PS Mommy Thread-Newborn to 12 months!

[fieryred33143]

Viz-hope C feels better really soon, like asap!

RE: bedtime-I followed Sophia''s cues for the most part. She would go to bed at 9 and slowly worked her way up to 7:30. Amber-if Piper gets grumpy at 7:45 usually then maybe you can try to do her routine earlier before she gets grumpy? But I don''t think 8/8:30 is late.

Re: sexy time-We DTD starting around 3.5m PP and now about 4 or 5 times a month which is about 3 more times than I have the energy for loL

Re: swaddling-We used swaddleme blankets but we also left one arm out. When she would go to bed, I''d actually hold that arm down until she settled in to bed. Once she was asleep, she would lose control but not enough to wake herself up. When she was finally just over it, it took us 2 nights before we were swaddle free. But this is an area again where I let her lead the way. It actually took longer to break her from the positioner than it did the swaddle.

 

[vizsla]

hahaha fiery - i feel the same way. i just placate DH most times (and he totally knows) - i figure if i fake interest maybe one of these days i''ll *actually* be interested.

i find the whole ''sexy time'' topic so sad. i really really really want to want to want it. it totally bums me out that i don''t, or that i don''t want a cuddle from DH - but will gladly take one from C. i mean, on top of everything else we are handed during the first 6 months of our babies life, we have to plop this on our plate too? between working, sick babies, not enough time to brush my hair, let alone shave my legs or paint my toes and the pressure of that part of my relationship.... yeah, it just makes me sad. i seriously don''t know how women are suppose to ''do it all''. it literally seems impossible some days.
sorry about that debbie downer post.

so cal - i was kinda forced to stop BF and i don''t know if it''s any easier when the decision is out of your hands - i guess it''s a grass is always greener thing. i hear ya on the pumping thing. it is the PITS! i think it''s AWESOME that you have gone 6 months!!!! congrats lady! don''t feel guilty about anything.

DH and i are talking nanny again.... his business is getting busy and he hims and haws every friday about not working - which makes me

because at *least* he has the opportunity to take a day off. and with c being constantly sick. UGH, i don''t know. i LOVE our daycare and they are so good with C and HE loves it there with the other kids.. but i just don''t know if i can do another 3 months of him being sick.

 

[Mara]

Date: 4/20/2010 2:55:23 PM
Author: Hudson_Hawk

um...blame ignorance of mommyhood here, but is this legal?

haha is this like 'mara what is the diff between your belly and your stomach'... you must just love my cryptic word choices, huh HH??!

no worries re ignorance of strange baby-sleeping ways, you will know soon enough

...BUTTTTT i'll fill you in. the miracle blanket comes with two inside arm flaps and you can put them under the baby, or wrap the arm in it then go under the body or use it to leave one arm out etc. G put the straps around his arms and under him which i have seen online but my friend showed me differently (aka not as effectively). it really does look like a baby straightjacket. youtube has great videos.

as for legality, consult Dr. Google and let me know what you find....laws related to swaddling would be unique for sure. and be sure to watch the miracleblanket.com youtube video for additional enlightenment..it'll come in handy before you know it!

 

[anchor31]

so cal - Congrats for making it to 6 months! I want to tell you to do whatever makes you feel best, but then I''d have to take my own advice haha.

Why do you think formula would be difficult? To me it seems like having portions ready in the formula dispenser and water in a few bottles that I can just bring anywhere with me, mix up when he needs it and voilà! just seems so easy compared to BFing. One nursing session takes as much time as a bottle and a bath, and even if I kept pumping 3 times a day while he''s napping to supplement with BM, there is so much fun stuff I could do with J with all that time, and go out without having to worry about feeding times (I do BF in public, but it''s very much a taboo here, so it''s often awkward and difficult to get comfy), etc. And then you just plop the bottles in the dishwasher. AND no supply worries. Sounds like my mind is made up, huh? I guess what''s holding me back is the health and financial aspects, and the guilt. The infamous mom guilt... DH keeps telling me I should do whatever I feel is best (which is probably the best thing to say in that situation, I suppose); I think I''ll call me my mom to talk about this tonight.

mara - If you''re interested in learning more about sensory defensiveness, I highly recommend reading Sharon Heller''s Too Loud, Too Bright, Too Fast, Too Tight: What to Do If You Are Sensory Defensive in an Overstimulating World. "Too loud, too bright, too fast, too tight" is actually a much better way to describe it than needing more space; a sensory defensive person''s nervous system simply goes into overload much more easily, and often each person has their own stimuli they are more sensitive too. Of course, everyone has things that they are more sensitive to, but if it really impacts your everyday life, then you may be sensory defensive. I''ve had this my whole life (in a much milder case than most cases discussed in the book, but still), but only found out about it through this book about 2 years ago. When I read the book, I went through a sort of "hyperawareness" phase where it was much worse, but then I learned coping skills and it got better. And then I got pregnant, with the nausea, vomiting, heartburn, back pain, hip pain, weight gain, baby kicking...

I thought it would get better when the baby would be born, but it just keeps getting worse, mainly (probably) because I spend about 7-8 hours a day nursing and pumping. Maybe I should read the book again before making my decision about stopping BFing!

 

[anchor31]

Date: 4/20/2010 3:56:10 PM
Author: vizsla
hahaha fiery - i feel the same way. i just placate DH most times (and he totally knows) - i figure if i fake interest maybe one of these days i''ll *actually* be interested.

i find the whole ''sexy time'' topic so sad. i really really really want to want to want it. it totally bums me out that i don''t, or that i don''t want a cuddle from DH - but will gladly take one from C. i mean, on top of everything else we are handed during the first 6 months of our babies life, we have to plop this on our plate too? between working, sick babies, not enough time to brush my hair, let alone shave my legs or paint my toes and the pressure of that part of my relationship.... yeah, it just makes me sad. i seriously don''t know how women are suppose to ''do it all''. it literally seems impossible some days.
sorry about that debbie downer post.

Ok, I should definitely get off my butt and stop posting, but I have to ditto this. Ditt-O.

 

[Mandarine]

My sister freaked me out and had me go get a pregnancy test...and it''s negative!!! phewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

I won''t even tell DH I took a test....if he even knows that I was slightly nervous then he will REALLY never touch me again because he''ll be thinking about getting me KU...lol

 

[Hudson_Hawk]

Date: 4/20/2010 4:28:35 PM
Author: Mara

Date: 4/20/2010 2:55:23 PM

Author: Hudson_Hawk


um...blame ignorance of mommyhood here, but is this legal?

haha is this like 'mara what is the diff between your belly and your stomach'... you must just love my cryptic word choices, huh HH??!


no worries re ignorance of strange baby-sleeping ways, you will know soon enough

...BUTTTTT i'll fill you in. the miracle blanket comes with two inside arm flaps and you can put them under the baby, or wrap the arm in it then go under the body or use it to leave one arm out etc. G put the straps around his arms and under him which i have seen online but my friend showed me differently (aka not as effectively). it really does look like a baby straightjacket. youtube has great videos.


as for legality, consult Dr. Google and let me know what you find....laws related to swaddling would be unique for sure. and be sure to watch the miracleblanket.com youtube video for additional enlightenment..it'll come in handy before you know it!

Both totally legit questions! For someone who has no knowledge of the MB or swaddling in general (i.e., ME), the thought of tying a child's arms behind their back to sleep sounds pretty extreme and borderline abusive. Obviously this isn't the case (and I didn't mean to imply that was your intent). Thank you for clarifying.

Did you ever answer the belly vs stomach question? I missed that reply.

 

[Pandora II]

Date: 4/20/2010 9:57:37 AM
Author: Sha
Two quick questions - just curious and wanted to get some feedback:

1) What time is your baby's bedtime? (i.e the time that you try to put them down to sleep) I'm trying to decide between 6:30 and 7:30.

2) Anyone having sexytime?

Anybody bfeeding and not using any kind of contraception right now?

DH and I had the odd 'sexytime' on the weekend (after a couple weeks abstinence), and it occured to me that at almost 5 months postpartum, I should start thinking about contraception. My confession is, though, that I don't mind getting pregnant again right now! I mean...the timing wouldn't be IDEAL.....but I would still be very excited!! I hugely doubt it'll happen though, since we have sex pretty infrequently right now and I read online that the first post-partum period is usually annovulatory, anyway.

1) I try to get her to bed between 7.30pm and 9.30pm. She generally wakes up between 7.30am and 9.30am in the morning and eats 1-2 times during the night but without waking up (the last few weeks have been bad because of tummy ache and she's up every hour or so during the night but still wakes up for the day at the usual time).

2) Since D was born we have DTD once. Being tired, co-sleeping, things not being great down there and having low libido (probably due to a combo of my meds and bf'ing) all combines to make the idea of

seem more

.

However we didn't do an awful lot before TTC - TTC was a marathon, but I got KTFU very fast so didn't last long. Then when I was pg I totally went off the idea plus was sick, exhausted and depressed - we only DTD twice in total. DH is okay with the situation as am I, although we kind of wonder if we should be doing it more often...

BFing - after a difficult start I've found it pretty easy. I had no problems with blocked ducts, engorgement etc - that may be due to demand feeding round the clock. I also haven't pumped since 8 weeks pp. The girls also seem to have gone back to pre-preggo size even though I have no issues with supply. I aim to stop when Daisy decides to wean herself (within reason - I think 5 is about as comfortable as I would be).

I did find it a bit relentless at around 4/5 months and felt a bit like a dairy cow, but now it's fine and so much easier than formula or worrying if she was eating enough solids... as she still feeds the same amount as before I'm very relaxed about how much solid food she does or doesn't eat - it's gradually increasing but there are days when she just isn't interested.

I think I am probably very lucky that Daisy is such an 'efficient' eater, she's nearly always done in 5 minutes - so I can go to Starbucks and by the time I'm done with my hot chocolate, she's done feeding - unless she's wanting to comfort suck which only really happens when she's feeling unwell.

Viz - so sorry that C is still ill - croup is miserable.

 

[Mrs Mitchell]

Date: 4/20/2010 4:43:54 PM
Author: Hudson_Hawk

Date: 4/20/2010 4:28:35 PM
Author: Mara

Date: 4/20/2010 2:55:23 PM

Author: Hudson_Hawk


um...blame ignorance of mommyhood here, but is this legal?

haha is this like ''mara what is the diff between your belly and your stomach''... you must just love my cryptic word choices, huh HH??!


no worries re ignorance of strange baby-sleeping ways, you will know soon enough

...BUTTTTT i''ll fill you in. the miracle blanket comes with two inside arm flaps and you can put them under the baby, or wrap the arm in it then go under the body or use it to leave one arm out etc. G put the straps around his arms and under him which i have seen online but my friend showed me differently (aka not as effectively). it really does look like a baby straightjacket. youtube has great videos.


as for legality, consult Dr. Google and let me know what you find....laws related to swaddling would be unique for sure. and be sure to watch the miracleblanket.com youtube video for additional enlightenment..it''ll come in handy before you know it!

Both totally legit questions! For someone who has no knowledge of the MB or swaddling in general (i.e., ME), the thought of tying a child''s arms behind their back to sleep sounds pretty extreme and borderline abusive. Obviously this isn''t the case (and I didn''t mean to imply that was your intent). Thank you for clarifying.

Did you ever answer the belly vs stomach question? I missed that reply.

LOL!
I had never heard of swaddling and never tried it, but I don''t think it''s illegal. Unless you''re still doing it when your kid hits 15...

 

[taovandel]

I was getting nostalgic today and went through old posts...whatever happened to Nycbkgirl (doing this from memory) She has beautiful twins....I hope she is doing okay...

 

[Hudson_Hawk]

Date: 4/20/2010 4:33:04 PM
Author: anchor31
so cal - Congrats for making it to 6 months! I want to tell you to do whatever makes you feel best, but then I''d have to take my own advice haha.

Why do you think formula would be difficult? To me it seems like having portions ready in the formula dispenser and water in a few bottles that I can just bring anywhere with me, mix up when he needs it and voilà! just seems so easy compared to BFing. One nursing session takes as much time as a bottle and a bath, and even if I kept pumping 3 times a day while he''s napping to supplement with BM, there is so much fun stuff I could do with J with all that time, and go out without having to worry about feeding times (I do BF in public, but it''s very much a taboo here, so it''s often awkward and difficult to get comfy), etc. And then you just plop the bottles in the dishwasher. AND no supply worries. Sounds like my mind is made up, huh? I guess what''s holding me back is the health and financial aspects, and the guilt. The infamous mom guilt... DH keeps telling me I should do whatever I feel is best (which is probably the best thing to say in that situation, I suppose); I think I''ll call me my mom to talk about this tonight.


mara - If you''re interested in learning more about sensory defensiveness, I highly recommend reading Sharon Heller''s Too Loud, Too Bright, Too Fast, Too Tight: What to Do If You Are Sensory Defensive in an Overstimulating World. ''Too loud, too bright, too fast, too tight'' is actually a much better way to describe it than needing more space; a sensory defensive person''s nervous system simply goes into overload much more easily, and often each person has their own stimuli they are more sensitive too. Of course, everyone has things that they are more sensitive to, but if it really impacts your everyday life, then you may be sensory defensive. I''ve had this my whole life (in a much milder case than most cases discussed in the book, but still), but only found out about it through this book about 2 years ago. When I read the book, I went through a sort of ''hyperawareness'' phase where it was much worse, but then I learned coping skills and it got better. And then I got pregnant, with the nausea, vomiting, heartburn, back pain, hip pain, weight gain, baby kicking...

I thought it would get better when the baby would be born, but it just keeps getting worse, mainly (probably) because I spend about 7-8 hours a day nursing and pumping. Maybe I should read the book again before making my decision about stopping BFing!

Anchor, thank you for posting this. I suspect I''ve got a good case of this. I tend to have breakdowns when there''s too much going on around me (i.e., house full of people on a holiday with traffic noise from outside, stress from cooking and heat from the oven combined makes me want to go sit in a closet and rock). I didn''t know there was actually a term for this, I just thought it was a neurotic quirk I had. I''m definitely getting this book because I have to imagine it might get worse when I''m trying to make dinner, feed the animals, settle the baby and everything else that a mom has to juggle at once.

 

[fieryred33143]

RE: the do it all mom

I don''t know what it is about mommyhood that makes me feel like I have to always move. I can''t ever just sit still. I don''t know if its just that I feel like there is no time anymore.

Today I spent 7 hours in the hot FL sun. I''m exhausted and made it home by 3:30. After my shower I started listing all of the things I should do: laundry, dishes, put away some clothes, make dinner. I''ve never been home this early without taking time off so I feel like I should do a bunch of stuff. Then I think well what da flip?!?! I was on a roof sitting on my rear (burned my butt BTW) all freakin day!! I''m tired! So I''m just going to sit here and stare at the wall. But I keep looking towards the door knowing that FI will get here soon with Sophia and I don''t want him to catch me sitting down. Why do I feel so guilty??

 

[Hudson_Hawk]

Date: 4/20/2010 4:52:50 PM
Author: Mrs Mitchell

Date: 4/20/2010 4:43:54 PM

Author: Hudson_Hawk

Date: 4/20/2010 4:28:35 PM

Author: Mara

Date: 4/20/2010 2:55:23 PM


Author: Hudson_Hawk



um...blame ignorance of mommyhood here, but is this legal?

haha is this like ''mara what is the diff between your belly and your stomach''... you must just love my cryptic word choices, huh HH??!



no worries re ignorance of strange baby-sleeping ways, you will know soon enough

...BUTTTTT i''ll fill you in. the miracle blanket comes with two inside arm flaps and you can put them under the baby, or wrap the arm in it then go under the body or use it to leave one arm out etc. G put the straps around his arms and under him which i have seen online but my friend showed me differently (aka not as effectively). it really does look like a baby straightjacket. youtube has great videos.



as for legality, consult Dr. Google and let me know what you find....laws related to swaddling would be unique for sure. and be sure to watch the miracleblanket.com youtube video for additional enlightenment..it''ll come in handy before you know it!

Both totally legit questions! For someone who has no knowledge of the MB or swaddling in general (i.e., ME), the thought of tying a child''s arms behind their back to sleep sounds pretty extreme and borderline abusive. Obviously this isn''t the case (and I didn''t mean to imply that was your intent). Thank you for clarifying.


Did you ever answer the belly vs stomach question? I missed that reply.

LOL!

I had never heard of swaddling and never tried it, but I don''t think it''s illegal. Unless you''re still doing it when your kid hits 15...

Yea it wasn''t the swaddling in general, it was the tying the arms behind the back part. I mean, theoretically you could argue that tying your toddler''s legs together to prevent them from crawling out of the crib is a form of swaddling as long as you use a MB to do it

 

[so cal girl]

It''s good to know that I''m not the only one who is not completely gung-ho about sexytime. I seriously just do it to make DH happy. I know it is something that is important to him, as it was super important to me before. Like viz said, I really WANT to want to do it, I just don''t. Also, viz, I don''t even attempt to "do it all". I am in desperate need of a pedicure and haven''t shaved my legs in two and half weeks (TMI again

).

As for breastfeeding, I should not complain, because it has been pretty easy for me. We never had latch issues, or supply issues. I actually make enough milk for like 3 children. I''ve always got at least 20 extra ounces in the fridge and half the freezer filled with milk. I only have to pump twice a day for 10 minutes each in order to get about 20 ounces. And when he does eat from the boob, he''s super efficient and gets done in less than 15 minutes. Plus, I do like that if I forget a bottle when we got out in public, I''ve always got the boob right there.

All of the reasons I have for quitting are purely selfish. Maybe my body would let go of these last 10 lbs. I could leave the house for more than 4 horus at a time without worrying about having to pump or have my chest explode. I wouldn''t have to take two breaks at work to go sit in the bathroom and pump. I could drink a couple of alcoholic drinks or caffiene without having to worry about it getting to the baby. I could wear a dress again! I could get my estrogen back in check and actually enjoy sexytime!!

So, yeah, all those reason are about me and not about DS. And really, the benefit to him far outweighs all those benefits to me, I guess. I have the feeling that by the time I actually make up my mind about when to quit, it will be a year already anyway!

 

[Mara]

Date: 4/20/2010 4:43:54 PM
Author: Hudson_Hawk

Date: 4/20/2010 4:28:35 PM
Author: Mara

Date: 4/20/2010 2:55:23 PM

Author: Hudson_Hawk


um...blame ignorance of mommyhood here, but is this legal?

haha is this like 'mara what is the diff between your belly and your stomach'... you must just love my cryptic word choices, huh HH??!


no worries re ignorance of strange baby-sleeping ways, you will know soon enough

...BUTTTTT i'll fill you in. the miracle blanket comes with two inside arm flaps and you can put them under the baby, or wrap the arm in it then go under the body or use it to leave one arm out etc. G put the straps around his arms and under him which i have seen online but my friend showed me differently (aka not as effectively). it really does look like a baby straightjacket. youtube has great videos.


as for legality, consult Dr. Google and let me know what you find....laws related to swaddling would be unique for sure. and be sure to watch the miracleblanket.com youtube video for additional enlightenment..it'll come in handy before you know it!

Both totally legit questions! For someone who has no knowledge of the MB or swaddling in general (i.e., ME), the thought of tying a child's arms behind their back to sleep sounds pretty extreme and borderline abusive. Obviously this isn't the case (and I didn't mean to imply that was your intent). Thank you for clarifying.

Did you ever answer the belly vs stomach question? I missed that reply.

Hmmm, well IMO highlighting what I wrote and asking if doing that is legal IS implying that our intent was 'extreme and borderline abusive'.

Are you following me around picking on vocab just for fun? Mommy Brain doesn't allow me to remember if we got along before or not.

BUT for what it is worth...I have seen posts online where it sounds like they do somewhat 'tie' kids arms around their back with a blanket then swaddle them. As you soon shall see, whatever works.

 

[Mandarine]

whatever...sometimes those babies need to be tied down!!!...I'm telling you, you should have seen MILs face when I was putting on the straight jackets! (aka : MBs).

She would always want to put them herself and if I did let her, these two would be out of them within minutes. So yeah, they needed to be tightly wrapped. I didn't have to tie the back, but up until 4 months (or 4.5?) they could not break free from them!.

I also read a lot about whether or not they would cause the babies any "damage" and there wasn't anything out there that made me doubt. Hello? have you seen how the indians and other cultures wrap their babies?. Not only are those babies wrapped up REALLY tight, but they stay like that for a LONG time (sometimes even past a year!).

**

Tao, I was thinking about NYC the other day too! I hope her little ones are doing well!!!

 

[Allison D.]

Date: 4/20/2010 5:11:57 PM
Author: Mandarine
whatever...sometimes those babies need to be tied down!!!...I'm telling you, you should have seen MILs face when I was putting on the straight jackets! (aka : MBs).

LOL!

Seriously, for me, this is similar to crate training a puppy. Those who haven't experienced it themselves may feel it's cruel, etc., but it's actually the opposite. Crating keeps him safe when I can't be with him, as long as it's done properly.

Similarly, I trust that most of the moms on this thread have their kids' best interests at heart. It makes sense to me that swaddling may help to reduce SIDS risk (by diminishing their ability to break free of the swaddle and end up with blanket around the face).

ETA: Hoping people understand that I'm not equating people's kids to puppies, but the concept of doing something in the name of safety.

 

[phoenixgirl]

So Cal and Anchor, just wanted to send moral support whatever you decide. It''s a tough decision for sure.

Mini pill . . . hmmm, maybe that''s affecting me too. DTD is still not all that comfortable or appealing. I still give it a whirl once in a while, but that''s less often now that I''m working/crazed. Or perhaps loss of libido when caring for a young baby is nature''s way of spacing your babies out?

Separation anxiety . . . I think Claire is developing it, and that''s what actually caused her to be sent home from daycare last week. Is 5.5 months (when she developed it; she''s almost 6 now) too young for that? Sometimes she''s fine, but other times she cries when I leave the room (even when she''s with DH) or cries when I show up at daycare but don''t pick her up right away. DH says she watches him when he puts her in the Bumbo at daycare and starts crying when he goes to leave. She also cries a little when she realizes I''m taking her upstairs to put her down for a nap, but she usually falls asleep right away anyway.


She STTN last night (well, almost to the alarm . . . 5:50 a.m.), yay. Her sleep schedule got pushed back 2 hours this past weekend when we had sitters both nights, thank goodness. Please keep it this way, baby! This is all Mommy asks!

 

[vizsla]

at first i thought HH was kidding... ahahahaha, then again - i think everyone is sarcastic.

well, FWIW swaddling is not illegal - and if memory serves me correctly there is some passage or some such in a really old book about a baby in a manger in swaddling clothes - so i think it''s a pretty legit thing to do.

plus, ya gotta think how TIGHT that baby is in your belly - just having their arms at their side has NOTHING on that

 

[AmberWaves]

Date: 4/20/2010 5:17:57 PM
Author: Allison D.

Date: 4/20/2010 5:11:57 PM

Author: Mandarine

whatever...sometimes those babies need to be tied down!!!...I''m telling you, you should have seen MILs face when I was putting on the straight jackets! (aka : MBs).

LOL!


Seriously, for me, this is similar to crate training a puppy. Those who haven''t experienced it themselves may feel it''s cruel, etc., but it''s actually the opposite. Crating keeps him safe when I can''t be with him, as long as it''s done properly.


Similarly, I trust that most of the moms on this thread have their kids'' best interests at heart. It makes sense to me that swaddling may help to reduce SIDS risk (by diminishing their ability to break free of the swaddle and end up with blanket around the face).


ETA: Hoping people understand that I''m not equating people''s kids to puppies, but the concept of doing something in the name of safety.

Allison: I crate trained Woofie, and had a baby without a swaddler. I WISH P would take a swaddler! I mean, she''s all over the place and in the early stages woke herself up. I am 10000% about DOING WHAT YOU FEEL IS BEST FOR YOUR BABY! Heck, since she loves it so much, I''m fixing to breastfeed Piper until her first day of high school, as long as she would start sleeping through the night!

 

[Allison D.]

Date: 4/20/2010 5:27:51 PM
Author: AmberWaves

Date: 4/20/2010 5:17:57 PM
Author: Allison D.

Date: 4/20/2010 5:11:57 PM

Author: Mandarine

whatever...sometimes those babies need to be tied down!!!...I''m telling you, you should have seen MILs face when I was putting on the straight jackets! (aka : MBs).

LOL!


Seriously, for me, this is similar to crate training a puppy. Those who haven''t experienced it themselves may feel it''s cruel, etc., but it''s actually the opposite. Crating keeps him safe when I can''t be with him, as long as it''s done properly.


Similarly, I trust that most of the moms on this thread have their kids'' best interests at heart. It makes sense to me that swaddling may help to reduce SIDS risk (by diminishing their ability to break free of the swaddle and end up with blanket around the face).


ETA: Hoping people understand that I''m not equating people''s kids to puppies, but the concept of doing something in the name of safety.

Allison: I crate trained Woofie, and had a baby without a swaddler. I WISH P would take a swaddler! I mean, she''s all over the place and in the early stages woke herself up. I am 10000% about DOING WHAT YOU FEEL IS BEST FOR YOUR BABY! Heck, since she loves it so much, I''m fixing to breastfeed Piper until her first day of high school, as long as she would start sleeping through the night!

See? I knew I shoulda just kept my mouth shut, because inevitably, someone is gonna get offended.

I''m not saying that moms who don''t swaddle aren''t caring for their kids as much as moms who are.....or the reverse.

My comment was only to say that I can see where swaddling *may* be an effective safety tool in some situations, and that I have every faith that the women of PS have their kids'' best interests at heart regardless of which methods they choose to get there.

Call me crazy, A, but there has just been SO much divisiveness in this thread lately that I''m just hoping we can all get back to the baseline of believing that our fellow PSers are each doing what they think is best, and hoping we can default to that ''benefit of the doubt'' presumption.

That''s all. There''s no one-size-fits-all, obviously, and sometimes it helps to be reminded of that.

 

[AmberWaves]

God no, I'm not offended! Woofie is the best behaved dog ever! He never would have been should I had chosen otherwise! TOTALLY not offended!

ETA: like I said above: I WISH Piper would have taken to a swaddler as easily as Woofie took to the crate. Seriously! I am bummed it made her angrier than she was to begin with. I also wrote all in caps to agree with you- we all want what's best for our babies, and I'll do whatever the heck gets Piper to sleep, just like Mara and just like Mandy and Fiery and ALL of us mommies do on this thread!

 

[fieryred33143]

Sophia was swaddled tight and then placed in the center of a positioner. She needed to feel snug in order to sleep well.

Heck, even now when I''m putting her to sleep I hold her arms down because otherwise she''s sticking her finger in my nose, smacking my forehead, feeling my teeth, and pointing to something random and "talking" to it which freaks me out.

I think that maybe HH was asking if the "tying" the arms was legal and not about swaddling. I think its confusing to understand those terms when you''ve never used a MB.

My mom thought I was punishing Sophia when I would swaddle her. Then we were visiting her and we went to a party. My mom couldn''t get Sophia to sleep longer than 20mins until I came home and swaddled her. Bam, asleep. Mom is a believer now lol

 

[Allison D.]

Date: 4/20/2010 5:37:16 PM
Author: AmberWaves
God no, I''m not offended! Woofie is the best behaved dog ever! He never would have been should I had chosen otherwise! TOTALLY not offended!

ETA: like I said above: I WISH Piper would have taken to a swaddler as easily as Woofie took to the crate. Seriously! I am bummed it made her angrier than she was to begin with.

Ok, good - because totally none intended!

LOL - my dog was crate trained, too, and he''s the best little dog ever too. He''s nine now and STILL SO attached to his crate that I think he''s going to be a bit displaced if my parents do make good on their recent intent to get a puppy (after several years with no pet).

I can foresee going to visit them once they get a dog, and when we all prepare to go out and my parents crate the puppy, poor Nicky (my dog) will get all bent out of shape because someone else is in ''his'' crate! LOL

 

[Mara]

amber girl you are lucky that P doesn't take a swaddle!! it is more of a pain when they absolutely need it and don't like it at the same time...and when your kid should be named JULDINI hehee.

viz sarcastic...i thought so too but after the second post it was questionable.

mandarine oh my mom feels the same way re the swaddle. 'oh but his arms need to be free!! re 'development'...like anything i think that someone who believes one way or another can argue for their case!

fiery i do the same thing with J re the arms when he is going down for nap...if he is flailing like crazy the light pressure just helps him to calm down and fall asleep a bit. his reflex is better now but it's just relaxing enough to get down to sleep. i totally have thought 'why dont they make little covers you can put over their arms for this purpose' hahhaa.

there's so much talk on here about how people are 'judgey' about parenting, best interests at heart ummm heck yeah!! i didn't carry this kid for 10 months, have constant heartburn, end up with 15 lbs i can't lose AND gummi bear scar tissue in my hooha all so that can torture my kid for fun. really.

i swear.

 

[AmberWaves]

You''re right to equate the crate with the swaddler (or the sleep positioner, or the paci). Woofie will not sleep unless he''s in his crate. Piper will not sleep unless she has her positioner (which sucks because she''s now getting a little to wide for it, poor thing) to lay on. People make fun of me for comparing Woofie to Piper- but when we first got him I had to wake up three times a night to let him out to pee, stop him from playing around and to just be calm enough to go back to sleep in his crate. Then, I had to sit there and SHUSH him while in his crate! Nuts!

 

[sugarpie honeybun]

Regarding swaddling -

From day one, we had a brutal time trying to keep DS swaddled. We tried everything – every swaddle wrap, blanket, you name it - our kid could break free from anything. Out of desperation, I tried using two of the thin Gerber Thermal Receiving Blankets (LINK) and double swaddled him. I would swaddle one blanket by tucking the flap under one side of him, and then swaddled the second blanket tucking the flap on the opposite side. I found that doing the double swaddle while alternating the side of each flap helped to prevent him from breaking loose. If he did break free from the first swaddle, the second swaddle would keep him in place. The blankets are thin, lightweight and stretch easily, which allowed for a very tight swaddle.

We stopped swaddling him cold turkey when he turned 4 months. He was already in the midst of the 4-month-wakeful period, and we figured we might as well get everything out of the way at once. Surprisingly, it had no impact on his night sleeping. We never swaddled him during naps.

 

[swimmer]

Hi Alj!

1. I hope I am having puppies! Hopefully all those ultrasound techs were wrong and I am!

2. Where can I get MBs for teenagers? I have some who clearly have sttn issues and their penchant for self-medication is not helping the self-destructive behaviors, are MBs effective at keeping them from making out in the halls? I''m visualizing sort of a cross between a snuggie and a straightjacket, but with an attractive pattern of course. Possibly sequins.

 

[Allison D.]

Date: 4/20/2010 5:37:16 PM
Author: AmberWaves

I also wrote all in caps to agree with you- we all want what''s best for our babies, and I''ll do whatever the heck gets Piper to sleep, just like Mara and just like Mandy and Fiery and ALL of us mommies do on this thread!

I think that''s what made me respond so quickly on this, Amber. I''m just really disturbed at a recent trend I''ve noticed lately where people who don''t see things similarly somehow feel offended i.e. the whole BF/FF debacle.

One of the things I''ve most enjoyed about following this thread for such a long time now is the support it provides; ladies here are SO lucky to have such a great network, and it''s rare.

There is just no right/wrong way that works for everyone. If one person feels strongly about BF, that doesn''t mean that OTHERS who don''t BF aren''t making the right choices for THEIR children/circumstances, etc. Same with swaddling, CIO, potty training, and I''m sure every other topic under the sun.

This group has had something very rare and precious, and I just hate to see differences in approach somehow get blown into ''judgments or commentaries''. It shouldn''t - people should be able to have differences of approach/opinion without having it be construed as a judgment on one''s parenting ability.

 

[Allison D.]

Date: 4/20/2010 5:48:25 PM
Author: swimmer
Hi Alj!

1. I hope I am having puppies! Hopefully all those ultrasound techs were wrong and I am!

2. Where can I get MBs for teenagers? I have some who clearly have sttn issues and their penchant for self-medication is not helping the self-destructive behaviors, are MBs effective at keeping them from making out in the halls? I''m visualizing sort of a cross between a snuggie and a straightjacket, but with an attractive pattern of course. Possibly sequins.

HI, Swimmer! Gosh, you''re getting SO close! I hope you don''t find out it''s puppies....those multiples can be deadly tiring, you know.

Hope you''re feeling AWESOME and excited about the end of the school year coming fast!

HA - don''t know about the MB for teenagers; I''m still trying to find one to fit the HUB!