Posters, I can''t believe I even have to say this.

[Ellen]

I am posting this in here, because I figure it may get read more than in Hangout. And imho, it needs to be read.



I have noticed, ever since I started posting here, that occasionally you''''d have a poster who makes a thread asking for help, or more frequently, posts a pretty for us to rave over, only to either never come back to the thread, or come back to maybe answer ONE posters question, and that''''s it. No THANK YOU, anywhere. I realize we weren''''t all brought up by Miss Manner''''s, but this is really pretty basic.

Someone takes the time to help you, you say thank you.

Someone gushes over your latest purchase, you say thank you.


What I''''ve noticed more and more, is that these two simple words are lacking with more and more frequency. And it''''s rude, plain and simple. And I''''m not the only one who''''s noticed this. One very clever poster got so fed up with it, she figured out a rather creative way of making someone say thank you. So it''''s not just me.

I can''''t imagine someone doing this in public. Just picture it, someone comments on your gorgeous ring, and you just walk away? I don''''t think so.


Now, I''''m not saying you should thank every single person, but please, say it at least once. It''''s the polite thing to do.

And just for the record, no I''''m not PMSing, no I didn''''t have a bad day, and no I don''''t need some.

 

[choro72]

I agree...I think that for some people it''s easy to throw out common courtesy when it comes to online interaction. They are never going to see the other party so it doesn''t matter what they do right? Just walk away, and you won''t see our reaction...

*sigh*, it''s ironic that we can connect with unlimited number of people around the world, but it''s so impersonal.

Date: 2/22/2008 9:14:44 PM
Author:Ellen
And just for the record, no I''m not PMSing, no I didn''t have a bad day, and no I don''t need some.

chuckle...

 

[Dreamer_D]

 

[cutes814]

awww, ellen...*reaching out to give you a hug* cuz i appreciate you!

ya, that sucks. i know how ya feel.

i was recently on RT and helped a few people and not a single thanks either. it is kinda rude. i mean, it takes a lot of time and effort to help them, ya know?


now as for the compliments on their pretties, i''m too mesmorized

by the beauty of their baubles to even notice they did not say thank you...kekeke...actually i feel i have to thank THEM in return for posting it so i can see it...kekeke...

 

[Ellen]

Date: 2/22/2008 9:26:33 PM
Author: choro72
I agree...I think that for some people it''s easy to throw out common courtesy when it comes to online interaction. They are never going to see the other party so it doesn''t matter what they do right? Just walk away, and you won''t see our reaction...

*sigh*, it''s ironic that we can connect with unlimited number of people around the world, but it''s so impersonal.

I suppose that could account for some of it...It just amazes me that people can just not say thank you, no matter "where" you are.

Glad you got a chuckle too.

 

[babysteps]

I''m a newbie, but totally agree -- it bugs me when people don''t acknowledge a kindness - it''s just good manners, and it also carries over to all our interactions. Seriously, when you let someone out in traffic and they give you the "thanks" wave, doesn''t it just FEEL better, and give you that warm fuzzy, than if they gun out and ignore you? Or, my personal peeve, not saying a word when I hold the door open for someone - HELLO!

OK, I will climb back down off my soapbox, but sincerely agree that cyber-manners are as important (maybe more so, since our words are all we have here) as real world manners.

 

[Ellen]

Thanks dreamer and Milly.

 

[Ellen]

Date: 2/22/2008 9:36:17 PM
Author: babysteps
I''m a newbie, but totally agree -- it bugs me when people don''t acknowledge a kindness - it''s just good manners, and it also carries over to all our interactions. Seriously, when you let someone out in traffic and they give you the ''thanks'' wave, doesn''t it just FEEL better, and give you that warm fuzzy, than if they gun out and ignore you? Or, my personal peeve, not saying a word when I hold the door open for someone - HELLO!

OK, I will climb back down off my soapbox, but sincerely agree that cyber-manners are as important (maybe more so, since our words are all we have here) as real world manners.

Yes, it does. I totally agree with you.

And it''s also made me hesitate to comment to some of the "veterans" on here the next time they post something pretty. I''m not gonna run to compliment you when you can''t even aknowledge it.

 

[Ellen]

Date: 2/22/2008 9:34:57 PM
Author: Milly
awww, ellen...*reaching out to give you a hug* cuz i appreciate you!

ya, that sucks. i know how ya feel.

i was recently on RT and helped a few people and not a single thanks either. it is kinda rude. i mean, it takes a lot of time and effort to help them, ya know?


now as for the compliments on their pretties, i''m too mesmorized

by the beauty of their baubles to even notice they did not say thank you...kekeke...actually i feel i have to thank THEM in return for posting it so i can see it...kekeke...

This one can really be frustrating. And the thing is, they''re usually newbs, so you don''t KNOW they won''t appreciate what you''ve done, until they don''t do it!

/www.pricescope.com/idealbb/images/smilies/9.gif[/img]

 

[Kaleigh]

Ellen,
I hear you and agree for the most part. I call them drive by's....

 

[cutes814]

<----- Makes me wanna do this.

ya, that''s it and then makes me not wanna help the next person in RT. so i usually have a take a little break before heading back to that forum.

 

[mrssalvo]

oh goodness...i just had to go look at my recent thread and make sure I didn''t leave you out

...thank goodness i didn''t...you had me worried there for a minute

i''ve noticed it here or there too, especially when i ask the question and the OP never answers

. such is life on a internet forum I guess??

 

[Ellen]

Date: 2/22/2008 9:45:02 PM
Author: Kaleigh
Ellen,
I hear you and agree for the most part. I call them drive by''s....

lol Yeah well, they could at least "honk their horn" once on the way through.

Milly, I know. I should probably take breaks too. Must be a sucker for punishment.

 

[Ellen]

Date: 2/22/2008 9:48:46 PM
Author: mrssalvo
oh goodness...i just had to go look at my recent thread and make sure I didn''t leave you out

...thank goodness i didn''t...you had me worried there for a minute

i''ve noticed it here or there too, especially when i ask the question and the OP never answers

. such is life on a internet forum I guess??

Oh for heaven''s sake, you would never be so rude!

Yes, I guess you have to take the bad with the good.

 

[Dreamer_D]

**Threadjack: Ellen I want to post this here cuz I know you will see it: Your avatar picture is AMAZING!! It is the most beautiful picture of an RB I have ever seen (no offense to all the other pretties) and it has convinced me 100% that I am going to trade in my side-stones and get and RB. And take a photography class! Brilliant!**END

DD

 

[Tacori E-ring]

What bothers me is when someone has a problem and I take time to post (what I hope) is a thoughtful reply and the OP just ignores it. It does make me pause next time I go to respond to someone. In return I hope I have never forgotten to thank someone (though I know I haven''t posted any pretties in a *very* long time

) But I hear what you are saying Ellen!

 

[Kaleigh]

Date: 2/22/2008 9:52:06 PM
Author: Ellen

Date: 2/22/2008 9:45:02 PM
Author: Kaleigh
Ellen,
I hear you and agree for the most part. I call them drive by''s....

lol Yeah well, they could at least ''honk their horn'' once on the way through.

Milly, I know. I should probably take breaks too. Must be a sucker for punishment.

Yup a honk, a simple wave would be nice.

 

[Mannequin]

Kudos to you, Ellen, for bringing this up.

Common courtesy unfortunately seems to be going the way of the dodo, both in online communities and in real life. It''s sad when people need a reminder to be polite.

I believe the old saying is that "you get more flies with honey than you do with vinegar" - a little respect goes a LONG way.

 

[Ellen]

Date: 2/22/2008 9:57:25 PM
Author: dreamer_dachsie
**Threadjack: Ellen I want to post this here cuz I know you will see it: Your avatar picture is AMAZING!! It is the most beautiful picture of an RB I have ever seen (no offense to all the other pretties) and it has convinced me 100% that I am going to trade in my side-stones and get and RB. And take a photography class! Brilliant!**END

DD

Aww, thank you!! I really did get lucky on that one.

I would say, just be sure this is what you want to do, but you do seem pretty sure!

I look forward to your new stone and pics!

 

[Ellen]

Date: 2/22/2008 10:01:44 PM
Author: Tacori E-ring
What bothers me is when someone has a problem and I take time to post (what I hope) is a thoughtful reply and the OP just ignores it. It does make me pause next time I go to respond to someone. In return I hope I have never forgotten to thank someone (though I know I haven''t posted any pretties in a *very* long time

) But I hear what you are saying Ellen!

I know Tacori, I''ve felt the same at times. But then I realize everyone can''t respond to every post sometimes. So I just "hope" mine helped, and move on.

 

[Ellen]

Kaleigh, exactly.


equestrienne, yep. A little goes a long way. And those who don''t on a constant basis I''ve learned from, and I simply don''t post to them anymore.

 

[Kaleigh]

Date: 2/22/2008 10:01:44 PM
Author: Tacori E-ring
What bothers me is when someone has a problem and I take time to post (what I hope) is a thoughtful reply and the OP just ignores it. It does make me pause next time I go to respond to someone. In return I hope I have never forgotten to thank someone (though I know I haven't posted any pretties in a *very* long time

) But I hear what you are saying Ellen!

I hear you Tacori, your posts are very helpful. They don't go unoticed, you are truly an asset to the PS community!!

 

[Gypsy]

I hope I say thank you for all the help I received. I try to remember to. But if I haven''t at times, then I''ll say it now. THANK YOU!!!

 

[Ellen]

Date: 2/22/2008 10:16:09 PM
Author: Gypsy
I hope I say thank you for all the help I received. I try to remember to. But if I haven''t at times, then I''ll say it now. THANK YOU!!!

Got ya all on yer toes now! muahahahahahahahaaaaaaaa

And you do sweetie.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

Oh thanks Lisa! You always say the nicest things! You made my night. Sometimes I wonder though

Ellen, you are right. Not everyone has time (I know I don''t always) but there were a few in which I *really* opened up in and guess I expected some sort of reply. When there was none I figured why did I bother.

 

[Gypsy]

Date: 2/22/2008 10:20:43 PM
Author: Tacori E-ring
Oh thanks Lisa! You always say the nicest things! You made my night. Sometimes I wonder though

Ellen, you are right. Not everyone has time (I know I don''t always) but there were a few in which I *really* opened up in and guess I expected some sort of reply. When there was none I figured why did I bother.

Tacori, I missed one of your posts in my Ring thread about Tessa. I felt bad about that but I never saw, until Wink bumped it a few weeks later. It, I just hope I never made you feel I didn''t appreciate you or care about you or Tessa or Hubby.


And yes, Ellen. You definitely have me on my toes. Thank you for letting me know that I''ve at least,mostly, been appreciative of all that this forum provides.

 

[isaku5]

I agree with everything said here. How long does it take to write, Thank you or Thanks.

I know that this seems to be the case IRL more and more often. Scary.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

oh, Gypsy! I *promise* I wasn''t referring to you! You are always thoughtful.

 

[diamondfan]

I agree!

There is so much great information here, and I always appreciate that people see a thread and take time to help out a fellow PS'er.

But (and this is my opinion for what it is worth) I have noticed there are people here (more like one person) who drains people for information constantly and yet, I have noticed, I do not see this same poster really ever add anything positive to similar threads or any threads, for that matter. Or thank people for their help...it is like, down the rabbit hole with more and more going out to help. I would think this person is sort of a taker in life too. Now, the unfortunate effect of it is I avoid this poster's threads because I feel it is a waste of time.

I have gone on threads (I hit "posted today" so I see them, I tend not to look at specific categories) and I have tried to help out on engaged threads or career threads or pregnancy threads, whether or not those topics have current relevance, I do try to chime in if I think I can give anything useful. I do not presume all my comments or advice hit home at all, but I certainly offer it up with the best of intentions. And while I do not need anyone gushing over it, I am pleased when I am noticed for having helped or tried to help. It just seems like a little thing you can do to have a nice two way street of helping, being helped, and acknowledging it. This is a place I tend to come to have the nice interactions, a healthy debate or spirited disagreement on views is even great when there is the respect to agree to disagree. But I do notice the support when given and I really do value it. No one here has to take the time to respond but mostly all of those who do are all trying to contribute in a positive way.

 

[coatimundi_org]

Thank you for saying that, Ellen!

Or should I say, "Thankies"

(I like your version!)

I''m a newbie, but I''ve noticed it too...