Five Traits Men Look for Before Marriage...

[Anna0499]

I don't really buy into all these "why" lists, i.e. Why Men Marry, Why Men Cheat, etc., because why do men do ANYTHING?! Anyways, I thought this article was funny with all the quotes from "real men" (i.e. bait-and-switch reference) and would make a good discussion topic. Your thoughts?

http://lifestyle.msn.com/relationships/couplesandmarriage/articlecosmo.aspx?cp-documentid=7822448&GT1=32001

 

[HeadOverHeels4James]

WOW I think this list is total BS.

 

[Lauren8211]

I agree with most of it. Men are attracted to confident women, so naturally women who are independent, take care of themselves, and love sex, are going to attract long term mates.

I don''t think these are hard and fast rules, but it all comes back to being confident. Confidence is attractive!

 

[HeadOverHeels4James]

off topic but........I always wonder what kinda of guys they poll when girly magazines post articles. Usually they are completely out there, and are things no real man would say! HAHA Does anyone else feel this way

 

[ladypirate]

Date: 6/17/2008 3:43:43 PM
Author: HeadOverHeels4James
WOW I think this list is total BS.

Just out of curiosity--which parts do you think are bs?

I think that, while of course a few things are exaggerated, most men are indeed attracted to independent, interesting and loving women who are great in the sack and care about their well-being.

 

[meresal]

Date: 6/17/2008 3:48:08 PM
Author: Lauren8211
I agree with most of it. Men are attracted to confident women, so naturally women who are independent, take care of themselves, and love sex, are going to attract long term mates.

I don''t think these are hard and fast rules, but it all comes back to being confident. Confidence is attractive!

Lauren: I tend to agree. The Independant factor would also explain a little why more men are looking to relationships with older women. Usually more stable; job wise, financially, and sometimes emotionally.

 

[Anna0499]

Date: 6/17/2008 3:51:24 PM
Author: HeadOverHeels4James
off topic but........I always wonder what kinda of guys they poll when girly magazines post articles. Usually they are completely out there, and are things no real man would say! HAHA Does anyone else feel this way

Yeah, I think the guys quotes in Cosmo are always hilarious! If I asked my SO these questions he''d be like, "Umm...likes sports, cooks well, funny..., etc." I bet they keep funny men on staff just to reply to some of these questions. It''s obvious that no list of this type can ever be exhaustive and I agree a lot of the comments were exagerrated but found some truth in the article...although some men probably do want the type of girl who will cater to all of his needs 24/7 and put him above her friends, etc. (not PSers, of course) but there are matches for everyone out there (I''d like to think).

 

[Anna0499]

Date: 6/17/2008 3:56:25 PM
Author: meresal

Date: 6/17/2008 3:48:08 PM
Author: Lauren8211
I agree with most of it. Men are attracted to confident women, so naturally women who are independent, take care of themselves, and love sex, are going to attract long term mates.

I don''t think these are hard and fast rules, but it all comes back to being confident. Confidence is attractive!

Lauren: I tend to agree. The Independant factor would also explain a little why more men are looking to relationships with older women. Usually more stable; job wise, financially, and sometimes emotionally.

I also think that''s why the marriage age continues to rise. I''m not knocking young marriages (okay maybe I am just a little bit but only really young teenage marriages) but I think marriages between two people who fully know THEMSELVES, combined with the stability factors, probably have a better survival rate.

Do you guys watch that show "Engaged & Underage"? It''s my guilty pleasure and at times it''s like watching a car wreck...it''s sometimes painful to watch (other times sweet and touching) but I can''t turn the channel!

 

[HeadOverHeels4James]

Date: 6/17/2008 3:53:29 PM
Author: ladypirate

Date: 6/17/2008 3:43:43 PM

Author: HeadOverHeels4James

WOW I think this list is total BS.

Just out of curiosity--which parts do you think are bs?


I think that, while of course a few things are exaggerated, most men are indeed attracted to independent, interesting and loving women who are great in the sack and care about their well-being.

Yea..in my case at least..my FF and I like to be each others total life. I know that sounds crazy but it''s just us. He has had a horrible life before he met me, and every person in his life screwed him. He has a VERY hard time trusting anyone. I guess our situation is a little different. For the most part I do agree with this list in general relationships, just not mine!

If that makes any sense! haha

 

[NewEnglandLady]

I always finding myself trolling through the LIW board because you guys always have interesting articles and factoids to post

I thing these are all healthy things to be attracted to: independence, active between the sheets

Nothing wrong with any of that!

I tend to think that people are attracted to their equals--a dependent guy who sits in front of the TV all day wouldn't really have interest in a career-minded, independent woman. Nor would she really have much interest in him. You can only love somebody you respect first.

 

[sunnyd]

Alright ladies, you heard ''em. If you''re not doin it all the time, you''re not getting married!

 

[ladypirate]

Date: 6/17/2008 4:05:19 PM
Author: HeadOverHeels4James

Date: 6/17/2008 3:53:29 PM
Author: ladypirate

Date: 6/17/2008 3:43:43 PM

Author: HeadOverHeels4James

WOW I think this list is total BS.

Just out of curiosity--which parts do you think are bs?


I think that, while of course a few things are exaggerated, most men are indeed attracted to independent, interesting and loving women who are great in the sack and care about their well-being.

Yea..in my case at least..my FF and I like to be each others total life. I know that sounds crazy but it''s just us. He has had a horrible life before he met me, and every person in his life screwed him. He has a VERY hard time trusting anyone. I guess our situation is a little different. For the most part I do agree with this list in general relationships, just not mine!

If that makes any sense! haha

I see what your saying, HOH4J, but I also think it''s really healthy to have at least some interests outside each other, even if it''s stuff you do on your own! For example, Kris and I spend most of our time together (partly because we live together), but sometimes even when we''re in the same room, we''ll each be focused on doing our own thing. Having lives of your own doesn''t have to mean going to hang out with other people (although sometimes it''s nice to do that), it can also just mean that you guys have your own interests outside of each other.

 

[ladypirate]

Date: 6/17/2008 4:14:51 PM
Author: sunnyd
Alright ladies, you heard 'em. If you're not doin it all the time, you're not getting married!

Phew! We're safe then!

 

[HeadOverHeels4James]

HAHA We both do have our own interests.......we live together but we both work a lot. All the time we do have we like to spend together and with the Arnie( our puppy)

 

[ladypirate]

Date: 6/17/2008 4:19:00 PM
Author: HeadOverHeels4James
HAHA We both do have our own interests.......we live together but we both work a lot. All the time we do have we like to spend together and with the Arnie( our puppy)

I figured you did--do we get to see puppy pics?

 

[HeadOverHeels4James]

HEHE I''ll have to dig some more up(current ones).... he is 7 1/2 months old now and 45 pounds!!!! IN this picture he is 6 weeks old!!

Awe he is growing up so fast!!

 

[sunnyd]

Date: 6/17/2008 4:16:29 PM
Author: ladypirate

Date: 6/17/2008 4:14:51 PM
Author: sunnyd
Alright ladies, you heard ''em. If you''re not doin it all the time, you''re not getting married!

Phew! We''re safe then!

I''m slacking. Better get on it! LOL, no pun intended...

 

[Anna0499]

Haha...I actually do think that some guys/girls get married to have MORE sex...I know I''d be in the mood more often if it was my husband next to me instead of just my boyfriend.

CUTE DOG! I wish they stayed like that...I have a mini Doxie and a Chihuahua myself so they are small, but nothing is cuter than a puppy...except a baby, of course.

 

[ladypirate]

Date: 6/17/2008 4:24:12 PM
Author: sunnyd

Date: 6/17/2008 4:16:29 PM
Author: ladypirate

Date: 6/17/2008 4:14:51 PM
Author: sunnyd
Alright ladies, you heard 'em. If you're not doin it all the time, you're not getting married!

Phew! We're safe then!

I'm slacking. Better get on it! LOL, no pun intended...

LOL--I found this emoticon in the emoticons thread, and it seems appropriate here:

<-----------SunnyD's BF

 

[sunnyd]

Awww cute puppy!

LOL Anna! My sociology of sex prof in college said that married people actually have more sex than any age group. It''s so convenient to just roll over than having to go through the whole dating ritual, etc.

 

[ladypirate]

Date: 6/17/2008 4:24:09 PM
Author: HeadOverHeels4James
HEHE I''ll have to dig some more up(current ones).... he is 7 1/2 months old now and 45 pounds!!!! IN this picture he is 6 weeks old!!

Awe he is growing up so fast!!

Aww, HOH4J--he is adorable! Kris isn''t a dog guy, but he loves cats, so we''ll be getting a couple once we move. I''m an equal opportunity animal lover--once we own a house, I want a couple of chickens as well!

 

[HeadOverHeels4James]

HEHE Thanks for the compliments on Arnold!!

I''ll try to take some new ones!! He is so cute.... he ears are huge

 

[meresal]

Date: 6/17/2008 4:03:41 PM
Author: Anna0499

Date: 6/17/2008 3:56:25 PM
Author: meresal

Date: 6/17/2008 3:48:08 PM
Author: Lauren8211
I agree with most of it. Men are attracted to confident women, so naturally women who are independent, take care of themselves, and love sex, are going to attract long term mates.

I don''t think these are hard and fast rules, but it all comes back to being confident. Confidence is attractive!

Lauren: I tend to agree. The Independant factor would also explain a little why more men are looking to relationships with older women. Usually more stable; job wise, financially, and sometimes emotionally.

I also think that''s why the marriage age continues to rise. I''m not knocking young marriages (okay maybe I am just a little bit but only really young teenage marriages) but I think marriages between two people who fully know THEMSELVES, combined with the stability factors, probably have a better survival rate.

Do you guys watch that show ''Engaged & Underage''? It''s my guilty pleasure and at times it''s like watching a car wreck...it''s sometimes painful to watch (other times sweet and touching) but I can''t turn the channel!

Anna- I''ve never seen it, but anytime I think about what my life would be like if I was still with my HS boyfriend (he doesn''t get the term sweetheart), I shudder from head to toe. Why can''t we have a surgery that tells us to listen to our parents, bc mine definitely knew BEST!!!
What channel does it come on? My guilty pleasure is the ''My Big Redneck Wedding''. LOL!!! I just can''t believe some of those stories!!!

 

[Anna0499]

Date: 6/17/2008 4:30:12 PM
Author: sunnyd
Awww cute puppy!

LOL Anna! My sociology of sex prof in college said that married people actually have more sex than any age group. It''s so convenient to just roll over than having to go through the whole dating ritual, etc.

Definitely heard that in my Catholic HS classes preaching abstinence (just wait ''til you''re married, it''ll be so much better

)...and while I don''t condone prostitution...having a diamond on my finger would make me more apt to accept advances when I''m tired

I agree with NEL that sometimes opposites attract but for the most part compatibility reigns supreme. I bet some men/women LOVE being the confident one and their SO be unconfident and needing assurance 24/7...probably a dysfunction there but not for me to say...

I saw the Engaged & Underage thread from about a year ago...there was an episode on the other night feeding my insomnia where the girl just kept on telling her BF, "Tell me I''m pretty" "Tell me you love me" blah blah blah...I really wanted to shake the poor guy and tell him to run far far away!

 

[sunnyd]

Date: 6/17/2008 4:31:24 PM
Author: ladypirate

Date: 6/17/2008 4:24:09 PM
Author: HeadOverHeels4James
HEHE I''ll have to dig some more up(current ones).... he is 7 1/2 months old now and 45 pounds!!!! IN this picture he is 6 weeks old!!

Awe he is growing up so fast!!

Aww, HOH4J--he is adorable! Kris isn''t a dog guy, but he loves cats, so we''ll be getting a couple once we move. I''m an equal opportunity animal lover--once we own a house, I want a couple of chickens as well!

Heee look at him run!

 

[Anna0499]

Date: 6/17/2008 4:34:23 PM
Author: meresal

Anna- I''ve never seen it, but anytime I think about what my life would be like if I was still with my HS boyfriend (he doesn''t get the term sweetheart), I shudder from head to toe. Why can''t we have a surgery that tells us to listen to our parents, bc mine definitely knew BEST!!!
What channel does it come on? My guilty pleasure is the ''My Big Redneck Wedding''. LOL!!! I just can''t believe some of those stories!!!

It''s a really fun, don''t-have-to-think-when-you-watch-it "reality" show on MTV chronicling youngsters (usually 21 or younger) who are getting married. There''s usually at least one blwoout fight before the wedding so it''s fun...I''m not sure if they have new episodes coming out right now...I usually catch it on late night when I can''t sleep.

http://www.mtv.com/ontv/dyn/engaged_and_underage/series.jhtml has the showtimes...looks like next viewing is Thursday at 6pm

It''s kind of addictive and much cleaner than MTV''s other "reality" shows.

 

[sunnyd]

Date: 6/17/2008 4:35:20 PM
Author: Anna0499

Date: 6/17/2008 4:30:12 PM
Author: sunnyd
Awww cute puppy!

LOL Anna! My sociology of sex prof in college said that married people actually have more sex than any age group. It''s so convenient to just roll over than having to go through the whole dating ritual, etc.

Definitely heard that in my Catholic HS classes preaching abstinence (just wait ''til you''re married, it''ll be so much better

)...and while I don''t condone prostitution...having a diamond on my finger would make me more apt to accept advances when I''m tired

I agree with NEL that sometimes opposites attract but for the most part compatibility reigns supreme. I bet some men/women LOVE being the confident one and their SO be unconfident and needing assurance 24/7...probably a dysfunction there but not for me to say...

I saw the Engaged & Underage thread from about a year ago...there was an episode on the other night feeding my insomnia where the girl just kept on telling her BF, ''Tell me I''m pretty'' ''Tell me you love me'' blah blah blah...I really wanted to shake the poor guy and tell him to run far far away!

That show is so ridiculous. I wonder if any of them worked out. Speaking of listening to your parents while in high school, on every episode I''ve seen, the parents are not really getting why their 18 year old HAS to get married NOW. And I wouldn''t either. Not to put down young couples, but the stats are what they are for a reason, ya know?

 

[Anna0499]

Date: 6/17/2008 4:42:22 PM
Author: sunnyd

That show is so ridiculous. I wonder if any of them worked out. Speaking of listening to your parents while in high school, on every episode I''ve seen, the parents are not really getting why their 18 year old HAS to get married NOW. And I wouldn''t either. Not to put down young couples, but the stats are what they are for a reason, ya know?

Yeah, I noticed that too...the kids never seem to have a reason either...just that "they love each other." Oh to be so naive and think that means you need to get married that instant and everything will be 100% fairytale. I watched a lesbian one the other night (they were around 19 I believe) and it was different but kind of touching because the father learned to accept his daughter''s sexual orientation. Other than that they were like every other couple, fighting before the wedding and all.

 

[HeadOverHeels4James]

This is one of those shows that makes me comment out loud when I''m watching it!!!!!!

 

[sunnyd]

Date: 6/17/2008 4:46:14 PM
Author: HeadOverHeels4James
This is one of those shows that makes me comment out loud when I''m watching it!!!!!!

Me too! BF always is like uggggghhhh do we have to watch this? Me: Yes. It''s funny.