Jessie702
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The LIW Small Talk Thread
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Jessie702
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Jessie702
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Jessie702|1293750637|2810325 said:
Those cupcakes are REALLY cute! I love the little flowers.
Eh...
I'm done for the day so I'm heading out as soon as I tape a note to the door. Then off to the store to get something for dinner and maybe lunch? Otherwise I've got some pretty yummy fire roasted tomato soup at home I can heat up.
I ordered delivery here one time and it took them nearly an hour to get here because they couldn't find the building and then I had to meet them in the parking lot because they couldn't find my office.
Got a bunch of little places (sit down & take-out) just down the road but with the road work it is hard to get to them.
So... Yeah.... I usually bring something to munch on but we don't have a microwave or refrigerator so I'm sort of limited. There is a deli downstairs when I really need something, but I don't go there often (even just a little $$ adds up quick). Would have gone there today, but they're closed.
I might check in tomorrow if I get a chance.
Have a great (and safe!) NYE!!!
Jessie702
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Jessie702
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4ever
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blacksand
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Those cupcakes look phenomenal!
I had made a New Year's Resolution to roast a whole chicken in 2010. I made about 6 other resolutions and broke at least half of them, lol. But I decided I was going to end the year right, so last night I went frantically running out to two different grocery stores. We're still not really set up in our new kitchen yet, so it was a mess and a half, but I made me some engagement chicken! It was a very new experience for me, pulling out giblets and whatnot, but it came out quite tasty. I was afraid the gravy would not be good, because the onions totally burned black in the roasting pan and were rather bitter. But it turns out the boyfriend is a huge fan of burnt onions. He LOVED the gravy, and the chicken came out evenly cooked and tender. Engagement chicken! Alas, I am still not engaged today. But I do have tasty leftovers.
I had made a New Year's Resolution to roast a whole chicken in 2010. I made about 6 other resolutions and broke at least half of them, lol. But I decided I was going to end the year right, so last night I went frantically running out to two different grocery stores. We're still not really set up in our new kitchen yet, so it was a mess and a half, but I made me some engagement chicken! It was a very new experience for me, pulling out giblets and whatnot, but it came out quite tasty. I was afraid the gravy would not be good, because the onions totally burned black in the roasting pan and were rather bitter. But it turns out the boyfriend is a huge fan of burnt onions. He LOVED the gravy, and the chicken came out evenly cooked and tender. Engagement chicken! Alas, I am still not engaged today. But I do have tasty leftovers.
captainmcgee
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Ohh the cupcakes and the chicken awww you ladies are so domestic.
Happy New Year. It is already Jan 1, 2011 here and alas no engagement, oh well. I had to have a daily peak at the ring I am having huge LIW-itis at the moment. I don't know how I will get through it! I don't think the engagment will be for at least 6 months
Happy New Year. It is already Jan 1, 2011 here and alas no engagement, oh well. I had to have a daily peak at the ring I am having huge LIW-itis at the moment. I don't know how I will get through it! I don't think the engagment will be for at least 6 months
AdanaEsq
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The cupcakes look great Jessie!
Blacksand: I stumbled across the recipe for engagement chicken again recently. Don't think I'll bother to make it for SO though. LOL
Mif: Sorry you are suffering more LIWitis. At least you know the ring is there. I think we talked about it before but it seems like the ring doesn't burn a hole in their pockets. Hopefully it will be sooner than 6 months.
Happy New Year ladies! It's 10:16am in NYC on 1/1/11. I'm annoyed with SO again. lol Last year right before the new ear, he and I were fighting, wonder if this is a trend, 2 new years in a row! Any way this time I'm annoyed for a few reasons. We leave for our cruise 1/12/11 and he still hasn't gotten his #$%@ passport! He says he sent the stuff in last month and then they said they sent it out via certified mail and he never got it. So he went into an actual passport agency office and they gave him forms and info where he can go back and get it done all in one day, they'll do the pics there for him and he won't have to pay anything. He still hasn't gone back to do it!!!! Part of me thinks maybe he never sent the stuff in and now he's trying to get a rush passport since our trip is less than 2 weeks away. I hate to think that way but really how is there no way they can find this thing?
I told him I'm considering buying a condo or co-op again. I've gone through this for awhile, I start looking and then somehow things end up falling apart with the deal. It's happened at least 2 or 3 times in the last few years. So any way, he told me he is thinking about getting a new apt so I said don't worry I won't ask you the question (about moving in together) since I know he said before he didn't know how he felt about that. He lived with an ex before and he wasn't sure he wanted to do it before getting married. he asked my opinion and I said I would if we were already engaged but without that I wouldn't think it's a good idea. That's my opinion of my current situation because I think he could get complacent and this will drag the engagement out even further. With someone else maybe things would be different. Any way so of course he didn't even ask me which would have been nice. I told him that I think in terms of "we" and I don't know if he does. I think about how my actions will affect him and us but I don't think he does sometimes. Of course he got his feelings hurt but really that's just how it feels to me. He just frustrates me because he totally doesn't see how scared/nervous he seems in all this and tries to play it off as he's not ready. He told me he's been talking to friends of his that are married and asking them how they knew they were ready. To me this shows he's not ready (if you have to ask then you're not). He said a friend of his said to think of the things you want to do before getting married like things you think you couldn't do if you were married and he says travel more. What? I love to travel. I take at least 1-2 big trips (international) a year. He says he thinks traveling when you're married is different and there's more responsibility??? Then says well after you're married you can't travel alone. I explained that I don't think that's true, I think you can still travel alone every so often like a guy's trip for a friend's bachelor party or something like that. He had some weird scenario about if he needed a break say from work not me but I couldn't get away then he wouldn't be able to go away by himself. Any way, I'm just at a point where I need to take care of myself and do what makes me happy and if he wants to step up then fine, if not then we'll end up however we're supposed to.
if you've made it through this entire thing thanks!
Please comment.
Blacksand: I stumbled across the recipe for engagement chicken again recently. Don't think I'll bother to make it for SO though. LOL
Mif: Sorry you are suffering more LIWitis. At least you know the ring is there. I think we talked about it before but it seems like the ring doesn't burn a hole in their pockets. Hopefully it will be sooner than 6 months.
Happy New Year ladies! It's 10:16am in NYC on 1/1/11. I'm annoyed with SO again. lol Last year right before the new ear, he and I were fighting, wonder if this is a trend, 2 new years in a row! Any way this time I'm annoyed for a few reasons. We leave for our cruise 1/12/11 and he still hasn't gotten his #$%@ passport! He says he sent the stuff in last month and then they said they sent it out via certified mail and he never got it. So he went into an actual passport agency office and they gave him forms and info where he can go back and get it done all in one day, they'll do the pics there for him and he won't have to pay anything. He still hasn't gone back to do it!!!! Part of me thinks maybe he never sent the stuff in and now he's trying to get a rush passport since our trip is less than 2 weeks away. I hate to think that way but really how is there no way they can find this thing?
I told him I'm considering buying a condo or co-op again. I've gone through this for awhile, I start looking and then somehow things end up falling apart with the deal. It's happened at least 2 or 3 times in the last few years. So any way, he told me he is thinking about getting a new apt so I said don't worry I won't ask you the question (about moving in together) since I know he said before he didn't know how he felt about that. He lived with an ex before and he wasn't sure he wanted to do it before getting married. he asked my opinion and I said I would if we were already engaged but without that I wouldn't think it's a good idea. That's my opinion of my current situation because I think he could get complacent and this will drag the engagement out even further. With someone else maybe things would be different. Any way so of course he didn't even ask me which would have been nice. I told him that I think in terms of "we" and I don't know if he does. I think about how my actions will affect him and us but I don't think he does sometimes. Of course he got his feelings hurt but really that's just how it feels to me. He just frustrates me because he totally doesn't see how scared/nervous he seems in all this and tries to play it off as he's not ready. He told me he's been talking to friends of his that are married and asking them how they knew they were ready. To me this shows he's not ready (if you have to ask then you're not). He said a friend of his said to think of the things you want to do before getting married like things you think you couldn't do if you were married and he says travel more. What? I love to travel. I take at least 1-2 big trips (international) a year. He says he thinks traveling when you're married is different and there's more responsibility??? Then says well after you're married you can't travel alone. I explained that I don't think that's true, I think you can still travel alone every so often like a guy's trip for a friend's bachelor party or something like that. He had some weird scenario about if he needed a break say from work not me but I couldn't get away then he wouldn't be able to go away by himself. Any way, I'm just at a point where I need to take care of myself and do what makes me happy and if he wants to step up then fine, if not then we'll end up however we're supposed to.
if you've made it through this entire thing thanks!
Please comment.
maebelle
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I don't think asking friends how they knew is a sign he isn't ready. I think most people talk things out with their friends like this.
As for the condo thing, he knows your stance, so you've done exactly what you should have done here. I'm not sure living together would cause him to push the engagement back further, but he knows how you feel and that is that.
And as for traveling, I don't think it's different when you are married, you should still be able to go on trips by yourself (especially if the reason you aren't going together is that one of you can get time off and the other can't). The only time I can imagine that marriage should change travel is when you have children, which changes the situation entirely.
As for the condo thing, he knows your stance, so you've done exactly what you should have done here. I'm not sure living together would cause him to push the engagement back further, but he knows how you feel and that is that.
And as for traveling, I don't think it's different when you are married, you should still be able to go on trips by yourself (especially if the reason you aren't going together is that one of you can get time off and the other can't). The only time I can imagine that marriage should change travel is when you have children, which changes the situation entirely.
AdanaEsq
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AdanaEsq:
If you really want to buy a condo then I say you buy one. I understand that you love your bf but you need to be honest with yourself and see if you both are in the same places in life. If you are ready to settle down/buy a house/get engaged and he's dragging his feet (and doesn't have any really good reasons that you understand and you've discussed AND figured out how you can work together towards how to get over those reason (maybe it's school and when he graduates, etc) then I suggest you start thinking of your relationship on a different level. I would put him back into the "dating" level and see him when it works for you, but mostly you just live your life the way that makes you happy. If he wants to be along for the ride, he needs to understand that changes/compromises need to be made or at least communicated to you. If you really can't see your life WITHOUT him, and him the father of your children, in the rocking chair on the porch when your old and grey, I'd reconsider your relationship with him.
I know this is probably hard to hear, and I have NO RIGHT to tell you what to do. But I just want you to be honest with yourself and reflect in your own heart. Do what's best for you in the long run. If you want to hold out because you love each other and you can't see your life with out him, then by all means, stay with him. However, in my short years I've come to realize that love isn't enough. There is a lot more to consider when your talking the rest of your life and love isn't enough for that. Take a couple of weeks to yourself, take a short break and reflect on where your going, where you've been, and if where you will be compared to where you want to be. If he falls into that equation and is willing to work towards the same goals that you have, GREAT! If not...perhaps it's time to reconsider who gets your love. Because you want someone who's going to love every inch of you, the good and the bad, and work with you towards becoming the person you want to be, and vice versa. If you feel like he's dragging his feet, then he probably is. Now its time to figure out why. If the why's are worth it to you, and he's willing to work on moving towards a commitment of the level you want, then stick it out. If he's not willing to talk about the why's and work with you towards a common goal, it's time to walk. There have been MANY threads about men dragging your feet. One turned out to be bi/gay and was hiding it because of the way his family would take it. She had MOVED to be with him (without an engagement) and stumbled upon info by accident. Not suggesting your man is hiding something that big, but there are many reasons men drag their feet. Another woman waited 8 years for a proposal, one never came, left him, got the proposal, said yes, and then afterwords left him ( he wouldn't set a wedding date, he thought a ring would be enough) and now is MUCH happier and (I think) now married.
All's I'm saying is don't put your life on hold for a man unless he's willing to do the same for you. You only get one shot at living and I'd be danged if I waited around for a guy to drag his feet to decide if he loves to enough to commit. You either do, or you don't. And if you do, he'd be willing to work on whatever is ailing him with you so that way he can move forward in the relationship. If he doesn't, he doesn't love you the way he's should, because if he loved you he'd realize that his issues are hurting you and your relationship and be willing to work together to help that.
Keep in mind when I use HE I'm not referring specifically to your SO, it's for any relationship with any guy. I don't know your SO and your relationship enough to make statements like that. It's merely food for thought.
HUGS to you and DUST to everyone!
If you really want to buy a condo then I say you buy one. I understand that you love your bf but you need to be honest with yourself and see if you both are in the same places in life. If you are ready to settle down/buy a house/get engaged and he's dragging his feet (and doesn't have any really good reasons that you understand and you've discussed AND figured out how you can work together towards how to get over those reason (maybe it's school and when he graduates, etc) then I suggest you start thinking of your relationship on a different level. I would put him back into the "dating" level and see him when it works for you, but mostly you just live your life the way that makes you happy. If he wants to be along for the ride, he needs to understand that changes/compromises need to be made or at least communicated to you. If you really can't see your life WITHOUT him, and him the father of your children, in the rocking chair on the porch when your old and grey, I'd reconsider your relationship with him.
I know this is probably hard to hear, and I have NO RIGHT to tell you what to do. But I just want you to be honest with yourself and reflect in your own heart. Do what's best for you in the long run. If you want to hold out because you love each other and you can't see your life with out him, then by all means, stay with him. However, in my short years I've come to realize that love isn't enough. There is a lot more to consider when your talking the rest of your life and love isn't enough for that. Take a couple of weeks to yourself, take a short break and reflect on where your going, where you've been, and if where you will be compared to where you want to be. If he falls into that equation and is willing to work towards the same goals that you have, GREAT! If not...perhaps it's time to reconsider who gets your love. Because you want someone who's going to love every inch of you, the good and the bad, and work with you towards becoming the person you want to be, and vice versa. If you feel like he's dragging his feet, then he probably is. Now its time to figure out why. If the why's are worth it to you, and he's willing to work on moving towards a commitment of the level you want, then stick it out. If he's not willing to talk about the why's and work with you towards a common goal, it's time to walk. There have been MANY threads about men dragging your feet. One turned out to be bi/gay and was hiding it because of the way his family would take it. She had MOVED to be with him (without an engagement) and stumbled upon info by accident. Not suggesting your man is hiding something that big, but there are many reasons men drag their feet. Another woman waited 8 years for a proposal, one never came, left him, got the proposal, said yes, and then afterwords left him ( he wouldn't set a wedding date, he thought a ring would be enough) and now is MUCH happier and (I think) now married.
All's I'm saying is don't put your life on hold for a man unless he's willing to do the same for you. You only get one shot at living and I'd be danged if I waited around for a guy to drag his feet to decide if he loves to enough to commit. You either do, or you don't. And if you do, he'd be willing to work on whatever is ailing him with you so that way he can move forward in the relationship. If he doesn't, he doesn't love you the way he's should, because if he loved you he'd realize that his issues are hurting you and your relationship and be willing to work together to help that.
Keep in mind when I use HE I'm not referring specifically to your SO, it's for any relationship with any guy. I don't know your SO and your relationship enough to make statements like that. It's merely food for thought.
HUGS to you and DUST to everyone!
Jessie702
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AdanaEsq
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Vintage: first, thanks for your response. I appreciate your well thought out reply. For the most part I was venting. I've been married before, in a 10 year relationship which I ended. I definitely have no intention of putting my life on hold for anyone. He and I spoke awhile back and we'll revisit the engagement timeline around August if he hasn't proposed by then. Overall I think this is the healthiest relationship I've ever been in and we have been together almost year and half with minimal problems. He has his reasons why he wants to wait mainly to finish school but I guess since this is on his mind he's been asking his friends what they were thinking/how they knew they were ready. We have our cruise coming up on January 12th for 10 days and hopefully that time will help either way.
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AdanaEsq said:
That's good to hear! At least he's in school and is working on figuring out where he stands where he stands. I say if things are going good, and you communicate well, just keep on keeping on. I'd still look for your condo (perhaps with him) and see if you can find something you'd be able to live in even after an engagement comes.
Don't worry about venting, because that's what we are here for!
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AE -- If I had to do it over again (and had the money to manage it...) I'd go for the condo/house and live separately until engaged. I don't know if it slowed down getting engaged, but it certainly added a lot of stress and worry for me (what if it doesn't work out? What if he takes too long and I leave... what about the cats? couch? I'm spending all this time/money on YOUR thing that YOU get to keep if...)
Sorry such a short reply -- I'm running out of here in 5 minutes to head for class.
Sorry such a short reply -- I'm running out of here in 5 minutes to head for class.
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Oh well.....
Only for the government does $12,000 - $12,000 = $10,000
Talked to the guy (our tax person) today and he said the numbers are correct so.... keep on paying and what would have been a refund (and gone to wedding stuff ) goes to pay this.
At least it will all be done and we can just move forward already
Only for the government does $12,000 - $12,000 = $10,000
Talked to the guy (our tax person) today and he said the numbers are correct so.... keep on paying and what would have been a refund (and gone to wedding stuff
) goes to pay this.At least it will all be done and we can just move forward already
AdanaEsq
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Too: I kind of feel the same way. I mean I really don't know if it would slow things down (living together), he actually said with his ex that he almost proposed to (nasty break up b/c she was cheating) and he said their living together sped up his timeline because he didn't want people to think they were just shaking up but I don't know. It's not like he's enthusiastic about moving in together.
I am so sorry about that tax bill! Last year I had to pay $1200 in federal taxes and it hurt! $10,000 is much worse!
I am so sorry about that tax bill! Last year I had to pay $1200 in federal taxes and it hurt! $10,000 is much worse!
Jessie702
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Adanas- Im sorry, but i feel maybe its best to wait. As silly as it sounds" Why buy the cow, if you can get the milk for free" thats how i feel and still fell with C until he sets a date, i will still be living with my mother. Sorry, but if cant set a date in stone, than no reason for us to live together. Hell i might wait till the wedding...lol
Too- I am so sorry hon. At least the IRS will be paid off, but still sorry. Anyway to do a small wedding with just family and friends, and maybe a easy dinner?
Is it silly of me to go looking at wedding Gowns tommorow?? I want to go and look, and get an idea as far as price goes
Too- I am so sorry hon. At least the IRS will be paid off, but still sorry. Anyway to do a small wedding with just family and friends, and maybe a easy dinner?
Is it silly of me to go looking at wedding Gowns tommorow?? I want to go and look, and get an idea as far as price goes
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AdanaEsq
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Jessie702
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captainmcgee
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beezygal
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Happy new year ladies! I haven't been on since last year. I have been going out everyday. My FI has this week off too, so I didn't have much time checking PS.
OMG... Jessie! I might sound stupid... But i didn't know LV has snow. MY FI was thinking the same thing too. it snowed here a little this morning too. Where are the pictures???? I want to see!!!!
OMG... Jessie! I might sound stupid... But i didn't know LV has snow. MY FI was thinking the same thing too.
it snowed here a little this morning too. Where are the pictures???? I want to see!!!!
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beezygal
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How are you? How's wedding planning?
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mif_|1294272824|2815283 said:Hi ladies
hope you are all well. I need advice and have posted over in the rockytalk thread. please help!!
Hi Mif
I posted on your RT thread.
It's nice to see another nit-picky, worrier who notices every last flaw (or possible flaw!) in stuff!
You've got an AWESOME upgrade policy! I don't think you need to rush into anything but if you think you're going to be unhappy with it later, you might want to see what other stones they have available. Once he proposes, you probably won't want to not wear it for weeks while they switch stones!
So that's a bit different than what I posted in your other thread! Gah! Me and my brain...
....You should hear my inner thoughts & conversations with FI about my ring!....
(all my thoughts/speach... poor FI just doesn't know about diamonds so pretty much just listens to me-- he says he's got no problem buying whatever I want once our finances are a bit more secure in a few years)
"I think I want bigger"
"I want bigger"
"Do you see the little mark there??"
"Hmmm.... Maybe bigger is a bad idea."
"Maybe that mark was just a drop of water."
"No... I want better stones."
"Same size, just nicer clarity/color."
"Well... maybe a bit bigger"
"If I'm at a desk anyway... maybe a 2ct center with 1ct sides???"
"But what about cooking?... Gee... maybe I like this size"
"I don't like the channel set... maybe bezel."
"Gah! I don't like bezel... the channel set are so clean looking."
"But what will people say when I get a new one???"
"Would it be too strange to wear the old as a RHR since the new would be 3 stone also?"
"I could sell this one since it would be a pitty to put in a box and never wear"
"I'll neve take it off -- it's special!"
Anyway..... Sorry.....
I was thinking about that again this morning so I had plenty of random, confused, strange thoughts!
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