strmrdr
Super_Ideal_Rock
- Joined
- Nov 1, 2003
- Messages
- 23,295
Next time you have a bad day at work, think of this guy...
Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in
Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs
Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister.
She then sent it to radio station 103.2 on FM dial in
Ft.Wayne, Indiana, who was sponsoring a worst job
experience contest. Needless to say, she won.
Hi Sue,
Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had
a bad day at the office. I know you''ve been feeling down lately at work, so
I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it''s not
so bad after all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must
bore you with a few technicalities of my job. As you know, my office lies at the
bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It''s a wetsuit. This time
of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have
a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It
heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver
through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a
darn good plan, and I''ve used it several times with no complaints. What I do,
when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it
down the back of my wetsuit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It''s
like working in a Jacuzzi. Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to
itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few
seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the
damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened. The hot water
machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now, since I
don''t have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn''t stick to it. However, the
crack of my butt was not as fortunate. When I scratched what I thought was
an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish in to the crack of my butt. I
informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator.
His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five
other divers, were all laughing hysterically. Needless to say I aborted the
dive. I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression stops
totaling thirty -five minutes before I could reach the surface to
begin my chamber dry decompression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing
nothing but my brass helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears
of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me
to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire
out, but I couldn''t poop for two days because my butt was swollen shut.
So, next time you''re having a bad day at work, think about how much
worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt. Now repeat to
yourself, "I love my job, I love my job, I love my job."
Now whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself, is this a jellyfish bad
day?
May you NEVER have a jellyfish bad day!!!
Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in
Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs
Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister.
She then sent it to radio station 103.2 on FM dial in
Ft.Wayne, Indiana, who was sponsoring a worst job
experience contest. Needless to say, she won.
Hi Sue,
Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had
a bad day at the office. I know you''ve been feeling down lately at work, so
I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it''s not
so bad after all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must
bore you with a few technicalities of my job. As you know, my office lies at the
bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It''s a wetsuit. This time
of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have
a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It
heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver
through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a
darn good plan, and I''ve used it several times with no complaints. What I do,
when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it
down the back of my wetsuit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It''s
like working in a Jacuzzi. Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to
itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few
seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the
damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened. The hot water
machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now, since I
don''t have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn''t stick to it. However, the
crack of my butt was not as fortunate. When I scratched what I thought was
an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish in to the crack of my butt. I
informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator.
His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five
other divers, were all laughing hysterically. Needless to say I aborted the
dive. I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression stops
totaling thirty -five minutes before I could reach the surface to
begin my chamber dry decompression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing
nothing but my brass helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears
of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me
to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire
out, but I couldn''t poop for two days because my butt was swollen shut.
So, next time you''re having a bad day at work, think about how much
worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt. Now repeat to
yourself, "I love my job, I love my job, I love my job."
Now whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself, is this a jellyfish bad
day?
May you NEVER have a jellyfish bad day!!!
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