What is a Cocktail Ring?

[Sharon101]

My upgrade er certainly looks like a cocktail ring and Im very aware that it does. First of all the size makes it very in your face (4 c. plus 2 in total in band). The design is outrageous for an er in that I haloed a very large diamond that definately didnt need a halo. And its fancy maybe even gaudy compared to a really elegant design. And as further proof, it is impossible to wear a wedding band with it!!!!

But Im at a stage in my life that I wanted some outrageousness. I dont need symbolism and meaning from my er!!!! I have 3 kids and all my symbolism is in them. My family is what I have to show the world that I have love and am loved etc. My rings are now just for my frivilous fun & enjoyment and to me they have no meaning other than that perhaps Im a big show off, or that I really love diamonds, or that Im very lucky to be able to afford what I have, or that I chose size over quality!!!!!!!

I do think that a cocktail ring has a certain look that is black and white. It either does or it doesnt. Uaually the size of the stone or setting is the deciding factor. What you read into it from there is personal opinion and fashion imo.

Alternatively, I have a tiny pet peeve (very tiny because its hard to find fault with any diamond jewellery).....in that I dislike rhr`s that look like er`s. To me its like wearing 2 er`s, and for some reason I dont love this look.

So I guess this proves that a ring can look like its an er by its design regardless of the hand its worn on, and so too can a cocktail ring look like only a cocktail ring even if it is worn as an er!!!!!

 

[Skippy123]

DS, thanks for the info; I had the wrong thoughts of what one looks like. Great info

; Love the history too!

 

[Green with Envy]

For goodness sakes. A ring is a ring is a ring.

All human beings attach MEANING to things in our world because that is just what human beings do. You need to realize that the meaning each person attaches to events, people, things are just the stories we create in our own minds to find meaning.

A less touchy subject... A car is a car is car. it takes you from one place to another. However we all tend to create stories about the person who we believe drives a Mercedes vs. a pick up truck. One might be more financially stable, or more in debt, or more concerned about impressing others, or more concerned about a trunk to hold golf clubs, or whatever. If you take a step back one must have to agree that any assumptions made about the people just by the cars they drive COULD be totally inaccurate. You just never know... like the old saying do not judge a book by it''s cover.

Now to any of those folks who have somehow felt offended by someone else saying a ring is COCKTAILY. Dear god, get over it! you have attached your own personal meaning and story to this "cocktail" word. you have the power to recreate a NEW meaning in your own mind about what people are saying... a cocktail ring can mean a ring that is luxurious, upscale, extravagant, magnificent! That person might say cocktaily is if they mean it to be a huge compliment! And, worst case scenario, if they said it in a lame attempt to insult you in some passive-aggressive way... then best response from you is to give a big smile and say ''Thank You!'' They could have looked at your ring and said it looks like every other engagement ring, nothing special.

The fact is the ring is not cocktail OR engagement. Those are just words placed next to "RING" to attach meaning because as human beings we are just not satisfied with calling something just what it is... a ring.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

One of the most beautiful engagement rings I have ever seen is Princess Diana''s. It also fits the definition of cocktail ring. So the point here is that the term "cocktail ring" is not derogatory in and of itself. Whether one wants to wear this style of engagement ring is certainly personal preference. But large stones with pave fall into the cocktail ring category, yet they can also be engagement rings. No negative connotation intended.

 

[jewelerman]

This is a fun thread.i hope you dont mind if i add information...Has anyone heard the term "dinner ring"as well as "dress ring"?There were popular terms for a cocktail style ring when it was a must to dress for dinner,if not at home then at places that required a dress code.dinner parties were given mostly for social interaction and to be seen.During the turn of the century people wore their wealth and their best jewelry to these parties.This is how fashion trends were started and spread...keeping up with the Jones....Also keep in mind that wearing diamonds before 5pm was a huge social mistake and you reserved your best big diamond ring for the dinner hour or when you dressed for dinner.Fun thread thanks for posting it!

 

[tradergirl]

Green With Envy: you said a mouthful there. I think people who get insulted harbor doubts themselves; otherwise, why would they care what others label their rings. It seems like excessive self-absorbtion or navel gazing IMO. I love big ornate rings; unfortunately I have small hands and look like a child playing grownup when I wear one.

 

[arjunajane]

Date: 6/7/2008 11:47:37 AM
Author: Green with Envy
For goodness sakes. A ring is a ring is a ring.

All human beings attach MEANING to things in our world because that is just what human beings do. You need to realize that the meaning each person attaches to events, people, things are just the stories we create in our own minds to find meaning.

A less touchy subject... A car is a car is car. it takes you from one place to another. However we all tend to create stories about the person who we believe drives a Mercedes vs. a pick up truck. One might be more financially stable, or more in debt, or more concerned about impressing others, or more concerned about a trunk to hold golf clubs, or whatever. If you take a step back one must have to agree that any assumptions made about the people just by the cars they drive COULD be totally inaccurate. You just never know... like the old saying do not judge a book by it''s cover.

Now to any of those folks who have somehow felt offended by someone else saying a ring is COCKTAILY. Dear god, get over it! you have attached your own personal meaning and story to this ''cocktail'' word. you have the power to recreate a NEW meaning in your own mind about what people are saying... a cocktail ring can mean a ring that is luxurious, upscale, extravagant, magnificent! That person might say cocktaily is if they mean it to be a huge compliment! And, worst case scenario, if they said it in a lame attempt to insult you in some passive-aggressive way... then best response from you is to give a big smile and say ''Thank You!'' They could have looked at your ring and said it looks like every other engagement ring, nothing special.

The fact is the ring is not cocktail OR engagement. Those are just words placed next to ''RING'' to attach meaning because as human beings we are just not satisfied with calling something just what it is... a ring.

Ditto and AMEN to this!

DS, I appreciate the effort you made to clarify this term with your research, well done.

And I hope that we can all leave the debate about IluvCarats ring behind in its thread where it received due attention.
I have to second Neatfreak - ask for opinions, be ready to accept them with grace.

Next topic, move on!

Anyway, cool info, cheers DS for posting it

 

[Green with Envy]

Yes I know- I had a lot to say because recently I have read a ton of posts where people get all worked up and insulted due to misinterpreting meaning. I am thankful this thread was started to end the silly cocktail debate... the recent bickering tarnishes the flavor of the forum.

 

[Lorelei]

Date: 6/7/2008 12:13:14 PM
Author: jewelerman
This is a fun thread.i hope you dont mind if i add information...Has anyone heard the term ''dinner ring''as well as ''dress ring''?There were popular terms for a cocktail style ring when it was a must to dress for dinner,if not at home then at places that required a dress code.dinner parties were given mostly for social interaction and to be seen.During the turn of the century people wore their wealth and their best jewelry to these parties.This is how fashion trends were started and spread...keeping up with the Jones....Also keep in mind that wearing diamonds before 5pm was a huge social mistake and you reserved your best big diamond ring for the dinner hour or when you dressed for dinner.Fun thread thanks for posting it!

I have indeed, I always was given to believe that a dinner ring generally contained a more costly jewel than a cocktail ring.

 

[Pandora II]

Date: 6/7/2008 11:24:41 AM
Author: iluvcarats


OH. So you are saying that there are different types of cocktail rings, and you liked mine....
I stand by my original opinion. I still find referring to someone's e-ring as a cocktail ring insulting.
If I insulted someone, even if I didn't mean to, I would just apologize, because I would feel bad for having insulted them....

Oh please!

You asked for opinions, you got them. Quit whinging!

This is a new thread about the history of cocktail rings - not a rehash of that frankly very tedious debate.

 

[FrekeChild]

Ditto to Pandora, Arjuna, GWE, etc. The debate is over. The thread is as well. It''s time for everyone to get over it.

Fascinating history DS! My mom had a "cocktail ring" that her mother owned, but because they were very very poor it had three very small diamonds in it-but a lot of metal filigree work to make up for it, and cover more finger real estate. I love that it was worn during Prohibition. And for some reason it makes me think of Sex and the City. Not sure why...

Anyway! I''m glad there is a definition out there. And with a fabulous history lesson no less!

 

[jewelerman]

Lorelei,
The ring is the same but the decade is different.Its dressing up your hand to be flashy and noticed with the right people at the right times and being fashionable.The ring is called cocktail when its popular to be at gatherings where drinking is the activity of choice.The 1950s were very popular time for theme parties and new types of drinks.At the turn of the century open drinking and smoking at some functions was considered in poor taste...especially for the ladies ...in some states it was against the law to smoke in public if you were a woman!

 

[lesco]

I don''t mean to rehash this luvcarats issue, I know this thread is not about her but I just wanted to say a few words to her. I apologize to those who might be thinking... WHY THE HECK is lesco still talking about this.... I have a point I promise!

Iluvcarats, I''m sorry you are still somewhat uneasy about what was said about your engagement ring. I personally don''t think anyone here tried to rob meaning out of your engagement ring or anything like that. I have asked a question or two (or a million) here from time to time and I have appreciated the honesty - I know sometimes you hear what you don''t want to hear - That''s the negative side to asking for an honest opinion. PS will be a very boring place if we all have the same opinions or points of view. Right?

Also, I remember you receiving a lot of compliments on your ring. So, take the opinions as a whole and flaunt that beauty.

Thank you DS for the info. and for the record, I don''t see anything negative about the term "cocktail ring" even if it is associated with an engagement ring.These days anything goes in terms of e-rings. It''s all about finding a piece of jewelery that compliments you and your taste/style.

 

[Diamond*Dana]

I also do not understand getting offended by the term ''cocktail ring'', it is just a term.
I am going to need that Rubellite ring

I could care less what others want to call my ring, I know what it symbolizes for me.

 

[NeverEndingUpgrade]

Date: 6/7/2008 11:55:51 AM
Author: diamondseeker2006
One of the most beautiful engagement rings I have ever seen is Princess Diana''s. It also fits the definition of cocktail ring. So the point here is that the term ''cocktail ring'' is not derogatory in and of itself. Whether one wants to wear this style of engagement ring is certainly personal preference. But large stones with pave fall into the cocktail ring category, yet they can also be engagement rings. No negative connotation intended.

I agree. I think that was an $80,000 ring at the time, and that was in 1981 (another source I looked up said $65,000, but who''s counting?)! The center sapphire was 18 cts.! And I remember thinking in my narrow 17-year-old mind that that ring did not look like any engagement ring I had ever seen, considering that all I had ever seen were .5 ct. round diamonds set into 2mm yellow gold bands!

Here''s a link to something about her ring you might enjoy reading: http://engagementrings.lovetoknow.com/wiki/Princess_Diana''s_Engagement_Ring

 

[Futuremrss]

A cocktail ring is another reason to have a cocktail! Who is complaining? No seriously, some people go to many formal events. Like some people go to "Claires" at the mall for prom, others go to Cartier and get the real deal.

 

[krisvrn]

I think people get offended when their ring is referred to as a cocktail ring because cocktail rings are often thought of as a big ring with a lot of small diamond chips designed to make an illusion of a BiG ring.

 

[Sharon101]

Date: 6/8/2008 2:43:24 AM
Author: krisvrn
I think people get offended when their ring is referred to as a cocktail ring because cocktail rings are often thought of as a big ring with a lot of small diamond chips designed to make an illusion of a BiG ring.

Maybe.....but I think a possible reason is to do with the idea of the ring being austentatious and showy. Sort of like a caracature of a ring. Like the big gum ball rings!!!!

 

[Rhea]

Date: 6/8/2008 2:43:24 AM
Author: krisvrn
I think people get offended when their ring is referred to as a cocktail ring because cocktail rings are often thought of as a big ring with a lot of small diamond chips designed to make an illusion of a BiG ring.

Halos do that and are very popular right now. People even flat out say that they want their ring to look big so they are going to halo it to add another 2mm.

 

[777_LDY]

I turned my E-ring into an E-ternity band, what does that mean!?!!

Fun information DS! I''ll take one of these cocktail rings anyday! or just a cocktail.

 

[arjunajane]

LDY, I''ll have a cocktail too!
Actually, I already am, and don''t even own a cocktail ring, lol!
I''m having Frangelico with fresh squeezed limes and ginger ale - yum!

Who wants one , no cocktail ring required!

 

[777_LDY]

That sounds yummy!
It''s 5 o''clock somewhere, right!

 

[reader]

Did any of you grow up hearing funny ''rules'' about jewelry? Even though I was born in the 70s, my mom thought diamonds were not for daytime, and you had to save your largest ring for ''events''...oh and the cocktail ring was something to strive for...to have enough to be able to have a ring that was only worn rarely.

 

[Pandora II]

Date: 6/8/2008 8:36:40 AM
Author: reader
Did any of you grow up hearing funny ''rules'' about jewelry? Even though I was born in the 70s, my mom thought diamonds were not for daytime, and you had to save your largest ring for ''events''...oh and the cocktail ring was something to strive for...to have enough to be able to have a ring that was only worn rarely.

Absolutely.

In fact, other than the melee in my e-ring, I would never wear diamonds before 6.00pm.

Historically it was probably because diamonds were cut to maximise their beauty in candle-light.

My grandmother who has a lot of beautiful pieces - my grandfather was obsessed with bling and travelled a lot - he would bring stones back from India and Ceylon and design settings for them. Sadly he died when I was a month old.

She is very particular about what she wears at what time of day and has quite a few cocktail rings, including a 10ct sapphire with diamond melee that she wears for parties only.

It''s the same with those ''round things from oysters'' - the older you are, the larger the diameter you can wear. Women in their 20''s should wear nothing larger than 6mm, in their 30''s - 7mm etc

 

[Sharon101]

I am so loving this thread because of the rich history and social rules that Im learning about and how they are tied into everything we do including our jewellery choices!!!!

I remember being so poor that Im possitive that we never had any jewellery rules to follow.

Despite being very poor, diamond jewellery was often given for milestone gifts. My nana would save a whole year to buy me a diamond pendant. It was a very big deal even though the diamond was almost not visible, let alone if it had any flaws!!!!!!

Anyway, once my dad bought my mum a very ugly pearl cluster ring. She explained her lack of wearing it by saying it was too good for every day, and that they didnt go out to be able to wear it for special occasions.

Once we bought some sappire earrings from a magazine add. I remember that they were $10 each and when they arrived we thought that they were fair for the price!!!!! We were easily pleased. LOL

Maybe one rule that we inforced on ourselves was that wearing too many little pieces together looked cheap.....as in who where you kidding. Obviously we thought it better to wear just one cheap piece because at least you werent trying to be fancy!!!!!

Mostly we were way too poor to worry about jewellery though!!!!

But we didnt know we were missing out because it wasnt a priority or an expectation....so we were happy with other things!!!!

 

[Ellen]

Date: 6/8/2008 8:19:02 AM
Author: 777_LDY
That sounds yummy!
It''s 5 o''clock somewhere, right!

I KNEW I liked you.

Love all the posts here, very interesting!

 

[777_LDY]

Date: 6/8/2008 9:29:37 AM
Author: Ellen

Date: 6/8/2008 8:19:02 AM
Author: 777_LDY
That sounds yummy!
It''s 5 o''clock somewhere, right!

I KNEW I liked you.

Love all the posts here, very interesting!

It''s 5 o''clock somewhere!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Ellen]

!

 

[iheartscience]

Very interesting, ds! Thanks for the info!

 

[Harriet]

Thanks for the lesson, DS.
P.S. Since I don''t drink, what do I call my halo-ed ring-to-be? Just a ring, right?