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Cushion modified brilliant vs Old miner help

Yes good point @Lookinagain . You really need to focus either on 6-8 prongs or else a faux bezel style or collett style or you will have girls chip. You could also get the girdle faceted but you would lose weight and there is risk in that. It’s not something I would ever do. I would just choose rhe right setting.

Langs is a good place to look for inspiration. I’m sorry but I’m not great with US geography and I don’t know how far you are from LA lol but there are many great shops there like Singlestone and David Klass. Isn’t Joe Escobar around there? These are all places I have heard mentioned. Maybe some people know of closer suggestions.
 
newtojewels said:
Also, Trabert Goldsmith in SF has a 2.99 K/SI1 OEC in an Erika Winters setting.

The OEC at Trabert which made me realize I wanted 3 carats!
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It’s been about 15 years since I made the mistake of going to Trabert. I hope he has learned how not to be terrible since then. (Yes, I can hold a grudge!)
 
JPie said:
It’s been about 15 years since I made the mistake of going to Trabert. I hope he has learned how not to be terrible since then. (Yes, I can hold a grudge!)
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For a special purchase like jewelry, every purchase should feel great and holding a grudge seems very reasonable! It might have been your post that made me decide to go elsewhere for the Erika Winters setting even though it would be super convenient to do it in my area.
 
Thank you all for sharing your advice on the setting!

I am on Day 4 of deciding if I should keep this stone or not. I have about 2 more days to contemplate before she has to go back :(

I love her sparkle so much... but I still can't decide if the warmth bothers me or not!

I already showed the stone to my mom and some friends, and they immediately pointed out the warmth like it was a bad thing :( Like @Dreamer_D said, I am probably falling victim to caring too much what other people think :(( (I can't help it!)

Since a lot of my peers don't really know about antique stones, I don't want people to look down on the warmth! For those of you with warmer stones, how do you explain why warmer stones deserve just as much love and respect as their more colorless counterparts? I think I just need a pep talk lol! :saint:
 
First of all, it sounds like you're going from what your friends/family think to what we think and not focusing on what you think!

A question to consider is what you could actually spend to get the 'perfect' diamond and to rank how important characteristics are to you up to that budget.

If you want colorless-to-near-colorless, big, and an antique look, you could achieve that with a lab diamond. Although a lot of the newly-cut old mines aren't my jam, I do like this one:

If you want colorless-to-near-colorless and a genuine antique old mine, you'll have to either way up the budget or go smaller. Maybe seeing that 2 carat D at Lang could give you an idea of how that would feel to you, though of course that's more round than cushion-y.

If you want less tinted and are willing to give up the cushion-y shape, from what I've seen and read it seems like OECs and especially transitionals can face up whiter than OMCs plus well-cut ones seem to be more common. Hopefully @lulu_ma and @Dreamer_D can confirm that!

We can't answer this for you, unfortunately! But what we think doesn't matter at all and what your family/friends think only matters as much as you let it matter.

Good luck!
 
When I was shopping, I was able to see larger old cuts in E,I,J & K color. For me, the E & I color stones did have the rainbow fire I was looking for.

@peachflower how do you feel about the face up color? I hope that you are able to see some more old cuts in the next couple of days.
 
I just remembered that Maven Lane had a ring with a 2-ish? carat F/VVS old mine when I saw her a week and change ago, she may still have it if you can get to Sonoma. I strongly preferred the cut on the one I ended up purchasing over the F but that was my priority list and may not be yours! And like @lulu_ma said, I really hope you can make the time to see other stones over the next few days.

Also, it's totally possible that you love the idea/romance of an antique stone but that the look isn't 100% for you and that's totally fine too.

There's also 66Mint in SF:

2.78 L OEC: https://www.66mint.com/collections/...l-2-78ct-old-euro-18k-white-gold-diamond-ring

1.02 I OMC: https://www.66mint.com/collections/...ous-1-02ct-old-mine-cut-platinum-diamond-ring
 
newtojewels said:
First of all, it sounds like you're going from what your friends/family think to what we think and not focusing on what you think!

A question to consider is what you could actually spend to get the 'perfect' diamond and to rank how important characteristics are to you up to that budget.

If you want colorless-to-near-colorless, big, and an antique look, you could achieve that with a lab diamond. Although a lot of the newly-cut old mines aren't my jam, I do like this one:

If you want colorless-to-near-colorless and a genuine antique old mine, you'll have to either way up the budget or go smaller. Maybe seeing that 2 carat D at Lang could give you an idea of how that would feel to you, though of course that's more round than cushion-y.

If you want less tinted and are willing to give up the cushion-y shape, from what I've seen and read it seems like OECs and especially transitionals can face up whiter than OMCs plus well-cut ones seem to be more common. Hopefully @lulu_ma and @Dreamer_D can confirm that!

We can't answer this for you, unfortunately! But what we think doesn't matter at all and what your family/friends think only matters as much as you let it matter.

Good luck!
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Ibrakeforpossums said:
Friends pointing out the warmth puts my back up. I would say, "This is how an antique diamond looks. You won't see this at Zales."
newtojewels has excellent advice above.
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I fear you're right... :angel: I have to just get over what others might think and go with what I want! Honestly I love the look of this stone in terms of shape, size, and sparkle! I don't think it's worth it to up my budget an insane amount just so people don't comment on warmth... I did see another OMC which was around 2.3ct J color and I just didn't love the size/sparkle as much. I am going to spend the next couple of days staring at the stone some more :lol:

And @lulu_ma The face-up color is beautiful in my opinion! I really do love it and it looks very white to me! But my friend pointed out, if I was to put it right next to another friend's E color lab stone... it would definitely look quite yellow o_O I think I need to embrace her for the true antique she is, which I feel like I'm forgetting really is rare!!

Thank you all! I will keep you updated with my decision <3
 
peachflower said:
I don't think it's worth it to up my budget an insane amount just so people don't comment on warmth
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FWIW one of my first diamonds was an Asscher L with medium fluor. I was a bit ashamed and only wore it outdoors or in restaurants for three years. I've done a 180, it's my most treasured piece. It performs beautifiully and now I could weather any criticism.
 
No one in my real life has ever said anything about my diamond other that "Wowee!" lol...

But if I had people who did, I would say "This diamond was cut in the 1860s and this is what diamonds looked like back then!" And leave it at that!

Or if I was feeling mean I'd say "Oh yes I love the warm glow. White diamonds just look fake to me." :evil2:
 
peachflower said:
if I was to put it right next to another friend's E color lab stone... it would definitely look quite yellow o_O
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lol... what a weird and hilarious comparison! I don't personally have anything against a lab diamond, to each their own, but it is some kind of weird alternative reality where you are supposed to feel embarrassed about your amazing, rare, and very expensive antique when compared to a lab stone that is a dime a dozen.
 
I will gently suggest, though, that if the warmth isn't pleasing to you, whether or not others comment on it/you care about what they think, this is a lot of money to spend on something with a color that you may increasingly be bothered by. Some of us love warmth, some don't, and neither of those is wrong. I started with an I color modern antique cut round thinking how could a little warmth from the side bother me, especially since I didn't really like icy white, and then have ended up with an F color modern antique cut cushion because it turns out it did bother me. I have seen K colors of the same round cut and loved them for what they were, but it wasn't right for my engagement ring.

It is a stunning stone and perfectly itself, but I wouldn't try to talk yourself into liking the color if you don't. I know it can be hard to tell though with a scant few days of viewing!
 
A few more discombobulated thoughts:

For whatever it's worth, I'm kind of dreading what my friends/family will say about mine because I know some of them will judge me for the size. Sometimes there's just no winning! How does it feel to defend your possible choice to your friends/family? Is it more like explaining to them why you love it or more like justifying it to yourself by justifying to them?

Even though you don't want to up the budget like crazy, this is obviously an expensive purchase so you don't want to be thinking "if only I had waited until I could get an H-I-J-K". What if you kept this one and a 3 carat J popped up next week with the faceting you like and it cost a few thousand dollars more than you spent on this one? How would that feel?

Also, how does the idea of returning the stone feel to you? Sometimes I think I need that kind of a jolt to make me realize how I actually feel about something. With my stone I had asked ML to keep me updated of any potential other buyers and I just had the worst sinking feeling when she told me about other interest and an appointment she had later on the day I was going to go back to see it the second time. To be clear, this was not a high-pressure sales tactic on her part at all! There was absolutely 0 pressure for the purchase. But it made me realize that at least in some part of my mind this was *my* stone and how dare someone else try to take it from me! :lol: In comparison, I would feel super happy for whoever gets that Park antique-style lab cushion, some of the Lang pieces, the Trabert Erika Winters ring, etc.
 
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Yeesh I'm glad I am old and don't give a sh!t anymore because life is too short to care what "friends" think about my bling. The only thing true friends should say is "wow I'm glad you are happy". Anything else is super weird and is a "them" problem not a "me" problem.
 
Dreamer_D said:
No one in my real life has ever said anything about my diamond other that "Wowee!" lol...

But if I had people who did, I would say "This diamond was cut in the 1860s and this is what diamonds looked like back then!" And leave it at that!

Or if I was feeling mean I'd say "Oh yes I love the warm glow. White diamonds just look fake to me." :evil2:
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To be fair I did ask them to just be brutally honest since I wanted unfiltered thoughts :lol: Don't think it was mean spirited at all, especially since I don't think they know the value of antique stones! If they understood the rarity, maybe they would have not felt so strongly about the warmth... :')
 
josieKat said:
It is a stunning stone and perfectly itself, but I wouldn't try to talk yourself into liking the color if you don't. I know it can be hard to tell though with a scant few days of viewing!
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newtojewels said:
A few more discombobulated thoughts:

For whatever it's worth, I'm kind of dreading what my friends/family will say about mine because I know some of them will judge me for the size. Sometimes there's just no winning! How does it feel to defend your possible choice to your friends/family? Is it more like explaining to them why you love it or more like justifying it to yourself by justifying to them?

Even though you don't want to up the budget like crazy, this is obviously an expensive purchase so you don't want to be thinking "if only I had waited until I could get an H-I-J-K". What if you kept this one and a 3 carat J popped up next week with the faceting you like and it cost a few thousand dollars more than you spent on this one? How would that feel?
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This is exactly what I'm afraid of! I don't want to say yes to this stone and then feel like maybe I'm talking myself into settling for it since it was the best option at this very moment. If a J or even K color stone with equally beautiful faceting and fire presented itself for a few thousand dollars, I think I would absolutely want it. But of course there is no guarantee of that happening, and I may lose out on this beautiful option just because I wanted a slightly whiter stone! :wall:

I may need to evaluate how I feel once I send it back and ask how much longer I truly have to decide before it may go to someone else. I am clearly not a decisive person so this is very stressful :(sadI appreciate everyone tolerating me being difficult! :angel:
 
peachflower said:
This is exactly what I'm afraid of! I don't want to say yes to this stone and then feel like maybe I'm talking myself into settling for it since it was the best option at this very moment. If a J or even K color stone with equally beautiful faceting and fire presented itself for a few thousand dollars, I think I would absolutely want it. But of course there is no guarantee of that happening, and I may lose out on this beautiful option just because I wanted a slightly whiter stone! :wall:

I may need to evaluate how I feel once I send it back and ask how much longer I truly have to decide before it may go to someone else. I am clearly not a decisive person so this is very stressful :(sadI appreciate everyone tolerating me being difficult! :angel:
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I don't think you should get this diamond just for FOMO in general for a well-cut antique stone rather than FOMO on this specific diamond.

You don't need to reply to this, but I just want to remind you that mine was $34k for a 3.1 J/VS1. I don't think you posted how much yours costs but I just want to put my price out there in case it helps you with your decision.

Here are two videos of mine in reasonable versus terrible lighting. You can see that it still absolutely looks tinted even at a J, especially in the warm room with warm lighting. Note that I am super pale!
https://imgur.com/a/57B0ncv
 
Definitely go and look at other stones if you can.

FWIW most people IRL have no idea about diamonds other than the very basics. And some people love lab diamonds and some people don't. Same with antique cuts and colour. It really comes down to what you love. I feel that if you feel like you have to defend something then maybe it's not right for you.

My mum recently asked what colour my diamond was.. it was an M.. in her Asian mind there was only DEF.. GH if you really must. She had no idea what the cut of the diamond was etc. Lucky I don't care about my mum's opinion. I even had a few jewellers say that my diamond was an "odd shape" or things like that. I just laugh and think how uneducated they are.

In saying that, if someone had said those things to me 10 years ago, I probably would have taken it to heart. There is also an option of starting off with a smaller whiter stone and upgrading in the future.
 
maryjane04 said:
Definitely go and look at other stones if you can.

FWIW most people IRL have no idea about diamonds other than the very basics. And some people love lab diamonds and some people don't. Same with antique cuts and colour. It really comes down to what you love. I feel that if you feel like you have to defend something then maybe it's not right for you.

My mum recently asked what colour my diamond was.. it was an M.. in her Asian mind there was only DEF.. GH if you really must. She had no idea what the cut of the diamond was etc. Lucky I don't care about my mum's opinion. I even had a few jewellers say that my diamond was an "odd shape" or things like that. I just laugh and think how uneducated they are.

In saying that, if someone had said those things to me 10 years ago, I probably would have taken it to heart. There is also an option of starting off with a smaller whiter stone and upgrading in the future.
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Well said!

@peachflower I know the people working at Lang will love my ring and PSers will love my ring and most importantly *I* will love my ring! I will try to let any imagined or spoken thoughts about tint or size or odd shape from anyone else just roll off my back :)

When I was working a front desk job many many years ago, I remember one of the employees disparagingly talking about how a client's ring looked so dark and yellow. I don't even know what it looked like but that stood out to me. In the era of lab stones, we will be more and more surrounded by huge, white, and visibly flawless diamonds. Maybe things like a wonky outline, bruted girdle that needs protection, and tint will help you feel that yours is historic and special or maybe it will just feel lesser-than. But you shouldn't need to convince yourself that it's worth it! Yes it's rare but there will be other beautiful diamonds. You may not be the kind of person who will ever feel 100% about anything but to me you aren't even sounding 75%. That could be because you're posting all of your worries and kind of subduing the happiness like I did in my thread at first, but I just want to mention it.

Sorry to be kind of taking over this discussion, I just feel very emotionally invested in your journey because it's so similar to mine.
 
@maryjane04 @newtojewels Thank you for the advice! And do not be sorry at all, this is what I need to hear!!!

I think I AM the type of person who is never 100% about anything! And I am harping on the negative here because I'm trying to see if it outweighs the positives.

It's funny because I feel like I was 85% about this stone, but you saying it doesn't seem like I'm even 75% has really got me thinking even more! :think:

You're right though - I shouldn't need to convince myself this stone is worth it. I should be feeling more excited and sure about it. :loopy:
 
Do you want to be sure or do you want to play it safe? I think a lot of that comes down to experience.

For the most part the engagement ring is the first real piece of jewellery you ever get so it's hard to get it perfect. Especially when your tastes change and evolve as you do too.

If you're not feeling excited by it then it's probably best to sit on it for a bit longer. Maybe return the stone and see if you feel anything missing.
 
peachflower said:
To be fair I did ask them to just be brutally honest since I wanted unfiltered thoughts :lol: Don't think it was mean spirited at all, especially since I don't think they know the value of antique stones! If they understood the rarity, maybe they would have not felt so strongly about the warmth... :')
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I understand. You were soliciting opinions! It is tinted. Objectively so.

Maybe you should just take to telling anyone who comments about the tint with a negative connotation what it cost :lol-2: It wouldn’t be much weirder or awkward than they were making it already!
 
Silly suggestion, but why don't you try literally packaging it up as if you are going to return it? Maybe draft whatever email to the vendor or start the process of obtaining an RMA. Do you feel relief? Upset? Not much of anything?
 
Going up two color grade in this size is more than a few thousand. More like 10k I would think. And a J is sti objectively tinted when compared side by side with an E color lab diamond.

What made you want an antique stone anyway? It sounds like maybe you are new to diamonds and your social circle favours labs. What drew you to hunt for this stone?
 
newtojewels said:
Silly suggestion, but why don't you try literally packaging it up as if you are going to return it? Maybe draft whatever email to the vendor or start the process of obtaining an RMA. Do you feel relief? Upset? Not much of anything?
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I’ve totally done this. I package it all up and label it then set it aside for a day. Then I really know how I feel.
 
Dreamer_D said:
Maybe you should just take to telling anyone who comments about the tint with a negative connotation what it cost :lol-2: It wouldn’t be much weirder or awkward than they were making it already!
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:lol-2: LOL that is too funny!

Dreamer_D said:
What made you want an antique stone anyway? It sounds like maybe you are new to diamonds and your social circle favours labs. What drew you to hunt for this stone?
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Yes I would say half my friends have lab, the other half have natural.

What drew me in was that antiques are all unique and special, and I want something that is one of a kind! =)2 And I just love the chunky crispy facets of old mines so much!
 
newtojewels said:
Silly suggestion, but why don't you try literally packaging it up as if you are going to return it? Maybe draft whatever email to the vendor or start the process of obtaining an RMA. Do you feel relief? Upset? Not much of anything?
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Okay I think I will draft the email and package her up tomorrow and see how I feel! :halo: The thought of doing that doesn't upset me right this moment. BUT if I was told the stone would go to someone else I think I would feel sad! LOL :wall:
 
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