The All New Ladies-In-Waiting Club!

[kanne]

MelissaSue
That gown looks lovely on you! Great pictures from jerseycitybride too, esp the enthusiastic "thumbs up" from her new husband. boys are too funny.

jen, as blue mentioned I'm an asscher fan too. My BF spent almost 2 months looking for our stone. It can be an overwhelming process. We were sort of picky about cut and had been spoiled after trying on a royal asscher. What size stone are you looking for? I'm so thrilled for you! I agree that they have just the right amount of sparkle. Have you checked out the Lucida/Lucere cut? This is a cross between a RB and a SE. Also beautiful.

btw blue roses - we have our final ring design meeting on monday!! I know what you mean about the pave/non pave thing. The Daniel K rosebud is a nice compromise. I love that ring. After long thought, we have decided to go for the pave. If I were designing for a 1 - 1.25ct stone I would prob go with simple sidestones like tapered baugettes or bullets. With 2cts or larger (yeah right) I would go for the plain solitaire. Hopefully the pave won't overpower my 1.5. Think a lot depends on the size of the pave stones and the taste of the jeweler.... have you seen the legacy ring from t and co? my new favorite.

I've spent the last day on the couch with a cold

Did anyone see the movie Elf? My BF brought me DVD's and chix soup. He's too good....

Happy New Year ladies and thanks so much to GG who keeps us organized. Kudos to your BF for paying off his debt. IMO the "soon" thing in most cases is related to getting finances in order before taking on the responsibility of a family. That's a good thing, right? On the other hand most girls don't expect complete perfection...just a partnership with a willingness to work through the good and the bad. That "soon" is a lot different from...I'll take out the garbage "soon" or did you know that we will all have fusion powered flying cars "soon".

Maybe we will see some new rings by the weekend. hope so!

-lovey

 

[Croí]

hello ladies all

well, I just printed out the entire last page of posts regarding the "soon" issue. it is good to know I am ''normal'' heheheh

I, right now, don''t know what to think. I''m not sure who wrote about needing a year (minimum) to plan their wedding and I know one to two years (or more!) is not uncommon. I have not been proposed to yet but had already been getting quotes for various bits and pieces for our wedding. May 1st, 2005 is only seventeen weeks from this Sunday !!

It is entirely my own fault but I just ran with it when he said he wanted to get married. There is no ''soon'' about it for me, you want to marry me, then marry me ! We are both older, nothing to be waiting around for (in my opinion), are already living together etc. etc.
It''s not that I''m not romantic because I am - very much so. It''s just that to me, part of the romance is that " I don''t care if I''m wearing a potato sack and it''s lashing rain, I just want to be your hubby/wife" - THAT is romantic !!

So I just started thinking and May 1st jumped out at me (for lots of reasons, lovely time of year, old festival of Bealtaine, reasonably priced trans-Atlantic flights (not officially ''summer season'' yet), Monday holiday weekend at home so everyone''s off on Monday, his birthday is in May, etc. etc. - I didn''t just go with the first date that popped into my head, it was just that May first and he said "okay" but I think that falls into the same category as "soon" in a fella''s book because I think now that he didn''t mean "okay, that sounds good, let''s get married on May 1st" .... I think it was more of an "oh, okay" (while he''s thinking ''wow, that''s really soon but no harm talking about it'').

So right now I am just holding my breath, hoping things work out .........

 

[njc]

Croi - you are too funny! I love that you have picked a date and run with it. I would have to say he is probably pretty okay with everything if he hasnt put up too much resistance. Im sure he doesnt realise just how close May 1 is though! Ive just started all my finding a date stuff and the common date seems to be Aug. 6! 7 full months... its a little scary! But you are the brave one my dear. Planning it all in 4 months in another country! Oh man oh man i hope this new year starts off with a rock on your finger!

 

[appletini]

njc: I''m going to a wedding on Aug 6th...must be a popular weekend, b/c I went to one on that weekend in 2004 also.

Croi: Perhaps you will be a NYE proposal. I''m like you about all of the advance researching, but I''m not brave enough to pick a date and run with it (plus if I had, I''d be out of luck b/c November was a month ago). I have an excel workbook, w/ tons of spreadsheet devoted to various wedding elements. One with potential dates with commentary for conflicts like if my best friends (or his) have other weddings to go to, my work schedule, etc., also have various budgets outlined for whether I have it at my grandma''s house or another venue. Although I need to make one for my dream Mexican wedding in Cabo too. The next time things are slow at work, I''ll make that my next personal project.

Oh well at least the BF and I are going to look at rings tomorrow afternoon, so hopefully "soon" is getting sooner. He goes back to Brazil on Sunday, so I defintiely won''t be crossed off the list in the next month.

 

[yanekie25]

njc, You set a date. Congrats. I am so leary of that. I am definitely thinking not in 2005, just have so much going on and I want to get all the finances right too. 7 months is pretty good time, but I guess you have to get on the dress wagon soon, since they take about 3 - 4 months.

Croi,I wouldn''t know how to plan it all in 4 months either, but you family of talent, sure makes it a lot easier.

 

[Erin]

I''m curious...who here (like me) knows that the ring is in his possession but is simply waiting for the proposal? This is a horrible position to endure in terms of the word soon. He''s had the ring (remounted and all) since April. I told my girlfriend who we''re going out with for NYE to ask my bf before we leave the house if he''s got the ring with him. Because her heart will just be broken if you don''t ask. Is that wrong?

 

[Croí]

hey all !

I''m laughing here - thanks for all the support !! heh. I suppose I have to hold on for a while longer. I am going home on January 20th and think (if he''s planning it at all) it will be before then so I can tell them all at home in person (are you all tired of hearing this great logic ?!!!!? I guess I think if I put it out there enough, then the Universe will hear me - and give him a push !! hehehe)

After that it''s just a matter of sitting down together and redefining what each of us wants. I am sure I mentioned the massive disproportions between my family and his - me, tonnes - him, more or less none ! I am leaning now towards a tiny ceremony of just immediate family - that way, there will be less than fifteen people - and then just an all-out hooley for afterwards that everyone can join in !!

As it is, I''ve done really well and I think our totals will still only be between 75 - 90 people. I''d like even smaller but there''s just no way to whittle it down to less than that (one family of cousins; which I grew up with and live close to; total seventeen on their own !!).

The other consideration will be setting a budget (taking in the stupid lousy exchange rate) and then I''ll go from there.

I am actually quite excited to do loads of it myself. I found this great book on all kinds of lanterns and there are some terrific ones. There is one that I just adore, it''s a big cresent man-in-the-moon (complete with smiling face) and if we can pull off the marquee idea and have a partially outdoor gathering, I''d love to make a couple of those ....... there are also the CUTEST flower lanterns for little girls ....... I''m thinking of a multiple ceremony, beginning with a church blessing (if I can!) and then at sunset a handfasting ... Bealtaine bonfires throwing sparks to the sky !

oohh!

here''s a topic we haven''t covered yet - music ......
do you girls all have a ''song'' ... I have several and I''m not sure how to choose !

Croí, who is still hoping to win the lottery and bring you all over !

 

[icekid]

MS- your dress looks beautiful!

aww JW- too exciting! i am sure i''d be nervous beginning to pick out my e-ring too.. fortunately bf is going to handle all of it

lovey- hope you''re feeling better soon! i absolutely hate being sick... maybe that''s why i am going to be a dr haha

erin- hmm, i''m not sure.. it seems like your bf is already kind of resisting the pressure to propose. i really don''t know what to tell you. i cannot imagine waiting that long KNOWING he has the damn ring already! does he know EXACTLY how you feel? it''s not nice for him to do this to you! i hope you get the ring this weekend...!

Croí- i don''t think you have too much to worry about! he''s well aware that you''re planning everything, and if he wasn''t cool with it, i definitely think he would have said something by now! continue planning... i''m sure it is going to work out soon!

and about pics of my pendant, i will try to post them on saturday or sunday. i am new to photographing such small things! and we left the cord for the digial camera at home, so i don''t have it here at my parents'' house. but i will do my best to get them asap!

 

[Croí]

Erin:

I don''t really know how I feel about this. I can understand how you are getting disillusioned. I only found out that my ex had a ring for me AFTER I left him (after I gave up hope of ever getting one). He had had it for over a year and a half and had been ''waiting for the right time'' .... it was the cruellest blow to hear he had had one when for years I hadn''t even allowed myself to dare HOPE for one.
Personally, and due to that experience and being soured by it, I find that I have no patience for the ''right time''. I really don''t. It''s like I said already, if you want to marry me, you want to marry me - it isn''t better or more true on one day than on another day. It either IS or it''s not.
I know my experience made me bitter about this whole issue but I still stand by my opinion.

I think it is sad if things have got to the point where you have to have a friend prompt him in order to have him ask you. I know men are hopelessly bad at this whole thing but in their hearts they have to know, and if you KNOW, then what''s the bloody problem ???

Where is DG these days - maybe we could get a man''s perspective ?!

Erin: I''m sure he loves you and will ask you SOON (hrrrmph!) but if he doesn''t, you should talk to him because it is simply unfair to let you dangling like this. After a certain point, it''s just not fun anymore. Hope it happens for you tomorrow night.

*hugs&hugs*
C

 

[appletini]

Erin: I can''t believe he''s had it since April...that''s about 7 months too long! He''s probably waiting for the perfect moment to surprise you, so try to not say anything and tell your friend not to say anything either.

Croi: Our song is "Tiny Dancer" by Elton John. There is this band that I love (they played at a friend''s wedding) but they are $4500, so I''m thinking of skipping the Band and the DJ, and instead the BF and all his friends have tons of MP3s and whenever they have parties, just hook the laptop up to speakers. So this way we can have our playlist already picked out and don''t have to worry about that element (plus save lots of money), plus I really hate cheesy DJs at wedding (especially ones that play the chicken dance).

 

[Croí]

Apple!

"Tiny Dancer" is a TERRIFIC song ! hoorah !

I have become really taken with Willie Nelson''s "Valentine" for a ''first dance'' song. It''s so simple, like a rhyme really but it''s lovelylovely.

Our song is "Love Serenade" by The Waifs and/or (equally) "Be Mine" by David Gray but both are boppy so won''t do for a first waltz song. I also love Van Morrison''s "Into the Mystic".

I am thinking the exact same way about music (unless my sister''s bf wants to play for a bit, he''s very good - and another sister''s friend plays concert flute so maybe she may do some traditional melody at the blessing. I''d like that but I can live without it if it doesn''t pan out).

I also love "Orange Sky" for the blessing, because of the chorus ... I would like people to sing along (and since it''ll be mostly Irish folk, that won''t be a problem ! hehehe)

The chorus goes:
" In your love, my salvation lies" and I REALLY like that and feel like that about him. He is my rock and my harbour in a storm ....... this line really strikes a chord with me.

There is ANOTHER song ( I''m a music nut!) called "Never be the Sun" that would also be a great one during the blessing parts .........

oh, decisions !! decisions !!!

 

[appletini]

Croi...I''m glad you mentioned the instruments, b/c you just gave me an idea. My grandma has a piano at her house, so we could hire a piano player for the ceremony portion and cocktail hour (or maybe just the ceremony).

 

[Erin]

For Christmas we bought ourselves a washer and dryer so there were no extra gifts exchanged between us. We were supposed to have each made a CD of songs that remind us of the other and exchange them - then do it again at Valentine''s Day, birthdays, etc. so that by the time the wedding came to fruition we would have a dj set of songs we wanted to hear. Of course the holiday season lended us no time to do such a thing but we''ll get around to it. Saves money on a dj, too.

Thanks for the opinions on my situation. I did let him know how I feel about a month ago. He cried like a baby apologizing for being selfish enough to worry only about when the right time was good for him not thinking about what my mind was left to think because he hadn''t yet. He truly felt awful. He went on to say that there were a few issues (in his life) that he wanted to feel were resolved or at least down the path of resolution - which recently they are on the path. That night he said I won''t sit here and promise that you''ll get it for Christmas or New Year''s, but it hasn''t been fair to make you wait this long as it''s already been - I won''t wait much longer (aka soon, lol)

This is why I have been sort of cool to him since Christmas - it''s almost a defense mechanism for not leading my hopes up for the NYE proposal - but it''s not working. I really will be heartbroken.

 

[Croí]

Apple:
the nicest weddings I''ve been to have had some simple music arrangement. one of my favourites was just two guys, one on low whistle and one on bobhrán, doing a traditional air. It was just lovely.

I think the piano is a GREAT idea. Not many get piano as it''s just too big an instrument to drag around !

Erin:
It''s good you talked to him and I''m sure he will not let you down.

 

[palmbaybabe]

Cross me off the list - I''m ENGAGED!!!!!!!!

I will post pics and the proposal later but real quick he proposed last night at the bowling alley. here are the specs -

.91 carat princess cut, colorG, clarity SI2 (very eye clean), fluorescence - none.

yellow gold, tulip set solitaire.

CONGRATULATIONS to all the newly engaged!!!!!!

 

[appletini]

Erin: He cried that is so sweet! Maybe he will do it on New Year''s Day when all of the bowl games are over. I''m thinking that "soon" means less than a month for you

Just got off the phone with the BF...we actually talked for 30 minutes (5 is a long time for us) about settings, diamonds, and wedding time frames. Very productive, plus we have a date tonight so we can talk about it more. He''s so cute, lately he''s been telling me that he wants to give me a promotion soon (from girlfriend to fiancee). Anyway while we were both on the phone we were both going to diamond websites and keying the same parameters so that we could both be looking at the same ones. I told him that I wanted to be around to pick out the actual diamond, and he said he wanted that too, although I think mainly b/c I have been so research obsessed about it. He said that since his friends are getting married this summer, he''d have to do it before then. So hopefully before June! And as far as the wedding time frame goes, probably March 2006 (by then I''ll be 26 and he''ll be 2, which would be perfect b/c the azaleas will be in bloom at my g-ma''s house. Although I have been wanting to go back to school for a Master degree, so I might have to plan the wedding around spring break for my honey moon (or just wait another year for school). Anyway I''m really excited, even though nothing will happen for awhile, but at least the wheels are starting to turn.

Also here is another setting that I kind of like (more vintage looking) in addition to Kayla17s Ritani. The pic at the top right is it with an asscher, but I want an RB.

 

[appletini]

Congratulations Palmbaybabe. I actually think the bowling alley is very cute...not mention big points for the surprise factor and very memorable. I can''t wait to see the pics!

 

[MelissaSue]

congrats palmbaybabe! can''t wait to see your pics!


Tonite is our 3 year dating anniversary... I''m sure glad I''m not still waiting for that ring!
Okay gotta go get ready!

 

[Croí]

PALMBEACHBABE

hooorah !! hooorah !!! so great !! can''t wait to hear more !

hey, GG, have we reached our total yet ? I guessed seven, and we still have New Year''s to go !

melissasue: congrats on the three years ! well done.
when we first met, I kept ''weekly'' anniversaries (our tenth week etc.) and in November we celebrated our 100th week ! hoorah !!! I had booked to go away but he had to work so I had to cancel but we went out for a yummyscrummy dinner instead and teased each other (in a bold, though only verbal !, fashion) right in the restaurant.
it was a GOOD anniversary !

PBB - I''m still sooooooooooo excited about your news - hoorah hoorah !!

Apple - another reason for my May 1st is I think the cherry blossoms will be blooming then at home, covered in those fabulous dainty pink flowers !

C

 

[goldengirl]

Date: 12/30/2004 5:12:44 AM
Author: lovey

Happy New Year ladies and thanks so much to GG who keeps us organized. Kudos to your BF for paying off his debt. IMO the 'soon' thing in most cases is related to getting finances in order before taking on the responsibility of a family. That's a good thing, right?

I think so... I guess that's why I'm so weirdly calm about the whole thing. A few months back I was really jittery-anxious, always on edge, soooo excited for it to happen (lol) "soon". But I've attained, as we discussed earlier, a sort of zen-like state, and I have this rather mild "Oh, that would be nice" feeling about an engagement, but am not freaking out "OH GOODY PROPOSAL ENGAGEMENT YAY PLAN WEDDING YAY HAVE KIDS YIPPEE!!!" like I was a few months ago.

This is not to say I'm any less excited about moving forward with him, just that I'm not hyper about it happening right now. I think that's good, for us.

We do still have plenty of time, and I'm just enjoying being with him, and working towards our future, for now.

CONGRATS palmbaybabe!!! Can't wait to see those pics you promised!

Croi, we're up to 5.5, but we still have a few days to go!

And apple, that's sooo cute... he wants to give you a promotion, lol!!

 

[SJS1234]

PalmBayBabe -- Congratulations!! Your BF (I mean fiance) is so sweet to do it at the bowling alley -- totally unique, and I''m sure unexpected!! And in front of other people!! I can''t help but wonder if my BF will propose when we are alone, or if he will do it somewhere public. He likes to goof off, and his friends are the same way -- so i wouldn''t be surprised if they are included in the "plan". ANYWAY, if it''s in a public place I hope it''s someplace cool like a bowling alley -- not a quiet restaurant where I''ll feel self conscious about SCREAMING in joy! Does anyone have restaurant engagement stories?? I''d like to hear about your reactions -- and how you handled it....

sigh....I''m so excited for everyone!! My situation is, I''m guessing, a little different from most of yours. I was married once before -- to a guy I dated for 4 years. We were best friends and are still close, but at some point we both just realized that we got married for the wrong reasons -- just because we thought it was the "next step". We learned a lot from that experience, and yeah -- it was so so so hard....but getting divorced was the right thing to do. I met my BF around the time my divorce was "final" final....although I had been separated for over a year, and both my ex and I had been dating others for a few months. It took me about 6 months of dating my honey bunny before I was really ready to "love" (god that sounds so cheesy), but once I was ready, it was like a light came on and I knew that he was the one for me......fo-evah. I''M SO HAPPY......

ok, so the reason for all of this -- well, since it''s not my first wedding, I feel completely lost about how to handle #2. The ceremony will be small -- but what about the dress, etc? I know I''ll be asking for tons of advice from you guys in the future!!!! I know how to do the big wedding -- been there done that -- but the small, second one??? hmmm.. no clue. Any other second timers on here??

 

[SJS1234]

Oh yeah, and DUH -- the question I meant to ask was -- if you''ve been married before what did you do with the rings?

 

[Erin]

Congratulations Palmbaybabe!

 

[JCJD]

Congrats PalmBayBabe!!! Can''t wait to see pics of your tulip setting!!

 

[kasih]

Congrats Palmbaybabe!!!

Looking forward to seeing the pics!

 

[goldengirl]

gingerBcookie
goldengirl
cute330xigrl
1215n
LaurenThePartier
jenwill
palmbaybabe
denverkat
psuheather
twinkletoes
ootthibo
pokerface
blueroses
madarski
VAgal13
allycat0303
aeli
Morticia
icekid
LuvthatSparkle
Kberly
KimberJEB
kit0110
Queenofhearts
Dodger Gurl
honeynut
stacy11101
Erin
Dani
flyerfan
appletini
lovey
LittleOne
Shay
Croi
happysnowbunny
dancinbaby
AMALEEKEL
razza21
Binki
NoonersMom
kasih
blue824
kellypooh24
ammayernyc
SJS1234

So far in the PS pool, we have 5.5 proposals! [persistent, JCJD, Brocksgirl24, yanekie25, tlmd, & palmbaybabe!]

 

[allycat0303]

Palmbaybe!

Congrats on your engagement! Can''t wait to see the ring and hear all of the details.

 

[goldengirl]

So do you ladies have a pretty good idea of what you want for your wedding, or have you not really given it much thought?

Want to talk colors?? Who already has their colors picked out?

Me, me, I do!!

 

[jenwill]

WooHoo for PalmBayBabe! Congratulations, can''t wait to read the whole story!

Lovey and BlueRoses- yep, asscher triplets. I also am going to have a hard time picking out the stone, I tried on a couple of Royal Asschers the other week at Davidson & Licht- soooo beautiful. I am not sure of size, but it will probably be between 1-1.25 carats. I was also debating the pave around the center stone, but decided it might hide the subtleness of the asscher sparkles. So, will go with just 5 shared prong set melee on either side of center. Trying to decide between 2 and 3 pointers, will probably have to rely on whiteflash to help with that choice.

SJS1234- I can''t give you advice on what to do with old rings, but for second wedding dress I think whatever makes you happy is fine. If it will be his first, and he wants the whole big wedding experience, then go for it. If you both want low key, go for that too! The wedding should be about celebrating your love for one another- not about who will think what about whatever dress you wear. Some people will find any reason to judge someone else, but those who truly just care about your happiness will be happy no matter what you do.

 

[honeynut]

MS - oops! I was so sure that was it! Eh, it was close enough for me I guess! They are both just gorgeous, IMO.
Congrats all fiancees

So happy for everyone! GG I feel the same way... MOST of the time. So many people at my office have gotten engaged over the holiday! I saw over five carats of brand new diamonds before I''d even had lunch today. One girl has this awesome 1.5 carat honker and I am dying to ask the specs, but I think that would be rude! So I am tactfully refraining. The curiosity is killing me though!

As for 2nd weddings - my 1st is going to be very small! A teeny little backyard ''do with super-luxe food - cheap and chic. Doing all the decor myself, self-serve buffet and self-serve premium open bar. Friend is hopefully officiating. the whole thing is planned (just have to mail out the deposits!) Closest friends and immediate family only - total guest list, not more than 35. We already have a DATE but no engagement yet! Do I ever feel like a hypocrite. "Honey, we''re getting married on the 14th of May, 2005 - I hired a band, a caterer, and a photographer; I''ve bought 300 votive candles, 5000 mini white lights and 900 yards of tulle! Now - what was that you wanted to ask me?"

If you can wait that long, I will post pics and budget. So far its costing less than 4000$ US. Wheee!!