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Disappointed...help!

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dani13

dani13

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Nov 12, 2004
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6,183
Hi everyone,

As many of you know, my boyfriend and I got engaged 1 month ago (I still have to take more pics for you guys- I promise, I will!) Anyway, I purposely asked to have the head/basket set low, I did not want it to be high at all. It is an emerald cut solitiaite, and all around the basket, there are little pave diamonds.

Even though I love my setting, I HATE that all of the w-bands I have tried on do not sit flush. Not even close. The head is so low, not even the thinnest band can slip under it. I really want to wear both together. What should I do? Getting a band made (curved) to sit flush is out of the question. I mean, if it were close to flush, I could handle it. But it isn''t at all. There is a huge space. What should I do???
 
I''m sorry you''re diappointed. Why is getting a curved band out of the question? You wouldn''t necessarily have to have one made, there are probably curved bands that would fit with your e-ring...
 
Can you have the head swapped for one that sits higher?

Or maybe you can wear the e-ring on your right hand, and the w-band on your left (or vice versa)? I know some ladies (like reena) were planning on that, because there was just no way a w-band would fit with their e-ring.

33.gif
 
How can I just have the head swapped, when there is all of that pave under the basket??? I love it!! Whah!!!!
emcry.gif


JD- I dont know, I just dont like the idea of a curved band, especially because there will be days I just want to wear my w-band alone, and to me, the curved bands look strange alone...
 
I totally understand. There was an antique setting I was looking at for a while that would''ve required a curved band. I decided that if I wanted it, I would get the curved band to wear with my e-ring, and get another straight band to wear when I wanted to just be wearing a wedding band. I figured this was a good option also because it allowed me to get a thinner curved band which wouldn''t overwhelm the e-ring, and a seperate thicker band that would look more substantial when that was all I was wearing. It also allows for two different looks, which I really liked. Have you considered doing something like that?
 
Oh, and I forgot to mention, I have one friend who has a curved band that she just rotates to the straight side on top when she wears it alone. It doesn''t seem to bother her. I guess it depends on the personality type...I don''t think I could do that. :)
 
well....I never thought of that. That is an idea...you mean I could get 2 rings!!!!!!!!!! Actually, that may work out after all....
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I think JDGirl''s solution is right on!!! (who wouldn''t love an excuse to get TWO rings??)
 
No, but seriously. I dont think I like the look of a curved band....
 
I can''t tell from your description if this would work for you or not, but I got engaged in August and no ring will sit flush w/ my e-ring. I too really didn''t want to have a curved wedding band made- looks to matchy-matchy, "bridal settish" for me. Also I know that there will be times when I would like to wear just my w-ring, so I didn''t want a w-ring that would have a dent or a notch in it.

My mom went to a local jeweler and was having some stuff repaired and told them of my dilemma- and the jeweler told my mom about using a custom "spacer"ring in-between the e-ring and wedding band. He said that if your ring is platinum, you can make it pretty thin, so it will basically vanish between the w & e rings.
Researcher has one to go between her gorgeous e and w rings.
What is boils down to is the ring is shaped on one side to fit into your e-ring, and then the other side is flat- you can go as thin as 2mm I believe and the spacer basically disappears between the e & w rings.

I really like the stacked look and like the options that this will provide for me, now I just have to pick out my wedding band.
 
Ooh, I didn't think of the 2 ring option! I have the same problem as you and I've basically resigned myself to the fact that I'm going to switch my e-ring to my right hand and wear my wedding band on the left. I didn't like the idea of a curved band either and just couldn't come up with another solution. The spacer is a good idea but I just don't have that much real estate on my finger for 3 rings! I feel a little sad about moving my e-ring to my right hand, especially because it will have to be sized up, but I'll get over it once I have a sparkly eternity band on my left!
 
Dani,

i''m in the very same predicament and not so certain about what i''m going to do. I also wanted the basket to be low, so now nothing sits flush. i haven''t tried any curved bands, but i''m assuming i''m not going to love them...i''m not certain if the basket can be raised or maybe i''ll just have to get a non-basket setting? emerald cuts are tough because they are rectangular...
 
i wish that jewelers and custom designers etc would bring up the wedding ring when designing or working on the e-ring. it seems like so many people don''t think about the additional ring they will be adding and then encounter this very problem! i have a friend who has a marquis and never even got a w-ring because nothing worked out.

good luck, not sure what to advise...i guess i was a psycho obsessed planner since when we were designing my e-ring i specifically discussed the w-ring with the jeweler because i knew i wouldn''t be happy with anything but straight and flush....hope you find a great solution!!
 
This is njc''s ering and custom remade wedding band (diamonds belonged to grandma). I think the curve is subtle, elegant, and beautiful.

njc_set.jpg




This is Peachy''s lucky find at the jeweler''s, not custom but matches her ering perfectly.

ringDSC00569.jpg
 
I think it''s AGBF who had a really cool set of bands made for her solitaire. Instead of a curve it literally has a "hole" in it. That hole fits perfectly around the head of her solitiare. Then you can get a regular band for the days you don''t wear your set.
 
You may be able to get a band made that is notched so it will sit flush. The notch does not have to be noticeable if done right. Then get a plain band or semi/eternity band to wear if you aren''t wearing your engagement ring.
 
Thanks, everyone, for your suggestions. If anyone has any pics, please post!!!
 
Both pictures of the w-band look great with the e-ring. Very clever designs.

But having said that, you need to ask yourself what design would the ring of your husband-to-be look like? Curvy like yours too? I am a traditionist when it comes to wedding bands, that it must be an identical pair. You may think otherwise, and it''s all about personal choice.

This is a great post in the sense that it serves as a good pointer for online vendors/sellers to ask all their future clients if the solitaire is for an engagement, and if it is, advise clients what is the ''lowest'' the head of the ring should go, to allow the e-ring to flush with the w-band.

I had a hand in the setting of my e-ring and reminded the sales person time and again to make sure there is just the minimum clearance for it, because I too, didn''t want the head set too high.
 
Here''s a pic with my curved band - another lucky find, not made as a set, but a perfect match..

treysset1.jpg
 
Treysar- your set is soooo pretty!!!

Mrssparkles- I know, I want to get a w-band to match with my FI''s- his will be just a plain platinum band, and hopefully we will find a design we both like.

But I also really want a diamond w-band. And, now I feel like a fool, because I did have a say in my ring too, and I didnt even think of what would happen when it came time to choose my w-band. I dont know, I really dont want to change my setting at all, I love it! Dilemma!!!!
 
Dani,

Here''s another direction you can go in--a Cartier (type) rolling ring.

I had the same problem with my original e-ring setting. My first wedding band was shaped to match the curve on my e-ring. Then we went on our honeymoon and unfortunately got mugged. My wedding band was of course stolen. (Luckily I did not bring my e-ring on the trip.) As a result of my experience, I wanted something alittle different. I also wanted something in-stock. The rolling ring bands will gently adjust to the curve of your ring and be completely natural.

I still have the rolling ring, but I re-set my e-ring a few years ago to a flatter profile, so I can''t post pics that will be relevant to your situation.

Just a thought.
 
Here's Dani's ring for those of us that needed reminding.
Can we have some more pics so we can see this pave in the head?

Emerald cut
1.70 ct
G/VS1
d 67.3%
t 62%
Pol/Sym VG/G
Fluor- none

My mom has an EC for her Ering, and wears a simple notched wr - and has never liked it.
I feel your pain. I'm kinda liking the 2 ring idea - or a spacer band like researcers - or wear the ering on your right hand.

I got into an argument with my Jeweler over this very issue when designing my ering.
He firmly believes a ering and wedding ring shouldn't be worn together. Blah! That's a load of hooey.

Scintillating...

Danisringreminder.jpg
 
My curved band... Took me forever to decide on it but I like having the perfect match!
I have a straight band too (from my original set) and there is truly never a time when I wear only a wedding band. When I am doing something that is too rough for my diamond, I don''t wear my band either! If you need one to wear solo, I''d get a plain one to match the fiance''s and then a diamond one for the rest of the time!

New ring photo g.jpg
 
style="WIDTH: 99%; HEIGHT: 40px">I got into an argument with my Jeweler over this very issue when designing my ering.
He firmly believes a ering and wedding ring shouldn''t be worn together.
Click to expand...

Has he been booted yet?
 
Dani,

I didn''t know the shape of your ring. So the rolling ring won''t work...
My Mom had a 2 carat EC with 2 baguette sides. Her ring must been set higher as the wedding set would sit flush. I wish I could be more help.
 
Date: 12/13/2005 5:39:01 PM
Author: Mara
i wish that jewelers and custom designers etc would bring up the wedding ring when designing or working on the e-ring. it seems like so many people don''t think about the additional ring they will be adding and then encounter this very problem! i have a friend who has a marquis and never even got a w-ring because nothing worked out.

good luck, not sure what to advise...i guess i was a psycho obsessed planner since when we were designing my e-ring i specifically discussed the w-ring with the jeweler because i knew i wouldn''t be happy with anything but straight and flush....hope you find a great solution!!
Click to expand...
Here here! I am so surprised that more jewelers don''t mention this when people pick fancy shaped diamonds or want a lower setting. Mara, thank you for writing my exact thoughts.

One of my girlfriends is looking at emerald cuts now and I mentioned to make sure the setting is high enough for a band to fit underneath if she didn''t want a curved band. She thanked me as she hadn''t thought of that.
33.gif
 
By all means try a notched band (i.e. one that has a flat part that fits precisely under the basket - I think the name is used for other things too). If you wanted a simple band anyway, it can't be so bad to have a normal one too if you ever wanted to wear one without the ring.

There's a huge gap there - and it would take a wide spacer - allot more than Researcher's ring.


Perhaps your jeweler has one for you to try out...
 
Hi,

You didn''t mention where you purchased your e-ring from?

If bought locally, i would go back, and explain my situation. It maybe that the setting only needs a slight mod. to accomodate a w-band. It''s worth talking to a jellewer, and exploring the possibilities.

good luck...dyanne
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I had a curved eternity band made to curve around my e-ring, and I like how it looks together. On the very few days that I actually wear the w-ring alone, I just turn the w-ring around, so that the straight side is facing outward like JDgirl''s friend does. I find that this was a good solution. Other than that I would suggest getting 2 rings like other people said.
 
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