steph72276
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Calling all the Pregnant PS''ers
- Thread starter Kaleigh
- Start date
Allison D.
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swimmer
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Congrats Mara and RPS, and welcome babies T and Benjamin! Yay! And easy pushing QT, you'll have your bundle of child coming soon!
Wow, babies. That's what's at the end of this process? I think I'm behind on the mental part.
Thanks everyone that chimed in on the morning sickness suggestions. Eating snacks more regularly has certainly helped somewhat, but has not radically improved things. Still nauseous almost all the time and occasionaly miserable. The extra calories is not great on the weight gain front, as I'm not actually puking or able to exercise much, but I guess at this point its about survival. Also pretty concerned about functioning at work most days, but I guess I just need to take it one day at a time.
Mara, if you ever get a free minute to read this thread now that your on the other side, thanks for the coke suggestion. Even though the regular Coke looked completely revolting at the lunch cafeteria, I tried it anyway and it did help. Makes the stomach feel more settled in an important way, though the sugar and caffeine does make it kind of zingy and unsettled in another. Its been a long time since I had regular coke on a regular basis.
Mer, your mother in law sounds like a piece of work! Preparing you for toddler-raising, eh? Frankly, whatever approach you decide to go with, the most important thing seems to be getting your husband to recognize her manipulative behavior and totally on-board with whatever method of dealing you two come up with. You can set whatever guidelines you want and she will just go around you straight to pulling on her son's strings until she gets what she wants unless he is also firmly in on the plan. I'd just ignore her passive-aggressiveness as much as you can. Expecting her to be normal is probably not realistic. Sounds like your husband is sometimes aware she is a little out of line or is high-drama as he says, but a little slow to realize the full extent of the manipulation and inappropriate behavior. Makes sense, he was raised by this woman and not some normal, sane person so he adjusted to the one he got! Bleh, what a horrible reward for asking if your shower could be at her house.
HH, sorry you are having a rough time with your hubby. Sounds like he needs to adjust his expectations to the point of at least being able to articulate what you are doing to annoy him, and at some level deal with the fact that you are not entirely in control! (Your little hormone monster is already running things!) Which is not to excuse anything and everything you might do, but he might need to give your behavior a larger cushion than usual. Dont know how to convey that to him, but maybe he needs to hear it from the doc or some BTDT dad/husbands.
Luckily I don't think I have been a megab!$&h yet - well, maybe at night when I get mega-huffy when hubby tries anything but staying far far away. He's definitely not getting any, it has been established that I am completely intolerant with any contact with my abdomen at all, but he'll still occasionally reach over and try for, oh, a square inch of contact between our pinkies or lower legs or something which should be far enough away from the forbidden zones but yet... I will still tolerate it for a few minutes before shrugging away and trying to maintain my own little cocoon. And he wakes up in the morning slighly sad that I am rejecting him so firmly... which I am most definitely!! I guess I'm trying not to be mean about it, but I'm just really resistant to any contact. Chalk it up to the crazy hormones, I am already so uncomfortable most of the day and night that I just want to be left alone to deal. And then I am this pathetic nauseous lump of a wife during the day most of the time... its kind of ridiculous really. I guess hubby's do have to put up with a lot of unexplicable changes in their wives that make no sense to them long before there is a baby or a notable belly around.
I had a mostly functioning body before this pregnancy, did we really need to mess me up so badly just to start growing a little teeny tiny bean? My question of the day.
Wow, babies. That's what's at the end of this process? I think I'm behind on the mental part.
Thanks everyone that chimed in on the morning sickness suggestions. Eating snacks more regularly has certainly helped somewhat, but has not radically improved things. Still nauseous almost all the time and occasionaly miserable. The extra calories is not great on the weight gain front, as I'm not actually puking or able to exercise much, but I guess at this point its about survival. Also pretty concerned about functioning at work most days, but I guess I just need to take it one day at a time.
Mara, if you ever get a free minute to read this thread now that your on the other side, thanks for the coke suggestion. Even though the regular Coke looked completely revolting at the lunch cafeteria, I tried it anyway and it did help. Makes the stomach feel more settled in an important way, though the sugar and caffeine does make it kind of zingy and unsettled in another. Its been a long time since I had regular coke on a regular basis.
Mer, your mother in law sounds like a piece of work! Preparing you for toddler-raising, eh? Frankly, whatever approach you decide to go with, the most important thing seems to be getting your husband to recognize her manipulative behavior and totally on-board with whatever method of dealing you two come up with. You can set whatever guidelines you want and she will just go around you straight to pulling on her son's strings until she gets what she wants unless he is also firmly in on the plan. I'd just ignore her passive-aggressiveness as much as you can. Expecting her to be normal is probably not realistic. Sounds like your husband is sometimes aware she is a little out of line or is high-drama as he says, but a little slow to realize the full extent of the manipulation and inappropriate behavior. Makes sense, he was raised by this woman and not some normal, sane person so he adjusted to the one he got! Bleh, what a horrible reward for asking if your shower could be at her house.
HH, sorry you are having a rough time with your hubby. Sounds like he needs to adjust his expectations to the point of at least being able to articulate what you are doing to annoy him, and at some level deal with the fact that you are not entirely in control! (Your little hormone monster is already running things!) Which is not to excuse anything and everything you might do, but he might need to give your behavior a larger cushion than usual. Dont know how to convey that to him, but maybe he needs to hear it from the doc or some BTDT dad/husbands.
Luckily I don't think I have been a megab!$&h yet - well, maybe at night when I get mega-huffy when hubby tries anything but staying far far away. He's definitely not getting any, it has been established that I am completely intolerant with any contact with my abdomen at all, but he'll still occasionally reach over and try for, oh, a square inch of contact between our pinkies or lower legs or something which should be far enough away from the forbidden zones but yet... I will still tolerate it for a few minutes before shrugging away and trying to maintain my own little cocoon. And he wakes up in the morning slighly sad that I am rejecting him so firmly... which I am most definitely!! I guess I'm trying not to be mean about it, but I'm just really resistant to any contact. Chalk it up to the crazy hormones, I am already so uncomfortable most of the day and night that I just want to be left alone to deal. And then I am this pathetic nauseous lump of a wife during the day most of the time... its kind of ridiculous really. I guess hubby's do have to put up with a lot of unexplicable changes in their wives that make no sense to them long before there is a baby or a notable belly around.
I had a mostly functioning body before this pregnancy, did we really need to mess me up so badly just to start growing a little teeny tiny bean? My question of the day.
somethingshiny
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QT~ Looks like it''s probably been a long induction so far, glad you got the epi, now you can get some rest before the BIG SHOW! Contractions feel (with your hand) very cool after the epi. When you''re dealing with the pain you can''t marvel at the way your body is working, but with the epi you can! Good luck!!!
meresal
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China- I''m really hoping that moving out of the current city is going to help. The great thing is that DH is very ready to get away from this area as well. Which is really nice for me, and I don''t feel liek I am "dragging" him away from his family. Right now, there are no boundaries. It''s like you are always available when you are only 10 minutes away, but I feel like being 40 minutes away, we can''t just "drop by" anymore, so there will be a more formal feeling when we visit. If that makes sense?
Thanks swimmer.
cara- Thanks. I am very lucky that DH realizes it as much as he does. It is a very fine line that I have to walk though, because if he thinks in any way that I am "attacking" his family, he will defend them in a minute. We don''t talk much about them anymore, but when we do, our conversations are very calculated (on my side at least), so that I don''t say things that will upset him. Which is totally understandable. I think that is how everyone is.
Thanks swimmer.
cara- Thanks. I am very lucky that DH realizes it as much as he does. It is a very fine line that I have to walk though, because if he thinks in any way that I am "attacking" his family, he will defend them in a minute. We don''t talk much about them anymore, but when we do, our conversations are very calculated (on my side at least), so that I don''t say things that will upset him. Which is totally understandable. I think that is how everyone is.
gingerB
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mara - congrats to you and greg, mamasita! can''t wait to see pics of baby T and read your brith story!!!!!
lindsey - really glad you are clicking with your doc and his staff. it''s sooo important to have good rapport with the ppl so invlolved in your care
qt - easy labor dust coming your way!!! can''t wait for your updates!
mer - yikes...i''m so sorry your MIL has been causing so much drama. we had a lot of drama initally in our relationship with our families and overstepping boundaries and it finally culminated in hubby and i pulling away from our families pretty severely and carefully controlling what we were willing to let into our life until they got the point. it was hard because we are both really close to our families and it hurt to not be close, but they just weren''t listening to what was and was not acceptable behavior. hubbs and i pretty much decided together what we were willing to accept and what we were not willing to accept and stuck to it. united front. sometimes that meant i got hurt, soemtimes it meant that he got hurt, but we held on and now things are soooo much better. our families understan now that he and i are now nuclear and they are part of the next "inner circle", but understanding that they are #2 when it comes to our decisions and WE are number 1. sounds harsh but true. this is something that is probably going to be an issue again when the long awaitied grandson is born
, but because we''ve established the groundwork, hopefully things will be relatively smooth.
======================================
ummm, just realized once qt delivers, i''m next up dd-wise
whoah. burk, mtjoya, i believe we are the next round ladies. are ya''ll ready?
first day back at work again. so far enjoying the distraction from fretting about progression. it''s really amusing to see the reactions of the patients/co-workers/ancillary staff/random strangers with boundary issues when they ask when i''m due and i reply "next week."
lol. everyone''s eyes bug out and they are like what the H-E-double-hockey-sticks are you doing here at work?!?! shouldn''t you be at home tied to your bed or something?!
lindsey - really glad you are clicking with your doc and his staff. it''s sooo important to have good rapport with the ppl so invlolved in your care
qt - easy labor dust coming your way!!! can''t wait for your updates!
mer - yikes...i''m so sorry your MIL has been causing so much drama. we had a lot of drama initally in our relationship with our families and overstepping boundaries and it finally culminated in hubby and i pulling away from our families pretty severely and carefully controlling what we were willing to let into our life until they got the point. it was hard because we are both really close to our families and it hurt to not be close, but they just weren''t listening to what was and was not acceptable behavior. hubbs and i pretty much decided together what we were willing to accept and what we were not willing to accept and stuck to it. united front. sometimes that meant i got hurt, soemtimes it meant that he got hurt, but we held on and now things are soooo much better. our families understan now that he and i are now nuclear and they are part of the next "inner circle", but understanding that they are #2 when it comes to our decisions and WE are number 1. sounds harsh but true. this is something that is probably going to be an issue again when the long awaitied grandson is born
======================================
ummm, just realized once qt delivers, i''m next up dd-wise
first day back at work again. so far enjoying the distraction from fretting about progression. it''s really amusing to see the reactions of the patients/co-workers/ancillary staff/random strangers with boundary issues when they ask when i''m due and i reply "next week."
qtiekiki
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KimberlyH
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Mer, I haven''t followed the MIL saga closely but it sounds like you really need to come up with a plan that works for you and your husband about how you''re going to handle her and stick to it. No more bending to her wants. That may include you both not asking her for things (like using her house for the shower), but in the long run it will be best for all involved. Sorry you''re upset.
Qtie, hope you''re doing well! Lots of good thoughts to you.
We went to lunch and the zoo this afternoon. I didn''t get as much work done as planned but it was nice to spend time with my husband.
Qtie, hope you''re doing well! Lots of good thoughts to you.
We went to lunch and the zoo this afternoon. I didn''t get as much work done as planned but it was nice to spend time with my husband.
Jena17
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Congratulations all of you new moms out there! How exciting!!!!
I can''t wait for my day, I am only in my 6th week of pregnancy, not many symptoms yet. Just tired and my (.)(.)''s are soooo sore! My first U/S is in 3 weeks, so that will be when I get really excited, right now it''s hard to believe still for some reason! I always said I didn''t want to know if it was a boy or a girl but I don''t think I am going to want to wait! I want to know now!!!
I was wondering if there were any books or magazines that were very informative for you ladies? This is our first baby and I want to learn all I can now to be prepared!
I can''t wait for my day, I am only in my 6th week of pregnancy, not many symptoms yet. Just tired and my (.)(.)''s are soooo sore! My first U/S is in 3 weeks, so that will be when I get really excited, right now it''s hard to believe still for some reason! I always said I didn''t want to know if it was a boy or a girl but I don''t think I am going to want to wait! I want to know now!!!
I was wondering if there were any books or magazines that were very informative for you ladies? This is our first baby and I want to learn all I can now to be prepared!
vespergirl
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Kaleigh
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meresal
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Ginger- Thanks for your input. When we move into the new house, we will be sure to sit down and decide on "house" rules. They will apply to both sets of parents, so that there is no biased being spread. I appreciate your input. Best of luck in keeping up your boundaries after your lil' man arrives.
Kimberly- You are exactly right. We can't ask for ANYTHING. I am usually very very good about this, and DH is the one that still has her do small things for him (He is the son, it's hard to break of all things). I guess I didn't realize that asking to use their house, because they have a large backyard and large sitting areas, was really asking all that much. My mistake. Things had become so much better, I think that clouded my judgement. How quickly we are reminded when we make those mistakes though.
Qt- Welcome Jaron!!!! What an incredible 3 days this has been!!! Healthy babies all around!!!
Kimberly- You are exactly right. We can't ask for ANYTHING. I am usually very very good about this, and DH is the one that still has her do small things for him (He is the son, it's hard to break of all things). I guess I didn't realize that asking to use their house, because they have a large backyard and large sitting areas, was really asking all that much. My mistake. Things had become so much better, I think that clouded my judgement. How quickly we are reminded when we make those mistakes though.
Qt- Welcome Jaron!!!! What an incredible 3 days this has been!!! Healthy babies all around!!!
Allison D.
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Jas12
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CONGRATS QT !!!!! Yay! I Just logged on to check. Hope it all went well. Can''t wait to ''meet'' baby Jaron.
Wow, it''s been a busy day here
All these updates remind me of when Cohen was born and i sent my DH home to collect some stuff for the hospital. I asked him to send a quick message to my PS friends and quickly wrote the instructions on the website, what forum and what thread to write in. What i forgot to tell him is that if he didn''t click on the last page he wouldn''t see his post (i think this thread was around page 200 back then) so he kept looking for the post and not seeing it so he just kept re-posting, thinking it was a glitch. When i finally got home this thread had about 12 identical posts from "me"
So note to the rest of you, find someone more familiar with PS
Wow, it''s been a busy day here
All these updates remind me of when Cohen was born and i sent my DH home to collect some stuff for the hospital. I asked him to send a quick message to my PS friends and quickly wrote the instructions on the website, what forum and what thread to write in. What i forgot to tell him is that if he didn''t click on the last page he wouldn''t see his post (i think this thread was around page 200 back then) so he kept looking for the post and not seeing it so he just kept re-posting, thinking it was a glitch. When i finally got home this thread had about 12 identical posts from "me"
vespergirl
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Welcome Jena! Congrats on your pregnancy!Date: 2/1/2010 7:53:17 PM
Author: Jena17
Congratulations all of you new moms out there! How exciting!!!!
I can''t wait for my day, I am only in my 6th week of pregnancy, not many symptoms yet. Just tired and my (.)(.)''s are soooo sore! My first U/S is in 3 weeks, so that will be when I get really excited, right now it''s hard to believe still for some reason! I always said I didn''t want to know if it was a boy or a girl but I don''t think I am going to want to wait! I want to know now!!!
I was wondering if there were any books or magazines that were very informative for you ladies? This is our first baby and I want to learn all I can now to be prepared!
My favorite pregnancy books are:
I''m Pregnant! by Lesley Regan, MD. GREAT photos of the baby in utero from the very first weeks, and very informative. Also talks about things like the mother''s emotional state, etc., not just the baby''s growth. My favorite pregnancy book.
The Girlfriend''s Guide to Pregnancy, by Vicki Iovine. This is a fun read, especially if it''s your first pregnancy. Iovine is not a medical professional, but just a woman who had 4 kids in 5 years. The book is a humorous, yet still informative, guide to pregnancy. It tells you lots of things that other women know about pregnancy, that your dr. probably won''t mention. I was cracking up through this whole book.
The one book that I DON''T recommend is What to Expect When You''re Expecting. I know that it''s promoted as the "essential" book, but I think it''s full of alarmist rhetoric that only makes women hysterical and terrified that everything that they are exposed to is going to harm their baby. My friends who read that book became a bunch of militant freaks during their pregnancies, and avoided everything from nuts to cheese to roast beef. Most of their kids were born with food allergies
Congrats again!
Dreamer_D
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steph72276
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KimberlyH
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Mer, it''s not that I think what you asked her was a lot, or wrong, just knowing what you shared it''s pretty clear if you give her an inch she''ll take a mile, to put it tritely. You''ve been reminded, in a difficult way, and now you know no more inches! He is her son and it is hard to break the habit, especially if he''s not ready and willing to do so.
Deep breaths.
QTie, we were posting at the same time. Congrats on baby Jaron''s arrival.
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I came here to congratulate Mara on the birth of T, and learned that I must also congratulate qtiekiki on the birth of Jaron. Great work, ladies! I congratulate both of you. When my daughter was in pre-school one of her friends' moms asked me if I had an easy labor and I said, yes, indeed. (Whitney was adopted in Colombia.) You two did it the hard way. I won't say, "the old-fashioned way" because adoption is as ancient as Moses, but certainly your way took more physical endurance!
Hugs to you and the babettes!
Deb/AGBF
Hugs to you and the babettes!
Deb/AGBF
DivaDiamond007
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mtjoya
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gailrmv
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What a very very exciting couple of days here!
Congratulations again to Steph, RPS, Mara and QTIE!!!!! I am so excited for all of you, your hubbies, and the babies!!! Did I get this right that everyone had boys?!?!
THe first few weeks were really hard for me. Well, they had highs and lows! Hormones + exhaustion + recovering + adjusting to changes in your life can be really tough, at least it was for me. I wish for each of you to have as easy of a time as possible, and remember to take TONS OF PHOTOS!!! They grow so fast - it''s cliche but true.
About the what to expect when you''re expecting book - so many people warned me not to read it, including my good friend who is an OBGYN. But, someone loaned it to me, and I read it anyway. I didn''t find it bad at all! It really did not cause me to worry or stress. Maybe I am an oddball, but I actually thought it was a helpful book. I did not care for the girlfriend''s guide even though most people loved it. I DID really like your pregnancy week by week.
Congratulations again to Steph, RPS, Mara and QTIE!!!!! I am so excited for all of you, your hubbies, and the babies!!! Did I get this right that everyone had boys?!?!
THe first few weeks were really hard for me. Well, they had highs and lows! Hormones + exhaustion + recovering + adjusting to changes in your life can be really tough, at least it was for me. I wish for each of you to have as easy of a time as possible, and remember to take TONS OF PHOTOS!!! They grow so fast - it''s cliche but true.
About the what to expect when you''re expecting book - so many people warned me not to read it, including my good friend who is an OBGYN. But, someone loaned it to me, and I read it anyway. I didn''t find it bad at all! It really did not cause me to worry or stress. Maybe I am an oddball, but I actually thought it was a helpful book. I did not care for the girlfriend''s guide even though most people loved it. I DID really like your pregnancy week by week.
jcrow
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somethingshiny
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QT~ Congratulations to your family on the arrival of Jaron!! (my cousin has a little boy named Jaron, yours is only the 2nd time I''ve heard that name!!) Take lots of time cuddling that baby!
Jena~ Welcome and congrats!! Be careful about how much you read. With my first I read everything I could get my hands on. I became irrationally afraid that I''d have a hermaphrodite. Some statistics just don''t need to be known! I know some women that the doc has taken books from because they''d get overly anxious. Be prepared but not obsessed!
Jena~ Welcome and congrats!! Be careful about how much you read. With my first I read everything I could get my hands on. I became irrationally afraid that I''d have a hermaphrodite. Some statistics just don''t need to be known! I know some women that the doc has taken books from because they''d get overly anxious. Be prepared but not obsessed!
MonkeyPie
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KtIceRN
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So Excited
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