PS Mommy Thread-Newborn to 12 months!

[Dreamer_D]

Date: 7/16/2009 5:26:55 PM
Author: MustangGal
Sophie should be napping through the day, she probably won''t stay awake more and an hour to 1.5 hours at a time. If she''s going longer than that she might be over tired. I can''t believe your MIL come over that late

, I would just set a rule that everyone has to leave by 10pm no matter what time they arrive. You''ll never catch up on sleep if they stay to the wee hours of the morning!

Ditto. Actually, at that age Hunter often only stayed awake for 45 min or an hour between naps! Pandora recently went through this with Daisy and finally figured out her sleepy signals. You''d think babies would go to sleep when they are tired, but they dont! They just get more and more revved up and cranky

And you in laws sounds crazy! Time to lay down the law, be "bad mommy" if you want, they will get the picture.

Mela I have only read the baby whisperer. I think there are a lot of positives going on that I have learned from that book. Hunter generally goes down for naps well without nursing (it gets harder to get them to sleep as they get older and more tuned into things, so watch for that), he routine;y naps 1.5 to 2 hours 2 x a day, which is so nice for me. More recently we have been able to get him to go back to sleep really easily without nursing at night, which is also a big deal I think. But from everything I have read and seen with my friends who have kids and heard from other moms here, around 4-5 mo most babies have a big "regression". They are developing so fast then and I think it causes them to wake a lot! I am completely convinced that we can structure and help create good sleep habits in our kids, but the whle sleep industry exists because of a myth that babies "sleep through the night" by three months. Some babies do, but I think it is the exception not the norm and also that it is much more common with FF babies than BF babies. So I am doing everything I can to help with Hunter''s healthy sleep habits, but I am not going to sweat it too much. I think having that attitude helps because it can be really depressing if you think "My kid is the only one!" LOL! PS-- I think thrush is a good possibility, maybe you should get treated? Also, I had "milk blisters" that look like whiteheads in my nipples for a little while and they also felt like needles. Do you have that? I actually took a needle and popped it and it really helped.

Everyone else Thanks for the commisseration! I think this thread proves my point to Mela above about the fantasy that is STTN at 3 months. Let''s start a revolution!

 

[Blenheim]

Fiery - I''ll be happy to answer questions when you get to that point.
And your MIL - holy cow. If you were to ignore any knocking at the door after, say, 9 or 10 pm, would she be the type to just escalate it? Or would she get the hint? That''s probably wishful thinking, with everything else you''ve been through with her. Or what would happen if you just answered the door and said, "It''s past Sophia''s bedtime, but we''d be glad to see you tomorrow morning or early afternoon!" and then just repeated as necessary?

 

[TravelingGal]

To the ladies who have hubbies who are getting mad at the kids...

I wouldn''t worry too much about it. Harping on it will make it worse. TGuy called Amelia "blob" for 6 months. I remember when she was about 2 or so months (can''t remember exactly possibly younger) I left for a very short while. I warned him she might get fussy (I forgot why). I left with the image of him peacefully playing with her laying on a pillow on his lap.

Well apparently, after I left, she started crying. A LOT. He was so upset by it and I couldn''t believe it took it PERSONALLY. It ruined his entire day and he was a bit standoffish with her. I was thinking, geez, how immature is this? But I just told him he did fine and left it at that.

Now that TGuy is more confident with her (and that took months to build) he doesn''t get upset with her at all for doing normal things. As someone said, sleep deprivation really contributes to our DH''s behavior, but what makes it more annoying is that we moms think, HELLO, I am more sleep deprived than YOU.

 

[nycbkgirl]

Date: 7/16/2009 6:08:30 PM
Author: TravelingGal
To the ladies who have hubbies who are getting mad at the kids...

I wouldn''t worry too much about it. Harping on it will make it worse. TGuy called Amelia ''blob'' for 6 months. I remember when she was about 2 or so months (can''t remember exactly possibly younger) I left for a very short while. I warned him she might get fussy (I forgot why). I left with the image of him peacefully playing with her laying on a pillow on his lap.

Well apparently, after I left, she started crying. A LOT. He was so upset by it and I couldn''t believe it took it PERSONALLY. It ruined his entire day and he was a bit standoffish with her. I was thinking, geez, how immature is this? But I just told him he did fine and left it at that.

Now that TGuy is more confident with her (and that took months to build) he doesn''t get upset with her at all for doing normal things. As someone said, sleep deprivation really contributes to our DH''s behavior, but what makes it more annoying is that we moms think, HELLO, I am more sleep deprived than YOU.

AMEN!

 

[nycbkgirl]

last nite i woke dh up at midnite and said get up and go to the couch bc IM TIRED and wanna go to sleep! jon was still sleeping at this point but was gonna wake up soon to eat...so i tried to get some sleep..is it just me or is it that when u can sleep..u dont!..i coudnt sleep for a while but then i guess i finally did...then at 230 am...thru my closed door, a/c on and earplugs in...i hear jon yelling and screamin bloody murder!...i run out there dh has him on the changing table in his diapers trying to give him mylicon while half asleep...imlike what the hell is goin on! he doesnt know whats wrong with him...so i take him and hold him over my shoulder and pat and sure enough he had to burp!..once he did that i put him down and he slept til 7am! o my what would dh have done if i hadnt woken up!

 

[gailrmv]

Hey gals, just a short sleep deprived post - sorry not to be more personalized.

I really appreciate everyone''s commiseration and encouragement on the weight. It is nice to know I am not alone. I have always struggled with my weight - to maintain being slightly overweight, I always worked out like crazy and watched my diet carefully. It doesn''t seem fair and I know it won''t get any easier. I am trying to just avoid the junk and sugar because I know it is of no nutritional value. Somehow just like sleep begets sleep, junk eating begets junk eating for me. So I''m trying to eat really healthy. It''s hard though.

We;''ve had a rough couple nights with lots of night wakings. Last night A did JUST what DD''s baby has been doing. He got stuck and couldn''t roll back over! This was like the third wakeup. I am SO exhausted. I''m working part time from home, and had to do a lot of work today, and was just BEAT. So I''m off to bed ASAP.

While I wouldn''t wish sleep deprivation on any of you, it does make me feel better to know I''m not the only one!

I have been hanging out with some other moms and babies around A''s age and I realize he is just a lot more active and awake than the others. Must just be his temperment or something, but he almost never sleeps like the others. He''s always awake and alert. We are STILL struggling with naps. I''ve read a lot and am trying lots of things. Had this whole routine worked out that I devised after reading No Cry Nap Solution, tried it a few times with no results, finally got him to sleep like an angel in his crib, for a whopping FIVE MINUTES. My friend''s mom babysat today so I could go to the dentist and she got him to nap in his swing. Maybe we''ll have to do that again tomorrow. So frustrating.

Sorry for a very me-centric post. More soon!

 

[neatfreak]

Re: rolling over and getting stuck It''ll pass! I promise. My boys had that problem for a week or so-then they figured it out and now happily flop right onto their tummies when I put them down on their backs to sleep.

And in personal news-we signed the papers for our house today! I am so so excited. But the documents need to be overnighted to CA and then the loan will be funded tomorrow-so we don''t have the keys until tomorrow but one more sleep and we will be homeowners! Wahoo!

It''s a fixer upper but it''s a nice size in a nice residential neighborhood with a playground about a block away. Yippee!!

 

[puffy]

neat YAY for 1 step closer!!! you guys must be so excited! and that is great that there is a playground a block away, it''ll be perfect for the boys. there is a gigantic park right by our house as well and B loves going there. as soon as we walk that way, he knows we''re going to the park and starts jumping around.
when does the move take place?

 

[neatfreak]

Date: 7/17/2009 12:12:32 AM
Author: puffy
neat YAY for 1 step closer!!! you guys must be so excited! and that is great that there is a playground a block away, it''ll be perfect for the boys. there is a gigantic park right by our house as well and B loves going there. as soon as we walk that way, he knows we''re going to the park and starts jumping around.

when does the move take place?

Thanks Puffy! My DH is actually leaving tomorrow with our dogs to drive out. Then I will supervise the movers and fly out with the babies next Wednesday. They are going to looooove us on the plane (1 adult and 2 babies!)

 

[snlee]

Congrats neat! That''s so exciting! Good luck with the move!

 

[Dreamer_D]

Date: 7/16/2009 10:56:02 PM
Author: neatfreak
Re: rolling over and getting stuck It''ll pass! I promise. My boys had that problem for a week or so-then they figured it out and now happily flop right onto their tummies when I put them down on their backs to sleep.

And in personal news-we signed the papers for our house today! I am so so excited. But the documents need to be overnighted to CA and then the loan will be funded tomorrow-so we don''t have the keys until tomorrow but one more sleep and we will be homeowners! Wahoo!

It''s a fixer upper but it''s a nice size in a nice residential neighborhood with a playground about a block away. Yippee!!

That is wonderful news! I am so happy for you... and jealous

Will you post some pictures of the inside when you move? Don''t know if you are ok with that, but I''d love to see them. Maybe on FB?

Rolling -- HUnter has been doing it for almost a month now and hasn''t figured it out

Well, he has figured out how to roll and he will sleep on his belly, he''s always on the belly when we go in, but he is still waking 3x per night these days and it is making me crazy! Don''t know if the rolling contributes or not.

 

[nycbkgirl]

NEAT- im so happy for ya ! I wish u guys all the best and I hope u enjoy the house! Congrats!

 

[mela lu]

Blen - thanks for the suggestion of Thrust. I've been reading about it (didn't even know it existed) and found this:

"Most women use the word “burning” as they describe their pain. One mother said, “My nipple feels as if it has a piece of broken glass in it.” Some mothers with yeast infections report shooting, burning pains in the breasts during and/or after feedings. Another woman described her breast pain in this way, “Fifteen minutes after breastfeeding it felt as if my baby’s saliva were acid, which was slowly working its way up my breasts and burning me.” Some women experience pain that runs down the arm or across the back in addition to breast pain. One woman said the pain felt like “nerve pain.”

Yup. That's about right! Especially the broken glass part. I couldn't identify what the pain felt like, but that is EXACTLY it.
Looks like I gots me a case of da thrush!

Going to the Pedi on Tuesday. I'm not sure this is what I have, but sounds reasonable. ETA: Neither of us have any of the other symptoms though. No rashes, etc. Hmm.
In the meantime I'm going to up my Acidopholous and sterilize all his paci's, eliminate all sugars from my diet and change my nursing pads after every feed.

SUCKS.

They say women who have Cesarean's are more prone because of the Antibiotics they give you during the surgery. Can I NOT catch a break? At lease I have an easy baby. That is my reward for having this cursed body.

 

[Dreamer_D]

Mela Well that sucks but good to know! There is a simple treatment they give - gentian violet I think --they put an ointment on the nipples and then the baby nurses so you both get treated. The problem with treating it and not clearing it up completely is that you can pass it back and forth between you!

I sure hope it clears quickly! Is there a naturalpathic store near you? They may also have some things you can take. One thing you want to do is make your system really basic (not acid) so drink gallons of peppermint tea! Actually, you could try doing the red rose detox (I think I heard you did that), that is an anti-yeast diet too. May be hard when BFing, and I don't think I would take all the pills and stuff, but the diet itself is probably safe.



ETA One other possibility is vasospasm "My nipple turns whita after nursing: http://www.nbci.ca/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=48:sore-nipples&catid=5:information&Itemid=17), where the nipple gets over stimulated and the blood doesn't flow there anymore, and that feels like a burning too. I had that. After Romy nurses, look at the end of your nipple... is it white? If you pinch and stimulate your nipple does the nipple pink up and the pain go away? If so, then it may not be thrush. I found this very painful for a few weeks and it would burn and hurt and throb for a long time after nursing ans in between. It went away after about 2-3 weeks.

Here is the candida protocol from Jack Newman: http://www.nbci.ca/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=12:candida-protocol&catid=5:information&Itemid=17

 

[Pandora II]

Hi All,

Mela - poor you on the bfing. I hope that it does turn out to be something fixable (I hate the whole ''no idea what it is, you''ll just have to deal'' scenarios) - ggod on you for keeping going, and Romy is so incredibly cute!

Mrs - So sorry to hear about your job, not fun in this economy. I''m sure that you''ll find something even better, and in the meantime enjoy the chance to spend more time at home with Sage.

Fiery - I''m using EASY and it really helped to go back through it and really look at the cries and other signs (I thought I was looking - but turned out I wasn''t really). Now I know that a cough, cough, cough cry is tiredness and not hunger or anything else - DH had her last night for a bit while I did some legal stuff and I could hear her crying...he comes in and says that I''ll have to feed her because she''s hungry, I knew she''d had a really good feed 30 minutes earlier and that she was doing the tired cry so I told him to try putting her to bed - 5 minutes later there was silence!

I used to have her awake for 14 hours at a time until I started to do EASY consistently, now she naps for between 1-3.5 hours every 1.5 hours during the day, and wakes up once at 4am for a 15 minute feed.

Your MIL is a menace! You will find it really hard to establish good sleep habits etc with Sophia if she''s behaving that way - and it is totally unfair on you and your husband. Boundary setting time methinks - could you have them over say twice a week, or set a limit of everyone out by 10pm? After all she is YOUR baby not hers - I don''t believe in grandparent''s rights I''m afraid.

DD - Boo to the regression.

I was talking to my mother about male incompetence with babies today and she reckons it''s a hormonal thing that allows us to be more atuned and less annoyed by the baby.

My DH gets very frustrated when he can''t stop her crying - and even more so when he passes her to me and she instantly stops. Then I get told that there''s no point in him picking her up because she only wants me! I''ve watched what he does and he actually doesn''t interact with her - he''ll carry her around, bounce her up and down etc but try and read a magazine at the same time. This morning in bed she was looking over and smiling at him and looking like she wanted to play with him, so I passed her over... what did he do? Draped her over his chest and carried on reading the Economist. I made him put it down, prop himself up with pillows and put her on his knee and talk to her, smile at her, play standing up games etc and he was amazed that she responded so much... doubt it will last but hopefully it''s a start.

TDM - I''m so sorry about the waking. Daytime is bad enough but chuck in nightime as well and things are seriously un-fun! I wish I had some ideas for you... how old is A. now?

NF - fantastic news on the house! It''s so exciting and I hope the last bits all go smoothly!

MGAL - Good luck with the car - I''m assured that MOST babies love it (and even Daisy is starting to settle - only screams at roundabouts and red lights, or if she''s plain fed up and tired)

I''m still trogging along with the legal stuff - I had a 2 hour meeting about a possible settlement with them this morning. DH was a star and looked after Daisy all morning so I could properly concentrate (first time I had left the house on my own since she was born!

). They''ve upped their offer, but not enough. It ended up being a case of both of us stating that we had a strong case and that the other was more likely to lose in court. Most of the time I just kept thinking: keep calm, breathe deeply, take your time, throw their questions back to them etc. Basically it''s a poker game and the question is who has the better hand? I''m pretty sure that I do and I''m going to play tight aggressive and see what happens.

I stopped the meeting after 2 hours and we have agreed to speak again on Monday and in the meantime consider our positions.

It was pretty stressful and whilst I came out of it feeling pretty happy with how I played it, the doubts started creeping in all afternoon: what if I do go to court, lose and just end up with a big legal bill? Maybe I should have taken the cheque and run? etc etc. I spoke to my brother who said it was normal to feel how I did as I was coming down from the adrenaline so I feel a bit happier but completely drained. DH has gone off to Wales to climb a mountain for a friend''s stag weekend so I haven''t had him here to calm me down.

Just to complete my ''wonderful'' day, I had to take Daisy for her first vaccinations and 8 week check.

She''s now 12lbs and 56.5cm long, and passed with flying colours... hooray! She was so well-behaved, and lay on the couch beaming at the doctor and squealing and gabbling away.

Then I had to hold her for the shots and it was awful - she was all happy and smiling and then these ear-splitting screams and tears. Even worse, after the second one, I had her on my knee to re-dress her and just for a second I held her leg the way I had held it for the doctor and she flinched.

Even though she only cried for 30 seconds or so each time, and I know that she is very fortunate to be able to be protected against these diseases, I felt so terrible and I can''t even buy her an ice-cream to make up for it...

Then we have to go for more at 12 & 16 weeks - and DH is needle-phobic so I have to do them all.

Actually talking of ice-cream, I was very bad the other day

and gave her a teeny tiny bit of mine - she spat it out pretty quickly, but the strawberry sauce was very popular

.

Daisy is being SO good now on the whole sleeping thing - I put her down the other afternoon when she was wide-awake but tired and walked out after tucking her in. There was much whinging and pretending to cry for the next 5 minutes, so I went back in, told her that I was there but it was sleeping time and walked out again. 30 seconds of whinging and then silence for TWO HOURS!

The only problem is that she has learnt to roll from back to front. She''s always been a side-sleeper and will sometimes roll onto her back and then back again, but the last couple of days she''s rolling right over onto her stomach - but, she isn''t capable of rolling back. I spoke to the doctor about it today and she told me not to worry too much and that if she could get there herself it was very different from being PUT on her front to sleep.

If I see her on it, I move her back onto her side, but I can''t watch 24/7, so I''m just hoping that she learns to roll the other way as well. It just worries me that she''s still very little and can''t push right up on her front like an older baby can. I have things to try and stop her rolling, but she just kicks them out of the way.

 

[fisherofmengirly]

Threadjack to Neatfreak:

I noticed on that other site that your name happens to be my most favorite name for a baby girl! So, I was wondering... how do you like it? Have you ever felt that it was too "childish" (as my husband thinks it is, because it ends in the "ee" sound)? Do you wish you had a longer full name or a name that was more open to a nickname? (Do you have a nickname that comes from your first name?) Just wondering, and hoping that you''d be able to give me some ammo to press on for this name to be at the top of the list.

 

[neatfreak]

Date: 7/17/2009 9:12:21 PM
Author: fisherofmengirly
Threadjack to Neatfreak:


I noticed on that other site that your name happens to be my most favorite name for a baby girl! So, I was wondering... how do you like it? Have you ever felt that it was too ''childish'' (as my husband thinks it is, because it ends in the ''ee'' sound)? Do you wish you had a longer full name or a name that was more open to a nickname? (Do you have a nickname that comes from your first name?) Just wondering, and hoping that you''d be able to give me some ammo to press on for this name to be at the top of the list.

Hehe. Thanks Fisher! I love it overall. I don''t think it''s too childish although I do think the longer forms of the name are nice too if you want to go that way. If people want to use a nickname for me they just subtract the last three letters and call me that.

So it''s still nickname-able!

When I was a kid I wanted to be called Kelly because I thought it was cooler than my name and that my name was too strange. I did get annoyed as a kid that no one could spell it, that there were no pencils pre-made with my name at the store, etc. But I never got made fun of for it and now that I am older I like it a lot.

Hope that helps!

 

[neatfreak]

Date: 7/17/2009 8:32:53 AM
Author: dreamer_dachsie

Date: 7/16/2009 10:56:02 PM

Author: neatfreak

Re: rolling over and getting stuck It''ll pass! I promise. My boys had that problem for a week or so-then they figured it out and now happily flop right onto their tummies when I put them down on their backs to sleep.


And in personal news-we signed the papers for our house today! I am so so excited. But the documents need to be overnighted to CA and then the loan will be funded tomorrow-so we don''t have the keys until tomorrow but one more sleep and we will be homeowners! Wahoo!


It''s a fixer upper but it''s a nice size in a nice residential neighborhood with a playground about a block away. Yippee!!

That is wonderful news! I am so happy for you... and jealous

Will you post some pictures of the inside when you move? Don''t know if you are ok with that, but I''d love to see them. Maybe on FB?

DD-I posted an outside picture on FB and will post some more when I get a chance. I''ll post some inside ones on here once I get some without the previous owner''s stuff in them-I feel bad posting those because her personal stuff is in every picture...

 

[mela lu]

Date: 7/17/2009 12:57:10 PM
Author: dreamer_dachsie
Mela Well that sucks but good to know! There is a simple treatment they give - gentian violet I think --they put an ointment on the nipples and then the baby nurses so you both get treated. The problem with treating it and not clearing it up completely is that you can pass it back and forth between you!

I sure hope it clears quickly! Is there a naturalpathic store near you? They may also have some things you can take. One thing you want to do is make your system really basic (not acid) so drink gallons of peppermint tea! Actually, you could try doing the red rose detox (I think I heard you did that), that is an anti-yeast diet too. May be hard when BFing, and I don't think I would take all the pills and stuff, but the diet itself is probably safe.

ETA One other possibility is vasospasm 'My nipple turns whita after nursing: http://www.nbci.ca/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=48:sore-nipples&catid=5:information&Itemid=17), where the nipple gets over stimulated and the blood doesn't flow there anymore, and that feels like a burning too. I had that. After Romy nurses, look at the end of your nipple... is it white? If you pinch and stimulate your nipple does the nipple pink up and the pain go away? If so, then it may not be thrush. I found this very painful for a few weeks and it would burn and hurt and throb for a long time after nursing ans in between. It went away after about 2-3 weeks.

Dreamer - thanks for this! I actually don't think it's thrush, because there are zero other symtoms. Just nipple pain.
I'm going to a La Leche League meeting on Monday morning. Wish me luck - hopefully it's a latch issue after all. I do notice my nipples are white after feeding. I thought that was "normal" but now, reading that info on vasospasms, I'm going to try pinching them after to see what happens. Thanks for the tip. Would this explain the broken glass feeling WHILE nursing though?

ETA: I love the Wild Rose Cleanse! I used to do it annually, and I'm going to adopt the diet portion again to see if that helps with the pain.

 

[Dreamer_D]

HELP What would you do??

Hunter is waking between 3 and 5 times each night. It seems that he rolls on his tummy and although he sleeps fine that way, he cannot *fall asleep* that way. So he wakes crying and complaining every 1.5 hours. Wew tried sleep positioners, he is now so strong he rolls over in them, so we don''t use them anymore.

I am going crazy, please tell me what you would do in this situation? I can think of a few options, but your input is much needed.

 

[nycbkgirl]

DD- i really dont have advice but would u ever try conditioning him to sleep on his tummy? i know a lot of ppl frown upon that but its the only way for me and it works...there is nothing around that they can grab so nothing would cover their face and they move and lift their heads like champs. and of course i have the monitor next to me. my mom said i slept on my tummy as well. its a real lifesaver for me bc they would sleep terribly if on their backs. but dont kill me i know its frowned upon like i said.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

DD, we started putting T to bed on her tummy around 4.5 months. She could roll both ways and she always ended up that way anyways. Our pedi was not concerned. Are you feeding him or just rolling him during these wake-ups?

 

[Dreamer_D]

Honestly, he is 5 months old I don''t care if he sleeps on his tummy! But how to condition him? That is the question! CIO? Pick up put down?

He is also getting so that he wants to nurse to sleep... I think he is teething and it is causing all sorts of havoc.

 

[nycbkgirl]

ok phew i thought id get yelled at

...
yes get him sleepy in ur arms and i hold them over the bed and put them down fast on tummy (arms and head to the side)...and i pat on their butts or rock the bassinett...a lot of the times they pick their heads up and are up ..i leave them like that for a while (i mean let him cio for a couple of minutes bc they become even more tired then)and if it doesnt work .. i repeat until success! works everytime but takes a while sometimes.

 

[fisherofmengirly]

Thanks for that information, NF.

I will pass it on to my hubby, for sure. The only thing with the longer names is that I don''t think any of them are pretty. The one ending in ope is so weird to me, and makes me think of a centipede. Can you think of any that you have heard and wouldn''t have minded having been your "real" name while you went by your name (you know, the one I just adore)?

 

[Dreamer_D]

Date: 7/18/2009 9:50:39 AM
Author: Tacori E-ring
DD, we started putting T to bed on her tummy around 4.5 months. She could roll both ways and she always ended up that way anyways. Our pedi was not concerned. Are you feeding him or just rolling him during these wake-ups?

I always start by just rolling him and putting in a binky, but sometimes he screams like a maniac and for the last 3 nights I have been feeding him. He was waking "only"

three times a night for a while, and we had gotten to the point where DH could get him to go down just by putting the binky in or by picking him up and then putting him down, took 5 minutes. For some reason, about 4 nights ago this all went haywaire and DH can''t get him down anymore! He cries and cries. And so I have fed him because honestly we all need sleep. But he isn''t hungry, just sucks for 5 minutes. We are having the same trouble with naps! I put him down almost 30 minutes ago and he is in there whining right now!

 

[Tacori E-ring]

Date: 7/18/2009 10:02:21 AM
Author: dreamer_dachsie

Date: 7/18/2009 9:50:39 AM

Author: Tacori E-ring

DD, we started putting T to bed on her tummy around 4.5 months. She could roll both ways and she always ended up that way anyways. Our pedi was not concerned. Are you feeding him or just rolling him during these wake-ups?

I always start by just rolling him and putting in a binky, but sometimes he screams like a maniac and for the last 3 nights I have been feeding him. He was waking ''only''

three times a night for a while, and we had gotten to the point where DH could get him to go down just by putting the binky in or by picking him up and then putting him down, took 5 minutes. For some reason, about 4 nights ago this all went haywaire and DH can''t get him down anymore! He cries and cries. And so I have fed him because honestly we all need sleep. But he isn''t hungry, just sucks for 5 minutes. We are having the same trouble with naps! I put him down almost 30 minutes ago and he is in there whining right now!

I think that''s an issue. Obviously parenting is a *personal* thing so you need to be comfortable but it sounds like Hunter is conditioning YOU while you need to condition HIM. He is getting older so you need to stop it now IMHO. I would let him cry for 15 mins. When T was that age she would usually always put herself back to sleep within that time frame. If not I would go in there and pat her (no eye contact or words) and leave again. If she was still upset she was probably hungry so I would feed her. Let him whine. He will figure it out. Better NOW than having to deal with this when he is older.

 

[natalina]

Date: 7/18/2009 10:00:44 AM
Author: fisherofmengirly
Thanks for that information, NF.

I will pass it on to my hubby, for sure. The only thing with the longer names is that I don''t think any of them are pretty. The one ending in ope is so weird to me, and makes me think of a centipede. Can you think of any that you have heard and wouldn''t have minded having been your ''real'' name while you went by your name (you know, the one I just adore)?

You''re killing me with the mystery, NF & Fisher! Specifically because there is a name that DH and I both love but hesitate to use because we really want our little girl to have a formal name that shortens into a nickname, but this one sounds like a nickname and we don''t *love* the longer forms we can think of. Your last comment about ''ope'' has me thinking we may have the same name in mind. I don''t want to say too much for NF''s comfort, but can you give any other hints as to what the name might be?

 

[fisherofmengirly]

Natalina, It''s a 6 letter name. I think NF has stated her first name before, but in case she hasn''t, I won''t add beyond that (but Natalina, I think I''ve posted many times my favorite girl names). What are yours? Maybe they match!!

 

[Dreamer_D]

Date: 7/18/2009 10:12:14 AM
Author: Tacori E-ring

Date: 7/18/2009 10:02:21 AM
Author: dreamer_dachsie

Date: 7/18/2009 9:50:39 AM

Author: Tacori E-ring

DD, we started putting T to bed on her tummy around 4.5 months. She could roll both ways and she always ended up that way anyways. Our pedi was not concerned. Are you feeding him or just rolling him during these wake-ups?

I always start by just rolling him and putting in a binky, but sometimes he screams like a maniac and for the last 3 nights I have been feeding him. He was waking ''only''

three times a night for a while, and we had gotten to the point where DH could get him to go down just by putting the binky in or by picking him up and then putting him down, took 5 minutes. For some reason, about 4 nights ago this all went haywaire and DH can''t get him down anymore! He cries and cries. And so I have fed him because honestly we all need sleep. But he isn''t hungry, just sucks for 5 minutes. We are having the same trouble with naps! I put him down almost 30 minutes ago and he is in there whining right now!

I think that''s an issue. Obviously parenting is a *personal* thing so you need to be comfortable but it sounds like Hunter is conditioning YOU while you need to condition HIM. He is getting older so you need to stop it now IMHO. I would let him cry for 15 mins. When T was that age she would usually always put herself back to sleep within that time frame. If not I would go in there and pat her (no eye contact or words) and leave again. If she was still upset she was probably hungry so I would feed her. Let him whine. He will figure it out. Better NOW than having to deal with this when he is older.

I agree it needs to change, but how to do it is a little sticky in my mind. If I read you correctly, you suggest that when he wakes at night we let him whine for at least 15 minutes, if he doesn''t go to sleep in that time then pat him, and if he doesn''t calm down then feed him? I worry this still reinforces the behaviour but just teaches him that he needs to cry/whine for longer than 15 minutes to get fed. How to tell the difference between whining and hunger is the sticking point. I guess we can try the bottle at night thing again, but it seems that when we started that is when this trouble began! Things were pretty good until we tried adding a "dream feed" (now he just wakes at 10:30 expecting to eat -- he NEVER used to waka at that time!) and tried having DH do the night feed.

Before naps, I put him down and he whines and grumbles and it just escalates and escalates. If I pick him up he goes into full cry mode. I guess I could try ignoring him but I suspect he would cry a long time. Maybe I need to try the 20 minute rule. Picking him up just makes it worse, and nursing him until he is calm and then putting him down just creates a bad pattern.

I''m ok ignoring him when he whines, btu when he starts crying hysterically it becomes harder. It is sad to see a little baby in distress and wanting something, even if it is comfort, and not give it to him.