Let it all hangout -- The Grumpies, whinies, complainies Get It Off Your Chest Thread....

[kgizo]

Selling a home and the buyers are acting like first time home buyers (they are not) and nickel and diming on every little thing in the inspection. It’s really putting me off and giving me a bad feeling about the deal.

 

[tyty333]

Selling a home and the buyers are acting like first time home buyers (they are not) and nickel and diming on every little thing in the inspection. It’s really putting me off and giving me a bad feeling about the deal.

Tell them to take it or leave it! Unless it's a hard to sell house, then you'll have to work with them...drats!

 

[CMN]

I have steam coming out of my ears. I’m too mad to write about it. Strata living can be a PITA (I think this is the equivalent of a condo in the US? or maybe company title if you have that).

 

[diamondringlover]

I have unresolved anger may as well get it off my chest here...I got covid last month for the first time..how did I get it you ask....well (this maybe long) it all started because my sister in law took my father in law out to bars and restaurants (she lives with him to help take care of him)...my SIL has had covid TWICE because of running every were without regard to anyone so she is in her somewhat immune period, father in law is 97 (yes he came out ok thank goodness) he has only had his initial set of vaccines, he refused to get the boosters....the weekend we think he got it she took him out to eat to a restaurant and them again to another bar/restaurant, he has congestive heart failure and should not be eating that trashy food but whatever...so he gets covid, hubby watches after him during the day, he notice dad wasn't feeling great but being in poor health and 97 he didn't think anything of it...well 3 days later hubby gets sick and takes a covid test (hubby is vaccinated and boosted) its positive they finally test father in law he has covid and then hubby graciously shared his covid with our son (also vaccinated and boosted) who has very bad asthma and ended up on mega dosage of prednisone to improve his lung function and then son shared with me (I am vaccinated and boosted) in spite of me doing everything to prevent the spread of it...I was pissed, I missed my grand daughters 3 birthday party...I am still angry, very angry....I don't know how to get past it all and I will be seeing his family for thanksgiving, I don't want to go...this anger I know is uncalled for and stupid but it does not help....I am angry

 

[missy]

I have unresolved anger may as well get it off my chest here...I got covid last month for the first time..how did I get it you ask....well (this maybe long) it all started because my sister in law took my father in law out to bars and restaurants (she lives with him to help take care of him)...my SIL has had covid TWICE because of running every were without regard to anyone so she is in her somewhat immune period, father in law is 97 (yes he came out ok thank goodness) he has only had his initial set of vaccines, he refused to get the boosters....the weekend we think he got it she took him out to eat to a restaurant and them again to another bar/restaurant, he has congestive heart failure and should not be eating that trashy food but whatever...so he gets covid, hubby watches after him during the day, he notice dad wasn't feeling great but being in poor health and 97 he didn't think anything of it...well 3 days later hubby gets sick and takes a covid test (hubby is vaccinated and boosted) its positive they finally test father in law he has covid and then hubby graciously shared his covid with our son (also vaccinated and boosted) who has very bad asthma and ended up on mega dosage of prednisone to improve his lung function and then son shared with me (I am vaccinated and boosted) in spite of me doing everything to prevent the spread of it...I was pissed, I missed my grand daughters 3 birthday party...I am still angry, very angry....I don't know how to get past it all and I will be seeing his family for thanksgiving, I don't want to go...this anger I know is uncalled for and stupid but it does not help....I am angry

I am so sorry. How you are feeling is not stupid and is justified IMO. I totally get it.

I will share what helps me get through my anger about this. We can only control our behavior. No one else's. As my DH likes to remind me when I get upset about others reckless (IMO) actions and behavior. So that is what we do.We control our behavior and actions.

We will not be joining in Thanksgiving with family or friends. My DH and I cannot afford to get Covid. If we do we might not recover well. Not to be dramatic. Just sharing what I know and what my physicians have warned me about. I would most certainly get long covid and I most certainly would suffer lung and maybe liver damage. Due to a genetic condition I have. And my DH is older and has asthma so who knows how he would fare. My point being I cannot control how careful others are but we can certainly control what we do.

You could always zoom Thanksgiving to feel a part of the festivities with loved ones. It isn't a perfect solution but remaining well is paramount (IMO for us) so we aren't visiting in person anywhere this holiday season. I always like to remember perfect is the enemy of good enough. This isn't forever and I want to have future holidays and happy occasions to share with loved ones.

So we remain vigilant this year (as we have for the past two plus years) so we can remain healthy and enjoy future years with our family and friends.

And I remain grateful for all we do have and for all my friends and family who are still here with us. We take things one day at a time and when that is overwhelming one hour at a time.

Sending you gentle hugs and many well wishes for a happy and healthy holiday season.

 

[diamondringlover]

I am so sorry. How you are feeling is not stupid and is justified IMO. I totally get it.

I will share what helps me get through my anger about this. We can only control our behavior. No one else's. As my DH likes to remind me when I get upset about others reckless (IMO) actions and behavior. So that is what we do.We control our behavior and actions.

We will not be joining in Thanksgiving with family or friends. My DH and I cannot afford to get Covid. If we do we might not recover well. Not to be dramatic. Just sharing what I know and what my physicians have warned me about. I would most certainly get long covid and I most certainly would suffer lung and maybe liver damage. Due to a genetic condition I have. And my DH is older and has asthma so who knows how he would fare. My point being I cannot control how careful others are but we can certainly control what we do.

You could always zoom Thanksgiving to feel a part of the festivities with loved ones. It isn't a perfect solution but remaining well is paramount (IMO for us) so we aren't visiting in person anywhere this holiday season. I always like to remember perfect is the enemy of good enough. This isn't forever and I want to have future holidays and happy occasions to share with loved ones.

So we remain vigilant this year (as we have for the past two plus years) so we can remain healthy and enjoy future years with our family and friends.

And I remain grateful for all we do have and for all my friends and family who are still here with us. We take things one day at a time and when that is overwhelming one hour at a time.

Sending you gentle hugs and many well wishes for a happy and healthy holiday season.

Thank you Missy...my oldest son has long haulers covid, him, his wife and my grand daughter got it from her parents...so maybe that is why I am so angry, the careless acts of others effects everyone! I hope you guys remain covid free, it wasn't horrible for me and hubby (not pleasant either though), but listening to my son cough so much brought back flashbacks to many ER visits when he was a younger child. Hubby will not stand still for a zoom visit and I look like a total witch if I dont go with him, they dont really like me anyway and the feelings are mutual, but we do what we have to. Take care of yourself and your hubby you all definitely do not want this...my oldest son has been dealing with longer haulers since January he has been to more doctors this year then has his entire life, he is a healthy 36 year old man and it brought him down to his knees it been horrible to watch and hear what he is going thru, he is finally starting to feel better almost a year later however he does now have a irregular heart rate now and some nerve damage in his hand because of it...

 

[autumngems]

My oldest brother (70), was just diagnosed with esophageal cancer. Awaiting tests and Dr. appt to see what the plan is. He smoked most of his life and has emphysema as well.

 

[Calliecake]

i’m so sorry @autumngems.

 

[VRBeauty]

I’m not going to comment further on this, or respond to comments, because in this case I want to be careful not to get into gossiping, but…

This is a note I received yesterday from one of our Thanksgiving dinner guests, and my reply(ies).



GAAAAAH!

 

[dk168]

Same old...

An ex-gentleman friend had a swipe at me on FB when I posted about not being able to attend a pop up food event by a vendor whose food I tried and liked at an event he helped to organise in the past.

He said I should change my plan and be more flexible.

The event that clashes with the pop up food event happens to be a festive dinner for 7 people for me and 6 others.

He is only of the 6 "others".

When I took this up with the group on FB Messenger to check if the meal is still going ahead, in case he and others had changed their mind, I was told that was just a joke, and everyone else would know it was a joke.

I blew up and asked how I was supposed to know it was yet another of his so-called jokes and blasted him back.

No apologies and I had not expected any to come from him, ever.

Me being overly sensitive and lacking in GSOH, or him being insensitive?

I don't care, as he is an ex for many reasons!

DK

 

[seaurchin]

Yikes to both of the latest posts lol.

I’d tell the prospective guest that there’s really just too much going on in the kitchen that day for her baby food project. Then make her bring a dish as punishment for being annoying.

The ex-gentleman friend has a strange and unfunny sense of humor. I recommend some type of revenge for him too. Perhaps an invitation to a really great event that doesn’t exist haha.

 

[nala]

You would think that after everyone has bent over backwards to show a person kindness for over 6 months, that said person could utter words of gratitude. Instead, said person charges family a convenience charge bc said person is doing them a favor! The ingratitude! And what’s worse, I’m the bad guy for venting about it!!

 

[TooPatient]

First world problem, for sure. I tried to buy a ticket for a country music concert on Ticketmaster. They gave an error code. Bank thought it might be fraud. Let bank know it is valid charge. Still no confirmation. Doesn't show up in my events. But there is a charge on my account. No live person or phone number or anything. Sent request to help and someone will get back to me within "24 to 48 hours" all while I don't know if I do or don't have a ticket. Nonrefundable and expensive as far as my usual concert tickets go so I don't want to just buy another in case. Gah!!!!!!
(Will be first concert since 2019)

 

[TooPatient]

First world problem, for sure. I tried to buy a ticket for a country music concert on Ticketmaster. They gave an error code. Bank thought it might be fraud. Let bank know it is valid charge. Still no confirmation. Doesn't show up in my events. But there is a charge on my account. No live person or phone number or anything. Sent request to help and someone will get back to me within "24 to 48 hours" all while I don't know if I do or don't have a ticket. Nonrefundable and expensive as far as my usual concert tickets go so I don't want to just buy another in case. Gah!!!!!!
(Will be first concert since 2019)

All better! Bank had it corrected before I got to a live person. I even managed to get the same ticket I really wanted. Shouldn't have been so difficult, but everything worked out. Yay!

 

[ItsMainelyYou]

I've decided I'm not going to Thanksgiving tomorrow, I'm staying home with my younger teen who is ill with a nasty cold- I won't risk it. Honestly, it's a relief, I love my DH's family but with my intestinal issues it's always stressful and not that great of a time. It's just anxiety riddled. The amount of Immodium I have to take makes the entire rest of the week awful. It really does a number. If I don't eat, it's judged. If I do and have an episode, it's marked. And it's happening in front of 20-30 people. The family will be upset. I hope not, but it isn't the first time I've dipped. If one doesn't have IBS/D or Colitis etc. it's hard understand the issues that come with that- and they aren't the kind who don't show up, even when mildly ill. They're all about toughing it out. Plus, the kid is sick and there will be ages 2-80+. I'm just not doing it.
I love them but I just can't. I'm just writing this to steel against the likely unspoken recriminations and guilt I always have over it.

 

[seaurchin]

Good for you, It'sMainelyYou, and please enjoy a pleasant, stress-free day.

I don't know why anyone would be judgey about you staying home with your ill teenager rather than possibly carrying the illness to the rest of the family, not to mention your child otherwise having to spend Thanksgiving alone.

OR why anyone would be judgey about what you eat or don't eat, especially when they know you have a medical condition. You shouldn't have to be anxious and physically suffer just to avoid recrimination about not being "tough enough" for their approval. Yikes. They are the ones who should feel guilty.

 

[missy]

Good for you, It'sMainelyYou, and please enjoy a pleasant, stress-free day.

I don't know why anyone would be judgey about you staying home with your ill teenager rather than possibly carrying the illness to the rest of the family, not to mention your child otherwise having to spend Thanksgiving alone.

OR why anyone would be judgey about what you eat or don't eat, especially when they know you have a medical condition. You shouldn't have to be anxious and physically suffer just to avoid recrimination about not being "tough enough" for their approval. Yikes. They are the ones who should feel guilty.

Because people can suck big time that is why. And again why I prefer animals to many (most?) people, Animals don't judge and animals accept us exactly as we are. We can learn a lot from animals

Enjoy your Thanksgiving @ItsMainelyYou and @seaurchin and everyone else. Do it your way and enjoy and be well

 

[ItsMainelyYou]

I love you guys, I mean it, all of my PS friends. I'm thankful for all of you.
I know I can seem glib, flippant or jokey much of the time, but underneath it- it matters.
*I don't want to give the wrong impression, they're pretty great and they mean well, just have a hard time understanding the nature of my(what can look to be completely arbitrary from the outside)inflammatory issues.

It's Cosmic Space Turkey Day, wherever you are, I hope it all comes out rainbow!

 

[seaurchin]

I get what you're saying but if it helps, tbh when you said you have eating issues because of IBS, I clearly understood that "this is someone whose dietary needs are different and variable" without having to hear another word, and I barely even know what IBS is. JMHO. Hope your day was pleasant and that your kid feels better.

 

[MamaBee]

I just told my husband I’m not making any more turkeys..ever..I don’t like turkey..and I’ve wrestled with my last one. It’s pick up next year. I’ll set the table..do appetizers..but I’m done cooking turkeys.

 

[seaurchin]

Why are all the non-cow shoes and purses butt-ugly and cheap looking?

I finally just ordered the least offensive/least noticeable non-leather purse after searching online for over two hours. I was not even concerned about prices. Cows are like the worst for the planet so I deserve cute purses and shoes for my efforts, right?

 

[mellowyellowgirl]

I just told my husband I’m not making any more turkeys..ever..I don’t like turkey..and I’ve wrestled with my last one. It’s pick up next year. I’ll set the table..do appetizers..but I’m done cooking turkeys.

This was me one Christmas!!! I'd had enough and no one likes Turkey that much anyway!!!!

I went all Asian food and the guests loved it!!!! We went mainly Asian the years after that!

 

[pearlsngems]

I just told my husband I’m not making any more turkeys..ever..I don’t like turkey..and I’ve wrestled with my last one. It’s pick up next year. I’ll set the table..do appetizers..but I’m done cooking turkeys.

My daughter told me Wednesday evening that she doesn't like turkey-- this was news to me! I guess at some point over the years her tastes changed. I don't like turkey much myself, but was making it all these years for her sake and my husband's.

That was it! I told them both that this would be the last year I roast a turkey at Thanksgiving. After a short discussion about alternatives, we decided we'll have roast leg of lamb instead.

 

[dk168]

A member of the charity organisation who joined about a couple of weeks later than I did, supposed to be well-versed in organising events etc. etc., according to her own words.

I have had doubts about her right from the start, as she came across as too full of herself.

I tried, I have really tried to warm to her; however, I just can't, and my hunch turned out to be correct.

She has very minimal IT skills which is kind of crucial in this day and age, and had made the wrong assumptions more than once.

She may be very good at bossing people about to get things done; however, she does not always know what needs to be done, and does not ask questions to obtain further information or clarification etc...

She winds up other members too, and keeps threatening to leave as she does not like the way things are done.

Very tiresome.

DK

 

[seaurchin]

I used to get the largest turkey I could find and an extra for the freezer. It is so economical for a family to buy them cheaply at the holidays and deep freeze the leftovers too, plus make turkey soup. But now I just get boneless turkey breasts, which are so much simpler. Less cooking time and easy to slice.

 

[MamaBee]

I used to get the largest turkey I could find and an extra for the freezer. It is so economical for a family to buy them cheaply at the holidays and deep freeze the leftovers too, plus make turkey soup. But now I just get boneless turkey breasts, which are so much simpler. Less cooking time and easy to slice.

I did the same thing when I was younger. I’ve just made too many turkeys..some of which just wouldn’t behave in the oven. It’s too much trouble to make something that gives me stress. It was an awful experience yesterday. I would consider making a turkey breast but my 97 year old mom won’t eat white meat. She’s the only one that likes dark meat..sigh..

 

[pearlsngems]

I stopped buying frozen birds some 5 years ago and instead pre-ordered fresh ones from a market that buys them from a local farm. With a fresh bird you don't have to encumber your fridge for a week while thawing, and you don't have to worry about that huge frozen lump in the cavity that somehow never quite defrosts.

I also began butterflying /spatchcocking the turkey. A 12 lb. bird thus prepared fits neatly into a rectangular foil steam table type pan, of dimensions 21 x 13 x 3 Inches, (doubled for strength). Spatchcocking the bird reduces roasting time considerably. A 12 lb. bird is done in 1.5 to 2 hours (the breast takes a little longer than the legs and wings.)

Here's how I did it: Remove legs and wings, cut out the backbone (using kitchen shears and/or meat cleaver), break breastbone so the breast lies flat, and arrange all in the pan-- breast in the middle, legs and wings to the left and right. I like to loosen the breast skin with my fingers and rub some cold butter under it so that it self-bastes as it cooks.
Set aside the breastbone and giblets and neck along with the carcass after slicing, to make soup or stock later. They freeze well.

Cover only the breast with a shaped piece of aluminum foil. Roast at 350º. After 30 minutes remove the foil from the breast and keep roasting until done. If the wings and legs are done first, you can remove them easily from the pan and just keep roasting the breast until it, too, is done.

I didn't used to mind this process-- it really isn't hard, and produces great results-- but I have arthritis in my basal thumb joints that is worsening. I have been changing how I do chores (kitchen and otherwise) to minimize my thumb joint pain. There is a brace that helps but it's hard to do wet kinds of jobs with the brace on. Turkey prep is one of the jobs I will be happy to dispense with. And finding out my daughter didn't even like turkey anymore was the final straw.

 

[TooPatient]

I'm the oddball, it seems. I LOVE roasting whole turkeys this time of year. Turkey number two is going in now, actually! I've been a bit sad to not have had the time to cook them this year like I usually do. Most years, I will have already done at least three whole turkeys before Thanksgiving then the day of turkey for my extended family and the day after turkey for just us at home.

 

[YadaYadaYada]

This is actually rather amusing to me, more so than a vent.

We were at DH’s cousin’s house for dessert on Thanksgiving. Cousin’s mother, Mama L, is not really a nice person, obviously miserable and likes to make cutting comments. They were talking about going on the Essex steam train for Christmas and DH expressed interest in bringing the kids next year. So Mama L just had to put her two cents in “oh are you sure? It’s very expensive….$55 a ticket”. Mind you her and her kids and grandkids go every single year, she seems to think we don’t go because we can’t afford it apparently.

Today cousin calls because four people are now sick and can’t go, she is left holding the bag for the tickets and asked if we wanted to buy them. Ah it will be very satisfying to see Mama L tomorrow

 

[seaurchin]

What I forgot about when living in a house all those years... We're in an apartment right now and today's been wild. Some guy was screaming his fool head off earlier like he was being beaten to death and we were trying to decide if we should call 9-1-1. Fortunately, then he started screaming just as loud but in a happy way and we realized he was probably just drunk and watching the ball game.

Now some other guy keeps yelling that someone is a "f***ing b****." I'm halfway hoping I'll hear a big thump over there so I'll have cause to call the police and have them check on whoever he is speaking to like that. Or maybe he's watching a ballgame too, come to think of it, because I do not hear any voice answering him.

I don't miss the big extended family holidays lol. I had forgotten how there always seems to be that one person who just has to ruin everything.