Weird Little RULEZZZZZ

[rainbowtrout]

Date: 6/29/2007 5:03:36 PM
Author: Shay37

Date: 6/29/2007 4:59:40 PM

Author: rainbowtrout

No back hair on men. Or a** hair. Not. Having. It.

No Uggs and miniskirts.

No Speedos, unless you''re in the Olympics.

If you have ANY bulge, any at all, that rolls over low-cut jeans--DONT WEAR THEM!!!

No thong showing.

If you think it might be too small, honey, IT IS.


My crazy cooking ones:


No garlic pressers, they are for wusses.

Thou Shalt Not Put the Knife in the Sink

Thou Shalt Not Put the Knife Away Wet

Thou Shalt True the Blade Each Time One Uses It

Overuse of food processors dulls one''s knife skills

Thou Shalt Not Use Margarine, Ever

Unless Thou Art Diabetic, Thou Shalt Not Put Splenda In Baked Goods

Thou Shalt Not Abuse Good Fish or Steak By Cooking Above Medium Rare (exception: whitefish)

Thou Shalt Leave Cookie Dough In The Bowl to Pass to All Present, And Thou Shalt Not Worry about Salmonella, Many Generation Before Ye Have Lived and Eaten the Dough of the Cookie

Let us not forget the batter of the Cake


shay

Indeed, my child, it shall not be forgotten.

 

[TravelingGal]

LOL, these are funny....


Totally agree...no denim on denim.

Also love food touching...it''s a party on the plate...mingle!

I hate french manicured toes..they wig me out.

Agree...never take the last piece of anything...at least without asking!

Love rainbow trouts kitchen rules! I agree with all of them!

And my own:

-Get sandals that fit. No toe or heel overhang please.
-Don''t tailgate. You''re the one who''s gonna be at fault when the jerk brake checks ya.

And ones that especially pertain to travel:
-Don''t put your carry on luggage in row 12 when you''re sitting in row 34
-Don''t whip out the nailpolish on the plane...you have no idea how we can smell it 3 rows over.
-Don''t wonder why hotel rooms in Europe aren''t as big as America.
-Be comfortable. That includes wearing the dreaded white sneakers. Seriously, you aren''t fooling anybody anyway...everyone knows you''re a bloody tourist.

And for manners:
-Is it that hard to say "please" and "thank you" when ordering at a restaurant?

 

[jcrow]

i agree: * DH *hates* it when people salt or pepper their food before tasting it.
i don''t get it!

i''m sure when i get home dh will remind me of a thousand more that i have

 

[Mara]

lol i just have to say that i just got a pedicure and got a french, i LOVE french manicured toes, to me they are the classiest polish you can get..go figure...should i take a picture for all you haters? hehee.

other rules:
--learn how to merge onto a freeway, aka please go faster than 30 while getting on
--never BRAKE on the freeway unless there is traffic or an accident or something. braking randomly is a huge pet peeve and unsafe!
--no scarves in dead of summer
--no exposed bra straps with something like a tube top (i don''t care how cool carrie made it)
--on the same note, no black or dark bra straps with pastels, no contrasting bras at all please!!
--no exposed above-the-butt tattoos...cover it up!
--no littering out the car while driving, it''s illegal!
--no super long fake acrylic nails...so 80s

lol re: the last piece of something, if it sits there longer than 5 minutes, i take it because i''m like come on it looks lonely!! esp if it''s dessert. i also admit to painting my nails on the plane...but just once when i was desperate!

oh and re: eating with a tortilla off the plate, that is how we did it when i was younger for traditional mexican cooking, so i am totally used to food mixing and mingling...i love indian food for the same reason, rice and chicken and sauce and raita all sopped up with the naan? i am getting hungry!!

greg has a ton, he is super ''detailed'' (anal) about a lot of things. i am way more easygoing which is funny to think about when you look at my list.

 

[mrssalvo]

Date: 6/29/2007 6:15:31 PM
Author: Mara
lol i just have to say that i just got a pedicure and got a french, i LOVE french manicured toes, to me they are the classiest polish you can get..go figure...should i take a picture for all you haters? hehee.

ha, me too mara. I don't get them very often b/c they seem to chip quicker for some reason. But that's what I got done for my wedding...

braking to let people on the the major street off a small side streat when you have a green light...another big accident causer...


love the kitchen rules rainbowtrout...totally agree with the cookie dough, it's a must to lick the bowl, spoon, beaters and anything else with the cookie dough on it and I love the bites with the choc. chips

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 6/29/2007 6:27:26 PM
Author: mrssalvo

Date: 6/29/2007 6:15:31 PM
Author: Mara
lol i just have to say that i just got a pedicure and got a french, i LOVE french manicured toes, to me they are the classiest polish you can get..go figure...should i take a picture for all you haters? hehee.

ha, me too mara. I don''t get them very often b/c they seem to chip quicker for some reason. But that''s what I got done for my wedding...

Hehehe...it still wigs me out. But I admit, this stems from the fact that I hate my feet and I would NEVER draw attention to my toes with a FM. It''s like skinny jeans and not so skinny people...just doesn''t work.

Just pale pink for me! *booooooooooring*

 

[dianne]

Great thread! And I agree with so many that have already been posted.

1) DO NOT go to bed without removing makeup. If I accidentally fall asleep on the couch and wake up at 3:30am, knowing my alarm will go off at 5:30, I will still take off makeup before going to bed for those last 2 hours.

2) Must floss before brushing...not sure if this is considered the right way or not.

3) No toothpaste left in the sink...I will gag!!! You should see me when I travel with friends...I give a speech before any brushing begins.

4) Clean, clean, clean toilet....no water ring, ever!

5) When mailing anything from the home mailbox...the smallest envelope must be on top and each one thereafter stacked in order of increasing size before placing in mailbox.

6) When making a sandwich, mustard or mayo must reach to the very edge of the bread, and if it''s obvious how the two slices of bread were in the bag, like if one side is shaped differently then I have to line the bread back up with the goodies in the middle. (As I read this back I see how weird this sounds)

7) I have a kitchen drawer dedicated only to knives. The are lined up smallest to largest and the drawer is lined with a spongy mesh that keeps them in place when the drawer is opened and closed. My family teases me a lot about this one.

All my plastic containers are stacked within each other beside their matching lids which are stacked the same way.

9) I like to buy meat fresh when I''m going to use it. Not fond of freezing and defrosting.


Ok, I think I may have talked myself into some therapy.

 

[KimberlyH]

DH''s home and he''s added:

I change if I get the smallest bit of anything on my clothes
I change several times a day
I must eat my salad first (it''s the Italian in him...salads get eaten last)
I always think I have BO (I can''t believe I''m sharing that, but I can because I don''t, I''m just always afraid I do!)

 

[snlee]

Some of my own:
-Must wash hands after going to the bathroom
-Must wash hands before eating with hands
-No chewing loudly
-No talking with your mouth full
-No clipping your nails in public
-Don't put nail polish on in public/when other's are around. It stinks.
-Don't pay with cash unless you have to
-Always pay credit card statements in full
-Must close the bedroom door when it's time to sleep
-Rinse off dishes before putting them in the sink and don't leave them sitting in there for more than a day
-No butt crack showing, please!
-No food or drink sharing with people who aren't related to me/family/very close friend
-No McDonalds, Burger King, Taco Bell, etc. more than once or twice a year
-Must say I love you to husband once a day
-Don't leave your garage door open longer than you have to (when my neighbor leaves her garage door open for 15 minutes when she's not ready to go it pisses me off! Our garage is connected)
-Don't reply to a work email about a different subject. Start a new email!

I know I have more but can't think of them right now.

I agree with these:
-Toilet paper - When in holder, sheets must drop from the TOP of the roll!
-Only one ring per hand
-No nail art
-No jeans jackets while wearing jeans
-No hose or socks with sandals
-Too many meals out are bad for you
-Must have matching earrings
-No mixing of patterns
-No thong showing
-All the car ones
-Turn off your cell in quiet places
-No french manicured toes
-Always have lip balm with me
-Nails must be the same length
-No super long fake acrylic nails

 

[Miranda]

Funny thread. For other people, I have no rules...I think people should do what makes them happy. BUT, for ME, I have a ton of rules/guidelines. What I should wear and should not. What should be worn where and what should not.

I have the opposite of your dog rule Deco. No dog larger than me. DH wanted a Great Dane and I told him of this rule. Our Ridgeback broke my rule before we figured out that he had a thyroid disorder.

 

[luckystar112]

I''m weird about french manicured toes too...some people can pull it off though.
I really don''t like when people french manicure their OWN toes--it''s so obvious.
I hate really long toenails!

When using public restrooms:
-I always have to be in there by myself, or with a LOT of other people.
-I always rip off the first 2 ft of toilet paper and then use what is under that
-I always check the toilet before sitting down. Yeah, it''s great if you want to pop a squat, but please clean up your piddle. Thanks.

My bathroom:
-Trash always needs to be emptied!
-Wipe up the floor when getting out of the shower!

Kitchen:
-Soda/beer cases need to be ripped up and thrown in the trash...not placed next to the trash can. Huge pet peeve that my BF doesn''t seem to get.

-All dishes need to be in order in color and size.
-All pots and pans need to be facing the same way on the pot rack
-After pre-cleaning dishes, load the sponge with dish soap and clean in that way

Driving:
-Get OFF your cell phone.

-I don''t care how much bass your system has.
-Use your blinker
-Try not to be in the right lane when the light turns red so people can turn

I''m sure I have more.

 

[Fancy605]

Date: 6/29/2007 4:57:35 PM
Author: DivaDiamond007

- No polish on toe nails (I dance and it chips in less than a day)

You know I learned to be this way too because we were not allowed to have any in ballet (if the polish chipped and got into the blisters from our pointe shoes.... well it would be ICK) I am however going to do clear for my wedding.
In fact, I don''t like nail color in general. Give me natural or french or nothing.

hmmm...

-I am another person who doesn''t like my food to touch. In fact, I like my food arranged in a specific way on my plate. (I''m getting over it though) I am a picky eater in general though.
-I only like socks to hit my legs in certain places. Old Navy Socks hit correctly, and I like the little socks that don''t show under tennis shoes.
-I cannot stand to hear the word "done" incorrectly. I take this out on my students. "I''m done" they say, and I say, "Cookies get done, you''re finished."
-No sunglasses inside (unless there is a crazy bad glare)
-No gum chewing in public. Ick. (I''m with you Deco!)

 

[strmrdr]

my weird ones:
Eat one thing at a time on the plate till its gone then move to next.
Start with meat, then veggies then taters.
Except with french fries the catchup has to go directly on the food not on the plate.
turn the fan on when going potty or get yelled at!

 

[wifey2b]

Date: 6/29/2007 8:14:12 PM
Author: strmrdr
my weird ones:
Eat one thing at a time on the plate till its gone then move to next.
Start with meat, then veggies then taters.
Except with french fries the catchup has to go directly on the food not on the plate.
turn the fan on when going potty or get yelled at!

My honey forgot...we eat pizza or gyro sandwiches one layer at a time ending with crust/bread and yeah - his last one - that is a real one for him...first time he said that to me I just looked at him like what?! giggle...bet hey - beats when he got a spit wash from his then gf...I babysit just waaaaaaaaay too much - giggle :}

 

[wifey2b]

Date: 6/29/2007 8:14:12 PM
Author: strmrdr
my weird ones:
Eat one thing at a time on the plate till its gone then move to next.
Start with meat, then veggies then taters.
Except with french fries the catchup has to go directly on the food not on the plate.
turn the fan on when going potty or get yelled at!

the fan one is a real weird one...first time he said it to me I was like HUH?!...did I have to tell him I was just gonna pee?

another one that we both do, is eat pizza or gyro sandwiches one layer at a time, ending with crust/bread...funny how people grow up 1700 miles apart, but have some of the weird habits..my friends just kindda sat with their mouths opened when he started eating pie at their house...he ate it just like I did - but I wasn''t eating any - giggle :} Isn''t love great :}

 

[wifey2b]

sorry about the double post - said there was an error and it didn''t work - oh well

 

[FireGoddess]

Date: 6/29/2007 6:27:26 PM
Author: mrssalvo

Date: 6/29/2007 6:15:31 PM
Author: Mara
lol i just have to say that i just got a pedicure and got a french, i LOVE french manicured toes, to me they are the classiest polish you can get..go figure...should i take a picture for all you haters? hehee.

ha, me too mara. I don''t get them very often b/c they seem to chip quicker for some reason. But that''s what I got done for my wedding...

Me 3...it''s my favorite. And I only do french on my toes, not hands because it chips too fast on my hands!!!

 

[princesss]

I completely agree with so much of what''s been posted already (no denim on denim, no French pedicures, cookie dough is to be savoured...) but here are my rules that I can remember without my BF listing off my quirks...

Multicoloured candies (when eaten at home) must be separated into piles according to their colour, and then separated into piles with one of each colour in it. Then they are eaten from smallest pile to largest in order of quantity (if there are more reds, reds always get eaten first, then the colour with the second highest number, etc). When eaten in public, they can be mashed together BUT there must always be a pile with one of each colour to be eaten last. Oddly enough, BF and I do this the exact same way, and did before we met each other! This applies to ALL multicoloured candy, including candies where colour does not affect flavour (so we do this for Skittles and M&Ms). But with candies that have different flavours to go with the colours, the last pile may always be eaten in order of preference, not quantity.

Everything must be symmetrical. If BF touches one part of my body (say, my right shoulder) he must then touch the same spot on my left shoulder, and usually the spot exactly in the middle between the two. Otherwise I feel completely off-balance and it bothers me all day. Luckily he''s willing to "even me out", even though he thinks it''s weird.

My favourite book (The Time Traveler''s Wife) should always be within reach of my bed, and he always has to come tuck me in or give me a kiss when I finish it. I honestly can''t read it half the year because he''s not there to give me a kiss when I finish it!

Buy jeans that are the right length. I don''t want to see jeans being dragged or stopping at your ankles. Rolling up jeans that are the right length with heels when you are wearing sneakers is perfectly acceptable, though.

I won''t wear black with brown or navy blue or any combination no matter how casual things are. Even if I am just running to the store with no make-up on, I have to be coordinated.

Nail polish always has to be warm tones. No blue or green! Yuck. Also, it shouldn''t match your skin colour.

Nails can extend beyond the tips of the fingers by a little bit. A milimeter. Much longer than that and it just looks tacky. Nails should also be the same shape and length.

Grape juice should never be the last thing somebody drinks. It smells awful!

It doesn''t kill you to say "please" and "thank you". Be polite.

Show up before the boss. Don''t leave right exactly at 5 if you can help it. And don''t leave before your work is done.

On big plates food can''t touch. (Actually more of a portion control thing.) Touching on small plates is fine.

People above a size 6 shouldn''t wear skinny jeans. Anybody that does (myself included) just looks like a marshmallow shoved onto toothpicks. Not attractive. In fact, people should just stick to clothes they fit into. I do make exceptions for people who can''t fit their boobs into a top that fits the rest of their body. I suffer from Bloody Obnoxious Oversized Boobs Syndrome, too. As long as there is a coordinated shirt underneath and all the bits are covered, it can be cute.

Don''t yell on the cellphone. I don''t care about your conversation, and chances are the person on the other line doesn''t care about *anything* being shouted directly into their ear.

Freeways are meant to be driven on and if you don''t want to drive fast, get out of the fast lane.

 

[rainbowtrout]

Date: 6/29/2007 9:05:22 PM
Author: princesss

Bloody Obnoxious Oversized Boobs Syndrome, too. As long as there is a coordinated shirt underneath and all the bits are covered, it can be cute.

I love it! I am so applying for disability with this one--I HATE looking either pregnant or trampy 24/7!

 

[princesss]

Date: 6/29/2007 9:17:13 PM
Author: rainbowtrout

Date: 6/29/2007 9:05:22 PM

Author: princesss



Bloody Obnoxious Oversized Boobs Syndrome, too. As long as there is a coordinated shirt underneath and all the bits are covered, it can be cute.

I love it! I am so applying for disability with this one--I HATE looking either pregnant or trampy 24/7!

Yup. Those cute little empire waist shirts? I can never wear them. Ever. I get dirty looks from older women who pointedly stare at my belly. And if anything is a *smidge* too tight or too low cut I feel like a hooker.

 

[dianne]

ok...I was not going to ask but I feel I must, even if I am teased...


I am not big into fashion (I am a jeans and sneaker girl) and I don''t have a jean jacket...but what attire is appropriate to wear with a jean jacket?

 

[Maria D]

This is such a funny thread! I can''t believe how many of the same ''rules'' I have as other people. Here are some I didn''t see (or might have missed).

-no hair ''fasteners'' of any kind unless I''m at the beach or at the gym. This means no barrettes, scrunchies, combs, clips or bobby-pins. Especially bobby-pins. I absolutely detest bobby-pins!
-no T-shirts with written words on them. No obvious logos on clothing or accessories, including handbags.
-dirty dishes go in the dishwasher. Not in the sink, and definitely NOT ON THE COUNTER. What? The dishwasher is full of clean dishes? Then PUT THEM AWAY, dammit!

I''m another one that can''t stand chipped nail polish or varying length nails. Yuck! I don''t like french manicures period (fingers or toes) but that''s just a weird personal preference.

 

[decodelighted]

Date: 6/29/2007 9:40:56 PM
Author: dianne
what attire is appropriate to wear with a jean jacket?

My preferred combo is a little sundress with a jean jacket over it ... or a breezy skirt/white tank or t-shirt with a jean jacket ... or maybe khaki capris ... or white capris ... NO SHORTS. NO JEAN-CUT OTHER PANTS. Maybe, maybe a wide leg trouser if the material is NOT BLUE or jeans-like in texture or anyway. I''m also picky about what colors of blue "go" with jeans jackets (or jeans themselves).

ETA: But, full disclosure, I wore a jean jacket with my STRAPLESS LACE WEDDING DRESS (at least during the chilly barn reception).

 

[mrssalvo]

Date: 6/29/2007 9:47:55 PM
Author: decodelighted

Date: 6/29/2007 9:40:56 PM

Author: dianne

what attire is appropriate to wear with a jean jacket?

My preferred combo is a little sundress with a jean jacket over it ... or a breezy skirt/white tank or t-shirt with a jean jacket ... or maybe khaki capris ... or white capris ... NO SHORTS. NO JEAN-CUT OTHER PANTS. Maybe, maybe a wide leg trouser if the material is NOT BLUE or jeans-like in texture or anyway. I''m also picky about what colors of blue ''go'' with jeans jackets (or jeans themselves).

ditto!! I also like to wear jean jackets in the fall with camel colored cords...

 

[jcrow]

another - when checking out at the grocery store - ALL items must be in order and put together on the belt. all frozen food together. all veggies. all fridge stuff. all pantry stuff. etc. makes it MUCH easier to undo groceries when i get home.

 

[mrssalvo]

Date: 6/29/2007 10:33:00 PM
Author: jcrow
another - when checking out at the grocery store - ALL items must be in order and put together on the belt. all frozen food together. all veggies. all fridge stuff. all pantry stuff. etc. makes it MUCH easier to undo groceries when i get home.

that is so me!!! I do the exact same thing!!

 

[BigDiamonds]

Great thread! I echo:

- Sunglasses inside or at night. Really. Your''e not Scott Storch (and did you really want to be???)

- Open toe shoes w/heavy clothing. FI doesn''t get this. He walks out of the house in january in jean and sweaters with flip flops. If you need a sweater, PUT ON SOME SHOES!!!

Also:

- Don''t pull out a compact in public. There''s nothing you''re going to do with it that we''re going to want to see.

- Don''t use every single mention of a foreign country to bring up everywhere you''ve traveled. We don''t care, and you just sound pretentious.

And one that I''m sure you all will appreciate:
You paid all that money for those beautiful pieces of jewelry, please clean them!!! Nothing worse than someone with a great ring that''s just filthy.

That''s all for now...

 

[monarch64]

This thread is hilarious, it reminds me of my mother''s rules, and she has a ton. Mainly I think you''re all a bunch of nutcases, though, lol! I have the "usual" rules regarding fashion, nails, VPL, etc. but I''ll try to add some...

No suede in the summer (footwear or bags), and no patent in the winter
No velvet clothing or shoes unless it''s worn between Nov. and March
sorry, no opaque black tights with anything, ever.
Dresses over jeans, not a good look. Tunic length tops are a completely different story.


My mom''s kitchen rules:
eggs must be put away the second you take a couple from the carton to transfer it into whatever recipe
milk and butter, same as above
peanut butter must be refrigerated even if it means no spreadability and tearing apart the bread you''re trying to spread it on
said kitchen must be bleached in entirety every time it is used
the dishwasher doesn''t clean dishes as thoroughly as handwashing does, so we shall never use it (but we will b*tch about washing dishes until the day we die)

My personal ones:
bed must always be made unless we are in it
contact solution must always remain closed to avoid contamination from typical bathroom bacteria
bathroom sink and faucets must always be cleaned and polished, no water spots
shower curtain plastic liner must be washed and dried at least once a week, no spots, thank you
no expired food in refrigerator, ever
cabinet in which salt and pepper and other spices reside must be frequently cleaned so there is no "dust" on the shelf
ceiling fan in bedroom must be on 24/7
t.v. remotes must be cleaned frequently as well as computer keyboards and mice (have you seen the new mouse that can be submerged in water and cleaned? I have to have one! they''re only $30!)

 

[cutey TT]

These are so hilarious!

The ones I''m most passionate about:
- Definitely no pantylines (God gave us 2 butts, not 4!)
- Don''t wear clothes made out of that jersey material, unless you can (it really shows everything!)
- Make sure that when you put on your bra, the straps aren''t twisted (people can see it and it shows lack of attention to detail)
- No lowrise jeans / pants if you''re going to let your muffiintop hang out (it''s just gross!)
- Matching mommy-and-daughter outfits (and for that matter, daddy-and-son) are really not that cute
- Proper toilet paper installation (unrolling off the top, as mentioned several times previously) -- I, too, will remove the "backwards" roll and put it back on the right way
- Never take the last piece of food when there are other people around (if you''re alone and no one''s going to see, then all bets are off)
- Always be on time (and if you''re late, don''t give a thousand excuses)
- Don''t scold or yell at your children in public. It''s tacky and embarassing for everyone who''s within earshot. Go home and do it in private, if you have to.
- If your kids make a mess (in a restaurant or at someone else''s house), clean up after them!
- Don''t let your kids behave like wild animals in my house and then blame my "non-child-friendly" furniture when your kid gets hurt (I have two little ones and they know how to behave in our "non-child-friendly" house)

I, too, used to travel a lot for work, so here are some travel-related ones as well:
- No smoking hotel rooms mean no smoking! Don''t ruin the room for the rest of humanity (same goes for non-smoking rental cars...no amount of deodorizer can remove the smell)
- Don''t try to sneak on the plane before they''ve called your row (there is a reason they board the plane in order and no one thinks you''re cute or clever)
- Proper elevator etiquette: 1) Let people out of the elevator before stepping in; 2)The last person out of the elevator should hold the door, so the next group can get in; 3) The first person in the elevator should hold the "door open" button so as the last person (who''s holding the door) can be on his merry way; 4) Face forward so more people can get on; 5) No excretion of bodily gases (ever!)
- Check a map or ask for directions if you don''t know. Trying to wing it (and getting lost), especially with others in the car, is not cool.

I''m sure I can come up with plenty more...!

 

[Madam Bijoux]

Never trust a man who wears better jewelry than his wife wears.