The Official TTC Thread!

[Laila619]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

YAY for the good HSG, DCGator!! You must be so relieved.

That's a HUGE positive that your tubes are open and functional. Here's to hoping the HSG provides the little extra boost this month! You will probably be slightly crampy the rest of the day. By the second day, I was feeling normal.

 

[CatLuver]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

dcgator, I'm glad your HSG showed no problems. Keeping my fingers crossed that it will have paved the way for you this month.

Steal, those symptoms sound verrrry promising. I will not be surprised in the least to see a BFP from you soon. Are you waiting to test again?

 

[Bella_mezzo]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

DC-So glad it went well and that your tubes are open for business I really hope this is the month for you!!!!!

Steal-thanks for getting my back! I'm in a good place with the stuff buying and am done--d.o.n.e--a. b/c I have everything I am remotely comfortable buying early b. b/c DH will kill me if I get anything else, and c. b/c now we're trying to save so that we can cover a full 3 month maternity leave whenever we need it Also, I listed a bunch of stuff on ebay this week (first time besides my wedding dress that I sold things on ebay) and the total of the auctions is already greater than the cost of the mei tai, so I don't feel so bad

On my end, I got a pretty positive OPK on CD 17, but I think 15 and 16 might have been positive too--very hard to tell (stupid Wondfo strips...) I just now, like this second, remembered that I have smiley face ones in the closet-DOH! I should have just busted those out! I took too long of a POAS hiatus, I forgot how the work the system I'm now CD 22. FF has me at 4 DPO, but I think it might be 5 or 6...if evil witchy AF (who was probably totally shoplifting deoderant with Steal's AF) hasn't shown up by September 25th then I will POAS.

HR is pretty much non-existent at my job, despite it being a $30 million/year non-profit, but I had a random conversation last week with the Dir of Finance about possibly adding my DH on to my insurance (not bloody likely since it's free for me but $750/MONTH if I want to add him on to the policy) and so I asked about what if we had kids (again $1100/month for a family policy. DH is no longer in the running for SAHD, we need his health insurance--$250/month for a family!) That lead into a convo about beenfits and I found out that they just give you the bare minimum for FMLA--with 0 paid leave. you can take vacation, but they discourage you from using sick time b/c they think you'll use it up on Dr's appts pre delivery (he$% no! I will be on my laptop at the Drs if I need to be!). But they said something about being able to work on a time-sheet status from home, I think even while collecting disability....? I'm going to have to figure out the legalities and issues with that. My dream would be 6 weeks at home (maybe checking email for a few hours a week) and then 6 weeks working half time from home with as much disability as I can get Then I would want to try to work 2 days a week from home when I went back to work...who knows, my job is not very keen on WAH arrangements...I might need to just find a different job.

but...first I have to get a freaking BFP! Until then I'll go re-arrange my diaper collection (MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA )

 

[Po10472]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

Morning ladies

DC - great news to hear that you're 'cleared for takeoff!'. Fingers crossed the remaining tests come up trumps and you get that elusive bfp for Christmas. In fact, it would be amazing if we were all pg by the end of the year.

Bella - I found your post really interesting regards maternity leave, or lack of in your workplace. I'm an HR Adviser here in the UK and all women are entitled to take up to 52 weeks maternity leave. 39 weeks out of the 52 are paid for, at varying levels depending on whether you work or not and how long you've been working in one job. For example; as I have more than a years service in my organisation, I would be entitled to the first 6 weeks at 90% of my current earnings, then 12 weeks at 50% of my current earnings plus £124 per week (from the Govt) then the remaining 21 weeks are paid at £124 per week, the last 13 weeks are nil pay. Also, the first 2 weeks are complusory maternity leave so legally you cannot return to work even if you wanted to until 2 weeks after you've given birth.

The European Union were looking to increase the paid element of maternity leave to full pay for 18 weeks however in light of the recent economic recession, they decided to leave it for now, as it would cripple small businesses who already struggle with maternity leave in their organisations. Business claim back the paid element of £124 from the government, so in comparison, our maternity leave is amazing. That being said, there are plenty that moan about it and about the NHS where they get 'free' maternity care.

On that note, I best get ready for work as the traffic is going to be crazy today as the Pope is visiting Scotland and it's causing major chaos with security and road closures all over the cities.

Have a good day!

Po
x

 

[modernsparkler]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

DC: : SO happy for you that the HSG went well and things are open for business! Hoping this will be your month for sure!

PO: you make me want to move across the pond! It is so great that the UK values maternity leave so much! That is amazing!

Bella: Sorry your leave sounds so complicated and its frustrating not to have anyone from HR to work with. Maybe you can start putting some feelers about with regards to working from home and see how it goes over?

I thought what my residency offered was a good deal. It is pretty much expected that you take 12 weeks off. The first 6 are usually a combination of sick and vacation time fully paid. The next 6 could be at disability pay, however it seems that they just keep paying you at your regular rate which would be nice! The other great thing in my opinion is that for an additional 4 weeks after the 12, you are offered an elective to do a project related to mom/baby issues and then you work in clinic 2 times/week. Good way to ease back I guess. However, I think I would take the 52 weeks if I could!!!

 

[kennedy]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

Happy Hump Day Ladies,


Kennedy - Welcome to the TTC hood We are happy to have you here! As for the breast tenderness question, my girls will usually get bigger and the nips will get tender around O. It's not to say that it doesn't happen after O, but more as a precursor to O. Those two symptoms usually fade away after O. Regarding the CM, were you on BC pills recently. Sometimes, coming off the pill can affect CM. I hope that sheds some more light on your questions, however, should you need more info, please ask!


*****
AFM, the HCG went well. It wasn't horrible, but wasn't pleasant either. The catheder kept slipping out for some reason, so they had to try a couple times to get the pics they wanted. But, besides some cramping (similar to severe AF cramping), it wasn't horrible. And there were no side effects, so once they were done, I hopped up and got on with my day. There has been some residual cramping, but the Tylenol seems to keep it at bay. Otherwise, everything looked good, so that's a releif. Now, DH and I have some BW to do (mine on Fri) and then he has his SA next week, and we will have done our work ups. After that, it's just a waiting game till Oct 1st to see how we did. Hopefully though, the HSG will give us a little extra boost and we won't even have to bother with all the other stuff. Time will tell though. My main concern right now is just to make sure the dye works its way out so I can get on to the BD'ing marathon. I am just praying that I don't O till CD13 again, so that I will be able to catch some good days. Wish us luck!

Thank you so much for your reply! I am kind of shocked how easy it is to become obsessed by this whole TTC business! All the waiting is a bit torturous and I feel very grateful not to have had to go through it with my first pregnancy!

I am glad to hear that breast tenderness is not exclusively a sign that ovulation has passed -- at least not for everyone. If that was the case, then we for sure missed our window.

I wish you a lot of luck on TTC!!! I can really appreciate now in a whole new way how stressful it can be. I'll be keeping my fingers crossed for you!!

 

[Keepingthefaith21]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

Stopping by to say that I got a positive OPK on Tuesday which surprised me. That puts me at positive OPK on CD11 along with EWCM on CD11 and CD12. It seems too early in my cycle be Oing but I am keeping an open mind regarding these things as my cycle may change as a result of everything that has happened since April. I also had spotting with this O - my OB said it is not that uncommon to have spotting during O especially because I have recently returned to my intense gym workout regiment. DH and I missed a CD12 BD session because I had saddle sores from a lot of biking I have been doing. Anyone who has ever had them will tell you they hurt like heck and BDing was so incredibly painful on my skin I cried through most of the CD11 session. I will never make that mistake again! Between missing an important BD day, having spotting during O which has never happened and seeing my O at a point in my cycle that seems a bit too soon, I'm not feeling confident about this month at all. But, that's okay. Whatever will be will be. I am just happy to be back in the game!

 

[noelwr]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

Po - that's really interesting. in Holland we get 16 weeks full-time paid maternity leave, but my company has standardised it globally for all our offices to 18. then we get 6 months unpaid parental leave (can be taken up by both mom and dad and doesn't have to be at the same time), which you can either take in one go directly after the maternity leave or split it up, like working part time, some time before the child turns 8. so I'll be returning to work 4 days a week for 30 months, and then back to full-time. that's a long time to earn only 80% of my salary, but I'm sure that day alone with my daughter every week will be totally worth it.

 

[Dreamer_D]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

In Canada, if you have a job like I do with a gov't agency or other large company, I get 52 weeks maternity leave, the first 8 months at 90% of my salary, then an additional 2 months at 80%, then the final two months at only the gov't portion which is around $1300 per month.

 

[noelwr]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

wow Dreamer... so that basically means you're on maternity leave for almost a year.

 

[Loves Vintage]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

Dreamer - That's amazing. So, even large private companies offer the same benefit? Does the employer then hire a temporary employee for the year? Curious how that works.

 

[Steel]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

Dcgator: How are you feeling now; are you back to rights following the testing? I hope so. I'm glad to hear that your in great working order; I didn't doubt it. Well done too, to your DH for getting his SA done. I hope his results will come back great too. Is work still crazy?

Catluver: Thanks honey. I'd love to tell you "Oh yes Siree, I'm waiting till I'm at least 2 days late; I'm not one to waste tests". But that would be a porker. I've been testing like nut since 4/6 DPO - the day I got the spotting. Surprise surprise each had been a negative. Who'd have guessed?

Bella: Glad my comments were taken in the manner I meant. So have you colour-coded the nappies yet . The good news is that if AF was shoplifting hopefully she will be locked up! She needs a 10 month vacation! Happy 2WW. I have spend a lot of my time on twoweekwait dot com. Just saying . The best of best luck for you.

Po: How did I not know that you were across the way? Hope the traffic was not nuts. I bet it was though.

Modern:

Kennedy: I am sorry. I missed your post earlier. I hope you did not miss your O date. I have not 'bumped' into you before but you're very welcome .

KTF: I'm happy your body is getting into this cycle. It seems nice that your OB is answering your questions, it must be reassuring to have somebody who can give you answers. But YIKES on the sore bum! Don't be too hard on that body.

Dreamer, Noel, LV:


AFM:

Do dum.....
My name is Steal and I made my poor husband look at a negative pee stick to see if he could see the non-existant shadow that really wasn't there, but I hoped it was.
"welcome Steal"
I feel very bad about it.
So I am so sad about all of this. I think I am pregnant. But the tests think I am not and my money is going on the tests. My current 'symptoms' (haha I spit the word which only exists in my life at the moment to taunt me) are the crappy crappy crappy sleep, both yellow watery cervical fluid and creamy sticky white; within hours of each other, cramping, high cervix and negative pee sticks - oh, actually strike that last one. Also I'm going nuts; is that a common symptom?
I don't 'know' for sure what DPO I am because of the whole not having OPK's. But my money is DPO 11 because I got a positive on Monday 6th which was CD 13 but also the first day I tested. CD 14 and onwards were pretty much negative. But honestly I wasn't paying the best attention. But that said I could have O'd much earlier. Who knows? Anyhoo based on the estimated O of CD 13; that puts me at DPO 11 today with AF due on Monday. It also blows a raspberry in my 'perfect' 28 day cycles which did not expect to O until CD 15. I want so much for this to be our month I feel sick. I said to DH that if it isn't I want to give up; I feel so bad hoping. It is just like my epic job hunt. Just because you do everything you are supposed to does not mean it will happen for you and that feels so cruel.

The best of luck to all here 2WW'ing or chasing the egg.

 

[dragonfly411]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

Just dropping in to say DC - that is great to hear!


Steal - It ain't over till the fat lady sings.

 

[brightlight]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

Steal, sending you lots of hugs! I don't want to give you false hope, but I ovulated two days after my positive OPK. So, you could be 9 dpo. I think on average, women ovulate 36 hours after a positive. Even if you are 11 dpo, if the embryo implanted yesterday, it would still be too early to get a BFP.

It's so hard emotionally. (I'm just going to ramble about myself for a little bit b/c I haven't posted in a couple months, but maybe it will help you too.) I don't know how old you are, but I looked up the stats for my age group (30-34) and the pregnancy rate after one year is actually a little over 60%. So, there's almost an equal probability that I won't get pregnant within a year. At first, that made me sad, but then it made me feel better knowing that it was normal for me to not be pregnant yet. It relieved me of all my "What if something's wrong with me?" thoughts. It's helped me deal with the fact that I'm not pregnant yet, but I still have 2-3 days at the end of every cycle where I get really emotional and depressed. I feel worse those few days before AF comes than when she actually does come. I feel hopeful again once my period starts. Now, I'm focusing on enjoying the extra freedom I have before I get pregnant by doing things that would be harder to do once we have a baby like traveling. Don't get me wrong. I'm still doing everything I can to sway the odds in my favor!

Anyway, if AF hasn't come yet, there's still a chance you're preggo! I'll keep my fingers crossed for you!

 

[Dreamer_D]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

Dreamer - That's amazing. So, even large private companies offer the same benefit? Does the employer then hire a temporary employee for the year? Curious how that works.

Legally, any employee working for any company in Canada gets 52 weeks paid leave from their job with benefits paid by the gov't (at 40% of your salary OR ~$425 per week, whichever is greater), and the employer *must* have an equivalent job available for them when they return from leave, not necessarily the exact same position, but the same pay rate. This applies to convenience store clerks, assembly line workers, and CEOs alike (though most women in that level of their career are not really needing mat leave anymore ). Some people cannot live on the 40% of their salary, though, and won't take the whole leave. The gov't benefits are paid by the same branch of the social services that pays us benefits if we are unemployed, and we pay a portion of our income for this employment insurance. It is not a lot of money each month (varies by salary) and it is mandatory for all employees.

If you work for a large company that offers additional benefits, like I do, then you get a top up to your salary like I described on top of the gov't benefits. So I will get 90% for a large portion of my next leave.

Companies hire one-year contract positions to fill in for the vast majority of cases. In my case, a sessional instructor will take over my teaching. I will likely still be involved in my students' research, though technically I could find someone else to do that too, for them.

It is a challenge for people working for smaller companies or in positions where it is hard to find a replacement. One of my friends left for mat leave and came back to find her job had basically disappeared because the company reorganized in her absence to cover her position. She still had a job to come back to though! Just a different one she did not like as much. She ended up going elsewhere. But she had the luxory of looking for a job while employed.

The vast majority of women in Canada take a 10 - 12 month maternity leave. Men can also take parental leave and it is getting more and more common for women to take the first 6-8 months then men to take the last 2-4 months (the gov't subsidy pays for one parent at home with kiddo at a time, but does not care which parent). Depending on the top ups offered by their companies, or their respective salaries, it can make more sense for women to go back to work sooner and Dad to stay home instead.

We are very fortunate here. These policies were a big part of the reason I did not want to look for work in the US, honestly.

 

[Dreamer_D]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

DCG Glas to hear the tubes are clear! woo hoo!

Steal Still too early yet, hon. Most women do not get a reliable test until 14 DPO, many much later (a few PSers did not get positives until 18DOP!)

Brightlight Where did you read that statistic? I have never seen one like that and would like to read the source material...

 

[CDNinNYC]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

Hey Ladies!

De-lurking to let my inner HR Associate out:

In Canada, except Quebec, pregnant women are entitled to 55% of their wages with a maximum of $447 per week(15 weeks maternity + 35 weeks parental leave that can be shared with the father. I don't work in HR anymore, but was told recently parental leave has been extended to grandparents as well.)

While the maximum time covered by Employment Insurance is 52 weeks, you are only covered/paid 50 weeks (15 maternal + 35 paternal). The two weeks unpaid is treated like a deductible.

To receive this benefit, the pregnant woman is required to have worked 600 hours in the last year or since her last claim.

If you adopt, you would only be entitled to the 35 week parental portion of the benefit.

Of course, this benefit is the minimum available provided by the federal government. Many companies offer top-ups to this plan. Vacation time, in many cases, is also saved up and attached to the beginning or end of the leave, thereby extending the time off.

Where I worked, we had some employees that were entitled to 4+ vacation time. Because they accrue vacation time while on their maternity/paternity leave, they sometimes end up with 8+ extra weeks of full-time pay they can tag on to their leave. Not bad...

Hope you're all doing well!

Re-lurking...

 

[Dreamer_D]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

CDNinNYC Well I got it close I was going on memory, not in HR myself.

 

[Po10472]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

Morning

Coincidentally, after I posted about the mat leave provisions, the government announced today that they are going to vote next month on whether or not they're going to increase the maternity pay to 20 weeks full pay for all mothers/adopters with occupational maternity pay and statutory maternity pay on top of that. They're looking at this because the UK offer less than our European counterparts, like Hollands provisions. So it may all change in the next few months. Also legislation was introduced in April althought the new govt may scrap it, that enables fathers/partners to take the second 6 months of maternity leave off once the mother has returned to work. They may also be eligible for a paid element of leave if the mother has returned before 6 months. Currently fathers/partners are entitled to 2 weeks paid paternity leave.

Women have protected rights when returning to work, if you return within 6 months then you legally have the right to return to the exact same job, if you return after 6 months, you will be entitled to the same conditions and pay but not necessarily the same job and you cannot be made redundant on the grounds of pregnancy. Although we all know that isn't necessarily the case.

Parental leave of 13 weeks (unpaid) is also available to parents of children under the age of 5, so essentially you could take 52 weeks maternity leave followed by 13 weeks parental leave giving you a total of 65 weeks off to look after your baby. You'd be skint tho, as 6 months would be at nil pay.

 

[Bella_mezzo]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

I need to move to another country for the mat benefits!!!! I knew they were better, but not how much better! In the US if your company has more than 50 employees and you've worked there for more than 1 year than your job is protected for 12 weeks and you can apply for disability (which is a minimum payment from the government) for part of that time.

 

[Steel]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!



So I now have a new 19 day cycle.

CD1

 

[random_thought]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

I have a question

We took a test last night and it came out so vivid clear as day that i am in fact pregnant. I took another one this morning to check again because we obviously both were in disbelief and there is still a line but it is fainter. Is this normal? Why does this happen? And for the love of God, I can't believe I am going to be a mom!

 

[random_thought]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

To compare- here is the test from last night


And here is the one from this morning

 

[random_thought]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

Here is what I found online, can anyone tell me if this is accurate?

I took another test and the line is lighter. Does this mean anything? Should it get darker?

Not necessarily. In general, the positive line will be darker when a greater amount of hCG is present in the urine, but not always. Some tests contain more or less dye (meaning there is just more or less color to "stick" to your hCG.) Some tests are more or less sensitive-- even 2 tests in the same box can be different. Also, your urine may have more or less hCG in it depending on what you ate or drank, or how long it's been since you last peed. Food itself does not cause false results, but can affect how much urine you have and how dilute it is. Eating salty chips and drinking caffeine all day will result in more concentrated pee, whereas gorging on watermelon and ginger ale will result in lots of very dilute pee. But an HPT is not meant to tell you "how" pregnant you are. It only tells you if you are pregnant or not. As long as there is a line in the results window, you are pregnant.

Some women experiencing early miscarriages do notice their lines getting fainter or disappearing entirely, but even if your line gets fainter, it is not a guarantee that you are miscarrying, or that anything is wrong. See FAQ 21 for normal levels of hCG and how to properly measure it.

 

[noelwr]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

random - sorry, that must be stressful. you can't compare 2 tests against each other because of the difference in dye in each, plus it depends what time of day you take it, etc, like in your research. as long as you see the 2nd line, then you can assume you are pregnant. I would say just keep testing first thing every morning. I hope it's not a chemical pregnancy. will keep my fingers crossed for you.

 

[random_thought]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

We just took another digital test and this is what I got, which means I am! Sorry it is backwards!

 

[noelwr]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

well, congratulations are in order, then!

as long as Aunt Flow doesn't show up when she's due, then you can keep smiling.

 

[Dreamer_D]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

Random thought congrats! You cannot tell anything comparing one test to another, they all have different dye lots and so there are differnt amounts of dye from test to test. The digital test in particular is very reliable as you must have a higher amount of hcg for it to read positive compared to the line/dye tests, so you are pregnant!

There is always uncertainty in the early weeks, for everyone. You just need some blind faith and enjoy this moment!

 

[Dreamer_D]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

So I now have a new 19 day cycle.

CD1

Sorry Steal I had a strange short cycle when I was TTC and it was very frustrating. You must have ovulated very very early this month! How long is your luteal phase usually (from ovulation to period)?

 

[Bella_mezzo]

Re: The Official TTC Thread!

Steal! I am so sorry that this cycle wasn't it (and that it was so short and confusing!!!!) I hate when our bodies throw us a curve ball! If you get a change to talk to your Dr about this, I would maybe ask what short cycles can signal. 19 days seems awfully short. A lot of ladies here seem to have had weird extra short or extra long cycles for no reason in the TTC process. Argh!!!!!! It sucks that thing are so confusing and inconclusive!!!! I remember HudsonHawk had a really really long one the month before she got pregnant with sweet baby Aiden.

Random Thought-Congrats!!!!

On my end, nothing much, just slogging through the 2ww. DH is really hoping this is it, but although my b**bs are killing me in the morning and late at night and I have had a little cramping, I think that happens every month, so I am pretty sure that we're not pg...but...who knows!