a daddy. I feel so bad!
I''m looking for a daddy bootcamp at hospital he can attend, and hoping that will help make him a little more comfortable. Has anyone''s hubby''s been to a Daddy Bootcamp?? I''m looking for something that would be helpful to him now that we already have a 3 month old. My hospital said their babycare class was just about umbilical cord care, and what newborns look like and stuff... I guess we''re past the umbilical cord stuff
Amber, that Totally stinks about your birth control!! I agree though, maybe the doc could prescribe for irregular periods
Oh my goodness, Blen, I can''t wait to see his glasses!! He''ll be so adorable in them
Cute, cute babies!! Ellie, Julian, Sophia, sorry if I missed anyone else. Love it!
ChargerGrrl
Ideal_Rock
- Joined
- Aug 17, 2005
- Messages
- 2,865
oh, what precious babies! I LOVE the pics
I posted this in the preggo thread, but thought i'd head over here to see if I could get any insight from the PS mamas:
Has anyone heard about the Embrace Double Breast Pump by Playtex? It retails for about $180, but I have the opportunity to score one (new & sealed) for $100. There doesn't seem to be much out there about it, but the majority of the reviews on Amazon are positive: http://www.amazon.com/Playtex-Embrace-Breast-Pump-System/dp/B0000TYHD2/ref=cm_cr_pr_product_top
Would LOVE to hear if you have any experience with this pump- THANKS!!
I posted this in the preggo thread, but thought i'd head over here to see if I could get any insight from the PS mamas:
Has anyone heard about the Embrace Double Breast Pump by Playtex? It retails for about $180, but I have the opportunity to score one (new & sealed) for $100. There doesn't seem to be much out there about it, but the majority of the reviews on Amazon are positive: http://www.amazon.com/Playtex-Embrace-Breast-Pump-System/dp/B0000TYHD2/ref=cm_cr_pr_product_top
Would LOVE to hear if you have any experience with this pump- THANKS!!
rockpaperscissors67
Shiny_Rock
- Joined
- Nov 8, 2005
- Messages
- 410
ChargerGrrl, I don''t have any experience with that pump, but I read a bunch of reviews while I was checking out the Medela Freestyle that I did buy. My personal rule has been to never buy a pump from a company that manufactures bottles or formula (long story, but I can explain if you want).
I saw a lot of reviews that said that the Embrace motor died after much less use than one should be able to expect from a pump. If you''re planning to pump every day during work, IMHO it''s super important to have a reliable pump because it would be horrible if the pump died at a time when you couldn''t run out and buy another easily.
If you want a cheaper option than a $200+ pump like Medela or Ameda, Amazon has the Lansinoh double electric pump for just a little over $100. Even though this is branded with the Lansinoh name, it''s the exact same pump as the Ameda Purely Yours. I have a PY that I used to pump every work day for 8 months with my older son and was *really* happy with it.
The PY is quite a bit more because it comes with a carrying case, insulated tote, ice packs, 6 collection bottles and several extra valves. The Lansinoh, OTOH, only comes with the pump and some extra valves, so if you''re pumping at work, you''d probably want to buy something to carry it in as well as figure out a way to store the pumped milk (emptying the collection bottles into a thermos would probably work).
I saw a lot of reviews that said that the Embrace motor died after much less use than one should be able to expect from a pump. If you''re planning to pump every day during work, IMHO it''s super important to have a reliable pump because it would be horrible if the pump died at a time when you couldn''t run out and buy another easily.
If you want a cheaper option than a $200+ pump like Medela or Ameda, Amazon has the Lansinoh double electric pump for just a little over $100. Even though this is branded with the Lansinoh name, it''s the exact same pump as the Ameda Purely Yours. I have a PY that I used to pump every work day for 8 months with my older son and was *really* happy with it.
The PY is quite a bit more because it comes with a carrying case, insulated tote, ice packs, 6 collection bottles and several extra valves. The Lansinoh, OTOH, only comes with the pump and some extra valves, so if you''re pumping at work, you''d probably want to buy something to carry it in as well as figure out a way to store the pumped milk (emptying the collection bottles into a thermos would probably work).
laine
Brilliant_Rock
- Joined
- Feb 21, 2006
- Messages
- 696
Date: 2/8/2010 5:20:16 PM
Author: AmberWaves
I''m kind of bummed about my insurance. The mail order company we have to use has been holding my birth control prescription hostage for a week now, only to find out my insurance (through the Catholic diocese, hubby works for the school system) doesn''t COVER BIRTH CONTROL. I have kickass maternity and pediatric coverage- our emergency c was only 250.00 in Los Angeles, but apparently they''re all about breeding. Now my birth control prescription cost me 94 dollars. NINETY FOUR DOLLARS!
I should just have #2 right away, it''ll save me 376.00 a year on birth control.
Amber--try planned parenthood for cheap birth control--thats what I did my first year out of college when I had no health insurance...
vizsla
Brilliant_Rock
- Joined
- Aug 23, 2005
- Messages
- 1,015
amber - those crazy catholics
i second trying planned parenthood.
sunkist - i have never heard of daddy bootcamp... he''s probably getting one just being at home with wes for the past three months
my best *advice* is to try and let your husband do as much with wes without watching as you can stand this was ***sooooooo**** hard for me to do, but DH is watching charlie every friday -- all day -- so i was forced for him to be involved. i didn''t want to be the *only* one who knew how to properly rock him to sleep, or burp him, or change his diaper, or give him a bath.. ya know? letting go is the *hardest* thing, particularly if you are used to being in control -- but it''s soooo worth it. while DH doesn''t do things *exactly* the way i think they should be done i don''t worry about charlie at home with dad at all.. i know that he can handle it. i still haven''t figured out how not to be
jealous of their time together, but knowing that charlie is with one of us makes up for it... somewhat
. i would start by maybe scheduling a shopping trip, or a long lunch while DH watches wes. baby steps for him to get comfortable being a daddy and, probably most importantly, baby steps for you to be comfortable with him caring for wes solo
speaking of DH relationships... we had another blow out this morning. as predicted he thought that since i''m not sobbing for 30mins before i leave in the morning that i''m completely happy with our situation. UGH. so i made some snide not nice comment before heading out the door today and then felt bad on my way to work.... anyhoo we are talking tonight. DH has a tenancy to ignore issues instead of talking about them. it''s like pulling teeth to get him to sit down and properly discuss anything. anyhoo it''s on the agenda for tonight
.
the discussion with my boss went as i thought. the job is still there if i want it. no *real* flexibility in hours or the option to work from home. i''m trying to make the best of the situation right now and stay as positive as i can muster... bleh... it''s only wednesday.
fiery - that pic of sophia is be-YOND sweet.. OMG she totally makes me smile!
and have i told you how much a love me a baby with hair! i''ve got baldy mcbaldspot i wish he had a little something... guess he takes after daddy
sunkist - i have never heard of daddy bootcamp... he''s probably getting one just being at home with wes for the past three months
my best *advice* is to try and let your husband do as much with wes without watching as you can stand this was ***sooooooo**** hard for me to do, but DH is watching charlie every friday -- all day -- so i was forced for him to be involved. i didn''t want to be the *only* one who knew how to properly rock him to sleep, or burp him, or change his diaper, or give him a bath.. ya know? letting go is the *hardest* thing, particularly if you are used to being in control -- but it''s soooo worth it. while DH doesn''t do things *exactly* the way i think they should be done i don''t worry about charlie at home with dad at all.. i know that he can handle it. i still haven''t figured out how not to be
speaking of DH relationships... we had another blow out this morning. as predicted he thought that since i''m not sobbing for 30mins before i leave in the morning that i''m completely happy with our situation. UGH. so i made some snide not nice comment before heading out the door today and then felt bad on my way to work.... anyhoo we are talking tonight. DH has a tenancy to ignore issues instead of talking about them. it''s like pulling teeth to get him to sit down and properly discuss anything. anyhoo it''s on the agenda for tonight
the discussion with my boss went as i thought. the job is still there if i want it. no *real* flexibility in hours or the option to work from home. i''m trying to make the best of the situation right now and stay as positive as i can muster... bleh... it''s only wednesday.
fiery - that pic of sophia is be-YOND sweet.. OMG she totally makes me smile!
and have i told you how much a love me a baby with hair! i''ve got baldy mcbaldspot i wish he had a little something... guess he takes after daddy
mela lu
Ideal_Rock
- Joined
- Nov 21, 2006
- Messages
- 2,481
AmberWaves
Ideal_Rock
- Joined
- Oct 19, 2005
- Messages
- 3,672
Hey Mandy, hope things went well last night!
Mara: How did your first solo trip go?
Sunkist: I have no help regarding daddy bootcamp, Paul''s not too bad with Piper, he changes diapers and gives her her bath, but it kills me that when I give her to him he just kind of props her in the crook of his arm and continues watching TV, then when she gets fussy (who wouldn''t?? That''s boring as hell!) he says, "She wants Mommy".
No, she just wants to be INTERACTED WITH. I guess I should talk about that and not just assume he should know. I''m also super bad with talking. Haha.
Viz: Sorry you and DH have to have a talk, but hopefully it''ll be easier afterwards.
Thanks for the rec. for Planned Parenthood, it sounds like my only non 100 dollar a pop option.
Sorry if I forgot anyone, my brain is dead, why? I''M SICK! I''m so bummed. I''m so hoping to not pass it to Piper. Ugh, this sucks.
Mara: How did your first solo trip go?
Sunkist: I have no help regarding daddy bootcamp, Paul''s not too bad with Piper, he changes diapers and gives her her bath, but it kills me that when I give her to him he just kind of props her in the crook of his arm and continues watching TV, then when she gets fussy (who wouldn''t?? That''s boring as hell!) he says, "She wants Mommy".
Viz: Sorry you and DH have to have a talk, but hopefully it''ll be easier afterwards.
Thanks for the rec. for Planned Parenthood, it sounds like my only non 100 dollar a pop option.
Sorry if I forgot anyone, my brain is dead, why? I''M SICK! I''m so bummed. I''m so hoping to not pass it to Piper. Ugh, this sucks.
Mara
Super_Ideal_Rock
- Joined
- Oct 30, 2002
- Messages
- 31,003
amber, the trip went really well. i am a slow moving snail but it felt good to get out by myself and walk around and buy something even if it was just nursing bras, soup and diapers. my life now! hahaa.
sunkist, i don't know about a daddy bootcamp but i agree that just starting to get him more involved will help and he might even know more than either you or he thinks. i don't know exactly how hands on your hub is already, but maybe the next time you need to do something, give him to your hub and say 'watch him for 10 min ok' and head out of the room. or 'can you change his diaper, i have to pee'...haha. then after that works, progress to leaving them alone for an hour or so and going to get a coffee or for a walk. i think that the guys will figure it out if they are given the opportunity without mom hovering.
someone told me yesterday that the best piece of advice she ever got was to not FEAR the child but to just ENJOY them. i am rapidly finding that there are going to be times when i have no idea why he is crying, when all the 'basics' are checked off...but that might just be the way it is. so i can get stressed out about it, or just say well he's crying and he'll stop when he's ready. it is hard though, i guess as a mommy i am hard wired to think 'soothe the baby'.
oh and our newborn care class was just the basics too like you said, honestly i don't think it really taught either of us ALL that much, but it's kind of like trial by fire when the kid arrives. greg is so great with helping out but i think part of it has to do with me stressing the entire pregnancy that i was not in this alone and i expected it to be 50/50 (or as close as possible). i know once he goes back to work it will change as he will be needing more sleep and gone for the day, but for now we are doing almost everything together and it makes it so much easier since neither of us really knows what we are doing!
charger..i'll post this in the preggo thread too but the Ameda Purely Yours that RPS mentioned was highly recommended by our LC as comparable/better to the Medela PIS, and it is on diapers.com without the 'tote' for $149 and they usually have 10% coupons for first orders.
re: nursing tanks and bras..so i got to target and picked up a Gilligan O'Malley tank and a bra. i am apparently a DD, wow. the tank is the one with the holes in the boobs. both are comfy actually, i got the bra with no underwire and MAN is it sexy hahaa. not really but it was the only one without underwire so i had to forgo the other 'cute' ones for comfort. and speaking of tanks etc...when i was preggo i picked up one of those Assets slimming tanks from target. well i didn't realize it was a compression tank, or a light version of one. OW when you are 6 months pregnant. i hated it and never wore it again. i remembered i had it today and pulled it out, it fits great now and actually holds the boobs in AND it's pressing the flabbo belly in too but not crazy uncomfy. yay! i am so glad i kept it. and i was telling greg i wish they made nursing bras with the unsnap part because the material is super soft and gives me pretty good boob support. i might get another one just because.
fiery, that is a super cute pic!
i have made no progress on the pump i want to buy. GAH i need to decide soon so i dont just keep floating with the $15 week hospital pump. btw whoever else said that they had it as well but we have the elite Ameda from the hospital too.
rps... i have noticed that my right boob, where i am almost exclusively feeding the kid on now since the left was hurting too much is starting to produce more, so funny. i am pumping an extra ~5 min on the left in hopes it will keep up. hope i don't end up too lopsided or that the LC can help me with the latch on the left. i am wondering if the nipple shields come in larger sizes but don't think so. boo.
we are off to the newborn club again today for our last scheduled visit. i want to ask about this weird sharp angle bump on the back of his head, and ask if this mark on his eye is a small birthmark, we thought it was a bruise but it hasn't gone away. OH and his umbilical cord stump fell off this morning. YAY!!! he's a REAL BOY now. hehe.
sunkist, i don't know about a daddy bootcamp but i agree that just starting to get him more involved will help and he might even know more than either you or he thinks. i don't know exactly how hands on your hub is already, but maybe the next time you need to do something, give him to your hub and say 'watch him for 10 min ok' and head out of the room. or 'can you change his diaper, i have to pee'...haha. then after that works, progress to leaving them alone for an hour or so and going to get a coffee or for a walk. i think that the guys will figure it out if they are given the opportunity without mom hovering.
someone told me yesterday that the best piece of advice she ever got was to not FEAR the child but to just ENJOY them. i am rapidly finding that there are going to be times when i have no idea why he is crying, when all the 'basics' are checked off...but that might just be the way it is. so i can get stressed out about it, or just say well he's crying and he'll stop when he's ready. it is hard though, i guess as a mommy i am hard wired to think 'soothe the baby'.
oh and our newborn care class was just the basics too like you said, honestly i don't think it really taught either of us ALL that much, but it's kind of like trial by fire when the kid arrives. greg is so great with helping out but i think part of it has to do with me stressing the entire pregnancy that i was not in this alone and i expected it to be 50/50 (or as close as possible). i know once he goes back to work it will change as he will be needing more sleep and gone for the day, but for now we are doing almost everything together and it makes it so much easier since neither of us really knows what we are doing!
charger..i'll post this in the preggo thread too but the Ameda Purely Yours that RPS mentioned was highly recommended by our LC as comparable/better to the Medela PIS, and it is on diapers.com without the 'tote' for $149 and they usually have 10% coupons for first orders.
re: nursing tanks and bras..so i got to target and picked up a Gilligan O'Malley tank and a bra. i am apparently a DD, wow. the tank is the one with the holes in the boobs. both are comfy actually, i got the bra with no underwire and MAN is it sexy hahaa. not really but it was the only one without underwire so i had to forgo the other 'cute' ones for comfort. and speaking of tanks etc...when i was preggo i picked up one of those Assets slimming tanks from target. well i didn't realize it was a compression tank, or a light version of one. OW when you are 6 months pregnant. i hated it and never wore it again. i remembered i had it today and pulled it out, it fits great now and actually holds the boobs in AND it's pressing the flabbo belly in too but not crazy uncomfy. yay! i am so glad i kept it. and i was telling greg i wish they made nursing bras with the unsnap part because the material is super soft and gives me pretty good boob support. i might get another one just because.
fiery, that is a super cute pic!
i have made no progress on the pump i want to buy. GAH i need to decide soon so i dont just keep floating with the $15 week hospital pump. btw whoever else said that they had it as well but we have the elite Ameda from the hospital too.
rps... i have noticed that my right boob, where i am almost exclusively feeding the kid on now since the left was hurting too much is starting to produce more, so funny. i am pumping an extra ~5 min on the left in hopes it will keep up. hope i don't end up too lopsided or that the LC can help me with the latch on the left. i am wondering if the nipple shields come in larger sizes but don't think so. boo.
we are off to the newborn club again today for our last scheduled visit. i want to ask about this weird sharp angle bump on the back of his head, and ask if this mark on his eye is a small birthmark, we thought it was a bruise but it hasn't gone away. OH and his umbilical cord stump fell off this morning. YAY!!! he's a REAL BOY now. hehe.
sugarpie honeybun
Shiny_Rock
- Joined
- Feb 9, 2010
- Messages
- 299
Hi Ladies - quick question regarding thumb sucking. In the last few weeks DS has been shoving his hands in his mouth, but in the last few days he's been sucking his itsy bitsy thumb. I'm talking a "professional" thumb sucker
- not just putting in his mouth by chance. When I was pregnant with him, our u/s showed him sucking his thumb on one occassion, but our doctor said it's common while in utero. DS is only 4 months - is it possible that he is already a thumb sucker? Should we try to prevent him from doing it?
fieryred33143
Ideal_Rock
- Joined
- May 18, 2008
- Messages
- 6,689
SH-Yup, sounds like he''s an official thumb sucker
. Whether you should stop him or not really depends on you and how you want to handle it. It is easier to take away a pacifier habit than it is to take away thumb sucking because, well, you can''t take away the thumb
. But if that''s his way of self-soothing then he''s ok.
phoenixgirl
Ideal_Rock
- Joined
- Mar 20, 2003
- Messages
- 3,390
Mela, hope the weather in FL warms up soon!
Mandy, I hope you have gotten caught up on your sleep. Snoring is a tough thing; I hope you can find a solution that helps you. Honestly, I have been having so much insomnia recently and my preferred sleep position is sprawled out in the middle of the bed, so it''s occurred to me that maybe I should sleep in the guest room every so often when I really need a good night''s sleep. I don''t think there''s anything wrong with that if it will help keep you sane.
Sunkist, have you found any Daddy classes? If not, do you guys have any friends with babies a similar age? Maybe a Daddy''s Day Out with babies would help him get more comfortable without you right there to tell him the "answers."
Viz, hope your talk tonight goes well. ((Hugs))
Sugarpie, Claire''s just started doing the same thing with her thumb. I wasn''t really worried because I don''t really see how to stop a child this small from doing it. I sucked mine until I was 5, at which point I felt embarrassed and stopped on my own (although I would sometimes wake up sucking it, which frustrated me).
Well, my return to work has been hardly that . . . of the 7 days I should have worked since last week, I''m now home on Snow Day #5. I was a little annoyed because they didn''t cancel school today until 45 minutes before I had to be there, so I had all my bags packed and had on one snow boot to clear off the car when the call came.
I did work yesterday, and then last night Claire woke up at 1 and 4:45. China, didn''t you say this is common when mom goes back to work? If they''d canceled school in a more time fashion, I could have slept in. Sigh.
Re: DHs. I''m a little annoyed with my DH because I have to work Monday and he doesn''t, and he was planning to take Claire in to daycare for a few hours so he could go on a mountain bike ride. Well, we just found out daycare is closed, so now he wants to try to take her to the gym babysitters (where the age minimum is 6 months and she is 3.5). Except for the first two days when I wanted to get her acclimated, I have kept her home with me every day we''ve had a snow day to spend extra time with her. I feel like he shouldn''t be so excited to hand her off to someone else on the one day he''ll spend alone with her. And I want him to see what a whole day alone with her is like.
But overall I know I have no reason to complain. I have put DH through a lot in the last couple of weeks with my trouble sleeping (sometimes I loudly announce, "I can''t sleep!" in the middle of the night, and while it''s not like I''m poking him until he wakes up, obviously I''m not trying to avoid that either). Last night he went to the grocery store because I was too tired, and he''s taken care of dinner every night (which is usually take-out, although he''ll cook if plan it and do the shopping, and I decided I can''t even do the latter anymore). And he still gets Claire up for me during every night feeding. Before I went back to work, he would usually get up with Claire after the 6 a.m. feeding and let me sleep in a couple of extra hours. Now that I''m back to work, he spends an hour with her in the morning and then takes her to daycare. Both days I worked (ha!) she was still asleep when I left, so he had to dress her, change her diaper, feed her, etc. He''s a superstar; I know he is. I think we''re all just exhausted, and it''s easy to direct frustration toward the DH because he''s the only person around who isn''t a tiny baby.
Re DHs: um, just generalizing here, but men like concrete suggestions, right? So I''d try to think of something specific to ask for -- a night to sleep uninterrupted, to be on diaper duty at night, to cook dinner, whatever. Viz, maybe your DH is just frustrated because he doesn''t know how to help? If you give him something concrete to do for you, he might feel less helpless. And Mandy, I say eat cheese for dinner if you want it! I can just see you: "Oh sorry honey, did you want more than cheese for dinner?" When I was extolling the virtues of me quitting in a few months, DH said something about how it''d be nice because I''d be able to make dinner again. Oh no, is that what that means? And we''ve also agreed that we should get rid of the Merry Maids to save the $2k+ we spend on them per year, at least until we see how our budget works out, so I know staying at home is something I''ll really need to gear up for.
Re work: I told my dept. head that I might not return after this year, and she was like, "Yeah, I know." Ha! I thought I was breaking bad news to her. She remembered that we had talked about this when she first offered me the AP classes last year. This makes me feel better, but I''m still reserving judgment. Yesterday was a fun teaching day, and I know that will be hard to give up.
Mandy, I hope you have gotten caught up on your sleep. Snoring is a tough thing; I hope you can find a solution that helps you. Honestly, I have been having so much insomnia recently and my preferred sleep position is sprawled out in the middle of the bed, so it''s occurred to me that maybe I should sleep in the guest room every so often when I really need a good night''s sleep. I don''t think there''s anything wrong with that if it will help keep you sane.
Sunkist, have you found any Daddy classes? If not, do you guys have any friends with babies a similar age? Maybe a Daddy''s Day Out with babies would help him get more comfortable without you right there to tell him the "answers."
Viz, hope your talk tonight goes well. ((Hugs))
Sugarpie, Claire''s just started doing the same thing with her thumb. I wasn''t really worried because I don''t really see how to stop a child this small from doing it. I sucked mine until I was 5, at which point I felt embarrassed and stopped on my own (although I would sometimes wake up sucking it, which frustrated me).
Well, my return to work has been hardly that . . . of the 7 days I should have worked since last week, I''m now home on Snow Day #5. I was a little annoyed because they didn''t cancel school today until 45 minutes before I had to be there, so I had all my bags packed and had on one snow boot to clear off the car when the call came.
I did work yesterday, and then last night Claire woke up at 1 and 4:45. China, didn''t you say this is common when mom goes back to work? If they''d canceled school in a more time fashion, I could have slept in. Sigh.
Re: DHs. I''m a little annoyed with my DH because I have to work Monday and he doesn''t, and he was planning to take Claire in to daycare for a few hours so he could go on a mountain bike ride. Well, we just found out daycare is closed, so now he wants to try to take her to the gym babysitters (where the age minimum is 6 months and she is 3.5). Except for the first two days when I wanted to get her acclimated, I have kept her home with me every day we''ve had a snow day to spend extra time with her. I feel like he shouldn''t be so excited to hand her off to someone else on the one day he''ll spend alone with her. And I want him to see what a whole day alone with her is like.
But overall I know I have no reason to complain. I have put DH through a lot in the last couple of weeks with my trouble sleeping (sometimes I loudly announce, "I can''t sleep!" in the middle of the night, and while it''s not like I''m poking him until he wakes up, obviously I''m not trying to avoid that either). Last night he went to the grocery store because I was too tired, and he''s taken care of dinner every night (which is usually take-out, although he''ll cook if plan it and do the shopping, and I decided I can''t even do the latter anymore). And he still gets Claire up for me during every night feeding. Before I went back to work, he would usually get up with Claire after the 6 a.m. feeding and let me sleep in a couple of extra hours. Now that I''m back to work, he spends an hour with her in the morning and then takes her to daycare. Both days I worked (ha!) she was still asleep when I left, so he had to dress her, change her diaper, feed her, etc. He''s a superstar; I know he is. I think we''re all just exhausted, and it''s easy to direct frustration toward the DH because he''s the only person around who isn''t a tiny baby.
Re DHs: um, just generalizing here, but men like concrete suggestions, right? So I''d try to think of something specific to ask for -- a night to sleep uninterrupted, to be on diaper duty at night, to cook dinner, whatever. Viz, maybe your DH is just frustrated because he doesn''t know how to help? If you give him something concrete to do for you, he might feel less helpless. And Mandy, I say eat cheese for dinner if you want it! I can just see you: "Oh sorry honey, did you want more than cheese for dinner?" When I was extolling the virtues of me quitting in a few months, DH said something about how it''d be nice because I''d be able to make dinner again. Oh no, is that what that means? And we''ve also agreed that we should get rid of the Merry Maids to save the $2k+ we spend on them per year, at least until we see how our budget works out, so I know staying at home is something I''ll really need to gear up for.
Re work: I told my dept. head that I might not return after this year, and she was like, "Yeah, I know." Ha! I thought I was breaking bad news to her. She remembered that we had talked about this when she first offered me the AP classes last year. This makes me feel better, but I''m still reserving judgment. Yesterday was a fun teaching day, and I know that will be hard to give up.
fieryred33143
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anchor31
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Sorry to here about everyone''s troubles with their DHs. We had a fight last night too. DH is a huge gamer and he''s been playing even more than usual since Jacob is born. He''s aware that he''s been playing a lot and says he''ll play less but he doesn''t. And then he complains he "doesn''t have time to do anything". It drives me NUTS! Last night for once he didn''t play and balanced his budget, and when I asked him if he would give Jacob the bottle I''d pumped when Jacob started crying, he complained that he couldn''t do anything without being interrupted every 15 minutes. Well, welcome to my life! He ended up staying up late and giving Jacob the bottle before putting him to bed while I went to sleep, but I''m definitely getting resentful. We''d agreed that I wouldn''t have to do all the housework like I did when I was on preventive leave during my pregnancy, but things haven''t changed. And DH wanted this baby so much, why in the world do I always have to ask him if he would change a diaper or give a bath? Anyway, I''m just venting here, we''ll definitely have to talk. I''m not looking forward to it though, it always turns into a "who does more" competition...
sugarpie honeybun
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Date: 2/10/2010 12:32:31 PM
Author: fiery
Also Sugarpie I really want to know who you were before!!
Were you on the pregnant psers thread with us? Have you posted on this thread before?
Process of elimination
Fiery - I like your determination! Ha ha. I’ve been a member of PS since ’07, mainly as a lurker but did contribute to BWW 'back in the day' and other forums on occasion (Show me the Ring, The Hangout, etc). I also chimed in on this thread on occassion after DS was born. I was never able to contribute as often as I wanted (due to work – hence the change of screen name).
I know that’s totally vague…
----------
PG & fiery -Thanks for the input on thumb sucking. Neither DH nor I sucked our thumbs as kids, so this sort of surprised us. I’m all for self-soothing and am happy letting him continue to suck away, if that makes him happy. Just as long as it’s not a “nervous” habit (I tend to look too deeply into things)
We better get an early start on the orthodontist fund!
fieryred33143
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MonkeyPie
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Date: 2/10/2010 1:35:02 PM
Author: fiery
I know what you mean. Sophia has a habit of pulling her hair when she''s falling asleep. She doesn''t tug on it, she just likes to feel her hair for some reason. MIL once told me she was doing it because she has mental issues.
OMG lol! That gave me a good giggle, but shame on MIL, jeez lol.
Fiery, Sophia is SO cute, every picture of her just makes me smile. She should be a Gerber baby or something
vizsla
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Date: 2/10/2010 1:35:02 PM
Author: fiery
I know what you mean. Sophia has a habit of pulling her hair when she's falling asleep. She doesn't tug on it, she just likes to feel her hair for some reason. MIL once told me she was doing it because she has mental issues.
OH NO SHE DIDN'T!
question: i was going to post a separate topic but maybe this is the better forum for it. i know there are sooooo many variables so it's hard to give a precise dollar amount to an arbitrary term like 'comfortable'. but in your particular nape of the neck, what would a family income have to be in order for you to 'be comfortable'. i.e. for those women who have chosen to stay home and live off of DH salary, are you comfortable? i sometimes wonder if i have high expectations of what it takes to live off of one salary. and i look around at friends who stay home and wonder.. 'gosh i wonder how they do it?' or are there just too many factors.
i'll give you a for instance:
ETA: fiery, gosh, i just re-read this and i totally didn't mean to imply that you were miserable- i just take solace in the fact that i'm not alone... hmmmm trying to think how i could have better worded that one, way to go viz
Sabine
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Soooo behind, oh well! We're finally back on schedule after our insane trip home from Pittsburgh, I'm surprised at how quickly Jacks bounced back. He's teething insanely and I can't wait for a tooth to finally break through! And dh is actually on a pretty decent rotation for the next 2 weeks, so doesn't have to leave till 6:30 (which is late for us!) and gets home around 4:30!
And here's my favorite pic from the one playdate we got to have with Robin and Des! ETA Robin is Robbie if that wasn't clear!
On a bummer note, I still look pregnant in the pics we do have of our impromptu baptism, and that makes me sad =(.
And here's my favorite pic from the one playdate we got to have with Robin and Des! ETA Robin is Robbie if that wasn't clear!
On a bummer note, I still look pregnant in the pics we do have of our impromptu baptism, and that makes me sad =(.
sunkist
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So it sounds like we''re all havingsome hubby issues , I guess thats life, figuring out how to make all of this work!
Thanks All re: daddy issues! I found a daddy bootcamp, but I need to call to see if the next scheduled one for this Sat is full. They have one per month ,its even free! Veteran daddies show new daddies the ropes. Even though its still designed for expecting daddies, I think he could at least still ask all the questions he wants.
I totally understand you all, how leaving them alone together will increase his confidence. He has been soooo busy at work since Wes was born. Now he actually has some time off, so maybe I can escape and leave them home alone more. I have left them a few times to go to the gym and I got a massage once. But he''s still afraid he''ll break Wes and he''s kind of stiff when he holds him.
Did your hubbies have any baby experience at all before your own, or were they like my hub and never held a baby in his life??
PG, I wll ask hubby if he wants to talk to any of our daddy friends. Thanks! good idea
I have tried to be silent at home and let him figure things out on his own, but he still tells me that I tell him he''s doing stuff wrong and that he wants me to teach him cause he is first time at all this stuff. Ahhhhh.
But on a better note, we had a better day yesterday. Even finished off the evening in front of the fireplace together!
haha
Speaking of which I am finally proud to say that we got past the hurdle of DTD after all the pain
It was a big hurdle cause gosh was it painful the first couple times!
PG and Mandy, you have me cracking up about "more than just cheese for dinner?" Love it!
Viz, good luck with your hubby talk tonight. I hope you guys can solve something!
Anchor, my hubby loves video games too. Its his personal time that he doesnt get all that much of, but when he does he often stays up very late at night doing it. I try to let him have his "me time". I know he needs it as much as I do. I guess I just hope that since I give him his video game time he''ll give me breaks too. What I most want though is for him to come to bed with me so we can cuddle and talk about our day.
Awww, this becoming new parents is tough work. Hubby thinks we''re doing it wrong
But everyyone is a first time parent and has no idea what to do! So how can we be doing it wrong?
Fiery, mental issues!??
haha Ohh MILs.
, I guess thats life, figuring out how to make all of this work!Thanks All re: daddy issues! I found a daddy bootcamp, but I need to call to see if the next scheduled one for this Sat is full. They have one per month ,its even free! Veteran daddies show new daddies the ropes. Even though its still designed for expecting daddies, I think he could at least still ask all the questions he wants.
I totally understand you all, how leaving them alone together will increase his confidence. He has been soooo busy at work since Wes was born. Now he actually has some time off, so maybe I can escape and leave them home alone more. I have left them a few times to go to the gym and I got a massage once. But he''s still afraid he''ll break Wes and he''s kind of stiff when he holds him.
Did your hubbies have any baby experience at all before your own, or were they like my hub and never held a baby in his life??
PG, I wll ask hubby if he wants to talk to any of our daddy friends. Thanks! good idea
I have tried to be silent at home and let him figure things out on his own, but he still tells me that I tell him he''s doing stuff wrong and that he wants me to teach him cause he is first time at all this stuff. Ahhhhh.
But on a better note, we had a better day yesterday. Even finished off the evening in front of the fireplace together!
Speaking of which I am finally proud to say that we got past the hurdle of DTD after all the pain
PG and Mandy, you have me cracking up about "more than just cheese for dinner?" Love it!
Viz, good luck with your hubby talk tonight. I hope you guys can solve something!
Anchor, my hubby loves video games too. Its his personal time that he doesnt get all that much of, but when he does he often stays up very late at night doing it. I try to let him have his "me time". I know he needs it as much as I do. I guess I just hope that since I give him his video game time he''ll give me breaks too. What I most want though is for him to come to bed with me so we can cuddle and talk about our day.
Awww, this becoming new parents is tough work. Hubby thinks we''re doing it wrong
Fiery, mental issues!??
anchor31
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E B
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A quick one from me to answer this question! Catch-up later.
viz, we live on my husband's salary alone and are comfortable. We can swing all of our bills and still have a decent amount left over to go into savings. We don't go without anything basic, and enjoy certain luxuries (premium cable, TiVo, iPhones, etc.) but we sacrifice as well. For example, we have a strict grocery budget, and we don't eat out very often. Fast food every now and then, but dinner in a nice restaurant? Hardly ever. We don't buy new clothes that often and only drive one car, which is completely paid off (husband works from home, so this works well). We also still rent, and don't anticipate being able to buy a home for a couple of years at least. We're actually moving to a more affordable area of the country so we can feel more comfortable with the area we live in. With my husband's job, this is possible.
If I was still working, we could afford more, but none of it's worth going my back to work...for us. Luckily, it looks like I might have an opportunity to work part-time from home, which I'll gladly take. It's incredibly flexible, though, something I can do during weekends and while kiddo naps during weekdays.
MustangGal
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Viz - a lot depends on where you live and what you define as comfortable. Our house was 150K (worth a bit less than that now), we only have 1 car payment (and 4 paid off cars
), and no other debt. Yet DH''s salary and mine combined is less than your "comfortable" amount. My DH was laid off when I was 7 months preggo. I figured we could work it out with him staying home with the baby and getting a PT job. He found a regular job after 5 weeks, so that plan didn''t go through. One thing I haven''t heard you mention about your situation is who has the benefits? Could you all go on to your DH''s insurance? That''s one of our issues, I have much better benefits with my company, and DH''s field is not stable right now (golf), so even if I had the desire to stay home, I couldn''t do it.
AmberWaves
Ideal_Rock
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Fiery, Piper does the hair thing, too, but she tugs at it. Kills me, since she has hair still and I''m like, "noo! It''s still pretty!!" She also found her hand not too long ago, and tries to suck her thumb, and it''s kind of cute because she just sticks the thumb in there and keeps the fingers splayed, almost like she''s making a face at us.
So yeah, bad cold here. What can I take for it?
So yeah, bad cold here. What can I take for it?
sugarpie honeybun
Shiny_Rock
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Viz – I’ve been following your struggle with work and will just chime in and say that I agree with MGal. It really depends on your definition of “comfortable”. In our city, the cost of living is so ridiculously high that it’s difficult for most families to get by on one income. DH and I also enjoy travelling, eating out, (and I might also have a slight obsession with Louis Vuitton handbags
) and based on DH’s salary, we would be giving up a lot of the (mostly unnecessary) material luxuries we’ve grown accustomed to if I didn't work. I’m sorry that you are struggling with this situation; I hope everything works itself out.
Fiery – ahh…gotta love the MIL comments. For what it’s worth, your MIL has helped me appreciate mine a whole lot more!
Amber - maybe a hot, steam shower with some Vicks? Unfortunately, colds just have to run the course. Drink lots of water and maybe some green tea? I take Zyrtec D (D = decongestant) which works wonders whenever I'm stuffy.
Fiery – ahh…gotta love the MIL comments. For what it’s worth, your MIL has helped me appreciate mine a whole lot more!
Amber - maybe a hot, steam shower with some Vicks? Unfortunately, colds just have to run the course. Drink lots of water and maybe some green tea? I take Zyrtec D (D = decongestant) which works wonders whenever I'm stuffy.
phoenixgirl
Ideal_Rock
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Viz, you described where we live almost exactly! Where exactly are you???
OK, you don''t have to tell me, but anyway . . .
I think based on what you said that $100k is comfortable. I think "pretty comfortable" could be $10k or $20k less with little to no debt and reasonable expenses. I also have a theory that our generation expects to have what our parents had in their golden years when they enter the workforce: nice house, nice cars, vacations, etc. Our parents didn''t fly off to $5 or $10k honeymoons in the Caribbean. But anyway . . .
I think that me staying home will knock us from "pretty comfortable" to "a little tight." And that is something of a concern. Neither DH nor I am super frugal. It''ll be a leap of faith, for sure. Luckily we have something of a safety net, and DH''s earnings will increase significantly in 18 months. Without those two things, I''m not sure I would be considering resignation. But then, hey, I''m a teacher, so I don''t make that much anyway!
So Viz, what are you thinking with the job offer?
I think based on what you said that $100k is comfortable. I think "pretty comfortable" could be $10k or $20k less with little to no debt and reasonable expenses. I also have a theory that our generation expects to have what our parents had in their golden years when they enter the workforce: nice house, nice cars, vacations, etc. Our parents didn''t fly off to $5 or $10k honeymoons in the Caribbean. But anyway . . .
I think that me staying home will knock us from "pretty comfortable" to "a little tight." And that is something of a concern. Neither DH nor I am super frugal. It''ll be a leap of faith, for sure. Luckily we have something of a safety net, and DH''s earnings will increase significantly in 18 months. Without those two things, I''m not sure I would be considering resignation. But then, hey, I''m a teacher, so I don''t make that much anyway!
So Viz, what are you thinking with the job offer?
fieryred33143
Ideal_Rock
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You're breastfeeding correct?
Stay far, far away from decongestants (sp?). They kill your supply. I was told to take Robitussen DM by my LC but I think that did a lot to kill my supply.
Oh and was going to mention that once Piper gets older, she'll probably stop tugging on it and just sort of play with it after she learns to control her hand movements a little more.
sugarpie honeybun
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fieryred33143
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Thank you MP!
Yeah, my MIL is "hilarious"
Did I ever share the story with you guys about the baby on board sticker?? She was determined to find those big yellow signs that say "Baby on Board" so that we can put it on our NEW cars and let everyone around us know that we had a baby in the car. She finally found it and I''m thinking to myself, I really don''t want this in my car. So what I would do to keep the peace is that when I dropped off Sophia in the morning, I stuck it on the window and FI would put his on when he picked her up in the evening.
Well, one day she called me practically in tears begging me to please take the sign off of the cars because she had heard on the news that a lady that had this sign on her car was followed home and the baby was stolen from the house.
This, ladies, is my MIL.
Viz-Are you asking what I do as in my job? I''m a Sr. Auditor for a large corporation in Miami. Our department is a global department so my work hours depend a lot on the hours of the other offices I may be working with at the time. I like Mexico, they''re only an hour behind. And I like Europe because they all leave the office well before we do. But I do not like Singapore. Singapore sets up 8pm conference calls because it''s 9am there
. And don''t worry, most of the time I am miserable and like that I have company
As for salary ranges, I figure that for us to live comfortably as is we would need probably just $90k annually. Maybe $100-$120k so that we can do all the things we like to do: spontaneous trips, shopping, host parties, etc. My salary is way closer to $90k than FI''s. Combined it''s above that but $90k sounds about right for us. We could probably even do less if we gave up a car and bought a cheaper/no payment second car.
Yeah, my MIL is "hilarious"
Did I ever share the story with you guys about the baby on board sticker?? She was determined to find those big yellow signs that say "Baby on Board" so that we can put it on our NEW cars and let everyone around us know that we had a baby in the car. She finally found it and I''m thinking to myself, I really don''t want this in my car. So what I would do to keep the peace is that when I dropped off Sophia in the morning, I stuck it on the window and FI would put his on when he picked her up in the evening.
Well, one day she called me practically in tears begging me to please take the sign off of the cars because she had heard on the news that a lady that had this sign on her car was followed home and the baby was stolen from the house.
This, ladies, is my MIL.
Viz-Are you asking what I do as in my job? I''m a Sr. Auditor for a large corporation in Miami. Our department is a global department so my work hours depend a lot on the hours of the other offices I may be working with at the time. I like Mexico, they''re only an hour behind. And I like Europe because they all leave the office well before we do. But I do not like Singapore. Singapore sets up 8pm conference calls because it''s 9am there
As for salary ranges, I figure that for us to live comfortably as is we would need probably just $90k annually. Maybe $100-$120k so that we can do all the things we like to do: spontaneous trips, shopping, host parties, etc. My salary is way closer to $90k than FI''s. Combined it''s above that but $90k sounds about right for us. We could probably even do less if we gave up a car and bought a cheaper/no payment second car.
steph72276
Ideal_Rock
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- Mar 16, 2005
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- 4,212
Hey, girls. Just got back from our 2 week appt. Little Evan has grown a full inch and gained a full pound since his last visit and is now 6lbs, 10 oz! Woohoo! She said I can lessen the formula and just nurse more often to get my supply back up. I am so happy that he is doing so well. Hope you all are having a great day.
Fiery, Sophia is just too cute. I bet you have a hard time saying no to that face!
RPS, thanks but I am still kind of in the same boat too. These are the only jeans that semi fit. So I have that and my velour tracksuit that fit and that's it! I am holding off for a while though to see if I lose some more soon and fit back into everything.
Tacori, thanks for the heads up on the crib recall.
Hi, Sunkist, Ebree, Mustang Girl, Amber and Charger
viz, sorry about the blowout with DH
Mara, thanks for the tips on the nursing bras...I am going to check them out tomorrow.
SH, I wouldn't worry about it too much at this stage...probably just using it for self soothing.
PG, sorry about it being hard returning to work...hope it gets easier for you.
Anchor, sorry about the fight with your DH
Sabine, very cute pic!
Mela, we are in FL too...what's up with this cold weather???
ETA: Issues with DH....my husband and I went through similar frustrations and arguments when Andrew was born 5 years ago. I really think husbands have a hard time going from having all your attention to sharing with a child that requires SO much attention at the beginning. That coupled with being exhausted and not much energy for intimacy can make for stressful times for you both.
I have found my husband to be 150% better this time around. Maybe it's because he knew what to expect, I'm not sure but he has taken the reigns and will jump right in if E is crying and change his diaper and plays with him while I take a nap. It for sure wasn't this way with Andrew, but it DID get much better after a while when everyone was adjusted and the baby didn't need quite as much attention around the clock so we could spend some quality time together after he got off of work. Hugs to you all going through a stressful time...just know it does get better!
Fiery, Sophia is just too cute. I bet you have a hard time saying no to that face!
RPS, thanks but I am still kind of in the same boat too. These are the only jeans that semi fit. So I have that and my velour tracksuit that fit and that's it! I am holding off for a while though to see if I lose some more soon and fit back into everything.
Tacori, thanks for the heads up on the crib recall.
Hi, Sunkist, Ebree, Mustang Girl, Amber and Charger
viz, sorry about the blowout with DH
Mara, thanks for the tips on the nursing bras...I am going to check them out tomorrow.
SH, I wouldn't worry about it too much at this stage...probably just using it for self soothing.
PG, sorry about it being hard returning to work...hope it gets easier for you.
Anchor, sorry about the fight with your DH
Sabine, very cute pic!
Mela, we are in FL too...what's up with this cold weather???
ETA: Issues with DH....my husband and I went through similar frustrations and arguments when Andrew was born 5 years ago. I really think husbands have a hard time going from having all your attention to sharing with a child that requires SO much attention at the beginning. That coupled with being exhausted and not much energy for intimacy can make for stressful times for you both.
I have found my husband to be 150% better this time around. Maybe it's because he knew what to expect, I'm not sure but he has taken the reigns and will jump right in if E is crying and change his diaper and plays with him while I take a nap. It for sure wasn't this way with Andrew, but it DID get much better after a while when everyone was adjusted and the baby didn't need quite as much attention around the clock so we could spend some quality time together after he got off of work. Hugs to you all going through a stressful time...just know it does get better!
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