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PS Mommy Thread-Newborn to 12 months!

puffy i can't believe noah is almost 4 months!! time just flies! i almost wish J didn't like the swaddle but it is crazily effective at night hehe.

steph i am wondering what we'll do when it's hot in the summer, we don't have AC in this house, so i don't want him to be too covered up. we're getting a fan for his room but we'll see, we might need to get a portable AC unit for him. and i am hoping to move to diaper and sleep sack in the summer, maybe short sleeve T. but he gets SO hot!! his head sweats little areas onto the sheet hehee.

lysser thanks for the plug re: the woombie. it looks kinda fun and i'm hoping we can get J in one maybe before totally deswaddling. btw C is soooo cute, those EYES!!

tao thanks for the tip on the halo, we might move try it next if MB does not work.

re: swaddling...thanks for the developmental and safety info NB. i def am paranoid about J's motility, esp since he is already a crib traveler. we use the positioner but yeah around the time he is able to roll i def will want extra peace of mind. and yep fiery he is a rebel, watching him in the monitor is hilarious, he is just so stubborn and i guess...fixated on what he wants to achieve, hehe.

when he does stuff like that Greg is like 'are you really surprised, he's your son..' hahaha. i apparently was quite the energetic, crazy terror when little. so many things J does my mom says i did the same thing.
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today he fell asleep with paci and arms out for a nap with no fussing, and slept that way for almost 40 min so i was happy. if we can move more towards that, even once every other day then hopefully when he's ready it won't be too painful to deswaddle entirely. i wouldn't mind trying the woombie for a while though, it seems fun hehee.

oh fiery...what about paying a percentage of your MIL's utility bills under the guise of her watching S so extra bills are being incurred? not sure if it would work but aka 'if you weren't watching her you wouldnt keep the heat as high etc'...or something along those lines? the restaurant polynesian show sounds great, we saw one of those in tahiti!

hawaii is in a week+... i am so excited about some 'us' time with our friends, and freaked out at the same time about leaving J. my mom says 'he'll get lots of LOVE'...i told her that wasn't what i was worried about hehee.

OH and J has already eaten almost 20oz today...he is ravenous. 11 week growth spurt? weird!
 
Thanks for all the feedback on the swaddling guys. He hated having his arms swaddled up, so we started with 1 arm out around week 2 or 3, then for the last month or so he's had both arms out. He is just now starting to wiggle out completely like Mara's J is doing, so I was worried too about SIDS. I just put him in a footed sleeper tonight with no blanket, so we'll see how he does. He is such a creature of habit...he starts crying every single night at 7:35 on the dot and is ready for bed, so that's when we've been starting his nightime routine. As soon as he hears his music comes on, he completely calms down and starts closing his eyes. He's been sleeping 10-11 hours in his crib every night for the past few weeks, so I hope it continues without a blanket. Oh and I put a bid in on a Bumbleride on Ebay today. It's a new 2009 model from an authorized online retailer, they are just trying to get rid of the 09 models I guess. I was telling Adam all about the features of the shock system, real air tires, etc and then he asked me sarcastically if it needs an oil change every 3k miles
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. Hopefully I will get it, if not I will pay a little bit more for another one I saw. Hope everyone is having a good night, I am off to drink a glass of wine and watch Dancing with the Stars!
 
lol steph i wish J was a creature of habit and got calm when he knew it was bedtime. instead he is like ''oh crap the dark room again, nooooo'' and starts doing baby crunches in his swaddle. hehee.

so tonite he went down pretty quickly, we''ll see if he is still in the MB at 3am. he also ate 27 ounces today, a new record, wow. Greg has started calling him Bruiser.

hope you get the Bumble steph... ours is a 2009 model as well. the differences between the 09 and 10 from what i recall were pretty minor so i figured why bother with a 10.
 
littlelysser - Calvin is
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!! His eyes are so big and bright! Love the photos!

steph - I live in the Caribbean, but we use a footed sleeper as well at bedtime.

Mara - I don''t know much about swaddling, but I do remember reading too that it may be best to wean from it when baby is a bit older and more mobile, like around 3-4 months, for the same reasons November mentioned. Hope you figure out a solution that works well for you and J.
 
Two quick questions - just curious and wanted to get some feedback:

1) What time is your baby's bedtime? (i.e the time that you try to put them down to sleep) I'm trying to decide between 6:30 and 7:30.

2) Anyone having sexytime?
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Anybody bfeeding and not using any kind of contraception right now?

DH and I had the odd 'sexytime' on the weekend (after a couple weeks abstinence), and it occured to me that at almost 5 months postpartum, I should start thinking about contraception. My confession is, though, that I don't mind getting pregnant again right now! I mean...the timing wouldn't be IDEAL.....but I would still be very excited!! I hugely doubt it'll happen though, since we have sex pretty infrequently right now and I read online that the first post-partum period is usually annovulatory, anyway.
 
hi ladies -
thanks for the feedback re: the hand flapping. and really, c doesn''t have ANY other symptoms.. has great eye contact, loves to be held, doesn''t get fixated on one thing... so i keep telling DH he''s talking crazy talk. now, i need to convince myself. i hate that DH is always looking for something to be ''wrong'' with c - i think it''s because we''ve already dealt w/ so much that it seems inevitable - but now i have this little voice in the back of my head saying ''well, it couuuuulllddd be'' - blah!

yeah, so c has croup. which gets worse at night!! lucky me
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. basically it was a cold that turned into a respiratory infection and now when he works himself up at night it takes almost an hour to calm him down. and he gets so scared when he starts coughing and barking like a seal.
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sad. last night it took me 2 solid hours to get him to go to sleep. the dude just seemed sooo uncomfortable. and there is nothing you can do b/c it''s a virus, except let it run its course. cold air helps - so i stuck him in front of the freezer for 10 mins yesterday, and then we sat in the bathroom for 15 with the hot water running before bed. who knows, he probably has another ear infection to boot. will i ever get a break?? (don''t answer that). all of this sickness is making what liiiiiittttttlllleee progress we made with sleeping go right down the tubes! he''s back to ONLY sleeping when he''s being held.
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i can''t even fathom trying any type of changes to his routine until he''s feeling 100% - but for the love of god, when is that going to be?? when he''s 5????
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OMG
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calvin is just GORGEOUS!!! those eyes!! that skin!! good work
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fiery - re: your MIL can you buy her an amex or visa pre-paid credit card/gift card? OR i do like the idea of putting her name on the account and then giving her a debit card to that account. that way she can ''buy'' things for sophia out of that account?? i.e. food.
when my BIL had ILs watch their little one they would give MIL a gas card for all of the driving she did. i don''t know if you MIL drives sophia around? or a grocery store gift card??

OK, gotta catch up on work from yesterday.. DH is home with c today, who is apparently being a real handful already.. the little man just wants to be held alllll day. newborn was so much easier, stick him in the sling and go... 15 lb baby who wants to touch and put everything in their mouth - not so much.....
 
steph - Since you live in FL I would say footed pj's are fine. We are still doing fleece because it gets cold at nighttime, but you probably could get away with cotton.

littlelysser - Amazing pics!
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sha - 1. We try to start his bedtime routine at around 7:30PM so he's in bed by 8PM. Doesn't always work and growth spurts definitely throw things out of whack, but most days now he is down for the night between 8 and 9, so it's not so bad.
2. It took us 14 weeks PP before we DTD, and I had an IUD put in at 7 weeks PP. Lactational ammenorhea is not a reliable means of contraception, no matter what Google says, so if you're not ready for another pregnancy, you definitely should look into something safer.
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viz - I'm so sorry C is sick again. I really hope you will catch a break soon! Having a sick LO is so hard...
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Sha:

Bedtime: We start his bedtime routine around 7:30 ish.......It normally involves me feeding him some veggie/oatmeal and maybe taking a shower with his daddy--depends on how messy he is. Then we put him in his sleep sack and my husband will feed him some formula (2-4 ounces) and then we put him in his crib by 8:30-9:00. We sometimes put him in his crib still awake and he will fall asleep---but normally he falls asleep while taking his formula.

Sexy Time: We are doing okay (1x a week--sometimes 2x)...I''m sure my husband would want it more--haha...but it still hurts every once in awhile...I''m thinking it''s kind of a mental thing also for me. We are okay if we got pregnant also--though I am on the pill (not that that did any good with Evan..hehe). I think we are going to go off the pill around November...ahhh! So scary to think like that right now!
 
I wonder if we put Piper to bed too late? She''s usually in bed between 8:30 and 9. She starts getting grumpy around 7:45 or so, so we start her bath. She gets bath, lotion, jammies nurse then goes down. Is that too late? She''ll be 5 mos on Saturday.

Sex: ha! I''ve been on the mini pill for 3 months now, and we still haven''t had sex. Probably because the stupid mini pill has made me have my period TWICE A MONTH. Ugh. So annoying (and painful- the cramps feel like my pitocin on epi but epi was fading contractions).
 
What sexy time? hahaha, seriously. Enough said
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Bedtime I really do think most babies want to go to bed early. I read the ideal time is between 6-8pm. A lot of parents try to push bedtime back, hoping that will make the babies sleep longer in the mornings. I have found that it doesn''t matter at what time my boys go to sleep, they always wake up at around the same time. Bedtime is between 7-7:30pm (always closer to 7pm). They sort of decided this bedtime on their own!...and I LOVE IT!


Viz Poor C
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I hope he feels better soon!!!
 
Thanks for your responses so far! Would love to hear more....

Amber - We usually put Dalila to bed between 8:30-9 pm too, but I read on a Sleep Site somewhere that babies at her age should be getting at least 12 hours sleep or so. Newborns a little less. I''ll try to look up the site again. Dalila usually wakes up by 7:30 am - and with night wakings/feedings, I don''t think she might be getting enough sleep in total. When does Amber wake in the mornings?

viz - ugh....so sorry about C''s sickness. It must be so tough for you right now, operating on so little sleep as you are.
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It sucks that all the gains you made over the past two weeks are being erased, too. I hope he gets better soon so things can start getting back to normal. ((HUGS))
 
Date: 4/20/2010 11:32:11 AM
Author: Mandarine
What sexy time? hahaha, seriously. Enough said
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Bedtime I really do think most babies want to go to bed early. I read the ideal time is between 6-8pm. A lot of parents try to push bedtime back, hoping that will make the babies sleep longer in the mornings. I have found that it doesn''t matter at what time my boys go to sleep, they always wake up at around the same time. Bedtime is between 7-7:30pm (always closer to 7pm). They sort of decided this bedtime on their own!...and I LOVE IT!


Viz Poor C
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I hope he feels better soon!!!

An early bedtime gives us moms more ''me'' and ''couple time'' in the evenings too...and maybe even some ''sexytime''??
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Nah... maybe just some good sleep.
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Here''s the info on Baby Sleep Needs (by age) I quoted:

How Much Sleep Does Your Child Need?
 
Sha: Piper usually wakes at 6am, with two night feedings taking about 25 minutes total. I think I''ll try an earlier bedtime this weekend, since we usually try new routines on the weekends. Thanks for the link!
 
I''ve found that forcing a new bedtime doesn''t really work for Evan. He normally wakes up more often.

When Evan was little his bedtime was around 9:30-10:00 p.m. He just naturally started lowering---at one point it was 7:00 and for the past month now it''s around 8:00-8:30. This betime he normally gets up maybe one time a night--and most nights he sleeps through the night.


We started back with sexy time around 6 weeks pp. Can I ask why some of you aren''t doing it yet? Tired? Just not in the mood? Fear?
 
Date: 4/20/2010 12:03:31 PM
Author: taovandel

We started back with sexy time around 6 weeks pp. Can I ask why some of you aren''t doing it yet? Tired? Just not in the mood? Fear?

I wish I knew...

I think it''s mostly due to schedule conflicts!. I know that sounds stupid...but I go to bed before 10pm..DH usually at around 11pm. Then I wake up when the babies wake up, he stays in bed like an hour longer.

Usually he''s a morning person...and I''m not. Prior to babies we would go to bed at the same time, so we would get sexy time then....or on weekend mornings. Now it''s just weird because we''re never awake at the same time in bed.

I know we probably need to make more of an effort, but honestly I don''t feel for it because my self confidence is just not too high yet...so I feel like *HE* should be the ones making the first move.

So who knows. It sucks though...and I know this is important. I''ve told him about it and he''s not concerned, but I think we should be a little concerned. My sister said that it was normal for the first year after babies to be all weird...so I know I''m not the only one out there not back in the game!.
 
I think my self confidence issue is one of the reasons we aren''t doing it as much as we used to.

And when Evan was waking up a few times a night early on (and even when he was four months) I would be doing the math in my head of how much sleep I would get.
 
sexy time oh hell no not yet. but i know i should get over my fear of the gummi bear residual and just do it. the Dr said it would hurt and i'd prob bleed (TMI!) but yeah i have had a pass for a while now. also with the baby it's hard to find the time when he's not with us and we aren't doing something for him (aka cleaning up at night or making the night bottle, cleaning/sterilizing, doing laundry etc). hopefully in hawaii we'll have some romance.
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though i know some friends who told me it took them like 6-9 months. i remember thinking WOW. but now it doesn't seem SO farfetched, esp if your healing was complicated or whatever. also one of my friends said it hurt so badly at first, she CRIED. that surely didn't leave a positive impression on me.

re: bedtime. well J is 11 weeks and he is going down at 8:30-9. we try for 8:30 but it depends on how difficult he is and also our schedule that evening. sometimes if G gets home a little late then stuff ends up getting delayed on when we start. i feel like J wants it to be earlier so i am going to try for 8 soon but i wanted him to solidify crib happiness before changing times. i also have read that kids typically want it to be earlier if you watch for the sleep cues. most of my friends with toddlers put their kids down at 7:30. and yes you do want the 12 hour stretch ideally. it is hard though to do the routine at 6:30 or so to have them down by 7:30 since that is around the time you get home, want to eat etc. so i can see how some parents push off the kids an hour or so so that the parents can actually deal with some stuff first.

viz, jeez im sorry about C...you guys WILL catch a break, i just don't know when! but hang in there.
sha, i agree with whoever said that bf'ing non-ovulation is not reliable. i think we'll use like 12 diff methods of contra because i don't want another kid hehe.
tao, 1-2x a week, your hub is lucky hehehe. and yeah i do the math mentally too so a lot of times my bedtime is earlier than G's because he stays up to read or whatever and i am like ...sleeeep.
amber, from what i've read re: sleeping i think when they start to get cranky is when you should actually put them down, not start the routine. but if P is not having a hard time go down an hour or so later then it's prob up to you on if you want to change it. once J is cranky it's harder to put him down than when he's in his quiet kind of observant state. some days i can tell a few hours earlier that he will have to go down earlier just by his behavior too.
ginger, hope you guys are doing ok and that A is sleeping better!
rps, if you are still out there please update us on how sweet Ben is doing!! and how your trip went!
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so at 4:30am J had one arm out of the MB.
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i blame my swaddling technique though as the arm might not have been secured as properly as it could have. he could not get the other arm out. tonite mom is having no mercy!! but he did go 8 hours. i tried the paci and leaving the arm out but 30 min later he started fussing and saluting us in the monitor. we fed him and he went down again at 5:30 and is just starting to stir now. the one wakeup is not the end of the world, and trust me i know we'll have sleep regression anyway (deswaddling at that time might be best too) but given that i'm going back to work in 4 weeks i'd love the wakeup to be more like 6:30 or 7am when i am up for the day too.

in other news, i don't think i drained my right boob entirely last nite cuz it was hurting me at 5am! but since i am trying to keep my body on the schedule it already has i didnt want to pump at 5 so i just hand expressed a little and am pumping now. but man i hate random engorgement.

re: pumping on vacation, has anyone had to do this? i guess i just pump and dump (and prob should anwyay given the amt of margaritas i plan to consume!) but i'm wondering if the last day when we are coming home i should just pump and save and put in a bag with an ice pack? it will prob be like 8oz so i'd rather not waste it since we'll be home 5 hours later. thoughts? worth it? waste of effort?

also does anyone know if i can take milk that has been in the fridge for 2 days and freeze it before we go for J when we get back, so he'll have something? or is it once you fridge it you can't freeze it? i'll check Dr G(oogle) too.
 
Date: 4/20/2010 9:57:37 AM
Author: Sha
Two quick questions - just curious and wanted to get some feedback:

1) What time is your baby''s bedtime? (i.e the time that you try to put them down to sleep) I''m trying to decide between 6:30 and 7:30.

2) Anyone having sexytime?
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Anybody bfeeding and not using any kind of contraception right now?

DH and I had the odd ''sexytime'' on the weekend (after a couple weeks abstinence), and it occured to me that at almost 5 months postpartum, I should start thinking about contraception. My confession is, though, that I don''t mind getting pregnant again right now! I mean...the timing wouldn''t be IDEAL.....but I would still be very excited!! I hugely doubt it''ll happen though, since we have sex pretty infrequently right now and I read online that the first post-partum period is usually annovulatory, anyway.
1) E doesn''t go to bed until about 9:00 every night. I know that is later than a lot of babies here, but DH and I don''t even get home from work until 6:00ish every night, and we need to have our time with him before he goes to bed. He sometimes goes to bed as early as 8:30, but that is probably the earliest.

2) I haven''t really told anyone IRL this, but I recently went off the pill. We started having sexytime at 5 weeks postpartum, and do it about once a week as well. My DH wants to do it pretty much every day (!), but I am still having major problems down there. Breastfeeding has really done a number on my hormones, and apparently I have like no estrogen right now. I went to the doctor when I was still spotting 5 and half months after E was born, and she said I looked like a menopausal woman down there. She said that breatfeeding has basically killed all my estrogen, and that the mini-pill wasn''t helping. So I decided to go off of it when E turned 6 months. I am not too concerned about getting pregnant, since I still haven''t had a period, breastfeed exclusively, and have PCOS and had to take Clomid to get PG the first time. But if I did get KTFU, I would be fine with it.\

Okay, there is my overshare for the day
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read above post for reason viz is not having sexy time more often
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and when we do, it's never in our room because once my head hits that pillow i am OUT! i swear i could sleep standing up. my one piece of advice for those ladies getting back on the horse (to echo dd) is drink a glass of wine and get yourself some (ahem) product and then just go for it. the first time stunk! but has gotten increasingly better.

i start to put c to sleep between 7 and 7:30. he is always cues that he's tired, and is 'typically' (HA!) asleep by 8.
up at 9:30,
up at 11:30
up at 1:00
up at 2:30
up at 4:00
up at 6:00 .....

sha - that chart about sleep has had me in a serious tizzy - b/c c gets NO WHERE near the 'recommended' amount of sleep the chart says he should. but he's happy, healthy (for the most part) gaining weight etc. so i would say that chart is an average # of hours. with my boy throwing off the curve
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.

mara - for the MB - the instructions say wrap that sucker as tight as you can. c is the worlds biggest wiggle worm - i think we should get j and c together to have an arm and leg flailing showdown ;) and when i 'really' wrapped him up there was NO way he could escape. show j no mercy ;)

fiery - i re-read my post to you and laughed... why was i so fixated on food??? me thinks i must have been hungry - or delirious - ya never can tell.

ETA: so cal - i WISH c would be game to staying up later.. i get home (if i'm lucky) by 6:30 and get a whopping hour with c before he's tired. did you do anything to help keep e up longer??? is there anything you can take that will help your estrogen level?? or does your doc seem to think things will improve after you are finished BF?
 
TMI Tuesday is what we can call today now I guess...hehe....

I''m having "issues" down there also...the first couple of times after the 6week wait was great...I had no issues with pain or anything. Once I went back on bc it''s been terrible for the first few minutes..like ouch worthy. We''ve tried lube and that helps a little bit. I''m actually kinda excited about October and going off the pill maybe I can get back to normal down there.
 
Tao, re: sex. Same as Mandarine. Honestly, I have zero time to do it. The only hours Paul and I are together are: 6am-6:45 when we''re getting ready to go to work (we go together) and literally all that time is getting ready for work or getting Piper ready for work. He comes home at 6, maybe later. That time is spent doing laundry, getting dinner ready and Piper ready for bed up to 8:30/9 when she''s down and the sleep Nazi comes back (me). Also, P was JUST moved out of our room, up to then, no way Jose. Then, I wake up with her twice a night, and we''re both in bed by 10pm (he wakes at 5am) that I''m too exhausted to wake up earlier than that to get some in. On weekends he coaches so he''s up early and I''m trying to recover from a week of interrupted sleep so I''m (again) not waking up earlier. By the time he gets home, it''s just nice to have family time since we have so little of that during the week that I just would rather snuggle. Also,the mini pill is making me bleed. Since I had a c-sec, I don''t think it would be as painful? Still, I should get on it, but pre-baby I was the one with the high libido while he was content doing it once a month (unless TTC), so he''s not too urgy. :)
 
Mara, you need to REALLY tie him up. My guys were as tight as they could be in those miracle blankets. The rest of my family thought it was a bit like torture, but they loved it!. The tighter the better. They hated when they were able to break free!.

God I hate and love those MBs!!!!


ETA: Speaking of TMI...I should have gotten my period Monday (I usually always get it on time). I'm on the pill and had a crazy sort of month because I spotted a lot mid cycle. Well, now there is no period and I swear if I got pregnant from the TWO times we have had "sexy time" I will faint!. Instead of my period I have just a lot of CM...which doesn't make too much sense....but I'm pretty sure I can't be pregnant.
 
viz - E usually started getting tired around 7:30, so that is when we would start his bedtime routine. But since we now give him a bath every night, and it takes like 20 minutes to get his PJs on his wiggle butt, and then we read him a story and then breastfeed, the whole routine takes about an hour anyway. I think DH draws out the bath and story so that he can spend more time with E, but he misses his son, so I am fine with that.

As for the estrogen, there is really nothing I can do about while breastfeeding, because giving me estrogen supplements may dry up my milk. My doc said things should go back to normal once I stop, but she can then give me a supplement to help kick-start things a little.

I am still really undecided for how long I will breatfeed. My original goal was 6 months, but that has passed, and I don''t really know what my new goal should be. I know they recommend a year, but there are a lot of other things that factor into my decision. The crap going on "down there" is not helping, and pumping has become the bain of my existence. So I guess we''ll just wait and see. I have so many reasons to quit, but none strong enough to cancel out what I am providing for my son. Plus, I feel like formula would be a pain. Sometimes I just wish the decision would be made for me.

Man, I am venting a lot today!
 
tao - I guess I could say I held off for several reasons. My DH couldn't wait and wishes we could start doing it on a more regular basis, but I had a 2nd degree tear and the scar was pretty stiff and sensitive, so I was scared that it would hurt like hell. Even though DH still finds me attractive, I'm not very comfortable with my body with those extra 10lbs on my petite 5'1" frame. After 9 months of uncomfortable pregnancy and now the breastfeeding, my sensory defensiveness is back is full force and once Jacob is down I just... don't want anyone to touch me anymore. Not to mention that if I spent a couple of hours trying to put a screaming baby down for the night, I am definitely not in the mood. BFing and sleep deprivation are probably doing a number on my hormones too.

I didn't really want to do it, but I figured I should just get it over with and break the dry spell. I felt uncomfortable and awkward and it was very painful even with a lot of lube, but thankfully my scar feels less stiff now. It's been a week now (so I guess my previous post should read that we waited 15 weeks, not 14) and I'm still spotting from it.

I know it's early for confession Friday and I might get linched for this, but I need to get it off my chest... I often think about switching to FF when Jacob hits the 4-months mark next week just so I can get my body back. I just... I don't even know how to explain it. One simplistic way to explain sensory defensiveness is needing a lot of space, less touch, less noise, less light, and BFing is extremely draining for me. Like I said, I can barely stand having DH touch me anymore, it makes my skin crawl. But I feel guilty about wanting to switch because I feel like it's a selfish reason, and I shouldn't stop doing what's best for my son for myself. I have the opportunity to do it and it's mostly going well despite the occasional bumps, so stopping because I don't enjoy it just seems to me like it's the wrong reason. Am I making any sense? None of this is intended to make FFing moms feel guilty btw, it's strictly about my own situation. Gah. I think I'll go take a nap, it might make me feel better...

ETA: Hahaha, so cal, funny that we posted about the same thing at the same time!
 
so cal, since you passed your goal maybe just keep going? it might be a year before you know it!! some days i think ''i can''t possibly do this another month, nevermind two'' but other days i think i could do it for months more. hehee.

re TMI tuesday... yeah i figure it has to be like a bandaid, just pull it off! and re: menopausal down there--my OB said that is common when BF''ing and to use lots of KY hehee. makes it sound SO fun hehe. oh and Mandarine i have been having a lot of CM too, very weird i thought since i haven''t had AF return yet.

don''t wory ladies, J will not be shown any mercy tonite...i want that 10 hour stretch back. i do admit to feeling a little badly when he is first trussed up, i seriously think, can you BREATHE in there??? Greg actually tied both his arms under him with the MB this morning, a little diff than my friend showed me but he couldn''t get arms out this morning though he did get his leg out and he did manage to travel partially across the crib struggling. hehee.

did any of your LO''s wean themselves off the pacifier once they got bettre at self soothing? J takes it sometimes and sometimes not but the times when he does like it, it seems like he goes in 2-3 day spurts of ''i love it''. and sometimes at night or during a nap, it''s all that will soothe him without having to pick him up, is that normal? 90% of the time if he falls asleep with it will fall out and he doesn''t mind but i don''t want him to have the habit of going to bed with it because i''m afraid that later during sleep regression we''ll have to run in and replace it all night, not interested in that!!
 
Interesting comments. Thanks for the feedback!

Sexy time: I agree that lack of time is definitely a challenge. I try to go sleep early too (like 10:30-11:00 pm) whereas DH stays up until about midnight. In the mornings I get up at 6:30 am, and he sleeps a few more hours - same thing on weekends. So we're not usually awake in bed together either, unless DH comes to bed early with me, or I go to sleep late (after 12 am)- but then I'm watching the clock, thinking, "Oh gosh, I'm goingi to be sooo tired tomorrow! I probably won't get more than 5 hours sleep tonight..! etc"
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, so I'm definitely not thinking about sexytime. The few times we've done it have been during her naps, but then she nearly always wakes up somewhere in-between and starts to cry. Definitey a romance killer.

I've had hardly any interest in sex though, for the last couple weeks, so not doing it that much right now, which is fine with me. DH doesn't seem to mind that much either. I think it's good to do it every so often, though, otherwise you can get stuck into a pattern of not doing it at all, untiil it becomes habit. When we did it last week I felt pretty good after, and more connected to DH. And I felt less guilty that I might've been neglecting him too.

Sorry to hear about the woes with the mini-pill, Amber, tao, and socal girl. I didn't know it could have those effects. I'm thinking of doing fertility charting as some sort of contraception after my period comes. I know I should be using something now too, but not sure what. I don't want to go back on any kind of hormonal bc, and DH doesn't like condoms.

socal girl - sorry to hear about the hormone issue. I hope things get back to normal once you stop bf. Do you supplement at all? I started supplementing with formula when I went back to work, and it really hasn't been as bad as I thought it would be. I find pumping to be really tedious, though. Kudos to you!!

Mandarine - yikes! maybe this was some kind of irregular cycle, with the spotting and all?

Mara - so jealous of your Hawaii trip..
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That should be a nice getaway!

Bedtime - I agree that it's rough to put your LO to sleep shortly after you get home, though. Feels like there's hardly any time spent together. DH gets the short end of that stick as he gets home after 7 pm, usually, and sometimes she's already in bed.

But I think the earlier bedtime is really the better way to go, since it helps ensure that baby gets enough sleep and that the parents have a bit of 'me/couple time', or housework time (sterilizing bottles or whatever), before going to bed, especially since a lot of us have to go to sleep early nowadays.

I think I'll start Dalila's bedtime routine at 6:45 (bath and lotion), and aim to have her in bed by 7:30 pm. That's three solid hours to chill and do whatever before bedtime.

ETA: anchor...awww....
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sorry you're feeling that way. But I get what you're saying. Sometimes I get like that...but more to do with DH talking to me when I feel like I've had enough 'chatter' for the day. I just want everybody to be quiet. I think it's normal to feel like that. We moms extend ourselves so much in so many ways...emotinally, physically etc. And then to have someone else (DH) wanting to 'take' as well.... it can be really draining.
 
Sha - re: your 1st question - Olivia goes to bed between 8-8:30, usually closer to 8. Until 4 months she was going at 9 or 10, but right around 4 months she started exhibiting tired signs earlier, so we followed her cues and moved it back. She wakes once to feed sometime between 12-3, and then goes right back to sleep and is up for the day between 6-7. It''s very obvious to us when she''s sleepy, she rubs her eyes and yawns, so we start the routine as soon as we see those signs.

re: you 2nd question - we still haven''t done it and Olivia is over 5 months old. DH hasn''t really brought it up much, and neither have I. I am pretty insecure about my body right now, and throughout my whole adult life I have had a very low drive when I haven''t felt good about my body. Also, Olivia still sleeps in our room and I think we''d both feel weird doing it with her in the room. We are moving her to her room at 6 months, so hopefully we''ll give it a try then. The other thing is that I haven''t started taking the mini pill because I am afraid it may affect my supply, which is already low. We can just use condoms, but I really don''t want to get pregnant again now for several reasons, the most important of which is that I am losing my job sometime in the near future due to my company''s bankruptcy and I don''t want to be pregnant while looking for a new job/while jobless.

Fiery - I am a day late, but I love that lady bug cake. Are you going to bake it?

Re: what to use after deswaddling - we put Olivia in a sleepsack every night. Right now we have footed pjs underneath and will probably do so until/unless it''s really hot at which point I''ll just put a onesie underneath. I figure that the sleep sack is the equivalent of a blanket or sheet - I use one every night, even if it''s warm. I vary the fabric based on temperature - I used the fleece sleepsacks for winter and am using the light cotton ones now that it''s warmer.
 
Date: 4/20/2010 2:39:59 PM
Author: Mara
so cal, since you passed your goal maybe just keep going? it might be a year before you know it!! some days i think ''i can''t possibly do this another month, nevermind two'' but other days i think i could do it for months more. hehee.


re TMI tuesday... yeah i figure it has to be like a bandaid, just pull it off! and re: menopausal down there--my OB said that is common when BF''ing and to use lots of KY hehee. makes it sound SO fun hehe. oh and Mandarine i have been having a lot of CM too, very weird i thought since i haven''t had AF return yet.


don''t wory ladies, J will not be shown any mercy tonite...i want that 10 hour stretch back. i do admit to feeling a little badly when he is first trussed up, i seriously think, can you BREATHE in there??? Greg actually tied both his arms under him with the MB this morning, a little diff than my friend showed me but he couldn''t get arms out this morning though he did get his leg out and he did manage to travel partially across the crib struggling. hehee.


did any of your LO''s wean themselves off the pacifier once they got bettre at self soothing? J takes it sometimes and sometimes not but the times when he does like it, it seems like he goes in 2-3 day spurts of ''i love it''. and sometimes at night or during a nap, it''s all that will soothe him without having to pick him up, is that normal? 90% of the time if he falls asleep with it will fall out and he doesn''t mind but i don''t want him to have the habit of going to bed with it because i''m afraid that later during sleep regression we''ll have to run in and replace it all night, not interested in that!!

um...blame ignorance of mommyhood here, but is this legal?
 
sensory defensiveness, is that what it''s called? i had no idea there was a name for that feeling. i do know it''s related to hormones. sometimes i am really cuddly feeling and other times i just don''t want to be touched at all. usually if my bb''s are full feeling or sensitive (so like 1/2 the time!) then it''s even worse, and i also feel more crabby and irritable. aka when i start to pump and the letdown is about to happen i swear i could just scream if anyone even tries to talk to me or the baby is crying.

anchor don''t feel bad re: thinking about stopping. i think about it all the time. and J already takes 25% of his food as formula so i know he''d be fine with it, but i do feel guilty when i think about stopping before 4 months. it''s all mental though you know? and i totally agree re: getting your body back. i feel like my body is hanging onto a few extra lbs because of the BF''ing, and it also makes working out aggressively hard because jumping HURTS my bbs so badly sometimes!!! how do people go running?? plus just not having to worry about timing with feeding and pumping and all that.

BF''ing IMO can wreak havoc on you hormonally without you even realizing it. i am jellie of those gals who just can BF easily and love it and don''t feel any diff, i am not like that at all.
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hi mommies...

just wanted to say, re: BFing...is it bad that i LOVED BFing my first and i am counting down the days when i wean noah? i feel bad even saying it but for some weird reason it is true. i loved BFing my first and all that cuddle time cause god knows i don''t get any extra cuddles from him now unless he''s sick. but with noah, i feel like ''didn''t i just nurse you 4-5 hours ago?!'' i don''t know what it is. and it was BFing that initially got me losing the weight but of course the rest came off with exercise. i seriously don''t know if i''ll make it to a year.
 
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