vc10um
Ideal_Rock
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The LIW Small Talk Thread
- Thread starter Ali
- Start date
Lauren8211
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I work hard on that.Date: 2/9/2010 1:48:32 PM
Author: winelover23
Again w/ the genius ideas! You blow my mind Elle.Date: 2/9/2010 1:47:49 PM
Author: elledizzy5
You break mine, I break yours?Date: 2/9/2010 1:42:57 PM
Author: winelover23
And me!Date: 2/9/2010 1:40:06 PM
Author: elledizzy5
Why is EVERYONE getting a snow day but me?????
I''m thinking of breaking my arm or something.
Squirrly
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Squirrly
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It is a film analysis paper about Pan''s Labyrinth connecting three of the characters (Ofelia, Captain Vidal, the faun) to Jungian archetypes (hero, fool, wise old man). The main point I am trying to make is that the theme of the movie is ambiguity and the characters can be seen very differently depending on how you choose to see the story.Date: 2/9/2010 2:53:15 PM
Author: Squirrly
i should be emailing people but i accidentally left my bag o stuff at work last night, so i''m just hanging out until my ensemble. what''s this paper over?
Ofelia = Hero or Child
Vidal = Fool or Hero
Faun = Wise Old Man or Trickster
jcarlylew
Ideal_Rock
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wow! that sounds really interesting! i love that movie too. so... I kinda want to read your paper nowDate: 2/9/2010 2:59:00 PM
Author: TooPatient
It is a film analysis paper about Pan''s Labyrinth connecting three of the characters (Ofelia, Captain Vidal, the faun) to Jungian archetypes (hero, fool, wise old man). The main point I am trying to make is that the theme of the movie is ambiguity and the characters can be seen very differently depending on how you choose to see the story.Date: 2/9/2010 2:53:15 PM
Author: Squirrly
i should be emailing people but i accidentally left my bag o stuff at work last night, so i''m just hanging out until my ensemble. what''s this paper over?
Ofelia = Hero or Child
Vidal = Fool or Hero
Faun = Wise Old Man or Trickster
I once did a lit paper on the differences between traditional chinese kung fu movies vs "new age" american kung fu movies. However i doubt my paper was not nearly as thoughtful as yours!
jcarlylew
Ideal_Rock
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i suggest breaking legs/feet. More of an excuse not to moveDate: 2/9/2010 2:00:19 PM
Author: elledizzy5
I work hard on that.Date: 2/9/2010 1:48:32 PM
Author: winelover23
Again w/ the genius ideas! You blow my mind Elle.Date: 2/9/2010 1:47:49 PM
Author: elledizzy5
You break mine, I break yours?Date: 2/9/2010 1:42:57 PM
Author: winelover23
And me!Date: 2/9/2010 1:40:06 PM
Author: elledizzy5
Why is EVERYONE getting a snow day but me?????
I''m thinking of breaking my arm or something.
Squirrly
Brilliant_Rock
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I''m still in the process of editing, but here it is:
Things Are Not What They Seem
The viewer’s perception of the characters in Pan’s Labyrinth greatly affects the Jungian archetypes those characters portray. Writer and director Guillermo del Toro provided great detail, but left the story ambiguous to allow viewers the ability to see the story in many shades of gray.
In one of those shades, Ofelia is the hero. Snider says that the hero is “…carried away and raised by foster parents. We know little or nothing of his childhood, but when he reaches manhood he returns to his future kingdom.” (Snider) Ofelia is a ten year old girl who moves with her pregnant mother to Navarra to be with Ofelia’s new stepfather. On the way, Ofelia meets a fairy in the woods who leads her into an ancient labyrinth where she meets a faun. The faun reveals that she is the daughter of the king and queen of another world. To return to this other world she must complete three tasks from the book of instructions the faun gives her.
Ofelia the Hero could just as easily be Ofelia the Child. She wanders around the forest having conversations with imaginary creatures with no thought of how her behaviors affect the people around her. Maybe worse is the thought that she wanders around having conversations with strangers in secluded places after sneaking away from her mother. Ofelia places a plant in milk under her mother’s bed where it can turn rancid just because the faun told her to. These behaviors all seem very child-like.
The faun’s archetype is the Wise Old Man “…who guides him or her (or, conversely, leads him or her astray).” (Snider) Throughout the movie, he guides Ofelia in the tasks she needs to complete before she can return home to the other world. After she successfully completes the first task of killing the giant toad, the faun is upset that the second task is not done promptly. To assist her, the faun brings a mandrake root to Ofelia and instructs her to place it under her mother’s bed to make her well again. Her mother’s fever is reduced allowing Ofelia to focus on completing her second task. For her second task, Ofelia must bring back the dagger that is guarded by the pale monster with eyes in his hands. Before leaving for this task, Ofelia is warned by the faun that she must not eat or drink anything but she is unable to resist the temptation of the food-covered table and eats a few of the grapes. When Ofelia returns with the dagger, the faun angrily informs her that she will not be allowed to return to the other world.
The Wise Old Man faun can also be seen as the Trickster. He sent one of his pet fairies to lead Ofelia, a child who believes fairies are kind and good, into the labyrinth in the middle of the night. He then tells her a story about how she is a princess and her real parents, the king and queen, miss her and are waiting for her to come back to them. All she has to do is follow his directions and she can leave the fighting behind to go live in a big palace. He manipulates a little girl with an active imagination with the intention of killing her baby brother -- and he would have succeeded if Captain Vidal had not shown up and saved his son.
Captain Vidal is the Fool of this movie. He is the “shadow figure distressed by some unconscious lack of power, often driven by greed or an inordinate desire for fame… who projects his or her inadequacies against scapegoats...” (Snider) The Captain is a Fascist officer who is supposed to get rid of the rebels hiding in the forest. He is a sadistic man who shoots or tortures the people who displease him. Vidal is certain his new wife’s baby will be the son that will carry on his name. The Captain has a conversation with his doctor and makes it clear that his unborn son is to be saved even if it means the death of his wife. Ofelia overhears this conversation and is determined to save her baby brother after Carmen dies giving birth to him.
The faun, a very generous Wise Old Man, comes back to give Ofelia a last chance to get back to her real home with the king and queen. Ofelia must complete the third task without question – she must bring her baby brother to the labyrinth. To do this, she drugs the captain and takes her brother from his room. The faun wants Ofelia to give her baby brother to him so that he can “spill the blood of an innocent” (Pan’s Labyrinth) so the portal to the other world will open. Here, the faun – The Wise Old Man -- must lead Ofelia astray and give her the chance to prove herself. Ofelia refuses to sacrifice her brother. Captain Vidal appears in the labyrinth and shoots Ofelia. She falls to the ground bleeding. Ofelia is now the scapegoat. The captain takes his son from her arms and leaves as Ofelia lays on the ground bleeding.
Viewed another way, Captain Vidal might be the Hero and not the Fool. He is a patriotic person who is serving his country in the military and performing his difficult duties the best he can manage. The war in the rest of Spain has already been over for years and he is facing a bunch of rebels who won’t face reality. The cruelty and torture we see is his way of making things unpleasant for the rebels so that they will give up fighting and the people can rebuild and live in peace. Until then, he protects the available supplies and gives food and medicine to the people who need it. When he chooses to save the baby’s life rather than his wife’s, he may know that she could not live with herself if her child died. Ofelia takes his son from him and he finds her holding his baby in the middle of a large, crumbling labyrinth. She is arguing with herself next to a large hole. Captain Vidal acts quickly to save his son rather than letting Ofelia have the chance to harm him.
When Captain Vidal reaches the exit of the labyrinth he finds a group of rebels waiting for him. He begs them to tell his son about how he carried out his duties and about the watch that had belonged to his father, the child’s grandfather. One of the rebels, holding the baby, tells Vidal that the child will never know who his father was. Captain Vidal is shot and dies knowing that his family name will not be carried on and he will be forgotten – a painful fate for a Fool. As Ofelia dies, the viewer sees her walking into the other world. The king and queen are there to welcome her. The faun bows. Ofelia, the Hero, is home.
Ofelia, Captain Vidal, the faun, and all of the other characters in Pan’s Labyrinth are like real people in real life. They are neither all good nor all bad since, like real people, they each have multiple archetypes affecting their actions. There are clues within the story to guide how the viewer should see the characters, but those clues are intentionally ambiguous. Nothing in this story is black and white. Guillermo del Toro leaves it up to the viewer to decide who the characters really are.
Pan’s Labyrinth Official Movie Site. http://www.panslabyrinth.com/
Things Are Not What They Seem
The viewer’s perception of the characters in Pan’s Labyrinth greatly affects the Jungian archetypes those characters portray. Writer and director Guillermo del Toro provided great detail, but left the story ambiguous to allow viewers the ability to see the story in many shades of gray.
In one of those shades, Ofelia is the hero. Snider says that the hero is “…carried away and raised by foster parents. We know little or nothing of his childhood, but when he reaches manhood he returns to his future kingdom.” (Snider) Ofelia is a ten year old girl who moves with her pregnant mother to Navarra to be with Ofelia’s new stepfather. On the way, Ofelia meets a fairy in the woods who leads her into an ancient labyrinth where she meets a faun. The faun reveals that she is the daughter of the king and queen of another world. To return to this other world she must complete three tasks from the book of instructions the faun gives her.
Ofelia the Hero could just as easily be Ofelia the Child. She wanders around the forest having conversations with imaginary creatures with no thought of how her behaviors affect the people around her. Maybe worse is the thought that she wanders around having conversations with strangers in secluded places after sneaking away from her mother. Ofelia places a plant in milk under her mother’s bed where it can turn rancid just because the faun told her to. These behaviors all seem very child-like.
The faun’s archetype is the Wise Old Man “…who guides him or her (or, conversely, leads him or her astray).” (Snider) Throughout the movie, he guides Ofelia in the tasks she needs to complete before she can return home to the other world. After she successfully completes the first task of killing the giant toad, the faun is upset that the second task is not done promptly. To assist her, the faun brings a mandrake root to Ofelia and instructs her to place it under her mother’s bed to make her well again. Her mother’s fever is reduced allowing Ofelia to focus on completing her second task. For her second task, Ofelia must bring back the dagger that is guarded by the pale monster with eyes in his hands. Before leaving for this task, Ofelia is warned by the faun that she must not eat or drink anything but she is unable to resist the temptation of the food-covered table and eats a few of the grapes. When Ofelia returns with the dagger, the faun angrily informs her that she will not be allowed to return to the other world.
The Wise Old Man faun can also be seen as the Trickster. He sent one of his pet fairies to lead Ofelia, a child who believes fairies are kind and good, into the labyrinth in the middle of the night. He then tells her a story about how she is a princess and her real parents, the king and queen, miss her and are waiting for her to come back to them. All she has to do is follow his directions and she can leave the fighting behind to go live in a big palace. He manipulates a little girl with an active imagination with the intention of killing her baby brother -- and he would have succeeded if Captain Vidal had not shown up and saved his son.
Captain Vidal is the Fool of this movie. He is the “shadow figure distressed by some unconscious lack of power, often driven by greed or an inordinate desire for fame… who projects his or her inadequacies against scapegoats...” (Snider) The Captain is a Fascist officer who is supposed to get rid of the rebels hiding in the forest. He is a sadistic man who shoots or tortures the people who displease him. Vidal is certain his new wife’s baby will be the son that will carry on his name. The Captain has a conversation with his doctor and makes it clear that his unborn son is to be saved even if it means the death of his wife. Ofelia overhears this conversation and is determined to save her baby brother after Carmen dies giving birth to him.
The faun, a very generous Wise Old Man, comes back to give Ofelia a last chance to get back to her real home with the king and queen. Ofelia must complete the third task without question – she must bring her baby brother to the labyrinth. To do this, she drugs the captain and takes her brother from his room. The faun wants Ofelia to give her baby brother to him so that he can “spill the blood of an innocent” (Pan’s Labyrinth) so the portal to the other world will open. Here, the faun – The Wise Old Man -- must lead Ofelia astray and give her the chance to prove herself. Ofelia refuses to sacrifice her brother. Captain Vidal appears in the labyrinth and shoots Ofelia. She falls to the ground bleeding. Ofelia is now the scapegoat. The captain takes his son from her arms and leaves as Ofelia lays on the ground bleeding.
Viewed another way, Captain Vidal might be the Hero and not the Fool. He is a patriotic person who is serving his country in the military and performing his difficult duties the best he can manage. The war in the rest of Spain has already been over for years and he is facing a bunch of rebels who won’t face reality. The cruelty and torture we see is his way of making things unpleasant for the rebels so that they will give up fighting and the people can rebuild and live in peace. Until then, he protects the available supplies and gives food and medicine to the people who need it. When he chooses to save the baby’s life rather than his wife’s, he may know that she could not live with herself if her child died. Ofelia takes his son from him and he finds her holding his baby in the middle of a large, crumbling labyrinth. She is arguing with herself next to a large hole. Captain Vidal acts quickly to save his son rather than letting Ofelia have the chance to harm him.
When Captain Vidal reaches the exit of the labyrinth he finds a group of rebels waiting for him. He begs them to tell his son about how he carried out his duties and about the watch that had belonged to his father, the child’s grandfather. One of the rebels, holding the baby, tells Vidal that the child will never know who his father was. Captain Vidal is shot and dies knowing that his family name will not be carried on and he will be forgotten – a painful fate for a Fool. As Ofelia dies, the viewer sees her walking into the other world. The king and queen are there to welcome her. The faun bows. Ofelia, the Hero, is home.
Ofelia, Captain Vidal, the faun, and all of the other characters in Pan’s Labyrinth are like real people in real life. They are neither all good nor all bad since, like real people, they each have multiple archetypes affecting their actions. There are clues within the story to guide how the viewer should see the characters, but those clues are intentionally ambiguous. Nothing in this story is black and white. Guillermo del Toro leaves it up to the viewer to decide who the characters really are.
Works cited:
Pan’s Labyrinth. Guillermo del Toro. New Line Home Video. 2007.
A Brief Outline of Jungian Psychology. Clifton Snider. http://csulb.edu/~csnider/jungian.outline.html
Pan’s Labyrinth Official Movie Site. http://www.panslabyrinth.com/
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Any suggestions about the paper would be welcome.
I''ve had it reviewed by three different people and have gotten three very different sets of suggestions. (One says it is perfect but wants a slightly longer conclusion, the second gave very specific suggestions and the draft posted has incorporated many of them, the third has essentially suggested tossing it and starting over.
I''m working on more revisions, but don''t want to start from scratch on a paper (1 of the 3 major papers of the quarter) that is due tomorrow.
I''ve had it reviewed by three different people and have gotten three very different sets of suggestions. (One says it is perfect but wants a slightly longer conclusion, the second gave very specific suggestions and the draft posted has incorporated many of them, the third has essentially suggested tossing it and starting over.
I''m working on more revisions, but don''t want to start from scratch on a paper (1 of the 3 major papers of the quarter) that is due tomorrow.
jcarlylew
Ideal_Rock
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Squirrly
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jcarlylew
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Squirrly
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ladypirate
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We just found out today that some friends of ours are getting divorced.
He''s supposed to be a groomsman for the wedding and their daughter is our flower girl. I''m so sad for them right now and especially for their daughter. We knew they were having problems but we didn''t expect it to come to this.
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That is so sad.Date: 2/9/2010 3:54:36 PM
Author: ladypirate
We just found out today that some friends of ours are getting divorced.He''s supposed to be a groomsman for the wedding and their daughter is our flower girl. I''m so sad for them right now and especially for their daughter. We knew they were having problems but we didn''t expect it to come to this.
winelover23
Ideal_Rock
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Wife that is so sad. Divorce is just awful but hopefully it will end up being a good thing for them.Date: 2/9/2010 3:54:36 PM
Author: ladypirate
We just found out today that some friends of ours are getting divorced.He''s supposed to be a groomsman for the wedding and their daughter is our flower girl. I''m so sad for them right now and especially for their daughter. We knew they were having problems but we didn''t expect it to come to this.
Lauren8211
Super_Ideal_Rock
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Oh, LP! That is awful news!Date: 2/9/2010 3:54:36 PM
Author: ladypirate
We just found out today that some friends of ours are getting divorced.He''s supposed to be a groomsman for the wedding and their daughter is our flower girl. I''m so sad for them right now and especially for their daughter. We knew they were having problems but we didn''t expect it to come to this.
How long have they been married?
I never like to hear that people are divorcing. It''s just too sad.
Squirrly
Brilliant_Rock
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that sucks!Date: 2/9/2010 3:54:36 PM
Author: ladypirate
We just found out today that some friends of ours are getting divorced.He's supposed to be a groomsman for the wedding and their daughter is our flower girl. I'm so sad for them right now and especially for their daughter. We knew they were having problems but we didn't expect it to come to this.
ETA: sorry, best i could think to say, but i probably should've said how sad.
ladypirate
Ideal_Rock
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Date: 2/9/2010 4:00:20 PM
Author: elledizzy5
Date: 2/9/2010 3:54:36 PM
Author: ladypirate
We just found out today that some friends of ours are getting divorced.He''s supposed to be a groomsman for the wedding and their daughter is our flower girl. I''m so sad for them right now and especially for their daughter. We knew they were having problems but we didn''t expect it to come to this.
Oh, LP! That is awful news!
How long have they been married?
I never like to hear that people are divorcing. It''s just too sad.
They''ve been married for 6 years and were together for an additional 3 or 4 years before that. He is especially broken up about it because she was the one initiating and serving the papers. I understand it from her point of view as well but it is really hard to see him so heartbroken. He was a stay at home dad and so he has now moved back in with his parents and started looking for work.
Lauren8211
Super_Ideal_Rock
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Ouch. What a blow to the ego. Was there any sort of drama, or did it just not work out? "Run it''s course" sort of thing?Date: 2/9/2010 4:05:08 PM
Author: ladypirate
Date: 2/9/2010 4:00:20 PM
Author: elledizzy5
Date: 2/9/2010 3:54:36 PM
Author: ladypirate
We just found out today that some friends of ours are getting divorced.He''s supposed to be a groomsman for the wedding and their daughter is our flower girl. I''m so sad for them right now and especially for their daughter. We knew they were having problems but we didn''t expect it to come to this.
Oh, LP! That is awful news!
How long have they been married?
I never like to hear that people are divorcing. It''s just too sad.
They''ve been married for 6 years and were together for an additional 3 or 4 years before that. He is especially broken up about it because she was the one initiating and serving the papers. I understand it from her point of view as well but it is really hard to see him so heartbroken. He was a stay at home dad and so he has now moved back in with his parents and started looking for work.
vc10um
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Lauren8211
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ladypirate
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Date: 2/9/2010 4:07:29 PM
Author: elledizzy5
Date: 2/9/2010 4:05:08 PM
Author: ladypirate
Date: 2/9/2010 4:00:20 PM
Author: elledizzy5
Date: 2/9/2010 3:54:36 PM
Author: ladypirate
We just found out today that some friends of ours are getting divorced.He''s supposed to be a groomsman for the wedding and their daughter is our flower girl. I''m so sad for them right now and especially for their daughter. We knew they were having problems but we didn''t expect it to come to this.
Oh, LP! That is awful news!
How long have they been married?
I never like to hear that people are divorcing. It''s just too sad.
They''ve been married for 6 years and were together for an additional 3 or 4 years before that. He is especially broken up about it because she was the one initiating and serving the papers. I understand it from her point of view as well but it is really hard to see him so heartbroken. He was a stay at home dad and so he has now moved back in with his parents and started looking for work.
Ouch. What a blow to the ego. Was there any sort of drama, or did it just not work out? ''Run it''s course'' sort of thing?
They''ve been having trouble for a while. He had some bad habits in the past (playing video games all the time, smoking pot, eating too much, not exercising enough) and had gained a considerable amount of weight which was a source of contention (she''s a nurse and was really concerned about their daughter being brought up around unhealthy habits). She had gotten really into nutrition and exercise (she''s done several triathalons over the last year or so). He gave up the pot smoking and cut back on his video game playing (to around 10 hours a week down from much more) but it still bothered her. I guess recently as a last ditch effort he gave up video games all together and started dieting and exercising but it was too little too late. She apparently told him she was no longer in love with him and didn''t think she could be again. We saw them in October and there was some tension between them but we didn''t know it was that bad. I just feel so bad for their daughter.
winelover23
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This is why the woman always loses all the friends because they are usually the moving party therefore the bad guy. The guy is left heartbroken so everyone feels sorry for him. It takes two to make a marriage fail though.Date: 2/9/2010 4:05:08 PM
Author: ladypirate
Date: 2/9/2010 4:00:20 PM
Author: elledizzy5
Date: 2/9/2010 3:54:36 PM
Author: ladypirate
We just found out today that some friends of ours are getting divorced.He''s supposed to be a groomsman for the wedding and their daughter is our flower girl. I''m so sad for them right now and especially for their daughter. We knew they were having problems but we didn''t expect it to come to this.
Oh, LP! That is awful news!
How long have they been married?
I never like to hear that people are divorcing. It''s just too sad.
They''ve been married for 6 years and were together for an additional 3 or 4 years before that. He is especially broken up about it because she was the one initiating and serving the papers. I understand it from her point of view as well but it is really hard to see him so heartbroken. He was a stay at home dad and so he has now moved back in with his parents and started looking for work.
Wow can you tell I still have some crap to get over?
Lauren8211
Super_Ideal_Rock
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That''s just a crappy situation. I mean, I assume he was that way before they got married, so I''m wondering why she married him expecting to change him. I don''t know, maybe she just thought she could live with it and then realized when her daughter came into the picture that she couldn''t.Date: 2/9/2010 4:12:43 PM
Author: ladypirate
Date: 2/9/2010 4:07:29 PM
Author: elledizzy5
Date: 2/9/2010 4:05:08 PM
Author: ladypirate
Date: 2/9/2010 4:00:20 PM
Author: elledizzy5
Date: 2/9/2010 3:54:36 PM
Author: ladypirate
We just found out today that some friends of ours are getting divorced.He''s supposed to be a groomsman for the wedding and their daughter is our flower girl. I''m so sad for them right now and especially for their daughter. We knew they were having problems but we didn''t expect it to come to this.
Oh, LP! That is awful news!
How long have they been married?
I never like to hear that people are divorcing. It''s just too sad.
They''ve been married for 6 years and were together for an additional 3 or 4 years before that. He is especially broken up about it because she was the one initiating and serving the papers. I understand it from her point of view as well but it is really hard to see him so heartbroken. He was a stay at home dad and so he has now moved back in with his parents and started looking for work.
Ouch. What a blow to the ego. Was there any sort of drama, or did it just not work out? ''Run it''s course'' sort of thing?
They''ve been having trouble for a while. He had some bad habits in the past (playing video games all the time, smoking pot, eating too much, not exercising enough) and had gained a considerable amount of weight which was a source of contention (she''s a nurse and was really concerned about their daughter being brought up around unhealthy habits). She had gotten really into nutrition and exercise (she''s done several triathalons over the last year or so). He gave up the pot smoking and cut back on his video game playing (to around 10 hours a week down from much more) but it still bothered her. I guess recently as a last ditch effort he gave up video games all together and started dieting and exercising but it was too little too late. She apparently told him she was no longer in love with him and didn''t think she could be again. We saw them in October and there was some tension between them but we didn''t know it was that bad. I just feel so bad for their daughter.
Either way, it''s really sad that it turned out that way. The daughter will get through it and she will be OK. As long as both parents love her and make an effort to be in her life as much as possible, she will do wonderfully. Of course, the transition will be hard. It''s never easy watching your family break apart.
ladypirate
Ideal_Rock
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Date: 2/9/2010 4:17:30 PM
Author: winelover23
This is why the woman always loses all the friends because they are usually the moving party therefore the bad guy. The guy is left heartbroken so everyone feels sorry for him. It takes two to make a marriage fail though.Date: 2/9/2010 4:05:08 PM
Author: ladypirate
Date: 2/9/2010 4:00:20 PM
Author: elledizzy5
Date: 2/9/2010 3:54:36 PM
Author: ladypirate
We just found out today that some friends of ours are getting divorced.He''s supposed to be a groomsman for the wedding and their daughter is our flower girl. I''m so sad for them right now and especially for their daughter. We knew they were having problems but we didn''t expect it to come to this.
Oh, LP! That is awful news!
How long have they been married?
I never like to hear that people are divorcing. It''s just too sad.
They''ve been married for 6 years and were together for an additional 3 or 4 years before that. He is especially broken up about it because she was the one initiating and serving the papers. I understand it from her point of view as well but it is really hard to see him so heartbroken. He was a stay at home dad and so he has now moved back in with his parents and started looking for work.
Wow can you tell I still have some crap to get over?
Aww, WL, I don''t blame her at all! It''s just a hard situation because it''s going to be hard for him to get back on his feet since she was the "provider" so to speak. If anything, though, he''s the one who didn''t put the effort in. I feel bad for everyone involved.
ladypirate
Ideal_Rock
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- Jul 30, 2007
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Date: 2/9/2010 4:20:42 PM
Author: elledizzy5
Date: 2/9/2010 4:12:43 PM
Author: ladypirate
Date: 2/9/2010 4:07:29 PM
Author: elledizzy5
Date: 2/9/2010 4:05:08 PM
Author: ladypirate
Date: 2/9/2010 4:00:20 PM
Author: elledizzy5
Date: 2/9/2010 3:54:36 PM
Author: ladypirate
We just found out today that some friends of ours are getting divorced.He''s supposed to be a groomsman for the wedding and their daughter is our flower girl. I''m so sad for them right now and especially for their daughter. We knew they were having problems but we didn''t expect it to come to this.
Oh, LP! That is awful news!
How long have they been married?
I never like to hear that people are divorcing. It''s just too sad.
They''ve been married for 6 years and were together for an additional 3 or 4 years before that. He is especially broken up about it because she was the one initiating and serving the papers. I understand it from her point of view as well but it is really hard to see him so heartbroken. He was a stay at home dad and so he has now moved back in with his parents and started looking for work.
Ouch. What a blow to the ego. Was there any sort of drama, or did it just not work out? ''Run it''s course'' sort of thing?
They''ve been having trouble for a while. He had some bad habits in the past (playing video games all the time, smoking pot, eating too much, not exercising enough) and had gained a considerable amount of weight which was a source of contention (she''s a nurse and was really concerned about their daughter being brought up around unhealthy habits). She had gotten really into nutrition and exercise (she''s done several triathalons over the last year or so). He gave up the pot smoking and cut back on his video game playing (to around 10 hours a week down from much more) but it still bothered her. I guess recently as a last ditch effort he gave up video games all together and started dieting and exercising but it was too little too late. She apparently told him she was no longer in love with him and didn''t think she could be again. We saw them in October and there was some tension between them but we didn''t know it was that bad. I just feel so bad for their daughter.
That''s just a crappy situation. I mean, I assume he was that way before they got married, so I''m wondering why she married him expecting to change him. I don''t know, maybe she just thought she could live with it and then realized when her daughter came into the picture that she couldn''t.
Either way, it''s really sad that it turned out that way. The daughter will get through it and she will be OK. As long as both parents love her and make an effort to be in her life as much as possible, she will do wonderfully. Of course, the transition will be hard. It''s never easy watching your family break apart.
Well, he was to some extent but he has probably gained 100 pounds since they got married (and he was heavy then). I think part of it was also that she wanted another child and he didn''t. Even though he loved their daughter, she sort of pressured him into having a kid (or more accurately bargained with him. He got a new tv out of it).
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